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Self Esteem issues in coaching


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A tour of the principle perspectives on \'self-esteem\' and how they might be useful to a coach

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Self Esteem issues in coaching

  1. 1. Self esteem issues incoaching relationshipsPresentation to Oxford Brookes Coaching &Mentoring Society, November 2010Alison MaxwellCoach, team coach, coach supervisorMA MA AC
  2. 2. Session overview  Defining terms  The Theorists  Informing practiceUntangle and Grow
  3. 3. Defining Terms “Self-esteem is the reputation we acquire with ourselves” Nathaniel BrandonUntangle and Grow
  4. 4. Why should we be interested?  Self esteem associated with :  Confidence  Less conformity  Self-efficacy  Optimism  Risk taking  Creativity  Etc.  Common theme in coaching?  A determinant of coaching success?  A happy by-product of successful coaching?Untangle and Grow
  5. 5. The Theorists: Ratio, James (1890)  Self-esteem as “contingent on the ratio of our successes to our failures in domains of our life we deem important”Untangle and Grow
  6. 6. The Theorists: Social Constructionists eg Cooley (1909), Mead (1913)  A comparison with an internalised set of standards or values introjected from familial, social and cultural interactions/contexts.Untangle and Grow
  7. 7. The Theorists: Humanists eg. Maslow (1954), Rogers (1951)  Self-esteem as central to human functioning - congruence with own needs/values/ standards  Contingent when dependent on external approval of othersUntangle and Grow
  8. 8. The Theorists: self conception e.g. Baumeister (1993)  Self Consistency - drive to confirm what we already believe about ourselves (good or bad) versus  Self Enhancement – drive to perceive ourselves in a positive lightUntangle and Grow
  9. 9. The Theorists: stability e.g. Kernis (2003)Untangle and Grow
  10. 10. The Theorists: authentic self-esteem e.g. Ryan & Brown (2003) “Non-contingent self-esteem characterises persons for whom the issue of self-esteem is not salient, largely because they experience themselves on a fundamental level as worthy of esteem and love. Successes and failures do not implicate their self-worth, even when they lead to a re-evaluation of actions and efforts” Ryan & Warren Brown (2003, p72)Untangle and Grow
  11. 11. The Theorists: Worthiness & Competence e.g Mruk (2006)  Worthiness based esteem – masking a perceived lack of competence  Competence based esteem – masking a sense of lack of worthinessUntangle and Grow
  12. 12. Adapted Mruk Model High Perceived Worthiness Worthiness High stable based SE SE Low Perceived High Perceived Competence Competence Low stable Competence SE based SE Low Perceived WorthinessUntangle and Grow
  13. 13. Using theory to inform coaching?  For each of the „cases‟ what sort of self-esteem issue do you think is present?  How would you test this?  What would your coaching strategy be?Untangle and Grow
  14. 14. Enhancing low self esteem  Cognitive restructuring/ pattern breaking techniques  Strengths based approaches  Seeking out positive feedback  Unconditional positive regard  Personal audit  Challenging domain relevance  Setting realistic goals or personal expectations  Competence recollection  Problem solving skills  Graded experimentUntangle and Grow
  15. 15. Challenging over-esteem  Multi-source feedback  Realism checks  360 data  Impact on significant others  Impact on desired future  In the moment feedback  Focus on creating a trusting relationshipUntangle and Grow
  16. 16. The developmental perspective e.g Kegan • Authentic self-esteem • Non-contingent self- esteem • Self–enhancement/ self- consistency • Congruence with own needs or values • Ratio of success to failure • Comparison with others • Comparison with social norms or expectationsUntangle and Grow
  17. 17. Self esteem issues in the relationship? Worthiness High stable Worthiness High stable based SE SE based SE SE Low stable Competence Low stable Competence SE based SE SE based SEUntangle and Grow
  18. 18. For more information Contact Alison Maxwell at:  Email:  Web:  Phone: 01780-480287 Workshops for developing coaches are available on request:  Self-esteem issues in coaching  Boundary between coaching and therapy  Developmental coachingUntangle and Grow