What’s Love got to do with it? Maximizing your communications with clients
Harvard Retention Study <ul><li>Listening </li></ul><ul><li>Actively participate </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Take notes </li></u...
A Word About Typo’s Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch stduy at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers i...
What’s Love got to do with it? Maximizing your communications with clients You have to love yourself Care Deeply for other...
Commitments for Tonight <ul><li>Have fun </li></ul><ul><li>Stretch yourself </li></ul><ul><li>Play full-out </li></ul><ul>...
How’s Your Energy Level? -Exercise- Around the room
What is Communication? How do we Communicate initially? How do you impart your thoughts  on others? The imparting or inter...
Face-to-Face Communications <ul><li>Words </li></ul><ul><li>Voice qualities </li></ul><ul><li>Physiology-Body Language </l...
WORDS <ul><li>Little or no meaning </li></ul><ul><li>Need help </li></ul>
WORDS <ul><li>“You look nice, Erika” </li></ul><ul><li>“Erika, you’re so incredibly gorgeous.  Your hair is fabulous and t...
Voice Qualities <ul><li>Intonation </li></ul><ul><li>Inflection </li></ul>
INTONATION & INFLECTION You just won  an all-expenses-paid trip  to Hawaii for two.
Be Congruent <ul><li>What you Say Matches how you feel and what you are saying on the inside </li></ul><ul><li>People BELI...
BODY LANGUAGE <ul><li>Facial expression </li></ul><ul><li>Posture </li></ul><ul><li>Gesticulation </li></ul>
Different Personalities Types Communicate Differently <ul><li>Psychologically speaking </li></ul><ul><li>There are four gr...
I-Speak Your  Language Assessment by Thompson/DBM
<ul><li>SENSOR </li></ul><ul><li>FEELER </li></ul><ul><li>THINKER </li></ul><ul><li>INTUITOR </li></ul>
Four Dimensions of Observable Behavior <ul><li>Assertiveness  </li></ul><ul><li>Responsiveness </li></ul><ul><li>People </...
“ Tendency to express  Convictions with  Confidence or Force”  Assertiveness
Responsiveness “ Tendency to  show  emotions” R e s p o n s i v e n e s s
The “I-Speak” Model <ul><li>By Combining Scales  produces  4 Behavior Style Patterns </li></ul>
Behavior Styles Under Favorable Conditions People in In Their  “ Comfort Zone ” It also shows the shift
<ul><li>“ Social” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Strategist </li></ul><ul><li>Uninhibited </li></ul><ul><li>Future oriented...
“ SENSERS” <ul><li>“Control” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>All about action </li></ul><ul><li>Now - oriented </li></ul>R e...
“ Thinkers” <ul><li>“ Fact” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Very curious & cautious </li></ul><ul><li>Present,Past and Futur...
Feelers <ul><li>“ People” Specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Relationship & Security Conscious </li></ul><ul><li>“ You” Oriente...
(Closed) Low R e s p o n s i v e n e s s Assertiveness Low (Indirect) High (Direct) High (Open)
We Are All of These <ul><li>We have preferences </li></ul><ul><li>People like to be with others like themselves </li></ul>
What is your Preference? -Exercise- I-Speak Your Language
Rapport Building How Important Is It To:
How important is Rapport To: <ul><li>Influencing decision makers? </li></ul><ul><li>Managing people/teams? </li></ul><ul><...
Ways to Build Rapport With People <ul><li>1. Bring up mutual interest. (weather) </li></ul><ul><li>2. Give a gift. </li></...
Using Modalities to Build Rapport
Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Visual </li></ul><ul><li>Auditory </li></ul><ul><li>Kinesthetic </li></ul>
Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Visual </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Can you  Picture  this? </li></ul></ul></ul><ul...
Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Auditory </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I  Hear  You! </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul...
Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Kinesthetic </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>That  feels  good to me. </li></ul></ul></...
Other Components of Rapport <ul><li>Voice </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Pitch </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Pace </li></ul></ul><ul><...
Other Components of Rapport <ul><li>Physiology </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Posture </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Hand gestures </li...
Matching and Mirroring <ul><li>When people are like each other, they tend to like each other. </li></ul><ul><li>When peopl...
Matching and Mirroring -Exercise-
Pick A Partner <ul><li>3 questions: use matching and mirroring </li></ul><ul><li>Where did you grow up?  </li></ul><ul><li...
“ Before We Can Influence, We Must First Be Influenced”
What Are You Passionate About? -Exercise- Eyes/tension/stance/tone/sounds/gestures
Values Are “Emotional States” We Believe Are the Most Important for Us to Experience or Avoid!
Knowing Their Values <ul><li>How do you find peoples values? </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Ask 2 questions </li></ul></ul>
How Do You Find Peoples Values <ul><li>1. What’s most important to you in________? </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Business </li></u...
How Do You Know When Those Values Are Being Met? <ul><li>2. What has to happen in order for you to feel_______? </li></ul>
Example What’s most important to you in this position? Ans .:  Finding someone with the right skills. What has to happen i...
