Write Tighter: Get to the Point and Save Millions

1. Write Tight (er) May 21, 2015  Marcia Riefer Johnston    marcia_r_johnston@me.com  @MarciaRJohnston #ConfabMN Get to the Point  and Save Millions

2. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks

3. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What we’ll cover

4. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean (and not mean)? What we’ll cover

5. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean (and not mean)? Why do I care? What we’ll cover

6. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean (and not mean)? Why do I care? How can I write more concisely? What we’ll cover

7. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean (and not mean)? Fast, pain-free technique Why do I care? How can I write more concisely? What we’ll cover

8. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks #ConfabMN

9. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks #ConfabMN No headline?

10. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks #ConfabMN No headline? No bullets?

11. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks #ConfabMN No headline? No bullets? No verbiage?

12. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks #ConfabMN No headline? No bullets? No verbiage? How concise!

13. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Most often I talk about content as text because text is everywhere … text is different … text is messy as hell.” —Kristina Halvorson Content Strategy for the Web

14. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise not mean?

15. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise not mean? Short

16. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise not mean? Short Why?

19. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “A good speech [read, your text] should be like a woman's skirt; long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.” —Winston Churchill

20. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Make text, like a skirt,   as long as needed.

21. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Not robospeak.

22. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Not robospeak.

23. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Not robospeak. Push button.

24. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Not robospeak. Push button. Push the button.

25. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Not robospeak. Keep the the. Push button. Push the button.

26. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean?

27. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean? Minimal

28. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What does concise mean? Minimal What?

29. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Minimal

30. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Enough to meet your audiences’ needs Minimal

31. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Enough to meet your audiences’ needs Enough to accomplish your purpose Minimal

32. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Enough to meet your audiences’ needs Enough to accomplish your purpose No more Minimal

33. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Enough to meet your audiences’ needs Enough to accomplish your purpose No more No less Minimal

34. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Write Tight(er):  ATime-Saving, Pain-Free Technique for SellingYourself,   Your Company, or   Your Products through   Your Words

35. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Audience needs: “What’s in it for me?” Write Tight(er):  ATime-Saving, Pain-Free Technique for SellingYourself,   Your Company, or   Your Products through   Your Words

36. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Audience needs: “What’s in it for me?” My purpose: Get you here Write Tight(er):  ATime-Saving, Pain-Free Technique for SellingYourself,   Your Company, or   Your Products through   Your Words

37. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks No more Audience needs: “What’s in it for me?” My purpose: Get you here Write Tight(er):  ATime-Saving, Pain-Free Technique for SellingYourself,   Your Company, or   Your Products through   Your Words

38. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks No more No less Audience needs: “What’s in it for me?” My purpose: Get you here Write Tight(er):  ATime-Saving, Pain-Free Technique for SellingYourself,   Your Company, or   Your Products through   Your Words

44. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What concise means

45. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Questions? What concise means

46. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Why do I care?

47. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Why do I care? “Usability was dramatically higher for the concise version [of the website]— 58% better.” —Jakob Nielsen www.nngroup.com/articles/how-users-read-on-the-web

48. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Why do I care? “Usability was dramatically higher for the concise version [of the website]— 58% better.” —Jakob Nielsen www.nngroup.com/articles/how-users-read-on-the-web

49. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Why else do I care?

50. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Cheaper to translate Why else do I care?

51. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Cheaper to translate Easier to understand Why else do I care?

52. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Cheaper to translate Easier to understand Why else do I care? More engaging

53. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Cheaper to translate Easier to understand Why else do I care? More engaging More useful on small screens

55. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Write Tight (er)

60. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks This is your toothbrush when it’s new.The blue bristles are blue all the way to their tips. This is your toothbrush when it’s ready to replace.The blue bristles have turned half white.

62. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Philips Sonicare™ toothbrush

63. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Is your text translated?

64. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks How much can a word cost?

65. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost?

66. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? words6

67. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? words6

68. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? You may need a loan. words6

69. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? You may need a loan. words6 5 words

70. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? You may need a loan. words6 5 words

71. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word

72. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word

73. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word

74. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word

75. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 1 sentence, 1 language

76. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 1 sentence, 1 language

77. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

78. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 * the size of a Harry Potter novel You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

79. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 * the size of a Harry Potter novel $ 2,500.00 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

80. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 * the size of a Harry Potter novel $ 2,500.00 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 25 languages 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

81. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 * the size of a Harry Potter novel $ 2,500.00 $ 62,500.00 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 25 languages 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

82. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks You may be needing a loan. How much can a word cost? Translation cost (or savings): $ 0.25 * the size of a Harry Potter novel $ 2,500.00 $ 62,500.00 You may need a loan. words6 5 words 1 word 10,000 sentences,* 25 languages 10,000 sentences,* 1 language 1 sentence, 1 language

84. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so?

85. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough 

86. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language 

87. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database)

88. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word

89. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word Full price

90. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word “fuzzy” match Full price

91. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word “fuzzy” match Full price Pay less

92. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word “fuzzy” match “perfect” match Full price Pay less

93. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks per word? How so? Close enough  Varies with the language  Depends on the translation memory (database) unrecognized word “fuzzy” match “perfect” match You still pay! Full price Pay less

95. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What concise means Why I care

96. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Questions? What concise means Why I care

97. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Whether or not you translate,

98. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Whether or not you translate, whatever size your page or screen,

99. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Whether or not you translate, whatever size your page or screen, you owe it to yourself to ask …

100. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks How can I write more concisely?

101. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Dump these words!*

102. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Dump these words!* *unless you need them

103. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

104. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

105. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

106. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

107. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

108. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

109. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

110. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

111. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

112. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

113. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

114. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

115. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

116. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular verbiage Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

117. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular verbiage any other verbiage or unneeded words that you can pitch Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique

121. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular verbiage any other verbiage or unneeded words that you can pitch Dump these words!* *unless you need them Fast, pain-free technique I cover the rest   in my workshop.

122. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Jay Firestone Content Strategist Facebook

123. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks be-verbs

124. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks be be-verbs

125. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be be-verbs

126. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be are be-verbs

127. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be am are be-verbs

128. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be was am are be-verbs

129. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be has beenwas am are be-verbs

130. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be will be has beenwas am are be-verbs

131. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is be will have  been being will be has beenwas am are be-verbs

132. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks be-verb. Any form of the verb to be— namely, am, are, be, been, being, is, was, and were—whether used as an auxiliary verb or as a main verb. —Bryan Garner Garner’s Modern American Usage

135. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks See be-verbs.

139. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Start seeing be-verbs!

140. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Examples

141. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Bias tape has the advantage of being able to be applied smoothly around curves as well as straight.”

147. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks The ﬁx might not be self-evident.

148. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks The ﬁx might not be self-evident.

149. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks The ﬁx might not be self-evident. You have to think.

150. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks The ﬁx might not be self-evident. You have to think. (Not too painful.)

156. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “A scheme of which every part promises delight can never be successful.” —Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

157. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “A scheme of which every part promises delight can never be successful.” —Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

160. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Audit logs are proof that no data breach has occurred.

161. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Audit logs are proof that no data breach has occurred.

162. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Our team wants to be predictive.

163. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Our team wants to be predictive.

164. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Our team wants to be predictive. What does the team want to do?

165. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Skydiving was fun.

166. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Skydiving was fun.

167. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Skydiving was fun. What happened?

168. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after.” —Ernest Hemingway,   Death in the Afternoon

169. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after.” —Ernest Hemingway,   Death in the Afternoon

170. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks www.hemingwayapp.com

174. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What it is is…

175. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “What was found was that access points on maps were not reﬂective or accurate for where they are.”

176. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “What was found was that access points on maps were not reﬂective or accurate for where they are.”

177. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “There are known knowns.These are things we know that we know.There are known unknowns.That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns.There are things we don’t know we don’t know.” (attributed to a one-time US secretary of defense)

178. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “There are known knowns.These are things we know that we know.There are known unknowns.That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns.There are things we don’t know we don’t know.” (attributed to a one-time US secretary of defense)

179. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “There are known knowns.These are things we know that we know.There are known unknowns.That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns.There are things we don’t know we don’t know.” (attributed to a one-time US secretary of defense) We don’t know diddly—

180. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “There are known knowns.These are things we know that we know.There are known unknowns.That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns.There are things we don’t know we don’t know.” (attributed to a one-time US secretary of defense) We don’t know diddly— except to avoid (most) be-verbs.

181. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks YOUR WORDS

182. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular verbiage any other verbiage or unneeded words that you can pitch Dump these words!* *unless you need them

183. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks weak be-verbs (is, was, were, will be, have been, am, are) -ly words (& other vapid adverbs) very, such, so (& other empty intensiﬁers) not, no (& other negative words) the fact that just begin to, try to, tend to, in order to period of time in light of, in spite of, in terms of (& of in general) proverbial different (as in many different, 36 different) particular verbiage any other verbiage or unneeded words that you can pitch Dump these words!* *unless you need them I cover the rest   in my workshop.

184. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Word count Cost to translate into 1 language 25 languages x 10,000 sentences (Harry Potter novel) BEFORE Your original text here with more words than you need. 10 $2.50 $62.50 $625,000.00 AFTER Your tighter text here. 4 $1.00 $25.00 $250,000.00 Savings 60% $1.50 $37.50 $375,000.00

185. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Elizabeth Rich Director of Digital Content Produce Marketing Association

186. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks BEFORE Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after. AFTER Write when you know something; and not before; and not too damned much after.

187. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Word count BEFORE Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after. 17 AFTER Write when you know something; and not before; and not too damned much after. 14 Savings 18%

188. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Word count Cost to translate into 1 language BEFORE Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after. 17 $4.25 AFTER Write when you know something; and not before; and not too damned much after. 14 $3.50 Savings 18% $0.75

189. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Word count Cost to translate into 1 language 25 languages BEFORE Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after. 17 $4.25 $106.25 AFTER Write when you know something; and not before; and not too damned much after. 14 $3.50 $87.50 Savings 18% $0.75 $18.75

190. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Word count Cost to translate into 1 language 25 languages x 10,000 sentences (Harry Potter novel) BEFORE Write when there is something that you know; and not before; and not too damned much after. 17 $4.25 $106.25 $1,062,500.00 AFTER Write when you know something; and not before; and not too damned much after. 14 $3.50 $87.50 $875,000.00 Savings 18% $0.75 $18.75 $187,500.00

191. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Email me for the spreadsheet:   marcia_r_johnston@me.com

192. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Use be-verbs when they serve a purpose.

194. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks what?

195. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks is

196. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Content is something you can run an ad alongside of.” —Nora Ephron, I Remember Nothing

199. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Content is something you can run an ad alongside of.” —Nora Ephron, I Remember Nothing content

200. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks “Content is something you can run an ad alongside of.” —Nora Ephron, I Remember Nothing content ads

201. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Be-verbs are everywhere. See?

202. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Be-verbs are everywhere. See?

205. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Now available Start seeing be-verbs.HowToWriteEverything.com

206. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Start seeing be-verbs.HowToWriteEverything.com

209. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Email me for the bumper sticker:   marcia_r_johnston@me.com

214. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Want to make this technique even faster?

217. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Try this.

218. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Adjectives • absolutely certain, absolutely essential, absolutely guaranteed, completely necessary, totally sure • bald-headed • best ever, ﬁrst ever • blue in color, few in number, long in duration, nubbly in texture, round in shape, slovenly in appearance, short in height, slow in speed, small in size, tall in stature • booked solid • exact same, same exact, same identical • ﬁlled to capacity • incredible to believe, visible to the eye, warm to the touch

219. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Nouns • actual experience, actual fact • added bonus • advance notice, advance planning, advance preview, advance reservations, advance warning • all-time favorite, all-time record • alternative choice • anonymous stranger • annual anniversary • armed gunman • artiﬁcial prosthesis • autobiography of her own life, biography of his life

220. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Nouns • actual experience, actual fact • added bonus • advance notice, advance planning, advance preview, advance reservations, advance warning • all-time favorite, all-time record • alternative choice • anonymous stranger • annual anniversary • armed gunman • artiﬁcial prosthesis • autobiography of her own life, biography of his life And that’s just the a’s.

221. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Verbs • add an additional • aid and abet, cease and desist, pick and choose • allow you to be able to • always include • ask the question • assemble together, attach together, blend together, collaborate together, combine together, confer together, connect together, cooperate together, fuse together, gather together, join together, integrate together, meet together, merge together, mingle together, mix together, pool together, share together, splice together

222. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Odds and Ends  • 6 a.m. in the morning, 10 p.m. in the evening, twelve noon, twelve midnight  • and etc.  • ATM machine, GOP party, GRE exam, HIV virus,   ISBN number, LCD display, PIN number, RAM memory, UPC code—and my favorite: Please RSVP

226. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What concise means Why I care

227. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks What concise means Why I care How to write concisely

228. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Questions? What concise means Why I care How to write concisely

229. Story time

230. Story time Water dispenser

231. Story time Water dispenser Buttons

232. Story time Water dispenser Buttons Quick reference

234. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Concise = good ... right?

235. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Three-minute video

239. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks If conciseness doesn’t ﬁx it,   change what you’re saying.

241. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks For more on concise writing and much, much more

244. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks For more on concise writing and much, much more powerful

245. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks For more on concise writing and much, much more powerful

247. #ConfabMN @MarciaRJohnston Write Tight(er) www.Writing.Rocks Think this is small?

Write Tighter: Get to the Point and Save Millions

Write Tighter: Get to the Point and Save Millions

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Write Tighter: Get to the Point and Save Millions