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7 Stages Of Marriage

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7 Stages Of Marriage

  1. 1. 7 Stages of Marriage <ul><li>Presented in the </li></ul><ul><li>Council for Relationships </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  2. 2. Timeline of Marriage Embrace Change <ul><li>Every marriage is unique. </li></ul><ul><li>Change never, ever stops. </li></ul><ul><li>Incredible, inevitable journey </li></ul><ul><li>Live your stage. </li></ul><ul><li>Cultivate love </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  3. 3. What’s in Store <ul><li>Understand the core mission of your marriage. </li></ul><ul><li>Develop new strengths for the journey ahead. </li></ul><ul><li>Sidestep advice that could threaten your marriage. </li></ul><ul><li>Avoid time and effort-wasting wrong moves. </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  4. 4. What difference does a Stage make? <ul><li>. Life experience is dynamic, changing and dimensional </li></ul><ul><li>Life cycle development is predictable </li></ul><ul><li>Life cycle development is individual, interactional, and intergenerational </li></ul><ul><li>Life cycle development is marked by the passing of time </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  5. 5. What is unique about the “7 Stages”? <ul><li>Developmental issues and tasks have been identified </li></ul><ul><li>Normative events are described </li></ul><ul><li>Practical exercises and activities useful in educational workshops and counseling practice </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  6. 6. The Benefit of Knowing the 7 Stages <ul><li>Provides a roadmap for today and tomorrow </li></ul><ul><li>Normalizes the experiences of marriage </li></ul><ul><li>Knowing the missions for the stages provides focus </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  7. 7. Marriage Today <ul><li>Marriage is a value </li></ul><ul><li>What the State tells us </li></ul><ul><li>The Reader's Digest Survey </li></ul><ul><li>The Benefits of Marriage </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  8. 8. Reader’s Digest Survey The Survey Says….. <ul><li>Marriage Isn’t Broken </li></ul><ul><li>It’s Really About Trust </li></ul><ul><li>Laughter is More Important than Sex </li></ul><ul><li>Guys Get Gushy About Marriage, Too </li></ul><ul><li>Challenges Make Us Stronger </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  9. 9. 7 Stages at a Glance <ul><li>Passion </li></ul><ul><li>Realization </li></ul><ul><li>Rebellion </li></ul><ul><li>Cooperation </li></ul><ul><li>Reunion </li></ul><ul><li>Explosion </li></ul><ul><li>Completion </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  10. 10. Measuring Your Marriage Life Long Journey <ul><li>Stages don’t have start times – or ending dates. </li></ul><ul><li>Two stages can overlap. </li></ul><ul><li>You can “repeat” or revisit an earlier stage. </li></ul><ul><li>You can use the lessons of an earlier stage to enhance your current stage. </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  11. 11. PASSION <ul><li>The Love Cocktail – Know the essential ingredients </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  12. 12. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1 – Savor the Passion </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2 – Forge a Sense of “We” </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3 – Learn your Love Languages </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4 – Build Emotional Intimacy </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 5 – Expand Your Sexual Vocabulary </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  13. 13. REALIZATION <ul><li>The rose-colored glasses come off now – differentiation begins </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  14. 14. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1: Understand your Expectations </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Open, Honest Talking </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3: Learn Empathetic Listening </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4: Be Friends </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 5: Split Household Chores Fairly </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 6: Become a Money Team </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  15. 15. REBELLION <ul><li>Me, Me, Me! </li></ul><ul><li>Growth through conflict - from control </li></ul><ul><li>to compromise.... </li></ul><ul><li>on to negotiation </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  16. 16. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1: Turn Power Struggles into Acceptance </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Move from Conflict to Problem- Solving </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3: Set and Pursue Healthy Personal Goals </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4: Renew Your Spirituality </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 5: Recover from Infidelities </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 6: Forgive Your Spouse and Yourself </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  17. 17. COOPERATION <ul><li>Lots to do – work, family, friends, future planning </li></ul><ul><li>Not enough time </li></ul><ul><li>Not enough money </li></ul><ul><li>Not enough sexual intimacy </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  18. 18. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1: Let Parenthood Strengthen Your Marriage </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Settle Conflicts – and Connect as Friends </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3: Invite Romance Back into Your Marriage </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4: De-Stress – and Make Love Again </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  19. 19. REUNION <ul><li>The First Stage of the Rest of Your Marriage – strengthening mutuality </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  20. 20. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1: Shift Your Focus Back to Your Marriage </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Get off Autopilot </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3: Welcome Boomerang Kids – Without Neglecting Your Marriage </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4: Use Your Marriage to Create Good Health </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  21. 21. EXPLOSION <ul><li>Random Crises </li></ul><ul><li>Health -physical/emotional </li></ul><ul><li>Work </li></ul><ul><li>Family </li></ul><ul><li>Trauma </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  22. 22. <ul><li>Caring for Aging Parents </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 1: Make Care giving a Team Effort </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Enjoy Your Marriage </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  23. 23. <ul><li>Depression </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 1: Fight the Depression </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Protect Your Marriage – and Yourself </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  24. 24. <ul><li>Job Loss </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 1: Set a New Budget – and New Priorities </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Support Each Other </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  25. 25. <ul><li>Weight Gain </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 1: Feel Good about Your Body </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Take care of your health and reduce your spouse’s anxiety </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  26. 26. COMPLETION <ul><li>Recreating and Enjoying Life </li></ul><ul><li>Continuity and Loss </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  27. 27. The Missions <ul><li>Mission 1: Keep Your Marriage Growing </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 2: Play – And Be in the Moment </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 3: Share a New Sense of Meaning and Purpose and Prepare for Loss </li></ul><ul><li>Mission 4: Reorganize Your Time, Your Territory, Your Tasks </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>
  28. 28. Applications for Workshops <ul><li></li></ul>Applications in Counseling Couples
  29. 29. Thank you! <ul><li>The 7 Stages of Marriages provide a lifelong guide to identifying and exploring the missions, challenges and rewards of the stages of marriage. </li></ul><ul><li>Congratulations </li></ul><ul><li>WISH YOU A HAPPY MARRIED LIFE </li></ul><ul><li></li></ul>