One of the reasons we have multiple concurrent partners is that wemay be involved in long-distance relationships, and we f...
Communicate regularly and in a meaningful wayKeeping in touch with your partner will take some effort and money,but it hel...
Remember to value your relationship. Think of your loved onewhenever you feel tempted to have sex with other people. You c...
So, you or your girlfriend is relocating to another city for school or anew job, and you two are debating about whether yo...
Make an effort to visit one another as often as possible, not onlywhen it is expected, such as for holidays. Make sure tha...
5 Problems With Long Distance Relationships84rate or flagBy Isabella SnowAds by GoogleLong distance dating is manageable i...
breaking promises and failing to communicate the why of it.Naturally, this doesnt mean that your partner is lying, but if ...
by. And, sadly, sometimes they are.Taking things to the next level can be difficult.If you see each other every day, sleep...
Long distance relationship
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Long distance relationship

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Long distance relationship

  1. 1. One of the reasons we have multiple concurrent partners is that wemay be involved in long-distance relationships, and we feel unable tospend the time of separation alone without a partner.However, having multiple concurrent partners puts us at risk ofgetting HIV, regardless of the reasons. In view of this, it is a healthierchoice to have one love and be faithful to that partner, even if therelationship is long-distance.Here are some tips to help your long-distance relationship surviveand thrive:Have trust and honestyYou need trust and honesty to keep any relationship strong,especially a long- distance one. If you do not trust your partner, youwill probably spend a lot of time worrying if he or she is being faithfulto you.If you do not trust your partner, speak to him or her about yourworries.Be honest with your partner. This means sharing your thoughts andfeelings with him or her, even if those feelings are difficult orupsetting.Enjoy your personal spaceBeing alone for a while is good. It allows you to spend more timewith yourself and on things that you enjoy.Get to know each other differentlyWhen you and your partner are not together, you cannot have sexwith each other. But you can spend more time talking to each otherand getting to know each other in new ways.
  2. 2. Communicate regularly and in a meaningful wayKeeping in touch with your partner will take some effort and money,but it helps to keep your relationship alive. You can communicate inmany different ways:Phone each other as often as you can.If you cannot phone, send an SMS to let your partner know you arethinking of him or her.Write love letters and poems to your partner. Writing to each othercan bring some romance back into the relationship.Request/dedicate songs for each other on a radio station that youboth listen to.Make time to visit each other. This may sometimes be difficultbecause of work, money or children, but make the time to see eachother during the separation.Talk about your fearsYou might worry if your partner is being faithful to you. If thishappens, think about the good things you did together as a couple.Listen to your partner’s favourite music or think about your lastconversation together. If you are really worried, then talk to yourpartner about it.Talk to friends you trustThis is a good way to remind yourself and others that your partner isa big part of your life, even though he or she is far away.Sex and physical contactThis can be the most difficult part of a long-distance relationship.
  3. 3. Remember to value your relationship. Think of your loved onewhenever you feel tempted to have sex with other people. You canalso pleasure yourself with masturbation.Remember your commitmentBeing away from your partner will help you to remember all thegood things about being around him or her. Listen to music you bothlove or put up reminders of your beloved, like his or her photograph.This can make your relationship stronger.During the difficulties of a long-distance relationship, remember whyyou made the decision to stay faithful to your partner. Rememberthat you will not always be apart. Look forward to the time when youwill be together again.
  4. 4. So, you or your girlfriend is relocating to another city for school or anew job, and you two are debating about whether you should breakup, or try having a long-distance relationship.Forgive my bluntness, but dont even think about going through witha long-distance relationship unless you are both extremely devotedto one another, and willing to make sacrifices for the relationship. Ifthis doesnt sound like you, then you should cut your losses now, andavoid a potentially heart-wrenching situation in the future.If, on the other hand, you are both ready and willing to handle arelationship from afar, then be sure to read on for someindispensable tips -- if I do say so myself -- on how to make it work.make timeOf course, relocating to a new city will involve meeting new peopleand doing new things, but that doesnt mean that your significantother should fall to the bottom of your list of priorities.It is important to set aside time every day to phone or e-mail eachother, without any distractions. Tell each other details about yourday, your friends, co-workers, etc., so that you both feel a part of theother persons life; this seemingly small step will go a long way inreducing the distance between the two of you.visit
