GW(RO) March 2nd

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The presentation that accompanied Patrick E. McLean's unique and entertaining professional writing class good words (right order) on March 2nd.

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GW(RO) March 2nd

  1. 1. March 2nd, 2010 good words (right order)
  2. 2. THE PROBLEM
  3. 3. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in excess of an employee's regular duty assignment, and when such work is estimated to require a full shift of eight (8) hours or more on two EMAIL THIS IS A REAL (2) or more FROM A REAL HR DEPARTMENT consecutive days, even though unscheduled days intervene, an employee's tour of duty TO REAL OFFICES, NATIONWIDE. shall be altered so as to include the hours when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  4. 4. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in excess of an employee's regular duty assignment, and when such work is estimated to require a full shift of eight (8) hours or more on two (2) or more consecutive days, even though unscheduled days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall be altered so as to include the hours when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  5. 5. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in excess of an employee's regular duty assignment, and when such work is WHAT HAPPENS? estimated to require a full shift of eight (8) hours or more on two (2) or more 1 email to 10 offices consecutive days, even though unscheduled 8 people call (10m each) days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall be altered so as to include the hours 2 people misapply the policy (2h) when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  6. 6. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in COST of an employee's regular TOTAL excess duty assignment, and when such work is 80m (people require a full shift of eight (8) estimated to who called) 80m (HR more on two (2) or more hours or person) 4h (people who misapplied) consecutive days, even though unscheduled 4h (HR person) days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall beperson’sso as to include the hours 2h (HR altered boss) when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result from such 16h 40m employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  7. 7. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in COST of an employee's regular TOTAL excess duty assignment, and when such work is 80m (people require a full shift of eight (8) estimated to who called) 80m (HR more on two (2) or more hours or person) 4h (people who misapplied) consecutive days, even though unscheduled 4h (HR person) days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall beperson’sso as to include the hours 2h (HR altered boss) when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result in labor 16h 40m x $35/h = $513.34 from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  8. 8. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in COST of an employee's regular TOTAL excess duty assignment, and when such work is 80m (people require a full shift of eight (8) estimated to who called) 80m (HR more on two (2) or more hours or person) 4h (people who misapplied) consecutive days, even though unscheduled 4h (HR person) days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall beperson’sso as to include the hours 2h (HR altered boss) when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would result in labor 16h 40m x $35/h = $513.34 from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  9. 9. When workloads increase to a level requiring hours in COST of an employee's regular TOTAL excess duty assignment, and when such work is 80 minutes (people who called) eight (8) estimated to require a full shift of 80 minutes (HR person) or more hours or more on two (2) 4 hours (people who misapplied) consecutive days, even though unscheduled 4 hours (HR person) days intervene, an employee's tour of duty shall be altered so as boss) 2 hours (HR person’s to include the hours when such work must be done, unless an adverse impact would resultin labor 16h40m x $35/h = $513.34 from such employee's absence from his previously scheduled assignment.
  10. 10. The Opportunity
  11. 11. Writing has never been more powerful.
  12. 12. Or so easy to transmit.
  13. 13. Or so easy to transmit.
  14. 14. Want a blog?
  15. 15. Send an email.
  16. 16. All of this has happened since 2000.
  17. 17. Internet hosts by year.
  18. 18. opportunity danger
  19. 19. “When a man's knowledge is not in order, the more of it he has the greater will be his confusion.” -- Herbert Spencer
  20. 20. QUESTION 1: How and why did writing develop?
  21. 21. There once was man from Nantucket,
  22. 22. Writing gives you the power to preserve words through time and transmit them across distance.
