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WMS Spring Locker

  1. 1. The Locker The Wellesley Middle School Newspaper Spring 2010 So, What Happened AFTER the Health Care Bill Passed? Rishi The answer to that might not be as easy as you think. Since one of the proposed healthcare bills was signed into law by President Obama, ten Contents Congressmen who supported the bill have received death threats and/or Activity Pages damage to their houses and offices, eleven states have promised to try Comics to repeal the healthcare bill passed by Congress by deeming it News unconstitutional, the Democrats have been touting their successes Stories through a megaphone, and the GOP has been running around vowing to repeal the bill. While you might be surprised at first to hear things like Sports “The Locker” is produced by this (considering that usually Americans don’t resort to violence in current students at Wellesley politics), it doesn’t seem that surprising when you consider the number Middle School. Any WMS of misconceptions flying around about the bill, and the fact that that student who would like to contribute to future editions this is one of the biggest things to happen in American history since should listen to the Medicare and Social Security. As ridiculous as this cartoon might announcements for future seem, they really DO show what has happened in the six days after the meetings! Editors: Jonathan and healthcare bill was signed into law. Alice Assistant Editors: Bill, Noor, Stephanie, Yuto, and Haruki Faculty Advisor: Lynne Johnson http://list.cagle.com/etoon.aspx?cartoon=/news/HealthCareBillPasses/images/chappatte.jpg
  2. 2. Humans vs. Wolves: The Ancient As the war got worse, scientists decide to collect data from the time when wolves were gone, 1926-1995 to Battle Begins Again when they came back, 1995- present. Without wolves, Alice elk’s took over, trees never grew to their full size because elks ate the saplings, and coyote numbers Humans and wolves have been fighting for land and climbed and the smaller animals decreased from coyote food for as along as anyone can remember. In the last hunters. With wolves, aspen trees grew to 10-15 feet, decade, things had calmed down. But, as the wolf makes there were fewer coyote attacks, willows came back a strong come back to the US, things are getting ugly all strong, allowing natural water flow, beaver colonies over again and history is starting to repeat itself. grew, and carrion grew, feeding ravens, magpies, eagles, In the 1930’s gray wolves in the west were gone, from bears, and coyotes. So, who do you think has the home being hunted, trapped, and poisoned in their own homes, advantage? Humans or wolves? the wild. In 1974, wolves, or canis lupus were declared an endangered species in 48 states. The wolves’ Also who do you think deserves the right to live in the remaining population was taken to Minnesota and wild, and does killing an animal just because their trying Michigan near Lake Superior. Some six years later, to survive sound right you to? No, well I thought the wolves were seen crossing the continental divide, same thing. If ranchers don’t like wolves eating their heading to the United States. By 1986, pups were being cattle or sheep, then they should protect them better; no reared, and the gray wolves were making a come back just leave them out there with no one looking, like from almost extinction. As the pack that had crossed putting a pile of candy in front of a little kid, and over grew, it split into two, then three, but remained in expecting them not to eat it. the national parks. No matter how much people want to deny it, wolves and Soon, people reported sightings of wolves in Idaho and humans aren’t that different. We hunt to survive. We’re Wyoming, almost 90 miles away. By 1996, the U.S. Fish curious, intelligent, and can adapt. Also, we have and Wildlife Service decided to reintroduce wolves families. So are we really that different that we need to permanently to the US, releasing captured packs into 2.2 kill off these amazing animals just to make our own lives million acre, Yellowstone National Park. This action by easier. I don’t think that’s the right choice. We should the service was met with many different emotions, like learn to coexist with them. hope, hate, and resentment. The wolves worked fast and soon, the population was growing and the war grew worse. 569 sheep and cattle death from wolves were Facebook. Why so popular? confirmed in 2008. That same year, humans, for Tiffany attacking their livestock, killed 264 wolves. This didn’t bruise the wolf population much, since they had grown Facebook is one of the most popular website for people now. to 1,600 wolves in the west alone. It’s a fun social website with a lot to do so it’s no surprise it’s so popular. In fact, 2% of the world population has a Many thought this was amazing, coming from all over facebook. It doesn’t seem like a lot but it’s really 120 million the country to see these magnificent animals in people. What I want to know right now, is what makes facebook so popular? Everyone has something they like about Yellowstone, adding $ 35 million to that area’s facebook so I organized a poll asking several students from economy, just with tourists and wildlife enthusiasts. But Wellesley Middle School to answer. cattle ranchers and people that lived up in the mountains where wolves roamed felt the exact opposite. They The question was, “What makes facebook so popular for feared going into the woods and wolves to them were you?” Here are the results: What Makes Facebook So four-legged killing machines. Ranchers wanted to take Popular? matters into their own hands and get rid of the wolves, once and for all. May 2009, wildlife services declared Photos: 10 people: 20% that canis lupus recovered and the federal government Chat: 18 people: 36% no longer protected it. The state government declared the Wall Posts: 16 people: 32% Farmville: 6 people: 12% first wolf hunt in decades. Soon, the rules were changed and wolves were labeled as game and could be shot Total: 50 People whenever they appeared, even pregnant females. In Wyoming, wolves were labeled as vermin, pests and Well it looks like what makes Facebook so popular for could be hunted year round. students at Wellesley Middle School is Chat.
