DocNerd's Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths, Part 5


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DocNerd's Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths, Part 5: An Asylum Challenge

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DocNerd's Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths, Part 5

  1. 1. DrSupremeNerds Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths: An Asylum ChallengePart 5: Sleepless in StrangetownAsylum Challenge created by SimScout: one playable Sim, seven uncontrollable Sims, $100 in the bank to start, furnishingslimited in quality and quantity--the challenge ends when the playables LTW is met, or dies. Or the uncontrollables die.The playable: SimNerd, my SimSelf, a Knowledge Sim with the LTW to Max 7 Skills. Joy.The inmates, Legacy villains whose original Aspirations and original (bad) personalities have been left intact:Gaius Caesar (Netsfn1427 [Exchange]/Blite27s [] Ten Caesars), Vee Semper (GintasticNecats Science of aLegacy), Cypress Vetinari (DrSupremeNerds Vetinari Dualegacy), Uranium Apocalypso (ephemeraltoast/EphemeralToastsApocalypso-A-Go-Go), Salahuddin Chamcha (katrih83s Bookacy), Kirstial Legacina (orikes360/Orikess Pseudo Legacy),Cecil Goodytwoshoes (Loolooloo16play/professorbutterss Squeaky Clean Legacy)
  2. 2. When last we left DrSupremeNerds Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths, Cypress was "enjoying" his second post-AspirationFailure bout of volleyball-chatting.He took the fourth fire of the Asylum pretty hard, and now theres nothing SimNerd can do to bring him out of it.How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll Center of a Tootsie Pop?One...
  3. 3. Two...
  4. 4. Three...
  5. 5. Four...
  6. 6. Five...
  7. 7. Six...And no, this is NOT just another picture of the last slide; he put Dr. Wilson away, cried, andpulled the volleyball right back out again.
  8. 8. While Cypress is having a complete break from reality...SIMNERD MAXES CHARISMA!WOOOO! One down, six to go!
  9. 9. Kirstial: "Gah... Do you think we look that ridiculous when we fight?"Uranium: "I guess we must, yeah."Kirstial: "I had no idea. With the hair-pulling and the slapping... Tres tacky, you know?"Uranium: "I suppose I never gave it much thought. I mean, I enjoy beating you humans up so much."Kirstial: "Im not technically a human. See the ears? Elf."Uranium: "Elf? Really?"Kirstial: "Elf. All the way."Uranium: "You know, I dont think Ive ever WooHooed an elf before."Kirstial: "Not interested."Uranium: "If you happen to change your mind..."Kirstial: "I wont."
  10. 10. Kirstial: "This is just... not attractive."Uranium: "Fun, though."Kirstial: "Sure, fun. Way fun. Do I make that face?"Uranium: "Yup."Kirstial: "Ugh."Uranium: "You wanna go play catch or something?"Kirstial: "Yeah, okay."
  11. 11. Cecil: "Hah! Ah, Ms. Legacina, Ms. Semper and I have finished, if you and Ms. Apocalypso would like to take the floor."Kirstial: "Nah. I think were kinda done."
  12. 12. Kirstial: *WHACK*Uranium: "Ow!" *WHACK*Kirstial: "Ow!" *WHACK*Uranium: "Ow!" *WHACK*Kirstial: "Ow!"
  13. 13. Seven...
  14. 14. SimNerd: "Uranium! The least you could do is not let me catch you! I really dont want to double-minus you, because, quitefrankly, you scare the crap out of me!"Uranium: "Hehehe. Whoops."SimNerd: "You know what? I dont care..."
  15. 15. SimNerd: "...because I JUST MAXED LOGIC!"Two down, five to go.Hooray, Im tied with Gaius for total number of skills maxed! *headdesk*
  16. 16. SimNerd: "Orikes! Guess what!"Orikes: "Youre gonna come over here and greet me, arent you?"SimNerd: "Oh yeah."Orikes: "Will you be stopping them from being mean to me?"SimNerd: "Uh, Ill be skilling. Which is more or less all Ive done for the past two weeks, aside from breaks for the potty andpaying bills."
  17. 17. Eight...