  23. 23. Tiger: having an asian mother and a military father you Jaimee: haha I wish cannot and will not ever be full Tiger: having an asian mother and a military fat of yourself , 6:38 p.m.) cannot and will not ever be full of yourself Jaimee: miss u (Sept. 27, 6:38 p.m.) I have fun with u, you always make me smile and I Jaimee: who is your new boy toy Jaimee: I have fun with u, you always make me Tiger: now that's hot so who is your new boy toymyself or say anything to u ... the day I am not afraid to be ... still running dry... been on 2 real met u I thought u were going to am not afraidato betimes but say anything to u .. kick me out few myself or :( Jaimee: no new boy toy ... still running dry... been on didn't and uu I thoughtmewere going to kick me out a fe for someone reason you 2 real met have told u numerous dates in the pat 2 months :( times I talk to much but slowly as I someone reason you didn't and u have told m for get to know u iI think Tiger: I need you your absolutely amazing times I talk to much but slowly as I get to know ght ass over here and visit me! I need your absolutely amazing Jaimee: then get your tight ass over here are wrong I'mIbone thugs in harmon Tiger: you and visit me! need u Tiger: you are wrong I'm bone thugs in harmon ut soon Jaimee: Something wrong babe?I was excited to sepnd time Tiger: I will wear you out soon u this week (Oct. 15, 6:40 p.m.) with Jaimee: Something wrong babe?I was excited to a new piercing with u this week (Oct. 15, 6:40 p.m.) Jaimee: how soon? I got a new piercing you Sunda night. Its the only night in which I Tiger: I will am totally free but I have to leave at 530will you Sunda night. Its the only night Tiger: I Monday morning to Tiger: really. Where c of it ... is on my cheek below my drive up to the valley for an outing for onefree but I have to leave at 530 Monda am totally of my sponsors. diamond Jaimee: I just sent u a pic of it ... is onat 8 pm on below my newport to the valley for an outing for one of my See you my cheek Sunday in drive up eye ... implanted a little diamond See you at 8 pm on Sunday in newport dn't pick up on that Tiger: don't text me back till tomorrow morning. I have to Tiger: send it again. I didn't pick uppeople around me right now many on that Tiger: don't text me back till tomorrow morning me attention from me many people around me right now Tiger: you just need some attention from me something very naughty (Oct. 18, 3:40 p.m.) Tiger: send me y friend (8:45 p.m.) Tiger: send me something very naughty (Oct. 18 Tiger: do you have a boy friend (8:45 p.m.) things are worth waiting for lol ... besides im Jaimee: some e someone I am dating ... no ... u can at work am dating ... no ... u can Jaimee: some things are worth waiting for lol ... Jaimee: I don't even have someone I at work be my boyfriend ;) Tiger: go to the bathroom and take it Tiger: go to the bathroom and take it Tiger: then I am Jaimee: haha ur too much Jaimee: haha ur too much Jaimee: I wish Jaimee: are u leaving me cause your wife is still in newport : ely we will always be together
  24. 24. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH
  25. 25. If you’re not sure about it, don’t WRITE IT, TYPE IT, BLOG it, IM it, TWITTER it or SMS it.
  26. 26. “Keep a diary, and it will keep you.”
  27. 27. QUESTION 2: Where do words come from?
  28. 28. (Okay Smartass, where does the dictionary get them?)
  29. 29. Nouns manager Adjectives nervy dialogue aerial accused mimic noiseless dislocate auspicious addiction misgiving obscene divest baseless alligator mountaineer olympian drug beached amazement ode premeditated dwindle bloodstained anchovies outbreak promethean elbow blushing assassination pageantry quarrelsome enmesh circumstantial backing pedant radiance film consanguineous bandit perusal rancorous forward deafening bedroom questioning reclusive gossip disgraceful bump reinforcement remorseless grovel domineering buzzers retirement rival hobnob enrapt courtship roadway sacrificial humour critic rumination epileptic sanctimonious hurry dauntless savagery equivocal softhearted impedes dawn scuffles eventful splitting jet design shudders fashionable stealthy jig dickens switch foregone traditional label discontent tardiness frugal tranquil lapse embrace transcendence generous unmitigated lower employer urging gloomy unreal misquote engagements watchdog gnarled varied negotiate excitements wormhole hush vaulting numb exposure zany inaudible viewless pander eyeball Verbs invulnerable widowed partner fixture besmirch jaded worthless petition futurity bet juiced yelping puke glow blanket lackluster Adverbs rant gust cake laughable importantly reword hint cater lonely instinctively secure immediacy champion lustrous obsequiously submerge investments compromise madcap threateningly swagger kickshaws cow majestic tightly torture leapfrog denote marketable trippingly unclog luggage deracinate monumental unaware
  30. 30. “our language be considered the words and phrases used in the general intercourse of life” Samuel Johnson from ‘The Plan of an English Dictionary”
  31. 31. You are the source of your own authentic language.