  3. 3. Cindy always had long limbs making her tall, long dark brown hair, a cute little nose, and a smile that made the sun jealous. Then I saw her. The Cinderella Life Part III “Cindy?” I whispered. “W-What is it, Sire? I didn’t quite catch that,” the servant next By Melanie to me said rather loudly. I ran down the stairs as everybody made a path for me through the crowds right up to her. My name is Andrew. I have lost the only woman I have ever loved. Years have passed and I’m the new heir to Swan “Cindy? Cindy! Oh it is you!” The crowd gasped. House. In Cindy’s diary, she wrote, ‘If something should ever happen, I will pass the land to Andrew.’ The Duchess is “Cindy” turned around. Everything about her was the same. nearing her death and I am supposedly going to get married. Her face has gotten a little slimmer and her eyes a little wider, but all of her was the same. “Andrew, dear, are you ready for the ball?” I couldn’t believe my eyes. The sudden relief, love and “Yes, Duchess. I am.” I shrugged on my jacket and looked at happiness that swept through me was overwhelming. She her. The Duchess smiled, looking me up and down, then cocked her head to the side and laughed. walked out. I’m not going to find anyone I love. Not even if they were the most beautiful woman in the world. I only see “My, my Sir Andrew. I wouldn’t have expected you to choose Cindy. me.” Her voice. Her laugh. The high chiming bells I’ve waited for. “Sir Andrew! The ball is about to start. Please make your way “Cindy… how?” I finally asked. down the stairs!” a servant said, and ran away fast. “Cindy?” A lady behind her nearly shouted. I sighed, and dragged myself down the stairs like I was “I… am not Cindy. I am Stella. Who is this… Cindy… whom carrying a thousand bricks. The light at the bottom of the you are speaking of?” Stella asked hesitantly. Stella? No, that staircase was nearly blinding. I stopped to take a deep breath cannot be possible. She looks exactly like Cindy. This can’t and made sure I was wearing Cindy’s necklace. be… Then I stepped into the golden light. The whole room went “Sir Andrew, would it be possible for us to speak in private?” silent from the excited chattering that went on seconds before. Stella said so quietly and under her breath that it was barely a whisper. I nodded very slightly and commanded the crowd to “Hello, townspeople! I want to thank you all for coming to keep enjoying themselves. I took her outside to the snow- this celebration.” (Just nearly choked it out there.) “I know blanketed courtyard. She suddenly turned around and came up that all of you want your daughters to get chosen to be my…” very close to my face. Nothing. I couldn’t even utter it. The people started to murmur. A couple people even cleared their throats. The “Where is my sister?” Sister? Cindy had a twin sister? Duchess muttered something and a servant came and kicked “She… she’s dead. The Duchess killed her.” my calf. “I am also the Duke’s daughter. I was laying stones on the pathway when I was stolen and replaced by my sister just a “WIFE.” Wow…A little too forceful. Someone started to clap, few days ago. I am the original Cindy.” ending my incredibly embarrassing speech. Under the lights of the chandeliers, men were drinking wine and talking about work. Women were chatting and eating Practice small amounts of food, talking about who they thought I was By Charlotte going to choose. If only I could say, “None of you.” Noel sat down and stretched her fingers. This ball was a lie. I won’t let anybody marry me. Not unless She let out a long, frustrated sigh. they were Cindy. I promised her. “Okay,” said her piano teacher, Rob. “Let’s get started. Noel, would you like to begin?” “Do you see anyone to your liking, Sire?” Another servant smiled. He wanted me to take over the land. I wanted to, too. Noel knew it was only because he wanted to get her disastrous But I can’t. Not until the Duchess dies. playing out of the way. She didn’t understand why he even made her come to these stupid tryouts in the first place. They I surfed the crowd. One girl had Cindy’s hair, but not her body both knew she’d never make the spring concert. All of Rob’s proportions. Another had Cindy’s limbs but looked very stuck best students played in it, and as they both knew, Noel was not up. I’m not judging her by her looks, she just screamed at one of them. It wasn’t that Rob was a bad teacher— it was just someone saying I would pick that someone and then she that Noel hated the piano. She never wanted to see another one shoved that person into the punch bowl.
