HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE BY: DALE CARNEGIE PRESENTED BY: NITIN KADAM SUNIL AWHAD SANKET JAGARE
Overview of PresentationBackground InformationOverview of how to win……Parts I-IV of the bookUse in negotiation.Dale Carnegie Courses
Background Information November 24, 1888 - November 1, 1955 Born poor then became a teacher Moved to sales Wrote How to Win…& 6 more Began D.C. courses Died of Hodgkin’s Disease
Overview of How to Win… First modern self-help book NYT best seller list 15 million copies It provides advice on: -dealing with others -gaining influence -becoming successful -motivating othersSeeing relationships as ends themselves instead of a means to an end! Requires sincerity
Part I: Fundamental Techniques “If you want to gather honey don’t kick over the beehive.” -Effects of criticism - Instead try positive reinforcement Give others honest & sincere appreciation -Feeling of Importance Arouse in others an eager want -People are interested in their own wants
Part II: 6 Ways Become genuinely interested in other people. -people are interested in themselves. -listen -remember key facts Smile -enthusiasm when greeting Remember names -favorite word -use with a few personal details
Part II: 6 Ways Be a good listener -different from active listening -ask more questions -listen to complaints to ease tensions Talk in terms of the other person’s interests. -find out about their interests -ask ?s about their interests Make the other person feel important & appreciated -recognize tangible contributions -avoid flattery
Part III: How to win people to your way of thinking The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. Show respect for the other persons opinions. Never say "youre wrong." Dont argue, instead use diplomacy. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. Remember the old proverb, "by fighting you never get enough, but by yielding, you get more than you expected." Begin in a friendly way. Remember what Lincoln said: A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall." Get the other person saying “ yes,yes" immediately.
Part III: How to win people to your way of thinking Let the other person do a great deal of talking, its safety valve in handling complaints. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers, its good to get co-operation. Try honestly to see things from the other persons point of view. Be sympathetic with the other persons ideas and desires. Appeal to their nobler motives. Make people feel that you consider them honest, upright and fair.
Part III: How to win people to your way of thinking Dramatize your ideas. Throw down a challenge. Every successful person wants a chance of self expression, the chance to prove ones worth.
Part IV: How to change people Begin with praise and honest appreciation. Call attention to peoples mistakes indirectly. Talk about your own mistakes, before criticizing the other person. Ask questions, instead of giving direct orders. Let the other person save face. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation ;and lavish in your praise." Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
Use in Negotiation Carnegie, The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it 1. Welcome disagreements: Separate people from the problem 2. Stay calm: first recognize emotions,theirs and yours 3. Listen first: Listen actively 4. Identify areas of agreement: look for areas of mutual gain. 5. Admit your errors so they can do the same: Try to avoid a contest of will. 6. If no resolution, delay action, think more: one problem is premature judgment.
D. Carnegie Courses Typically have 10-30 participants in a 12 wk. course. Instructors are graduates of the program who have worked in management positions. Half of each class is devoted to students making presentations from personal experience. The other half is made up of lectures and small group work. Public speaking, memory techniques, importance of learning names, and conversational techniques are learned.