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Dealing with Difficult Blog Comments

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Dealing with Difficult Blog Comments

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A short presentation by David Eaves at Northern Voice on what negotiation theory can teach us about managing difficult commentators.

A short presentation by David Eaves at Northern Voice on what negotiation theory can teach us about managing difficult commentators.

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Dealing with Difficult Blog Comments

  1. 1. dealing with difficult people
  2. 2. dealing with difficult people
  3. 3. fellow negotiator policy geek blogger
  4. 4. my point: have a goal three challenges be a model
  5. 5. <ul><li><1> </li></ul>
  6. 6. <ul><li>goal? </li></ul>
  7. 7. <ul><li>become an expert? </li></ul><ul><li>make friends? </li></ul><ul><li>gain insight? </li></ul><ul><li>share ideas? </li></ul><ul><li>market yourself? </li></ul>
  8. 8. <ul><li>become an expert? </li></ul><ul><li>make friends? </li></ul><ul><li>gain insight? </li></ul><ul><li>community </li></ul><ul><li>share ideas? </li></ul><ul><li>market yourself? </li></ul>
  9. 9. <ul><li><any?> </li></ul><ul><li>community </li></ul>
  10. 10. <ul><li>fun </li></ul><ul><li>engaged </li></ul><ul><li>active </li></ul><ul><li>forgiving </li></ul><ul><li>interesting </li></ul>
  11. 11. <ul><li>fun </li></ul><ul><li>engaged </li></ul><ul><li>active </li></ul><ul><li>forgiving </li></ul><ul><li>interesting </li></ul>
  12. 12. <ul><li>and… </li></ul>
  13. 13. <ul><li>our goal? </li></ul>© 2003 The New Yorker Collection from cartoonbank.com. All Rights Reserved.
  14. 14. <ul><li>it is not enough that I am right </li></ul><ul><li>they must also be wrong </li></ul>
  15. 15. <ul><li><2> </li></ul>
  16. 16. <ul><li>weak relationships </li></ul><ul><li>+ </li></ul><ul><li>blunt communication mediums </li></ul>
  17. 17. <ul><li>weak relationships </li></ul><ul><li>+ </li></ul><ul><li>blunt communication mediums </li></ul><ul><li>= </li></ul><ul><li>dangerous assumptions </li></ul>
  18. 18. <ul><li>example </li></ul>
  19. 19. <ul><li>I didn’t say you were stupid </li></ul>
  20. 20. <ul><li>I didn’t say you were stupid </li></ul>
  21. 21. <ul><li>I didn’t say you were stupid </li></ul>
  22. 22. <ul><li>I didn’t say you were stupid </li></ul>
  23. 23. <ul><li>I didn’t say you were stupid  </li></ul>
  24. 24. <ul><li>dangerous assumptions </li></ul>
  25. 25. <ul><ul><li>I have the relevant information </li></ul></ul>
  26. 26. <ul><ul><li>I have the relevant information </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>If they knew what I knew, they’d think differently </li></ul></ul>
  27. 27. <ul><ul><li>I have the relevant information </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>If they knew what I knew, they’d think differently </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>They’re probably crazy, stupid or evil (or all of the above) </li></ul></ul>
  28. 28. <ul><li><3> </li></ul>
  29. 29. <ul><li>model behaviour </li></ul>
  30. 30. <ul><li>influence your community </li></ul>
  31. 31. <ul><li>WHAT WE CONTROL: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>how we behave </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>how we allow </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>others to affect </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>our behaviour </li></ul></ul>
  32. 32. <ul><li>WHAT WE CONTROL: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>how we behave </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>how we allow </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>others to affect </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>our behaviour </li></ul></ul><ul><li>WHAT WE INFLUENCE: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>others behaviour </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>our relationship </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>the results </li></ul></ul>
  33. 33. <ul><li>be curious </li></ul>
  34. 34. SHARE ASK SHARE ASK SHARE ASK My Conclusions My Interpretations Their Interpretations Data I noticed Data they noticed DATA POOL Their Conclusions From Argyris & Schon Courtesy of Common Outlook Consulting
  35. 35. <ul><li>considered response </li></ul>
  36. 36. <ul><li>Inquire: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Asking questions to learn information </li></ul></ul><ul><li>Acknowledge: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Of their view or feelings (without agreeing, per se) </li></ul></ul><ul><li>Advocate: </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Explaining your point of view </li></ul></ul>
  37. 37. <ul><li>set rules </li></ul>
  38. 38. <ul><li>key thoughts </li></ul><ul><li>1. you are the leader of your community </li></ul>
  39. 39. <ul><li>key thoughts </li></ul><ul><li>2. shape your posts </li></ul>
  40. 40. <ul><li>key thoughts </li></ul><ul><li>3. consider your reaction </li></ul>
  41. 41. <ul><li>key thoughts </li></ul><ul><li>4. don’t be afraid delete </li></ul>
  42. 42. <ul><li>key thoughts </li></ul><ul><li>5. remember you too are a difficult person </li></ul>
  43. 43. David Eaves david@eaves.ca www.eaves.ca This work is copyrighted using Creative Commons Attribution 2.5 You may share and remix this work on the condition that you attribute the work to its original author.

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