  4. 4. of them again. Any way, her parents said that when she finished sixth grade, she could quit if she wanted to. She stretched her fingers and took a deep breath. She played her piece. Flawlessly. “Okay!” Noel said, her voice was dripping with fake enthusiasm. She stood up and made her way to the piano When she returned to her seat, her mom and Rob both gave bench. As soon as she had started playing, she wished she had her surprised, proud looks. never even got out of bed that morning. The concert hall was When Noel graduated from sixth grade the next week, her filled with her fingers banging out the simplest ballad Rob parents told her they would cancel her lessons. could have found. It sounded worse than terrible. “But why?” Noel asked. She finished, stood up and returned to her seat. Everyone clapped, but Noel knew it was because they were relieved she “We thought you hated them!” they said, incredulously. had finished. The concert eventually ended and Noel went home with her mother. The ride home was silent. “No, they’re all right,” she replied. The next week, the email was sent out to the students that would be performing in the spring concert. Predictably, Noel was not on the list. Mysteries in New York Part III By Noor Two days later, Noel had her piano lesson. She walked in and Part 1 and 2 Summary sat next to Rob on the long piano bench. Lynn, Alicia, and Myra have gone on a vacation to New York! On the way back to a park where Alicia “You played great at the tryouts!” he said, obviously trying to accidentally forgets a purse, the three girls find Kitty, a start the lesson off on the right foot. lost, lonely child. It is then that Alicia mysteriously disappears, leaving her two friends along with Kitty to “I didn’t make it,” Noel replied. find their way out of this bone-chilling, spine-shivering “Well, there seems to have been a slight change of plans.” park. Lynn and Myra are at their wit’s end about what to Noel looked at Rob questioningly. do with this lost child. They must also find Alicia. Should “Alice Green will be in Finland for the performance, and it they abandon the girl and get back to the restaurant looks like you were next on the list.” Noel’s face fell, but only where they are supposed to meet their parents? Should for an instant. She knew Rob was happy for her. they focus on finding a safe place for Kitty? Eventually, the girls drop Kitty at an orphanage but now they must “That’s great!” she said. If great meant totally, horribly not search for their friend, Alicia, in the huge city of New good. The look in Rob’s eyes was… Noel couldn’t describe it. York. She just knew that it meant she would have to be good at the concert. Lynn surveyed the bustling New York streets with h er piercing eyes, in hopes of glimpsing her friend, Alicia ’s That also meant she would have to practice. Hard. bright purple jacket. Unfortunately, no lilac coats Noel walked home from the lesson. The brisk, fall wind caught her eye. “Where to now, Myra?” she asked, her burned her face. She tucked her chin into her coat. voice dripping with anguish. She did practice hard. The next day when her mother returned from work, she found Noel sitting on the piano bench, Myra kept glancing back at the Parker Orphanage concentrating while she pressed gently on the keys. Her where the girls had just dropped off Kitty. “I hope mother shot her a peculiar look, but then smiled. she’s safe, and happy, and cared for, and loved for, and—” The weeks before the concert flew by. When the day finally “I get it,” Lynn interrupted, wryly. “Wh at now?” came, Noel was nervous, but confident. She was sure she could play her best at the concert. The two girls stood at the edge of the road for two whole minutes, just standing silently, as New Yorkers When Noel and her mother walked into the concert hall, passed by them, glancing curiously at the girls. Noel’s hands began to sweat. Her stomach filled with “The police?” Myra asked, a ll of a sudden. “Maybe butterflies. This only got worse when she found her name first they can do a big search !” on the program. Her and her mother filed in with all the other “For just one missing teenager whom they probably children and their mothers, and fathers, and brothers, and wouldn’t care if she got kidnapped or mugged or sisters. There were so many people! whatever people do?” Lynn asked, frowning. “Maybe,” Myra shrugged, defensively. Rob stood in front of everyone. Apparently, he would be the “I don’t th ink so,” Lynn said. “Let’s ask around at stores MC for the evening. He called Noel’s name, and she went up near the park?” to the piano and sat on the bench.
