Chesapeake Influence

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Chesapeake Influence

  1. 1. Influence SkillsThe Power of Influence Andrew L. Urich, J.D. Puterbaugh Professor of Ethics & Legal Studies Oklahoma State University aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com 405.744.8619
  2. 2. Can I Influence You? McDonald’s Coffee Case Is $3 Million Reasonable? www.andrewurich.com
  3. 3. Idea #1The Facts Don’t Matter……… If No One Believes You The FACTS don’t matter! – Politics – Marketing vs. Finance Literally a matter of life and death. Ability to influence is a key to success. www.andrewurich.com
  4. 4. Slide provided by www.aaronbeam.net
  5. 5. Slide provided by www.aaronbeam.net
  6. 6. Idea #2People Are Annoying I am a hypocrite. I play favorites. I interpret rules in a way that benefits me. I have been known to ignore rules that get in my way. I like people better if they like me. www.andrewurich.com
  7. 7. Idea #2People Are Annoying I like my ideas better just because they’re mine. I think it’s fun to say “no” when I have the power to do so. You cannot change how I see the world. It is important to me to look good in the eyes of others. I don’t even know 1/10th of 1% about anything, but I think I know everything. www.andrewurich.com
  8. 8. Idea #2People Are Annoying I like to be “right.” I love to say “I told you so.” I hate to admit I’m wrong even in those rare situations when it looks like I might be. Here’s how I make decisions: I decide what I want the answer to be – and then make up the logical reasons to support my decision. www.andrewurich.com
  9. 9. Idea #3Conflict Is Underrated Everyone wants to participate in decisions that affect them. Dispersion of power causes conflict and growing pains. Conflict identifies opportunities for improvement. www.andrewurich.com
  10. 10. Idea #4Authority Is OUT – Influence Is IN Use competence and commitment instead of position and status. Team building and leadership are not based on authority. We are influencing all of the time – positively or negatively.  The sign in PS 101  My daughter wants to go to Vegas  Authority at Tinker Air Force Base www.andrewurich.com
  11. 11. Idea #5When is “Sucking Up” actually “Sucking Up?” It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel.  My neighbor’s pictures  Baby pictures  The IT people www.andrewurich.com
  12. 12. The Advantage of Ethical Influence“A lie can travel halfway aroundthe world while the truth is puttingon its shoes.” -- Mark Twain www.andrewurich.com
  13. 13. Keys to Influence & Informal NegotiationStrategy for Success: Plan in advance! A little preparation saves the day. It’s not always what you do say – it’s often what you don’t say. www.andrewurich.com
  14. 14. Keys to InfluenceStrategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning1. Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen)2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest).3. Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part)4. Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you)5. Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important) www.andrewurich.com
  15. 15. COMMUNICATION BLOCKERSIf They Aren’t Listening… It Doesn’t Matter What You Say.
  16. 16. Communication BlockersMultiple Choice Question a) U.S.D.A. b) A.A.A.E. c) OSU Ag College d) K Fed www.andrewurich.com
  17. 17. Communication BlockersMultiple Choice Question a) U.S.D.A. b) A.A.A.E. c) OSU Ag College d) K Fed www.andrewurich.com
  18. 18. Limit the Impact of Your Point of View Areyou impacted by experience? (Driving Rule of Relativity) Are you assuming everyone should think like you? Could you be wrong? www.andrewurich.com
  19. 19. Overcome the Bias of Others What stereotypes might they have about you? How can you outflank their bias? People can only hear and incorporate things they understand. www.andrewurich.com
  20. 20. Learn to Open Closed Minds Things are exactly as people choose to see them. Is it important enough to care? Value diversity. www.andrewurich.com
  21. 21. Win/Win OpportunitiesManaging the Impact of Self Interest.
  22. 22. Factor in the Interestsof Both Sides How will the other person profit from your relationship? Can you make the other person’s job easier? Can you help the other person appear better in the eyes of his/her superiors? www.andrewurich.com
  23. 23. Win/Win Make the Pie Bigger Instead of Arguing About How to Slice It Win/Win is an attitude. – 62% believe in the fixed pie fallacy. – Pay close attention to their concerns. – Use creativity, diligence and enthusiasm to identify new options. www.andrewurich.com
  24. 24. Become a Persuasive Manager Be Likeable and Look the Part!
  25. 25. Learn to Become EVEN More LikeableWe prefer to comply with the requests of people we like.  We like, trust, and believe people who like us. www.andrewurich.com
  26. 26. Learn to Become More LikeableIt’s not fair– but people judge you by your appearance.Well-Dressed People are Perceived As: – More productive – Responsible – Personally acceptable – More intelligent – More honest – Hardworking – Taking their job seriously www.andrewurich.com
  27. 27. Learn to Become More Likeable Consistently search for similarities between yourself and those with which you deal. Develop the habit of giving sincere compliments. Familiarity and contact enhance liking. www.andrewurich.com
  28. 28. Learn to Become More Likeable Listening and taking an interest in the other person Friendliness Body language – smiling, nodding, leaning in, eye contact People like optimistic and enthusiastic people. www.andrewurich.com
  29. 29. Avoid Conflict and Confrontations Make Them Feel Good About You.
  30. 30. You Will Never Prove Them Wrong Have you ever done it before? Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy? How would you feel if someone proved you wrong? www.andrewurich.com
  31. 31. Avoid Confrontations What they say – has a lot to do with what you already said. Theirlife experience is different than yours. Focus on the issue – don’t make it personal. Be very considerate. www.andrewurich.com
  32. 32. Keys to InfluenceStrategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning1. Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen)2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest).3. Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part)4. Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you)5. Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important) www.andrewurich.com
  33. 33. Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember1. The most important thing – do they like you?2. The other most important thing – break through communication blockers.3. Authority is out – influence is in.4. Planning influence opportunities in advance can lead you to great success.5. Look for Win/win opportunities. www.andrewurich.com
  34. 34. Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember6. You have a point of view.7. Do not underestimate self-interest.8. You will never prove them wrong.9. It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel.10. Good relationships provide power, security and success! www.andrewurich.com
  35. 35. Thank You Please keep in touch. aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com I Like You! www.andrewurich.com
  36. 36. References Ailes, Roger. You Are the Message. New York. Doubleday, 1988. Cialdini, Robert B. Influence: Science and Practice. 3rd Ed. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Cohen, Herb. You Can Negotiate Anything. Secaucus, N.J.: Lyle Stuart, 1980 Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1989. Dayton, Doug. Selling Microsoft. Holbrook, MA., Adams Media Corporation, 1997. Fisher, Roger and William Ury. Getting to Yes. New York: Viking Penguin, Inc., 1981. Forsyth, Patrick. The Negotiators Pocketbook. London: Alresford Press Ltd., 1993. Johnson, Spencer. The One Minute Sales Person. William Morrow, N.Y, 1984. Karrass, Chester L. Give and Take. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Karrass, Chester L. The Negotiating Game. New York: Harper Collins, 1992. Kozicki, Stephen. The Creative Negotiator. Pyrmont, Australia: Gower, 1993. Lewicki, Roy J., et.al. Negotiation. 2nd Edition. Burr Ridge, Il.: Irwin, 1994. Nierenberg, Gerald 1. The Art of Negotiating. New York: Barnes & Noble, 1995. Paul, Richard. Critical Thinking. Santa Rosa, CA: Foundation for Critical Thinking, 1993. Schoonmaker, Alan N. Negotiate to Win: Gaining the Psychological Edge. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Prentice Hall, 1989. www.andrewurich.com

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