  18. 18. Nine...
  19. 19. Cecil: "There is so much that is unpleasant about tickling another man in his underpants, but I seem to be unable to stop."Cypress: "What? You say I should consult my life coach?"Cecil: "I said no such thing, Mr. Vetinari."Cypress: "All right!"
  20. 20. Ten...
  21. 21. Gaius: "Im Serving Grilled Cheese Sandwiches!"
  22. 22. Gah, and Im making SimNerd eat one NOW STOP FREAKING WHINING ALREADY YOU MORON.
  23. 23. Salahuddin: "Dont mind me, Im just skilling myself into Platinum."Great. Another smug crazy person.
  24. 24. Eleven...
  25. 25. Uranium and Kirstial may be cool with each other now, but Vee still hates Cecil and Cypress. This is Cecil.
  26. 26. Cecil wins. She may have beat Cypress, but shes never beat Cecil.
  27. 27. And then she goes and picks a fight with Cypress. Maybe shes figuring all that time spent with Dr. Wilson has dulled hisreflexes.
  28. 28. She might be right about that.
  29. 29. Twelve...
  30. 30. Gaius: "Hey, Kirstial! Wanna get married?"Kirstial: "To you? Dont make me laugh! GREASY SMUDGE."Gaius: "How bout you, Salahuddin? I hear that Marriage For All hack is installed!"Salahuddin: "I would rather set myself on fire."Kirstial: "Dont knock it til youve tried it."
  31. 31. Thirteen...
  32. 32. Creativity is done!Three down, four to go!
  33. 33. Fourteen...Holy crap this is getting ridiculous. Can a wolf just wander by or something?
  34. 34. Huh.Ask and ye shall receive, I guess.I think this means were done with the volleyball for a while.
  35. 35. Cecil: "Money!"Cypress: "Roll See Wolf. Its a lifesaver, I tell ya."Cecil: "Regrettably, Mr. Vetinari, I am not a Knowledge Sim, and therefore the odds of rolling that particular Want areastronomically low."Cypress: "Whoa. Sucks to be you."
  36. 36. Gaius is a gigantic sack of PHAIL.That is all.
  37. 37. Uranium: "WooHoo? Im not picky; Ill settle for the cheese freak."
  38. 38. OK, with those big eyes, she looks so pathetic when she does this. Its like a kitten that rolls over onto its back and looks atyou with those big kitten eyes, and maybe meows a little...And then mauls your hand when you go to rub its tummy.DO NOT RUB ITS TUMMY.
  39. 39. Yeah, like Cypress needed HELP getting that ego even bigger.Do I wish I hadnt set her gender preference? Yes. Yes I do.
  40. 40. Oh, if SimNerd werent skilling right now, I SO know who would be the latest fodder for the crazies.
  41. 41. Cypress maxes Creativity. Hahaha, SimNerd has more maxed skills than any of the inmates now, neener neener neener!
  42. 42. Cypress heads to the kitchen for a bite to eat, but Vee stops him first. Thanks, guys, SimNerd just finished caffeinating andnow she has to pee, but thats gonna get queuestomped for Watch Fight three times before she makes it to the bathroom.
  43. 43. Vee wins.However, Cypress was not going to take that lying down.
  44. 44. And he immediately picks another fight with Vee.
  45. 45. Which he wins. At this point, its 9-3 in Cypresss favor.
  46. 46. Meanwhile, SimNerd maxes Body!Four down, just the book skills left, and shes already got a fair amount of Mechanical and Cooking, and shes on Level 10 ofCleaning as well.The big question is: Can she hit those last Level 10s before its time for the birthdays? Less than two days before its time tocrustify. Ill turn aging off first, but Id rather get away clean.
  47. 47. Kirstial: "So, Gaius?"Salahuddin: "Emperor Idioticus? What about him?"Kirstial: "Gosh, I dont know if I should tell you since Cecils here!"Cecil: "No, please do continue, Ms. Legacina."
  48. 48. Kirstial: "He peed himself this one time! And there wasnt even anyone on the toilet!"Salahuddin: "...That doesnt surprise me one bit."Cecil: "It was a most regrettable incident."