  32. 32. QUESTION 3: Why aren’t words spelled like they sound?
  33. 33. pepulle pupill pepille pupyll pepil pupul pepylle peuple pepyll pople peeple poepul poepull puple
  34. 34. people
  35. 35. But the pronunciation kept evolving.
  36. 36. food used to pronounced as fode life used to be pronounced as lyf
  37. 37. QUESTION 4: Why does English have so many synonyms?
  38. 38. Liberty or Freedom?
  39. 39. Angry or Wrathful?
  40. 40. Help or Assist?
  41. 41. Famine or Hunger?
  42. 42. Hungor
  43. 43. Famine
  44. 44. J’ai faim.
  45. 45. Pre 1066 – William the Bastard
  46. 46. Post 1066 – William the Conqueror
  47. 47. Pork or Swine?
  48. 48. PorkHerd or SwineHerd?
  49. 49. “Show me the invading word!”
  50. 50. Liberty or Freedom?
  51. 51. Anger or Rage?
  52. 52. Assist or Help?
  53. 53. Fatherly or Paternal?
  54. 54. Amicable or Friendly?
  55. 55. Poultry or Hen?
  56. 56. Soil or Earth?
  57. 57. Infant or Child?
  58. 58. Abdomen or Belly?
  59. 59. god or diety
  60. 60. suppose or guess
  61. 61. begin or commence
  62. 62. QUESTION 5: With all these words, which ones do you use?
  63. 63. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH:
  64. 64. USE THE GOOD ONES.
  65. 65. Good words are words of clear, unambigous meaning.
  66. 66. Never use a fancy word when a simple word will do.
  67. 67. Fancy words add an adverse and detrimental quality to all kinds of lexographical activity.
  68. 68. Fancy words suck.
  69. 69. Niggardly
  70. 70. David Howard is not a smart man.
  71. 71. Niggardly = Miserly
  72. 72. "You hate to think you have to censor your language to meet other people's lack of understanding." Julian Bond, then Chairman of the NAACP
  73. 73. When faced with a choice between niggardly and miserly...
  74. 74. Use the word CHEAP every single time.
  75. 75. So why did David Howard use the word, “niggardly?”
  76. 76. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH:
  77. 77. ALWAYS USE THE SIMPLEST WORD YOU CAN.
  78. 78. “First, learn to hammer in the nails, and if what you build is sturdy and serviceable, take satisfaction in its plain strength.” William Zinnser, from “On Writing Well.”
  79. 79. Good words are specific
  80. 80. “The perpetrator performed an aggravated assault on the victim which resulted in substantial injuries and the subsequent...”
  81. 81. “Bill hit Steve in the head with a hammer.”
  82. 82. “Bill (perpetrator) hit Steve (victim) in the head with a hammer. (assault)”
  83. 83. “We are a global, diverse family with a proud heritage, passionately committed to providing outstanding products and services.”
  84. 84. “Imagine that the CEO just gave you the edict to ‘find internal sources of value that can translate into bottom line benefits over the next five years.’” From a UPS White Paper about Supply Chain Solutions.
  85. 85. “Imagine that the CEO told you to cut costs.”
  86. 86. Use as few words as possible.
