In a research article by
psychologists Hewitt and Flett, Perfectionism has been categorized into: 1. Self-oriented perfectionism: Excessively high standards on self, evaluation and self-censure. 2. Other-oriented perfectionism: Excessively high standards on significant others. 3. Socially-prescribed perfectionism: People feel that unrealistic high standards are being placed on them from significant others.
It is much better to
launch something that is GOOD ENOUGHrather than waiting, getting stuck and not launching something perfect.
Action Tips: Become aware of
and cast aside beliefs that predispose you towards unrealistic perfectionism. Question the validity of assumptions that these beliefs are based upon and choose new beliefs.
According to psychologist Kenneth Rice
and his colleagues from the Journal of Cognitive Psychology: “The defining feature of perfectionism appears to be high personal standards. The distinction between having high standards and the affective, intrapersonal, and interpersonal responses to living up to those standards distinguish adaptive from maladaptive perfectionists.”
Hence, they portray themselves as
being deficient in their own minds and get stuck from taking action to auto-correct. According to research professor Brené Brown, author of The Gifts of Imperfection, people who feel shame attribute it as a character flaw and cannot distinguish between the action that caused the shame and themselves.
Do you have a subconscious
need for safety and control. A lot of perfectionism is based on trust and safety issues that we may have and are still unresolved.
In a research study on
perfectionism and psychological control by Soenens et al., maladaptive perfectionism, self-esteem and depression in adolescents were strongly related to the levels of psychological control that they experienced from their parents.
8. Set Up Rules and
Deadlines for Your Project: Structures that work “B%+ I .- ,#.r$($& +'.+ p#rf#*+(!$ ()$'+ w'.+ -.++#r). I$ f.*+, (+') +'# v#r0 +'($& +'.+ *.$ "#)+r!0 0!% (f 0!% ,#+ (+.” ― E-(,0 G(ﬃ$
Rules can sound like: “My
time to write today is one hour and during that one hour I will NOT EDIT or go back to correct and make things better.”
Allow for Creative Perfectionism: Perfectionism
in a small sub-set of activities or just one task. Complete other tasks with relatively less amount of perfectionism and you will get to see the costs vs benefits of being a non-perfectionist.
9. Getting Realistic about Your
Approach to Life and Tasks: Dropping Standards “W# fr#;# %p b#*.%)# w# 8p#*+ . *#r+.($ r#)%,+ !r b#*.%)# w# w.$+ +'($&) +! b# p#rf#*+.” ― B#r$(# G,.))-.$, 4# D%"# .$" +'# Z#$ M.)+#r
One of the issues that
perfectionists face is getting overly caught up in a TINYdetail that may not be very important.
Create Structural Tension: According to
Robert Fritz, author of Path of least Resistance, when you know where you are at and where you would like to be or go very clearly, you create structural tension that propels resolution.
11. Become a Scientist in
Your own Life: Observe, Experiment and Change the Core Concepts behind Why you are being a Perfectionist
Recognize those cues and replace
them with motivations with a higher purpose such as giving great value to others... Dismantle the foundations of perfectionism. Perfectionism is driven and triggered by cues such as fear, performance, stress and expectations.
SUMMARY 1. Awareness and Realization That
you get Stuck by Excessive Perfectionism. 2. There are different types of Perfectionism. 3. Scratching Below the Surface: Cast Aside the Past Beliefs that Sustain Perfectionism . 4. Dismantle the Anxiety and Stress behind Perfectionism. 5. Peeling off the Layers of Perfectionism- The Three Primal Problems: Fear, Self- Worth and Shame. 6. Blame, Self-Criticism and Criticism From Others: Beware of The Judgment Trap. 7. Master Controller of Your Universe: Perfectionism caused by Trust and Safety Issues. 8. Set Up Rules and Deadlines for Your Projects and to counter perfectionism. 9. Getting Realistic about Your Approach to Life and Tasks: Drop Standards. 10. Dismantling the Process of Moving Forward: Take Small Steps to overcome Perfectionism. 11. Become a Scientist in Your own Life: Observe, Experiment and Change the Core Concepts behind Why you are being a Perfectionist. 12. A new Model: Choose Excellence and Value the Process.
THANK YOU! Are You Launching
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