  49. 49. Kirstial: "And hes totally hand-tilty!"Salahuddin: "I know, right?"Cecil: "Though your precise meaning is unclear to me, I believe the general idea is not incorrect."
  50. 50. Gaius: "I smell bad and Im hungry!"So what does he do?
  51. 51. Yall, I could not make this up if I tried.If he dies, Im not even going to TRY to Plead for his life.
  52. 52. Cypress: "Bloo skavani! Thats a full-looking skill meter youve got there!"
  53. 53. Yes. Yes it was. Cleanings maxed, just two left!
  54. 54. OK, CYPRESS can make himself a grilled cheese sandwich; whats Gaiuss problem?Oh, right--HES GAIUS.
  55. 55. Cypress: "Yeah, handcuffs are good. But spatulas and sexy lamps are also entertaining."Cecil: "I am unsure where this conversation is headed, but I am almost certain it will make me uncomfortable."Cypress: "Yup."These two Hang Out a lot. I wouldnt have thought that cold, bloodless, non-monologing Cecil would bond so well with Eeevil,angry, loves-to-threaten Cypress.
  56. 56. BOOM. Mechanicals done.Right after this, someone clogs the toilet. Not gonna fix it now, since theres no benefit to it. Who clogs it?Three guesses.Yup--Gaius.
  57. 57. SimNerd: "Kirstial! Red Hands! Fun and Social boost for that last skill point!"Kirstial: "One left and then what?"SimNerd: "Then Im getting the hell out of here!"Kirstial: "What about us?"SimNerd: "Dont care! I have just over 20 hours to max Cooking before we all go gray, so lets make this quick, mmmkay?"
  58. 58. This is SimNerds third Best Friend in the house--Cypress and Cecil are the other two. She has five total--Sally and Larch arethe only household friends.
  59. 59. BOOYAH!SimNerd maxes Cooking with 8 hours left to go!I just had a Sim Max 7 Skills without the use of Thinking Caps, Energizers, or the Education Bookshelf--only the Fall skillingboost.I am never EVER doing that again EVER.
  60. 60. Cypress: "Hey! How come YOU get to be Permaplat?"SimNerd: "Shut your piehole, Cy, Mamas got a Batbox coming! And 177,000 worth of Elixer of Life!"
  61. 61. SimNerd: "I maxed em!"You did.SimNerd: "Now pump me full of Elixer already!"
  62. 62. Gaius: "Who left this perfectly good platter of grilled cheese sandwiches out on the lawn?"Mehehehehe...
  63. 63. ZOTZHehehehehehehehehe!!!Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!*snerk**giggle**MOAR giggle*
  64. 64. SimNerd: "I wanna do it again!"Me too.*maxmotives*
  65. 65. ZOTZTeehee!*maxmotives*
  66. 66. ZOTZYou know what? STILL FUNNY.
  67. 67. Cypress: "So, youre a Permaplat female Knowledge Sim and Im a sexy Eeevil male Knowledge Sim... What say you takeme with you?"SimNerd: "Not just no, but HELL NO. Im outta here, and youre staying right where you are!"Well, we start out with 100 points, and subtract one for each day in the Asylum, which is 29, so thats 71, plus 20 for neverusing Influence, plus a whopping two for household friends gives me 93...
  68. 68. ...but I get one point for each skill point the inmates have:Gaius has 33, with maxed Body and LogicKirstial has 24, with maxed CreativitySalahuddin has 30, with maxed LogicUranium has 35, with maxed LogicVee has 26, with maxed CreativityCecil has 30Cypress has 35, with maxed Logic and Creativity...which brings the subtotal up to 306...
  69. 69. ...and I get one point for each 1000 Aspiration points the inmates have:Gaius has 18,500Kirstial has 41,000Salahuddin has 34,650Uranium has 19,500Vee has 10,650Cecil has 4,000 (that is not a typo)Cypress has 40,000That gives me another 168 points, for a grand total of 474.