  87. 87. OMIT NEEDLESS WORDS Vigorous writing is concise. A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail and treat his subjects only in outline, but that every word tell. From the “Elements of Style,” by Strunk and White
  88. 88. Use words like you had to pay for each of them.
  89. 89. “A very common misstep in organizing a strategic sourcing program often relates to the supporting infrastructure – the strategy, process, organization and technology.” From a UPS White Paper about Supply Chain Solutions.
  90. 90. “A very common misstep in organizing a strategic sourcing program often relates to the supporting infrastructure – the strategy, process, organization and technology.” From a UPS White Paper about Supply Chain Solutions.
  91. 91. Words to be immediately suspicious of:
  92. 92. Words to be immediately suspicious of: 1. Adverbs ending in -ly
  93. 93. Words to be immediately suspicious of: 1. Adverbs ending in -ly
  94. 94. Words to be suspicious of: 1. Adverbs ending in -ly
  95. 95. Words to be suspicious of: 1. Adverbs ending in -ly 2. Adjectives
  96. 96. The camel died quite suddenly on the second day, and Selena fretted sulkily and, buffing her already impeccable nails--not for the first time since the journey began--pondered snidely if this would dissolve into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent with Basil. Gail Cain 1983 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winner
  97. 97. The camel died quite suddenly on the second day, and Selena fretted sulkily and, buffing her already impeccable nails--not for the first time since the journey began--pondered snidely if this would dissolve into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent with Basil. Gail Cain 1983 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winner
  98. 98. The camel died on the second day. Selena fretted sulkily and, buffing her already impeccable nails--not for the first time since the journey began-- pondered snidely if this would dissolve into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent with Basil. Gail Cain 1983 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winner
  99. 99. Words to be suspicious of: 1. Adverbs ending in -ly 2. Adjectives 3. Jargon
  100. 100. Why do people use jargon?
  101. 101. Why would someone say: Are you experiencing any pain?
  102. 102. When they could ask: Does it hurt?
  103. 103. Goodwill Industries International enhances the dignity and quality of life of individuals, families and communities by eliminating barriers to opportunity and helping people in need reach their fullest potential through the power of work. Goodwill Mission Statement
  104. 104. We help people who are looking for work or better jobs so they can better provide for their families. What directs you to the Mission Statement on Goodwill.com
  105. 105. We help people who are looking for work or better jobs so they can better provide for their families.
  106. 106. We help people who are looking for work or better jobs so they can provide for their families.
  107. 107. We help people provide for their families.
  108. 108. Goodwill Industries International enhances the dignity and quality of life of individuals, families and communities by eliminating barriers to opportunity and helping people in need reach their fullest potential through the power of work. Goodwill Mission Statement
  109. 109. We help people provide for their families through the transformative power of work.
  110. 110. “I gained an immense advantage over the cleverer boys... I got into my bones the essential structure of the ordinary sentence – which is a noble thing.” Sir Winston Churchill
  111. 111. good words (right order)
  112. 112. right order = subject verb (object)
  113. 113. Jesus wept.
  114. 114. subject object verb
  115. 115. Bob the ball throws
  116. 116. 3, 4 , x = 12
  117. 117. Bob throws the ball.
  118. 118. 3 x 4 = 12
  119. 119. “Use the analytic tool of complete sentences. Including subjects and predicates.” Lou Gerstner, IBM
  120. 120. A sentence is any combination of words that expresses a complete thought.
  121. 121. No.
  122. 122. Jesus wept.
  123. 123. “It’s form was an exact quadrangle; and we may calculate that a square of about seven hundred yards was sufficient for the encampment of twenty thousand; though a similar number of our own troops would expose to the enemy a front of more than treble of that extent.” Edward Gibbon from “The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.
  124. 124. A sentence is linguistic device designed to hold one (and only one) idea.
  125. 125. “Did you know that Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope?” Idon’tknowamus.
  126. 126. Idea #1 “Did you know that Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope?” Idon’tknowamus.