  5. 5. Make an effort to visit one another as often as possible, not onlywhen it is expected, such as for holidays. Make sure that it isntalways the same person who is going out of their way for the other,because this will inevitably lead to some serious resentment.If you dont put in the time and effort to see one another, then youwill eventually drift apart, no matter how strong your love is. Afterall, you need some physical contact to keep a relationship going.plan aheadBe sure to organize your schedule so that when she does come tovisit, you have nothing to do but spend quality time with her. Tellyour friends and family that you are officially unavailable during thetime that you and your sweetie plan on being together.This will not only be enjoyable in itself, but it will also make her feellike her efforts were appreciated, and that she is truly loved.
  6. 6. 5 Problems With Long Distance Relationships84rate or flagBy Isabella SnowAds by GoogleLong distance dating is manageable if youve got the right mentalityfor it, but it can still have its ups and downs, regardless of how strongyou and your partner may be. I have been in several long distancerelationships, my first being at 19 years of age when I moved halfwayacross the country. This proved to be rather a foolish arrangementand it ended quickly enough; so foolish, in fact, that it would beanother decade before Id get involved in another one. But getinvolved, I did. That one didnt work either, so I tried it again. Andagain.And again. And I have just recently seen the end of what I havedecided will be the last long distance relationship I will involve myselfwith. Im simply not the type who can deal with the issues that ariseduring long distance relationships. Read on to see what those issuesare, and how surmountable you yourself find them to be.Its so easy to lie.Whether or not your partner actually is lying is irrelevant. The simpletruth of the matter is that you will have to take them at their wordevery step of the way -- or go mad wondering why theyre constantly
  7. 7. breaking promises and failing to communicate the why of it.Naturally, this doesnt mean that your partner is lying, but if theyreflaky by nature, repeated behaviors can lead to suspicion, which cantake its toll on trust. Which brings us to the next point.Trust is only as strong as you imagine it to be.Trust is easy enough in the beginning, but over time innocent (andperhaps not so innocent) mistakes on the part of your man, orwoman, can really affect your resolve to keep doubts at bay. Forexample, if your man promises to call you at a certain time on acertain day, but doesnt actually contact you for another three, this isbound to affect you twofold: First, youll be worried that somethinghappened to him. Second, when you later learn that hes perfectly okand simply decided to go out to dinner with a mate instead, and thensomehow forgot to contact you for whatever reason until thefollowing week... well, you can see how that might inspire a lack oftrust. Sadly, its impossible to know whether or not the mistake wasinnocent, which will add yet another strain to an already difficultsituation.Pent up energies.Yes, that kind. While there are many ways around the misery of notbeing able to expression ones affection physically, some peoplesimply arent comfortable with attempting this over the phone, incyberspace, or by video chat. If you are comfy with it, more power toyou -- but if its too "out there" for you, this can take its toll as well,whether youre male or female. That, and it could make one of youworry that the other is seeking consolation elsewhere to get them
  8. 8. by. And, sadly, sometimes they are.Taking things to the next level can be difficult.If you see each other every day, sleep over every few days, havebreakfast in bed together, etc., these things put you on the naturalcourse to the next step, which could be one of you moving to theothers area, or something bigger, like actually moving in together.But when you only get to see each other once or twice a month, thiscan make the rational mind stand up and say, "whoa, wait... youhardly know this person..." even if youve been in a long distancerelationship for more than a year. Which leads me to the next, andperhaps biggest, issue.Sometimes you really *dont* know them at all.People lie. A lot of people seeking attention that theyre not gettingin their own marriage will go online, create a fake id and romance aninnocent person who takes them at face value. Sometimes thiscontinues to the point of long distance travel and proposals ofmarriage. Sometimes it even results in bigamy; Ive seen it. So howdo you know that the man youre in a committed long distancerelationship with, the one who flies to see you every other weekend,isnt really married with five kids, and telling his wife that these arebusiness trips? Thats just it -- you dont. Not until you actually startliving together and can see for yourself that he hasnt brought a wifeand kids along with him. Whether or not you can endure everythingelse until you get to that point is another matter altogether and Ivegreat respect for anyone who can.

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