  70. 70. And, of course, there are things that I dont gain or lose points for:Three Aspiration Failures--one for Salahuddin, two for Cypress.Seventeen total chats with the volleyball for Cypress over the course of his Aspiration Failures.Amazingly enough, there were NO other instances of Aspiration Failure or Aspiration Desperation, even on the parts of theFortune Sims, after having been in the Asylum for 29 days. There was plenty of Worrying, but no can-begging, cardboard-sandwich nibbling, or dancing with Moppy McPlateface.The fights (33 in all):Uranium and Kirstial fought 16 times--Uranium 13, Kirstial 3Vee and Larch fought once--Larch wonVee and Cecil fought 4 times--Cecil won all 4Vee and Cypress fought 12 times--Cypress 9, Vee 3
  71. 71. I gave the Asylum a bit of a makeover and made it liveable for the crazies. Why? Im feeling generous.I also got the individualroofslopeangle cheat to work properly. Yay!
  72. 72. Cecil: "I feel much more like myself now than I have in the last month. The addition of a fish tank is most welcome."Turns out that Cecils LTW is to have 6 pets reach the top of their careers, which is what his original LTW was in SqueakyClean as well. Once I bought a bunch of useless, expensive crap, he and Vee went platinum and I pumped them full of Elixer.
  73. 73. Vee: "Um... Cypress? I... Uh... Salahuddin, you wanna take this one?"Salahuddin: "For crying out loud, man, we have proper clothes now! Look at me! Im a sexy pirate! And Vees a witchy gothprincess! And Uraniums... an evil Romance alien! Whats your problem?"Vees LTW is to be a Hall of Famer.Salahuddins LTW is to be a Criminal Mastermind. I could have put him in the suit that goes with the top hat, but I decided togo with the latter-day Salahuddin instead. Minus the vampire-ness.
  74. 74. Cypess: "What can I say? I hung around in my underpants LONG before I got here! Gosh, I cant remember ever going toclass in real clothes when I was in college! Nope, it was pajamas and underwear all the time!"Cypresss LTW is to be Education Minister, which was his second LTW in the Vetinari Dualegacy before the rebuild, and hisbrother Larchs original LTW.
  75. 75. Uranium: "I like them. The skulls are amusing, plus theyre easy to rip off with my teeth."Vee: "Eeeewww."Uraniums LTW is to be a Professional Party Guest. If youve downloaded her and the skirt didnt come through properly, go tomodthesims2 and do a search on "military coup." You can snag the mesh and the texture and get the "official" UraniumApocalypso outfit.
  76. 76. Cypress: "...And Im changing..."
  77. 77. Gaius: "Hey, whats this thing?"Gaiuss LTW is... have 6 pets reach the top of their careers.*headdesk*He cant even do a LTW right. Used the Batbox to re-roll his LTW, and now he wants to Eat 200 Grilled Cheese Sandwicheslike he should.
  78. 78. Cecil: "Now that the household has expensive items and I have my fish, I find myself quite content."Kirstial: "Im just glad I got my magic back now! But I dont hate Uranium anymore, and now I dont really have anyone to useit against."Kirstials LTW is to reach the top of Gamer.
  79. 79. Cypress: "Ey wadabadee, everybody! Who wants to do some Eeevil?"Uranium: "As long as I get some WooHoo out of it, Im game."Vee: "Yeah, me too."Salahuddin: "Im in the mood to kick some ass."Kirstial: "Arent we pretty much all in the mood for creating chaos all the time?"Cecil: "I find that well-thought-out plans trump hasty action."
  80. 80. Gaius: "You know, its unfair. Ive killed more people than all of them combined, and I get excluded from their little Eeevilconclave."Thats because youre a complete idiot.But enough with the crazies! SimNerds outta here, and shes Permaplat, and you know what that means!
  81. 81. Crazy SimSelf Celebrate SimNerds Permaplat/Asylum Survival Party!On the left is MichelleFobbs (boolprop)/MichaelFobbs (Exchange), writer of the Planetary Apocalypse.In the middle is Stacilee/stacierearden, writer of Whedonberry.On the right is Dicreasy, writer of the Victorian Legacy.