  5. 5. The girls ran back to the park and pushed open the door Long tables ran across the room, filled with empty of a store which was right near the park. plates. Mrs. Bird and two other women got out a big bowl and platter of food. The other three ladies “’Scuse me, but have you seen a girl with brown ha ir, disappeared down the ha l l. li lac jacket, age fourteen, red skirt?” Myra asked, K itty sat down at the small bench and swung her legs. earnestly. The smell of food made her stomach ache and she fel t “Ha !” the man thrust the cans he was holding onto th e sick. Suddenly, she felt a ll alone and in despair. shelf, and lunged for the girls. However, there was no time to cry and th ink about her “HELP!” Lynn screamed. The girls ran and ran down the mother. A lady marched up to street, unaware of where they were running. K itty’s pla te and dumped some Myra twisted around and the man was nowhere in sta le- looking mashed potatoes sight. and a small bowl of salad in front “Oh my gosh, that was close!” Lynn panted. “Where are of her. Her cup was filled wit h we!?” cold milk. The streets were dark and the houses were pitch-bla ck K itty tasted the food, reluctantly at f irst, then gulped and very eerie-looking. it down. It was sta le, not at a ll like her mother’s hot “LET’S GET OUTTA HERE!” Myra h issed. and deliciously fresh food. But it was food, and Kit ty a te it all. With her stomach full of dinner, Kitty’s The girls ran back out of the street, but just as they were thoughts turned to her mother. All she wanted now was coming out of the alleyway and back to the brightly- l i t a grown-up to hug her and tuck her into bed. streets, they heard a woman sing softly—but clearly— * * * “Oh my Kitty, where are you? I have food for you, and—” “The girls are in danger,” Mrs. Horvan, Myra’s mother, announced defiantly. “Why else would they take so “My KITTY?” Myra repeated. “Kitty?! Th at is her long!?” mom, maybe?” she stopped walking. “ ‘Kitty’ isn’t that common… We could be wrong…” Lynn “They’re probably looking in a store,” Mrs. Ca lvin, said, but she still looked anxious. “Do you th ink we just Alicia’s mother, tittered nervously. “Don’t-don’t dropped a random kid into an orphanage when sh e worry, it’s … okay.” wasn’t even an orphan?! How do we expla in th is to her mother!” Mrs. Calvin looked more nervous th an she would admit. By now, a waitress had served the ir drinks, brough t “Maybe the lady isn’t looking for Kitty. Maybe she’s the appetizer, and had delivered their food ha lf an looking for … her cat?” Myra said. hour ago. “Let’s go back to the park, forget about Kitty, and ask around in stores.” Lynn rubbed her temples, tiredly. “We’ll h ave to go out to find them!” Mrs. Percy, Lynn’s “Okay?” mother, announced. “I’m sure noth ing terrible has h appened. None of them will even pick up their cel l “Sure,” Myra agreed, wearily. “Let’s go.” phone!” * * * K itty sat up on her bed, rested from her nap. S he looked “Oh, Alicia’s phone is in the hote l, around the orphanage room, remembering th a t a ta l l charging,” Mr. Calvin remembered. and pretty girl h ad dropped her here. The girl smelled “Myra’s phone is at home—we forgot like roses—a smell th a t reminded Kitty of her mother. it,” Mr. Horvan recalled. “Mommy,” she wh ispered. Hot tears rolled down her “Wh at about Lynn’s!?” Mrs. Percy cried. cheeks as Kitty wished her mother was here. * * * Nervously, Mrs. Ca lvin drummed her fingers on th e The ta ll Mrs. Bird entered the room again with f ive table. No one had touched their food. other ladies. “Dinner time, girls! Line up and we’ll go downsta irs.” Mr. Horvan jumped up and grabbed his wallet. “Th e girls wouldn’t take this long to come back. It’s been Confused, Kitty got off her bed and wiped off her tears. nearly an hour! We have to go and find them, now. Mommy would want me to be brave, she thought. S h e How could we have done th at, let them go followed the other girls down the sta irs and into a themselves?!” Mr. Horvan uttered ruefully as he threw large, brightly-lit h a ll. K itty felt a bit more cheered, down his money and the six adults rushed out of th e but still wanted her mother or at least the ta ll girl who restaurant. could be her sister. (TO BE CONTINUED IN THE SUMMER EDITION…)
