4. Qualities of a Good Mentee
- Self Directed
- Appreciative
- Enthusiastic
- Communicative
- Open-minded
- Honest
5. Questions to think about:
- What is it you really want you (or your company)
to do or be?
- What are you doing well to help you get there?
- What are you not doing well that is preventing you from
getting there?
- What will you do differently to meet those challenges?
- Where do you need help?
- How do you define success in the mentoring relationship?
6. What can you get out of mentorship?
- Advice on business trajectory/options
- Learn to develop maximum potential
- Learn to set business goals and strategies to achieve them
- Expand networks and broaden horizons
- To use the successful person as a role model
- Get a big picture view of your business
7. Picking the Right Mentor
- Can being my mentor be of value for them?
- Do I like and respect this person?
- Does this person have the time and interest?
- Can this person help open doors/create opportunity for me?
- Does this person have the personality and relevant
skillset to challenge me in unexpected ways?
8. Tips for Success
- Know what your goals are
- Document the meeting
- Pick the right settings
- Be open, honest and
actively listen
- Know when it’s not
working - Manage Expectations (!!)
- Give thanks & feedback
9. Knowing what your goals are
Think about what you want to achieve broadly. What is the
"vision" of the relationship and what does success look like?
Activity 1: Try working backwards and describing yourself
"after" the mentoring.
Activity 2: Figure out how will you know when you have
achieved the goals of mentoring.
10. Picking the right setting
- Don’t meet at loud places
- Find a place where you can speak freely
- Make sure the location is convenient to your mentor
- Set next meeting time at the end of each meeting
11. Documenting the Meeting
- Compose meeting agendas in advance
- Make sure every agenda item drives outcomes
- Give your mentor time to review agenda & provide feedback
- Prioritize important items first
- Try to estimate how long each item will take to go through
- Summarize the meeting, focusing on key takeaways and
action items
12. Be Open, Honest & Actively Listen
- Commit to challenging yourself & your assumptions
- Take notes or record the session
- Repeat back in your own words
13. Know when it’s not working
- Make sure there’s chemistry
- Don’t drag on a relationship
- Don’t hold mentors on a pedestal
14. Giving Thanks & Feedback
- Say thank you whenever you can
- Provide specific examples of ways they’ve helped
you
15. Managing Expectations
- Establish communication protocol
- Establish procedures for setting up meetings
- Identify availability and frequency of meeting times
- Renegotiate mentoring agreement when things
change
- Set ground rules
16. Set Ground Rules
- Helps both parties understand their rights & responsibilities
- Establishes boundaries of the relationship
- Determines the scope of what’s discussed
- Clarifies issues w/ legal ramifications (like confidentiality)
Know what to expect from the mentoring relationship
- Availability of mentor outside of session
- Other considerations: (notes, cancellations, sessions)
17. Sample Ground Rules
- Both parties will be on time to meetings (or alert otherwise)
- Both parties will be open-minded & non-judgemental
- As confidential as is legally possible
- Meetings take place in a quiet, private place w/ vegan options
- Either party can withdraw whenever necessary
- Will only discuss professional life
18. You Need to Have Ownership
Over Your Own Development
Sponsor or Advocate: Vouches for you, puts reputation on the line
Experienced Guide: Have achieved what you want, shows you the way
Coach: Offers new perspectives, holds you accountable
Types of mentorship relationships:
Single leader (one leader, many mentees)
Mixed Level (mixed group of mentor and mentees)
Peer (similar professional level)
Qualities of a good mentee:
Self-directed (proactive, self-disciplined)
Appreciative
Enthusiastic
Communicative
Open-minded
Honest
Questions:
What is it you really want you (or your company) to do or be?
What are you doing well to help you get there?
What are you not doing well that is preventing you from getting there?
What will you do differently to meet those challenges
Where do you need help?
How will you define success in the mentee/mentor relationship
Sample things to get out of relationship:
Advice on business trajectory/options
Learn to develop maximum potential
To set business goals and strategies to achieve them
To Expand Networks and Broaden Horizons
To use the successful person as a role model
To raise your profile
To get a big picture view
Picking the right mentor:
Do I like & respect this person?
Does this person have time & interest?
Can being my mentor be of value for me?
Can this person help open doors/create opportunity for me?
