You Wish Said Comedy

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You Wish Said Comedy

  1. 1. Some Days It’s Not Even Worth Chewing Through the Restraints.
  2. 2. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?
  3. 3. People like you are the reason people like me Need Medication!
  4. 4. Your Opinion is Simply Wrong. . .
  5. 5. 5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions
  6. 6. If The First Three New Actuators Didn’t Fix It; Why Do You Think A Fourth New One Will?
  7. 7. Stress is when you wake up screaming and then realize you haven’t gone to sleep yet . . .
  8. 8. Please Don’t Stare: Jealously is SO unattractive!
  9. 9. So, did you eat a bowl of Stupid for breakfast?
  10. 10. There is no reason to act Stupid; Even if you are so good at it…
  11. 11. What do you mean you need me to work eight days this week?
  12. 12. Jesus Loves You (but I’m still His favorite!)
  13. 13. Silly Boys, TRUCKS are for GIRLS
  14. 14. I’m on a DRINKING TEAM with a bowling problem
  15. 15. Sarcasm: Just One More Service I Offer.
  16. 16. I’m Only Wearing BLACK Until They Make Something Darker
  17. 17. I’m Only Half Evil 333
  18. 18. Especially when you work around so many asses. Manure Occureth
  19. 19. With Luck and Planning - I’ll Be Able to Retire Before I’m 100
  20. 20. Am I Just Getting Older or Is the Supermarket Beginning to Play Really Great Music?
  21. 21. A Clear Conscience is Usually the sign of a bad memory
  22. 22. I’m Not Crazy; I’m Eccentric
  23. 23. It’s All English To Me
  24. 24. Dr. Edward Deming? We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Deming!
  25. 25. If you think you have personnel who are not performing, the most likely cause is a lack of support from management . U.S. Air Force Supervisor Training Course
  26. 26. You’re So Open-minded Your Brains Fell Out.
  27. 27. Come to think of it, You Really ARE Stupid
  28. 28. Today is the Tomorrow You Worried About Yesterday
  29. 29. “ All I Wanted Was An Honest Week’s Pay For An Honest Day’s Work.” - MSgt. Bilko
  30. 30. There is No Problem That Can’t Be Made Worse With the Help of Direct Management Involvement.

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