What does love have to do with it? Love Thyself/focus on Others Communicate  Using Their  Style Care Deeply for others-You...
Parting words <ul><li>Life is a journey  </li></ul><ul><li>Don’t achieve to be happy </li></ul><ul><li>Life is short </li>...
Shifting Your results from Good to Great.  Because even Michael Jordan gets distinctions from his coach
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Whats Love Got To Do With It Acpi 11 09 04

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How to maximize your communications with your clients

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  • Success in influencing comes down to three critical factors. #1 Learning from your mistakes and that means knowing how you operate and what your blind spots are. #2 Communicating effectively with others: I have a PhD from the School of hard Knocks Some people would call this business acumen or Business smarts also referred to as street smarts. What is important is that I am constantly learning and developing different outcomes. #3 how we communicate has an impact on how we do in life, business, relationships, school, and just about every facet of our lives. I will share with you how to communicate in the language that the person you are trying to influence will understand.
  • Whats Love Got To Do With It Acpi 11 09 04

    1. 1. What’s Love got to do with it? Maximizing your communications with clients
    2. 2. Harvard Retention Study <ul><li>Listening </li></ul><ul><li>Actively participate </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Take notes </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Ask questions </li></ul></ul><ul><li>Have FUN! </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><ul><li>“ Learning is remembering” -Socrates- </li></ul></ul></ul></ul>10%- 20 % 20%-80% 100%
    3. 3. A Word About Typo’s Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch stduy at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.  
    4. 4. What’s Love got to do with it? Maximizing your communications with clients You have to love yourself Care Deeply for others Communicate Effectively
    5. 5. Commitments for Tonight <ul><li>Have fun </li></ul><ul><li>Stretch yourself </li></ul><ul><li>Play full-out </li></ul><ul><li>Respect each other </li></ul><ul><li>Play team </li></ul>
    6. 6. How’s Your Energy Level? -Exercise- Around the room
    7. 7. What is Communication? How do we Communicate initially? How do you impart your thoughts on others? The imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions or information by speech, writing or signs (5. Feelings)
    8. 8. Face-to-Face Communications <ul><li>Words </li></ul><ul><li>Voice qualities </li></ul><ul><li>Physiology-Body Language </li></ul>7% 38% 55%
    9. 9. WORDS <ul><li>Little or no meaning </li></ul><ul><li>Need help </li></ul>
    10. 10. WORDS <ul><li>“You look nice, Erika” </li></ul><ul><li>“Erika, you’re so incredibly gorgeous. Your hair is fabulous and the color of your dress makes your eyes stand out like blue sapphires!” </li></ul>
    11. 11. Voice Qualities <ul><li>Intonation </li></ul><ul><li>Inflection </li></ul>
    12. 12. INTONATION & INFLECTION You just won an all-expenses-paid trip to Hawaii for two.
    13. 13. Be Congruent <ul><li>What you Say Matches how you feel and what you are saying on the inside </li></ul><ul><li>People BELIEVE You </li></ul><ul><li>The perception is that you are HONEST </li></ul>
    14. 14. BODY LANGUAGE <ul><li>Facial expression </li></ul><ul><li>Posture </li></ul><ul><li>Gesticulation </li></ul>
    15. 15. Different Personalities Types Communicate Differently <ul><li>Psychologically speaking </li></ul><ul><li>There are four groups </li></ul>Carl Jung’s Type Theory
    16. 16. I-Speak Your Language Assessment by Thompson/DBM
    17. 17. <ul><li>SENSOR </li></ul><ul><li>FEELER </li></ul><ul><li>THINKER </li></ul><ul><li>INTUITOR </li></ul>
    18. 18. Four Dimensions of Observable Behavior <ul><li>Assertiveness </li></ul><ul><li>Responsiveness </li></ul><ul><li>People </li></ul><ul><li>Tasks </li></ul>
    19. 19. “ Tendency to express Convictions with Confidence or Force” Assertiveness
    20. 20. Responsiveness “ Tendency to show emotions” R e s p o n s i v e n e s s
    21. 21. The “I-Speak” Model <ul><li>By Combining Scales produces 4 Behavior Style Patterns </li></ul>
    22. 22. Behavior Styles Under Favorable Conditions People in In Their “ Comfort Zone ” It also shows the shift
    23. 23. <ul><li>“ Social” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Strategist </li></ul><ul><li>Uninhibited </li></ul><ul><li>Future oriented </li></ul>“ INTUITORS” R e s p o n s i v e n e s s High (Direct) High (Open) Assertiveness
    24. 24. “ SENSERS” <ul><li>“Control” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>All about action </li></ul><ul><li>Now - oriented </li></ul>R e s p o n s i v e n e s s Assertiveness High Forcefulness Low (emotion )
    25. 25. “ Thinkers” <ul><li>“ Fact” specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Very curious & cautious </li></ul><ul><li>Present,Past and Future </li></ul><ul><li>Analyze Everything </li></ul>R e s p o n s i v e n e s s Assertiveness Low (Indirect) (emotional) Low
    26. 26. Feelers <ul><li>“ People” Specialists </li></ul><ul><li>Relationship & Security Conscious </li></ul><ul><li>“ You” Oriented </li></ul>R e s p o n s i v e n e s s Assertiveness Low ( Indirect ) High (emotion)
    27. 27. (Closed) Low R e s p o n s i v e n e s s Assertiveness Low (Indirect) High (Direct) High (Open)
    28. 28. We Are All of These <ul><li>We have preferences </li></ul><ul><li>People like to be with others like themselves </li></ul>
    29. 29. What is your Preference? -Exercise- I-Speak Your Language