Does this person have the personality & relevant skillset to challenge me in unexpected ways?
Tips for Success:
1.) Know what your goals are
2.) Document the Meeting
3.) Pick the right Settings
4.) Be open honest and actively listen
5.) Know when it’s not working
7.) Give thanks & feedback:
8.) Manage Expectations
Mentors are usually busy people will little time to chat so effective communication is critical for the relationship. You need to be laser focused on outcomes. Think about what you want to achieve broadly. What is the "vision" of the relationship and what does success look like?
Activity 1: Try working backwards and describing yourself "after" the mentoring. What will you look like- then work backwards to how you got there.
Activity 2: Figure out how will you know when you have achieved the goals of mentoring. Can you define some tangible metrics that you can use to check yourself against progress?
Pick the right Settings:
A good mentoring session requires deep focus and honesty, so don't meet at loud coffee shops or bars
Take the effort to book a place where you and your mentor can speak freely
Make sure the location is convenient for the mentor. Don't make them work too hard to meet you
Set meeting time at the end of each meeting (if you don’t have a regular date/time)
2.) Document the Meeting:
Compose meeting agendas in advance
Ensure that every agenda item drives outcomes
Give your mentor time to review the agenda and provide feedback
prioritize urgent/important topics first
Try to estimate how long each item will take to go through, stick to the set times.
Summarize the meeting, focusing on key takeaways & action items
Be open, honest and actively listen
This will only work if you're honest and open-minded. You have to make the commitment to challenge yourself and your assumptions. The entire purpose of this is to drive change, and this will only work if you're real with yourself and are mentally ready.
You have to actively listen as well. Whether that means taking detailed note or records an audio track to review later (esp if english is not your first language). (ask mentor)
Repeat back, in your own words, what your mentor tells you so you can make sure you understand fully and can internalize and personalize this feedback.
Keep in mind, this is a personal relationship, and much like dating or friendship, there has to be a certain chemistry between you two. Despite doing everything right, there might not be anything there.
Don't allow a mentor relationship to last longer than the value of the relationship. Don't drag it on. If you are no longer finding value, or if you get the sense your mentor is not finding value, stop the mentoring immediately and try to find a different mentor.
Don’t hold them on a pedestal! Mentors can be wrong! Everyone makes mistakes, no matter how successful they are. Listen to your internal compass and if this relationship goes in an uncomfortable direction, be prepared to say no, without losing respect for your mentor.
Give Thanks & Feedback:
Make sure to recognize your mentor's commitment and say thank you whenever you have a chance.
GIve your mentor tangible, specific examples of where their feedback has yielded positive returns for you. It'll make them feel better, more motivated to work with you and gives them ideas of what works best.
Managing Expectations:
Establish how you will be communicating (phone, email, text, slack)?
establish procedures for setting up and conducting meetings
identify availability and frequency of meeting times
Confirm meetings
Renegotiate mentoring agreement when things change
Set ground rules:
- establishes a framework within which to facilitate your development
- helps both parties understand what to expect from the mentoring relationship
- clarifies the rights and responsibilities of both parties in the mentoring relationship
- encourage discussion to define the boundaries of that relationship
- clarifies the issues of confidentiality within the mentoring relationship
- The scope of what will be discussed (personal vs professional issues) (choose not to share personal information w/ mentor)
- availability of mentors outside of agreed session
Other:
- Frequency & durations of mentoring sessions (other session things- dietary restrictions, noise level, etc)
- Cancellations
- need for notes? Who will take them and where will they live? (Google Drive)
Sample rules:
- Either party can withdraw from the relationship due to personality classes (A "no-fault" provision for ending the relationship)
- Both parties agree to be on time as much as possible and alert the other party of tardiness
- open, honest, supportive discussion
- Objective & nonjudgmental (not there to assess their performance)
- takes place in a quiet private place with no interruptions
- As confidential as is possible (considering ethics)
- Only discuss professional life
Mentees need to have ownership over their development.
It's the mentee's responsibility for their Personal Development Plan (PDP):
- identify their learning and development needs
- plan how to meet these needs
- undertake the development activities identified in their plan
- document all this
Menses must be honest, demonstrate commitment to their development, be prepared and have thought about their development before the mentor session in order to full benefit.