  82. 82. The ones who seem to be most in sync are Larch and Professorbutters (who gave the world Cecil).Yes, I know Larch is not a SimSelf, but I miss playing him, so he gets an automatic invite to all of this stuff, because he isLarch and Larch is awesome. If you want to know why Larch is possibly my favorite Sim ever, check out my VetinariDualegacy, available on DrSupremeNerds SimPage or the forums.
  83. 83. Pen: "You DIDNT."I didnt. You helped yourself to a plate of something green and buzzy during one of your trips to the Asylum.Pen: "I dont believe you."Hey, you and Salahuddin werent THAT close!Penguingirl writes the Penguino Legacy. I promise youre not pregnant, Pen!
  84. 84. SimNerd may be a shameless heart-farter, but she makes great faces!
  85. 85. Cmon, tell me thats not a great face.SimNerd: "Im Permaplat! WOOOOO! And nobody died!"
  86. 86. SimNerd: "Wheee! Party!"Stacielee: "Youre not going to throw any of us into that Asylum, are you?"SimNerd: "Oh, I think were done with Asylums for a while! With my luck, Id end up rolling Max 7 Skills again!"
  87. 87. Pen: "Yay! Blites finally playing with me instead of making grouchyface!"Blite: "Well, you keep trying to touch me..."Orikes: "Pens seriously not pregnant, right?"Food poisoning! Blite ate the green omelet and dodged the bullet--Pen didnt!Blite created Gaius; Orikes created Kirstial.
  88. 88. SimNerd: "I dont have to live with the crazy evil people anymore! Wheee!"
  89. 89. SimNerd: "Dirty Joke! World!" *buttwiggle*Stacielee: "You just like shaking your ass, dont you?"SimNerd: "Hey, I spent a month with a bunch of villains, I get to cut loose now!"
  90. 90. *GASP* GIN! That looks like a flirt! You are flirting with Larch!Keep in mind that I do not have ACR.Gin: "Well, Spider Jerusalems not in Strangetown."GintasticNecat writes the Science of a Legacy and created Vee.
  91. 91. Toast: "Blah blah blah, insert crack about Toast being a lush here."Nope--had one drink, then headed for the poker table.Blite: "Where are the hot spares? Its not a party without hot spares!"EphemeralToast is the Simmer responsible for Uranium.
  92. 92. Gin: "Backrub?"Larch: "Mrrrooowww, Family/Knowledge Insta-bolts!"
  93. 93. Gin! Keep those hands above the waist!That is a truly disturbing smile he has going there.
  94. 94. Larch: "Woo schmatta, booze!"Toast: "And they say IM obsessed."
  95. 95. Marina: "Hey, whyd everybody stop Smustling?"Smoothiequeen writes the Villainous Apocalypse and completed the Fitzhugh Legacy.
  96. 96. Larch: "Bloo bagoo! Family Sim and Knowledge Sim--who wants a piece of this?"Prof: "Im still a little miffed that you made Uranium heart-fart me."Di: "And if I wouldnt hook up with you in Spider Jerusalems Bachelor Challenge, what makes you think Id do it here?"
  97. 97. Toast: "So I guess that five and the two in my hand didnt help, huh?"Blite: "My six and ten didnt fly either."Orikes: "Who dealt this crap?"Pen: "Thanks, Toast! Now I can afford to, oh, I dont know, BUY A CRIB FOR MY HELLSPAWN."Youre not pregnant! I swear! Its food poisoning! Thats what you get for eating when Gaius has been in the kitchen!
  98. 98. SimNerd: "Ah yes. Another crazy SimSelf bash complete! And Im Permaplat! With a Legacy-certified Impossible Want that Iachieved with no Rewards! Plus--three Aspiration Failures in an Asylum that lasted an entire Adult lifespan, containing twoFortune Sims, a Romance Sim, and an idiot Grilled Cheese Sim--and none of those four ever lost it? Thats gotta be somesort of record or something! This drink is well-deserved, if I do say so myself! Slainte, everybody!"Yup, thats it for DrSupremeNerds Home for Unrepentant Sociopaths! Hope you enjoyed it! The SimSelves featured havewritten some of my favorite Legacies; check them out, or head over to for all the Legacies and Sim storiesyoull ever need!-------------------------->
  99. 99. Gaius: "Whoa..."