  6. 6. Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat WMS Musical * March 18 & 19, 2010 Congrats to the WMS cast and crew for a fabulous show!
  7. 7. ACTIVITY PAGES FOUR Riddles: (riddle answers 3 pgs forward…) 1. Lost in the woods, you finally happen upon a rickety old bridge across a deep ravine. The ravine is too steep to go down and climb back up. You need to know if the bridge is safe. As luck would have it, you recognize that on the other side of the bridge is that dreadful town, "Truth and Liarsville". Everyone who lives there either ALWAYS tells the truth or ALWAYS lies. You are tired and you've been lost in Truth and Liarsville before. You see three men on the other side of the bridge. You shout out: "Are you truth-tellers?" The first man says something, but you can't hear what he said. The second man shouts, "He said he was a truth-teller." The third man shouts, "No, he didn't. He said he was a liar." Which man do you ask to find out whether or not the bridge is safe? 2. Two women are playing chess. They play five games. Each one wins five games with no ties. How can this be? 3. In 1990, a person is 15 years old. In 1995 that same person is 10 years old. How is this possible? 4. There are 2 policemen parked along a one-way street looking for traffic violations. They spot a taxi driver going in the wrong direction, yet they do nothing. Why?
  8. 8. The HANDMADE Maze by Molly EARTH DAY WORD SCRAMBLE Earth Day is April 22 (during school vacation) Don’t forget to honor our planet by recycling and conserving energy… Unscramble these words for important things to remember! Answers on following pages… Look for the sick planet!
  9. 9. CAN YOU MAKE SENSE OF THIS?!?!?!?!?!? Strangeness in the Sack WARNING: This is not the most serious story anyone’s ever read or written. Reading the following may result in loss of sanity or maturity or knowledge of proper spelling and grammar. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! By: Athenee I was going outside for a walk, when all of a sudden I was pulled aside. “Ssshhh!!!” the strange guy said. I struggled around and tried to hit the guy. But the guy was too strong and didn’t feel my punches. Then he knocked me unconscious. I woke up with a big splitting headache and stood up. But I couldn’t stand up! Let’s go back to the beginning. My name is Daya and I am 12 years old. I go to the Wellesley Middle School, my friends are Aya, Joe, and Allyhoop. My favorite sport is basketball, and I like hats. I get straight-Z’s in class (I always thought that was a better grade than A’s, I don’t know why everyone says I’m stupid) and I am the class clown. Why is 1+1=2? I always wonder about that. Why can’t it be 1+1= window? When I tried to stand up, I fell right to the floor with a huge thump! I groaned and kept trying. Then I realized! I. Was. Kidnapped! I remember having my head in a sack with a bunch of rotten potatoes. That really smelled like pudding made from bonbons, but it smelled really terrible. Then I threw up, and cuddled with rats. It was cold and barren except for RATS AND ROTTEN POTATOES. It isn’t exactly the place I would want to live in for the rest of my life though. And so I went and yelled “WOO-HOO! Yippeeyiyoyo” After all, I have to live here for the rest of my life. I guess. I kept staring at the cloth with closed eyes. I sighed, what kind of life is there in a sack? Then I bumped into something, maybe to my right. Maybe rats in a sack will appreciate me more and give me F’s instead. Then I tried to pull off the sack and get up. The more I tried the more tangled with the sack I got. Then I sang myself a lullaby, Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. I know it’s a bit strange, but I DON’T CARE!!! Then someone pulled up the sack and yelled at me, “What are you DOING in this SACK!” I answered back, “’Cuz I was KIDNAPPED, duh!” “Well, how would I know that!” “You should know, person! What sane person spends the rest of their life in a potato sack!” (Awkward silence by random audience.) “Yeah… okay. I get it.” Then I got up, brushed the dirt off and ran off without telling ‘thank you’.    