Conflict magic


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The correlation between the Thomas-Kilmann conflict model and DiSC is strong. We use this presentation with a DiSC profile to help teams manage conflict effectively.

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Conflict magic

  1. 1. Behavioral Shopping Spree <ul><li>Match people to the behavioral descriptions </li></ul><ul><li>Collect as many signatures as you can </li></ul><ul><li>Put your name on your paper </li></ul>
  2. 2. Conflict Magic
  3. 3. Definition Situation in which the concerns of two people appear to be incompatible. of Conflict:
  4. 4. What Brought Us Together? <ul><li>Our Mission is to maintain and improve veterans' health and quality of life. </li></ul><ul><li>Our Vision is to be the Provider and Employer of Choice by delivering the best health care services. </li></ul><ul><li>Our Values are Trust, Respect, Excellence, Compassion and Commitment. </li></ul>
  5. 6. When individuals with different needs come together, conflict often occurs
  6. 7. Mapping Your Behavior 4 2 3 1 1 Friendly Conscientious Bold Enthusiastic D i S C
  7. 8. Tally Box Scores D i S C
  8. 9. TASK PEOPLE UnFavorable Favorable What? Who? Why? How? D i C S More Powerful Active/Outgoing Direct Indirect Reserved Less Powerful
  9. 10. Understanding Conflict The fact that we are all different Makes conflict inevitable
  10. 11. Understanding Conflict One person’s natural strengths can expose another’s natural limitations
  11. 12. Understanding Conflict Conflicts are differences heated up!
  12. 13. Understanding Conflict People do what they do, not because they are trying to do something to you, but for themselves!
  13. 14. Understanding Conflict Conflicts can be our similarities in competition !
  14. 15. Understanding Conflict Conflicts also occur when strengths are pushed out of balance.
  15. 16. The Golden Rule Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
  16. 17. The Platinum Rule Do unto others as they would have you do unto them
  17. 18. Conflict Modes Cooperativeness Assertiveness Competing Accommodating Avoiding Collaborating Compromising
  18. 19. Two heads are better than one. Kill your enemies with kindness. Split the difference. Leave well enough alone. Might makes right.
  19. 20. Perceptions
  20. 21. Competing <ul><li>When quick, decisive action is vital - e.g., emergencies </li></ul><ul><li>On important issues where unpopular courses of action need to be implemented - e.g., cost cutting, enforcing unpopular rules, discipline </li></ul><ul><li>On issues vital to company welfare when you know you’re right </li></ul><ul><li>To protect yourself against people who take advantage of non-competitive behavior </li></ul>
  21. 22. Accommodating <ul><li>When you realize that you are wrong - to learn from others, and to show that you are reasonable </li></ul><ul><li>When the issue is much more important to the other person than to yourself - as a goodwill measure </li></ul><ul><li>To build up social credits for later issues important to you </li></ul><ul><li>When continued competition would only damage your cause - when you are outmatched and losing </li></ul><ul><li>When preserving harmony and avoiding disruption are important </li></ul><ul><li>To aid in the development of others by allowing them to experiment and learn from their own mistakes </li></ul>
  22. 23. Avoiding <ul><li>When an issue is trivial, of only passing importance, or when other more important issues are pressing </li></ul><ul><li>When you perceive no chance of satisfying your concerns - e.g., when you have low power or something is difficult to change </li></ul><ul><li>When the potential damage of confronting a conflict outweighs the advantages of an immediate decision </li></ul><ul><li>To let people cool down </li></ul><ul><li>When gathering more information outweighs the advantages of an immediate decision </li></ul><ul><li>When others can resolve the conflict more effectively </li></ul>
  23. 24. Compromising <ul><li>When goals are moderately important, but not worth the effort or potential disruption of more assertive modes </li></ul><ul><li>When two opponents with equal power are strongly committed to mutually exclusive goals - as in labor - management bargaining </li></ul><ul><li>To achieve temporary settlements to complex issues </li></ul><ul><li>To arrive at expedient solutions under time pressure </li></ul><ul><li>As a backup mode when collaboration or competition fails to be successful </li></ul>
  24. 25. Collaborating <ul><li>To find an integrative solution when both sets of concerns are too important to be compromised </li></ul><ul><li>When your objective is to learn - e.g., testing your own assumptions, understanding the views of others </li></ul><ul><li>To merge insights from people with different perspectives on a problem </li></ul><ul><li>To gain commitment by incorporating other’s concerns into a consensual decision </li></ul><ul><li>To work through hard feelings which have been interfering with an interpersonal relationship </li></ul>
  25. 26. Resolving Conflict <ul><li>Avoid “right - wrong” debates by stating your differences without judgement. </li></ul><ul><li>Use open-ended questions to get to the real issues </li></ul><ul><li>Ask them what would be necessary to have a win/win solution </li></ul><ul><li>Wrap up the discussion by stating what each person has committed to do to resolve the conflict </li></ul>D High “D” Tends to take a direct, aggressive approach which may result in “I win/you lose”
  26. 27. Resolving Conflict <ul><li>Recognize their discomfort with conflict or loss of approval </li></ul><ul><li>State the issue factually without criticism of them as a person </li></ul><ul><li>Limit their attempts to minimize the problem or sidetrack the discussion </li></ul><ul><li>Wrap up the discussion with a clear statement of what is going to happen, by when, and affirm your relationship with them </li></ul>i High “i” Tends to avoid direct, open conflict
  27. 28. Resolving Conflict <ul><li>State the need to resolve the conflict in order to maintain stability and harmony in the relationship </li></ul><ul><li>Draw out uncomfortable issues by asking open-ended questions </li></ul><ul><li>Ask them what they would need to resolve the issue in a way that was reasonable and effective </li></ul>S High “S” Tends to avoid aggression, hostility or conflict
  28. 29. Resolving Conflict <ul><li>State the issue calmly, logically, and factually, citing specific behavior </li></ul><ul><li>Ask what they would need to resolve this conflict on a “win-win” basis </li></ul><ul><li>Recognize their need to think about the situation before responding by scheduling a time to have a follow-up discussion </li></ul>C High “C” Tends to initially withdraw from open conflict but may become defensive or aggressive
  29. 30. Resources <ul><li> </li></ul><ul><li>Private Entrance </li></ul><ul><li>connect </li></ul><ul><li>succeed </li></ul>
  30. 31. Frank and Ernest