  127. 127. Idea #1 “Did you know that Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address while {traveling from Washington to Idea #2 Gettysburg} on the back of an envelope?” Idon’tknowamus.
  128. 128. Idea #1 “Did you know that Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address while {traveling from Washington to Idea #2 Gettysburg} on the back of an envelope?” Idea #3 Idon’tknowamus.
  129. 129. Subject Verb “Did you know that Abraham Lincoln, while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg, wrote the Gettysburg Address on the back of an envelope? Object Idon’tknowamus.
  130. 130. Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address.
  131. 131. Every sentence, no matter how complicated, confused or unclear can be broken down into Subject Verb (Object)
  132. 132. “Robinson, who coaches the Oregon State Beavers, was cheered on by the President, who snacked on popcorn, the First Lady, Sasha, Malia and the girls’ grandmother Marian Robinson.” cnn.com
  133. 133. “A very common misstep in organizing a strategic sourcing program often relates to the supporting infrastructure – the strategy, process, organization and technology.” From a UPS White Paper about Supply Chain Solutions.
  134. 134. “Avoid the passive voice”
  135. 135. “An error has been found in your account.”
  136. 136. “We made a mistake.”
  137. 137. The problem with the passive voice is that it violates subject verb (object)
  138. 138. “Honey, an affair was had.”
  139. 139. “I slept with my tennis coach.”
  140. 140. The passive voice is the voice of all those who seek to dissemble, obsfucate or otherwise cover their ass.
  141. 141. The passive voice also violates the principle of omitting needless words.
  142. 142. “Many famous quotations from Churchill, Roosevelt and Kennedy were used by the speaker in his talk on “Famous Political Orators.”
  143. 143. “Many famous quotations from Churchill, Roosevelt and Kennedy 20 were used by the speaker in his talk on “Famous Political Orators.” The speaker quoted Churchill, Roosevelt and Kennedy during his 14 discussion of “Famous Presidential Orators.”
  144. 144. “Many famous quotations from Churchill, Roosevelt and Kennedy 20 were used by the speaker in his talk on “Famous Political Orators.” Bill Cunningham gave a talk about famous political orators. He 15 quoted Churchill, Roosevelt and Kennedy.
  145. 145. How do you say something that’s never been said before?
  146. 146. How do you say that for which their are no words?
  147. 147. When you put two words next to each other, a third meaning, is created that cannot be contained within definitions of either word.
  148. 148. ham
  149. 149. ball
  150. 150. funnel
  151. 151. funnel ball
  152. 152. ball funnel
  153. 153. ham funnel
  154. 154. “Ma’am, could you please ask your husband to stop cramming sandwiches down his ham funnel?”
  155. 155. “...a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming it’s blood funnel into anything that smells like money.” Matt Tabbibi describing Goldman Sachs
  156. 156. He’s obviously upset.
  157. 157. He’s eloquently upset.
  158. 158. “What does it say that Iranians can march by the millions, put life and limb on the line, while Americans sit meekly by as a financial colossus with tentacles deep into the federal government enriches itself beyond our imagination on the backs of the poor and the struggling?” Peter Daou on Goldman Sachs
  159. 159. “The first draft of everything is shit.” Ernest Hemingway
  160. 160. “Clutter is the disease of American writing.” William Zinnser, ‘On Writing Well’
  161. 161. “There is no great writing, only great rewriting.” Justice Louis Brandeis
  162. 162. Rewriting Procedure 1. read it out loud 2. figure out what it is trying to say 3. check for bad words 4. check for wrong order 5. rewrite it 6. read it out loud
  163. 163. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH
  164. 164. READ IT OUT LOUD
  165. 165. NO, REALLY.
  166. 166. Purpose: To release you into your authenticity to become a catalyst for success in your life and work. Mission and Vision Statement For Interact V1
  167. 167. “Purpose: To teach businesspeople to communicate with power, ease and grace.” Method: We release you into your authenticity, giving you both the permission and the ability to speak from who you really are – right from the soles of your shoes. 