THE END!!!!    RIDDLE ANSWERS 1. The first man would always say he is a truth-teller. If he is a truth-teller, of course he would say so. If he is a liar, he would still say he is a truth-teller. This means that the second man told the truth. Ask the second man whether or not the bridge is safe. You could always ask the third man, as long as you're aware he is lying. 2. They aren't playing against each other. 3. If the years are "B.C.” instead of A.D. that would be possible. 4. The taxi driver was walking. EARTH DAY UNSCRAMBLE ANSWERS
  10. 10. * WMS Boston Globe Scholastic Art Competition 2010 Winners * Early January 2010, WMS art teachers submitted art to the Boston Globe Scholastic Art Competition. 23 WMS students won either Silver or Gold key awards. 14 others won Honorable Mentions. This year, WMS was recognized more than any other school in the state. There were over 6500 entries this year and almost 500 senior portfolios. The state gave out 2151 awards and recognitions. You will be able to view all their artwork during the K-12 art exhibit at Wellsley Free Library during the month of April. WMS Silver Key Winners are: WMS Gold Key Winners are: Caroline Eldridge- Design Eden Mintz - Photography Hannah Gilman- Painting Lauren Cristiano Rizika- Ceramics & Glass Nobsak Godhue- Photography Ethan Watson- Drawing Georgina Hahn-Griffins- Jewelry Anna Zannetos- Jewelry Ian Hoffman- Digital art Lauren Barnard- Sculpture Alexandra Lee- Photography Sarah Bradach- Photography Katherine Lucas- Mixed media Meaghan Colby- Jewelry Laura Robinson- Jewelry Tyler Jung- Painting Elisa Rocha- Mixed media Eliza Klenk- Photography Christina Seibel- Ceramic& Glass Chloe Kolbet- Mixed Media Ilana Shektman- Drawing Juyon Lee- Digital Art Alison Leibowitz- Painting WMS Honorable Mentions are: Taylor Barnhill- Painting Serena Benages- Ceramics & Glass WMS RECEIVES 2 NATIONAL GOLD KEY AWARDS! Anna Bortnick- Ceramics & Glass There’s more exciting news - All state gold keys are sent for national Ashton Chryssicas- Sculpture judging. Two weeks ago, we found out that two WMS students, Angelina Diana- Mixed Media Sarah Bradach- photography and Jy Lee- Digital Art, received Grace Drury- Photography National Gold key recognitions! It is a tremendous honor to get a Kimberly Johnston- Ceramics & Glass National Gold key and no other middle school in the state received this Carolina Leslie- Design honor. Recipients are invited to the National Award Ceremonies in Han Li - Digital Art NYC, June 9th and 10th along with the other national Gold Key winners Annie McCauley- Jewelry Julia Novakoff- Digital Art from across the country. Carl Richardson- Ceramics & Glass Congratulations to all of our WMS winners!  Jacob Salerno- Ceramics & Glass Sarah B Gr. 8 Photography “Strength of Peace” State and National Globe Scholastic Art Award 2010
  11. 11. home runs, but has never equaled that total again. Bay has hit more than 30 homers four times in the last five years including a career-high 36 last year, 12 more than Cameron hit, even though Bay had fewer at-bats. Adrian Beltre takes Mike Lowell’s place at third base after finishing last season with nine fewer home runs and a batting average .025 less than the No Offense, Red Sox Won’t aging veteran coming off of hip surgery. Scutaro had just six more home runs than last year’s shortstop Nick Green, even Win World Series though Scutaro had 302 more at-bats. Due to this diminished By Jonathan offense, despite a highly regarded pitching staff the Red Sox should finish no higher than third in the AL East. In the past six years, Theo Epstein has put together five playoff teams and two World Series champions. Going into 2010, Epstein’s clear approach was to improve the pitching and defense to help prepare the Red Sox to win another Lebron or Kobe: My Opinion championship, ignoring the proven formula for success, By Matt particularly in the American League. When someone thinks of basketball legends they think of The American