    30. 30. Rapport Building How Important Is It To:
    31. 31. How important is Rapport To: <ul><li>Influencing decision makers? </li></ul><ul><li>Managing people/teams? </li></ul><ul><li>Leading/motivating workers? </li></ul><ul><li>Getting an interview? </li></ul><ul><li>Getting your clients to do as you say? </li></ul>
    32. 32. Ways to Build Rapport With People <ul><li>1. Bring up mutual interest. (weather) </li></ul><ul><li>2. Give a gift. </li></ul><ul><li>3. Give a referral. </li></ul><ul><li>4. Tell them a story. </li></ul><ul><li>5. Insult them! </li></ul><ul><li>6. Give them a sample of what’s coming. </li></ul><ul><li>7. Give them a compliment. </li></ul><ul><li>8. Make a startling statement. </li></ul><ul><li>9. Be of service. </li></ul><ul><li>10. Listen. </li></ul>
    33. 33. Using Modalities to Build Rapport
    34. 34. Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Visual </li></ul><ul><li>Auditory </li></ul><ul><li>Kinesthetic </li></ul>
    35. 35. Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Visual </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Can you Picture this? </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Let’s take a closer Look. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I See what you mean. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>That gives me a good Preview. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Can you Clarify that? </li></ul></ul></ul>
    36. 36. Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Auditory </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I Hear You! </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Sounds Good to me. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Let’s Talk more about that. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I’m in tune with that. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>That speaks to me. </li></ul></ul></ul>
    37. 37. Using Modalities to Build Rapport <ul><li>Kinesthetic </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>That feels good to me. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I cant’ get a handle on that. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>This is weighing on me heavily. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>I have got to get better grasp on this. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>This speech is making me uncomfortable. </li></ul></ul></ul>
    38. 38. Other Components of Rapport <ul><li>Voice </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Pitch </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Pace </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Tonality </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Accents </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Volume </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Vocabulary </li></ul></ul>
    39. 39. Other Components of Rapport <ul><li>Physiology </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Posture </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Hand gestures </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Proximity </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Touch </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Eye contact </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Breathing </li></ul></ul>
    40. 40. Matching and Mirroring <ul><li>When people are like each other, they tend to like each other. </li></ul><ul><li>When people are not like each other, they tend not to like each other. </li></ul>
    41. 41. Matching and Mirroring -Exercise-
    42. 42. Pick A Partner <ul><li>3 questions: use matching and mirroring </li></ul><ul><li>Where did you grow up? </li></ul><ul><li>What do you love about your job? </li></ul><ul><li>Something shocking about yourself? </li></ul>
    43. 43. “ Before We Can Influence, We Must First Be Influenced”
    44. 44. What Are You Passionate About? -Exercise- Eyes/tension/stance/tone/sounds/gestures
    45. 45. Values Are “Emotional States” We Believe Are the Most Important for Us to Experience or Avoid!
    46. 46. Knowing Their Values <ul><li>How do you find peoples values? </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Ask 2 questions </li></ul></ul>
    47. 47. How Do You Find Peoples Values <ul><li>1. What’s most important to you in________? </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Business </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Life </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>A relationships </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Your job </li></ul></ul>
    48. 48. How Do You Know When Those Values Are Being Met? <ul><li>2. What has to happen in order for you to feel_______? </li></ul>
    49. 49. Example What’s most important to you in this position? Ans .: Finding someone with the right skills. What has to happen in order for you to feel you are hiring someone with the “right skills”? Ans .: They have to be a good fit . I’m curious, what has to happen in order for you to know that they are a “good fit”? Ans .: They must be able to work autonomously with very little structure and meet the milestones as outlined in our strategic plan.
    50. 50. What does love have to do with it? Love Thyself/focus on Others Communicate Using Their Style Care Deeply for others-You will distinguish yourself from the pack
    51. 51. Parting words <ul><li>Life is a journey </li></ul><ul><li>Don’t achieve to be happy </li></ul><ul><li>Life is short </li></ul><ul><li>Practice continuous learning </li></ul><ul><li>Practice what you preach </li></ul><ul><li>Give more than you receive </li></ul>
    52. 52. Shifting Your results from Good to Great. Because even Michael Jordan gets distinctions from his coach

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