  168. 168. I utilized a multi-tined tool to process a starch resource.
  169. 169. All patient meals will be rethermalized by use of a microwave oven before delivery to patients.
  170. 170. With the gold and silver out of reach, Ohno scooted furiously past brothers Charles and Francois Hamelin to earn a bronze in the short-track 1,000- meter final Saturday night, making him the most decorated U.S. Winter Olympian. The Associated Press
  171. 171. Much too frequently, the criminal manages to escape the scene of a crime because he manages to escape the visual capability of the responding officers.
  172. 172. We are continuing to broaden our understanding and knowledge pertaining to print production and graphic design.
  173. 173. On Monday, the digital content organization plans to announce several moves that signal it is ready for companies to start building devices and services with the technology this year.
  174. 174. Celebrations moved like a wave from east to west as midnight joyously struck across the globe and the world welcomed 2010. In New York, at least 1 million people watched the iconic ball drop in Times Square. cnn.com
  175. 175. Valais is the first water bottled in the Swiss Alps to be sold in the United States. The final design for the bottle label reflects the Swiss heritage by featuring a mountain images, as well as a Swiss flag icon. It informs consumers visually that this is a refreshing, natural beverage.
  176. 176. Businesses planning sales strategy perceive buying power as a gauge of the general ability of potential customers to buy their products.
  177. 177. Reality show stars Kim, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian can now sell the clothes right off their backs to their fans. The Associated Press
  178. 178. “It is one thing to study war and another to live the warrior's life.” Telemon of Arcadia
  179. 179. How to write like a professional
  180. 180. Writing is The entire process by which we discover what we are trying to say.
  181. 181. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH
  182. 182. It’s okay to be lost.
  183. 183. In fact, you can’t do creative work without getting lost. It’s a part of the process.
  184. 184. The Creative Process 1. There is a problem. 2. You gather information. 3. You develop solutions/options. 4. Some of them seem okay. Not great. 5. You run out of ideas. 6. You put it out of your mind completely. 7. The Eureka moment.
  185. 185. I believe that we get, at most, SIX periods of concentration a day.
  186. 186. “A writer only gets 2 to 3 hours of productivity a day.”
  187. 187. “The writing part isn’t hard, it’s sitting down to write.” Steven Pressfield
  188. 188. CELLPHONE
  189. 189. E-MAIL CELLPHONE
  190. 190. E-MAIL SMS CELLPHONE
  191. 191. CO-WORKERS E-MAIL SMS CELLPHONE
  192. 192. CO-WORKERS IM E-MAIL SMS CELLPHONE
  193. 193. CO-WORKERS IM E-MAIL LANDLINE SMS CELLPHONE
  194. 194. CO-WORKERS TWITTER IM E-MAIL LANDLINE SMS CELLPHONE
  195. 195. Plus whatever else is going on in your head.
  196. 196. THE TOMATO CAN SAVE US.
  197. 197. = 25 focused minutes
  198. 198. The Pomodoro Technique 1. Choose a task 2. Set timer to 25 minutes 3. Work on the task until the timer rings.* 4. Take a short break. 5. Every four Pomodoros, a longer break.
  199. 199. The Pomodoro is not about time. It is about your awareness of time.
  200. 200. YOUR MONEY’S WORTH
  201. 201. WRITING IS SPIRITUALLY DIFFICULT BECAUSE OF THE ANXIETY OF BECOMING.
  202. 202. What we do is a consequence of where we place our attention.
  203. 203. Pick a topic
  204. 204. “He writes the worst English that I have ever encountered. It reminds me of a string of wet sponges; it reminds me of tattered washing on the line; it reminds me of stale bean soup, of college yells, of dogs barking idiotically through endless nights. It is so bad that a sort of grandeur creeps into it.” H.L. Mencken on Warren G. Harding

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