League is becoming increasing reliant on names like Michael Jordan… Larry Bird… Magic Johnson… hitting, and all five AL East teams were in the top eleven (out Julius Erving… Kareem Abdul-Jabbar… Bill Russell… John of thirty Major League teams) in batting average. The eventual Stockton… Brian Scalabrine (just kidding)… John MLB champions, the New York Yankees, finished the 2009 Havlichek… Lebron James … Kobe Bryant. Yes, Lebron and regular season with a .283 batting average, just behind the Kobe. They both started splaying. That’s how good they are. Angels for first in the Major Leagues. The Yankees and There’s currently a huge debate over which player is better. I Angels held the number one and two spots in runs, hits, and am here to tell you what I think about this. RBIs as well. They also finished first and third in On-Base Percentage and Slugging Percentage. In the post season, these Now, I’m not a ESPN analysyst or a Sports Illustrated strong hitting teams proved to be the best in the American columnist, but I do know some things about basketball. I League as they met in the ALCS, which the Yankees would go know that James Naismith invented the game. I also know that on to win to set up a World Series match-up with the Phillies, Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player who ever who along with the Yankees, had the major league’s top two lived. And that the New Jersey Nets… well it might be a bit spots in home runs. Meanwhile, of the eleven teams with the offensive to some fans of the team (if there are any). I know a lowest team Earned Run Averages, only three qualified for the lot of other things about basketball but I won’t go through playoffs, all in the weaker National League. Similarly, the them all. Oh and I know one more thing that I think is worth eleven teams that allowed the fewest hits produced the same mentioning. Lebron is a much better basketball player than miniscule amount of playoff teams: three. When it came to Kobe. batting, however, five out of the top seven teams in hits and all of the top six teams in runs scored were playoff-bound at All of you Kobe fans could argue with me about this, but I season’s end. Top teams made their run to and through the would easily prevail: playoffs through hitting. Kobe fan: Kobe has 4 championship rings. The Boston Red Sox lost all three of their playoff games, Me: Lebron (the reigning MVP) has no team behind him. scoring a total of just seven runs against the Angels, six of Kobe had Shaq and Derek Fisher for many years and now has them coming in one game. But despite their obvious offensive Lamar Odom, Pau Gasol and many others to back him up. Of need, the Red Sox have shown no urgency to replenish their course he doesn’t even use them at all. Every time you see the quickly-weakening batting line-up. Even after signing John Lakers attempt a buzzer beater in the past couple of years it Lackey, with Jason Bay now with the Mets and #34 34 years has been Kobe taking the final shot, but missing 85% of the old and aging quickly, without signing or trading for a proven time. hitter the Red Sox cannot succeed in the division that has produced three different World Series participants in the last Kobe fan: Kobe once averaged 35.1 points per game in a three years. season. Lebron’s best is only 31.1. Me: True, but every time Kobe has the ball he only keeps his This off-season, besides Lackey the Red Sox signed Mike eyes on the basket. Lebron, who always looks for the open Cameron, Adrian Beltre, and Marco Scutaro. Cameron has shot, whether he or another Cavalier takes it, averages 2.3 won a Gold Glove and will become the third outfielder, more assists per game than him. replacing Bay. Cameron’s talents, however, consist almost solely of fielding and speed. Cameron’s career .250 batting Another argument would only merit another response, making average is .030 lower than Bay’s .280. In totaling .250, any more banter completely pointless. Even though Kobe is Cameron has never over .275, a feat that Bay has completed great he should hail to King James. five times in eight fewer seasons. In 2004, Cameron hit 30