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Family Presentation

Published in: Healthcare
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  1. 1. Dr. Louise A. Stanger 2017
  2. 2. Greetings Turn To Your neighbor Introduce Yourself Say one or two words that pop up in your head when you say the word Family
  3. 3. How is your Family Really Doing? Talking and Listening Expressing Feeling Adapting to Change Sharing Time Together Who’s in Charge ?
  4. 4. How is Your Family Doing? Balancing Closeness and Difference Accepting Difference Seeing The Positive Effective Problem Solving
  5. 5. How are you feeling? Confusion Anger Saddness Love 

  6. 6. –Johnny Appleseed “Type a quote here.”
  7. 7. 6 Pillars of Families Stengths
  8. 8. Communication Caring Health- Spirituality Commitment - Resilence
  9. 9. What Research has taught Brene Brown This research has taught me that if we really want to start practicing compassion, we have to start by setting boundaries and holding people accountable for their behavior
  10. 10. B Interactions with others-How far can we go with comfort in a relationship
  11. 11. Judeo-Christian Beliefs Stresses Importance Of Living Life as true self Connect God to all things You do not have to stay with People who Mistreat You PEOPLE-PlACES -THINGS- THOUGHTS -FEELINGS & ACTION
  12. 12. What is a boundary ? What is ok-What is not Ok? What was ok before Treatment? What is not Ok before? What gets confusing ? Some of my boundaries are today………….
  13. 13. Whats a Relationship ? Family Friends Work School Exercise Church-Mosque-Synagogue
  14. 14. Boundaries and Relationships Physical Closeness-Touching- Privacy-mail -bathroom- clothes-shelter-physical differences-Time -energy Emotional -Beliefs-Thoughts- Secrets-Rules-Sexuality-Time Alone-Gender Preferences Spirtuality-Definition of , Personal Experiences and Practices
  15. 15. Family Fusion Lack of Personal Space Talking Over Controlling Blurred Lines Blaming Finishing Others Sentences Denying Recusing
  16. 16. Stories and Confabulations
  17. 17. Parallel Processes Families Grow alongside of their loved ones The truth is all parents fail their children The task Is growing to find their own ways of Parenting ourselves To Parent From a Place of love
  18. 18. Recovery Issues Issues Early Middle Advanced Grieving Identify ones losses Learning to grieve Grieve past and present losses Neglecting ones own needs Realization of needs Beginning to get needs met Getting needs met Being Over responsible Identifying boundaries Setting limits Responsible for self-clear boundaries Low self-esteem Identify Sharing Affirming – improved SE Control Identify Taking responsibility Responsibility& letting go All or none thinking Recognize & identify Learning there are choices Multicolored world Being Real Recognize Risking being real Being real
  19. 19. Recovery Issues Issues Early Middle Advanced Trust Trust can be helpful Selective Trusting Trusting appropriately Feeling Recognizing & Identifying Experiencing Observing & Using Hi Tolerance inappropriate beh. Questioning behaviors Learning Knowing & having safe folks Abandonment & Conflict Recognizing & Identifying Grieving & Resolving Freedom From & work thru current conflicts Giving and Receiving Love Defining: What is love Practicing Refining, loving self, higher power Dependence & Independence Identifying Learning/ Practicing Being healthy
  20. 20. Stages Of Change
  21. 21. What type of Listening Skills do you have ? Open Ended Questions Echo Key Words Paraphrase Body Language
  22. 22. Roadblocks To Listening Personal Roadblocks I am ill-kids are ill Had a fight with my partner Have lots of work My phone is ringing I am making dinner etc
  23. 23. Roadblocks to Listening Ordering, Directing, Commanding Warning or Threatening Giving advice, suggestions, solutions Persuading with logic, arguing Moralizing or preaching Disagreeing, judging, criticizing, blaming
  24. 24. Listen with Emotional Attunement Be Quiet and actively listen Respond Do Not React Respond with a statement tjhat accurately reflects
  25. 25. Reflections Repeating what someone has just said Rephase-Substitute a New Word Paraphase Reflecting a feeling-rephrase a feeling not necessarily the content- Sounds like you are struggling, are frustrated etc
  26. 26. Sometimes we exaggerate We do so as to get loved ones attention If You exaggerate be careful not to be sarcastic So if I hear you correctly your son or daughter, husband wife needs you to bring him So if I hear you correctly, you want to………
  27. 27. Sometimes we will ask about what’s Good or not so Good Good things about Changing behavior Good things about changing behavior Not so good things about behavior Not so good things about changing behavior
  28. 28. Other times we will Explore Ambivalence So one the one hand you want to stop smoking and on the other hand you do not So on the one hand you say you are angry and yet you have little emotion On the one hand you want to be able to leave the children with your wife BUT you are afraid to On the one hand you want Mark to get well and be a part of the family and on the other you never want him to return to your home
  29. 29. Signs of Resistance Filibustering Taking Over Cutting Off Denying Blaming Minimizing Catastrophes Pessimism Demanding Arguing Challenging- Demanding Interrupting- Side Stepping Resisting Discounting Hostility Discouraging Ignoring Inattention Not-talking
  30. 30. Strategies for Evoking Change Ask Evocative Questions Why do you want to make this change (desire) How might you go about that ) (ability) What are the best reasons for doing that?( Reasons) So what do you think you will do (Committment)
  31. 31. Change Strategies Ask For Elaboration -In What ways Ask for specific Examples -Tell me what you did, when wa the last time that happened Was there ever a time that things were good / What was that like for you?
  32. 32. Change What will your life look like What is the best thing that could happen? What is the worst? On a scale of 1 to 10 how motivated are you-how confident are you Discover Goals and values Join up and come along side
  33. 33. Be an Explorer Explore Suspend Judgement and Fear Affirm Summarize -And if I heard you correctly, son, daughter, wife, husband, brother, sister
  34. 34. Words That Matter Yes No OH Really Whatever
  35. 35. Crucial Conversations When goals are defined by your loved one , Conversations have begun Compliments _positive Verb or reaction to seeing your loved one Indirect-The color of your shirt is lovely Self Compliment-I am proud ofgoing to Alanon
  36. 36. What is Courage? Telling Our Story and not being Immune to Criticism Listening without Judging
  37. 37. Let’s Take a Few Minutes Lets Practice Listening Skills How are you today? What are your major concerns? How do you handle disagreements with your loved ones?
  38. 38. Letting Go