Session 7: X3pure Men’s Series
Going Sober
Going Sober
Going Sober
  • We need to stop using the object of our
   addiction
Going Sober
Going Sober
  • Self-Differentiation
Going Sober
  • Self-Differentiation
   - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of
   people ...
Going Sober
  • Self-Differentiation
   - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of
   people ...
Going Sober
  • Self-Differentiation
   - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of
   people ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the
   Real Change side of recovery, if ...
Zander’s Testimony
Zander’s Testimony
  • Zander realized, for the first time, that his
   behavior with sex, pornography and alcohol
   had v...
Zander’s Testimony
Zander’s Testimony
  • The only way Zander was able to begin to
   start seeing the realities of his addiction and
   why ...
Zander’s Testimony
  • The only way Zander was able to begin to
   start seeing the realities of his addiction and
   why ...
Assignment
Assignment
  • Gather all the porn you still have access to
   and break it, shred it and burn it
Assignment
  • Gather all the porn you still have access to
   and break it, shred it and burn it

  • Do it today
Assignment
  • Gather all the porn you still have access to
   and break it, shred it and burn it

  • Do it today

  • Li...
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X3 pure men's chapt 7a

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X3 pure men's chapt 7a

  1. 1. Session 7: X3pure Men’s Series Going Sober
  2. 2. Going Sober
  3. 3. Going Sober • We need to stop using the object of our addiction
  4. 4. Going Sober
  5. 5. Going Sober • Self-Differentiation
  6. 6. Going Sober • Self-Differentiation - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of people in your life who love you conditionally, which means that they don’t just love you for who you are (warts and all), but love you only if you act or behave in a certain way.
  7. 7. Going Sober • Self-Differentiation - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of people in your life who love you conditionally, which means that they don’t just love you for who you are (warts and all), but love you only if you act or behave in a certain way. - It is this concept of self-differentiation that is at the core of sexual addiction: an ability to remain in relationship with other people while remaining an individual with individual needs and desires without the need to act out sexually.
  8. 8. Going Sober • Self-Differentiation - An ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of people in your life who love you conditionally, which means that they don’t just love you for who you are (warts and all), but love you only if you act or behave in a certain way. - It is this concept of self-differentiation that is at the core of sexual addiction: an ability to remain in relationship with other people while remaining an individual with individual needs and desires without the need to act out sexually. - Dealing with and managing the realities of those events and the people who did them to you may be more than you are capable of doing on your own.
  9. 9. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery
  10. 10. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love.
  11. 11. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes...
  12. 12. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes... - Time
  13. 13. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes... - Time - Effort
  14. 14. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes... - Time - Effort - Reflection
  15. 15. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes... - Time - Effort - Reflection - Working with other people
  16. 16. Key to Sexual Addiction Recovery • You’re never going to get to the reality, or the Real Change side of recovery, if you don’t go sober and begin to touch, feel, and face the areas in your life where you received, or are receiving, conditional love and then start the process of creating new places in your life where there is unconditional love. • This takes... - Time - Effort - Reflection - Working with other people - Trusting other people
  17. 17. Zander’s Testimony
  18. 18. Zander’s Testimony • Zander realized, for the first time, that his behavior with sex, pornography and alcohol had very little to do with sex, pornography, and alcohol, but instead had everything to do with the conditional love he experienced, and was still experiencing, with his father.
  19. 19. Zander’s Testimony
  20. 20. Zander’s Testimony • The only way Zander was able to begin to start seeing the realities of his addiction and why he was acting out sexually was by going sober first.
  21. 21. Zander’s Testimony • The only way Zander was able to begin to start seeing the realities of his addiction and why he was acting out sexually was by going sober first. • In going sober, Zander was forced to face the real cause of his addiction with sex, porn, and alcohol.
  22. 22. Assignment
  23. 23. Assignment • Gather all the porn you still have access to and break it, shred it and burn it
  24. 24. Assignment • Gather all the porn you still have access to and break it, shred it and burn it • Do it today
  25. 25. Assignment • Gather all the porn you still have access to and break it, shred it and burn it • Do it today • List reasons why you want to go sober

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