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Outlook of a father


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Outlook of a father

  1. 1. Outlook of a Father“If his sons are honored, he is not aware of it; if they are in disgrace, he does notknow about them. Only his own flesh pains him, and his soul grieves for him.” JOB14:21At this time of Father’s Day, we celebrate honoring grandfathers, fathers andcelebrating fatherhood and paternal bond. For nearly one century, families havecelebrated Father’s Day. A Presidential Proclamation by President Lyndon B. Johnson in1966 designated the third Sunday of June as Father’s Day. President Richard M. Nixonsigned a 1972 bill, making the holiday legal, official and permanent, (Linda AnnNickerson, Yahoo Contributor Network).Fathers influence our society, no matter how simple it may be. Done through theirwork and raring of their children, they all contribute to society.Like a farmer, fathers plow and plant the seeds while mothers sprinkle the waterduring growth. Fathers straighten the branches and prune the leaves. He cuts down thetree in order to sprout again and for its tender shoots not to cease. Fathers could be theseed. This seed comes as knowledge, principles, and philosophies in life that a fathershould pass on to their children. The seed could be the hard work and sacrifice for thesake of his children. Fathers are not just role models for their children; they live withthem through cooperation and mutual respect. Fathers should strive to seek first tounderstand their children to be understood. Understanding comes from feedback. It is nota matter of who is right; it is a matter of which one works best for both. It is not I win andyou lose. In this generation of digital technology, it is win-win that counts.
  2. 2. Together with mothers, fathers build confidence into his children. Children look atfathers for wisdom. “Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that gettethunderstanding.” Proverbs 3:13. When this happens children receive their father’sblessing. Fathers are not perfect, but not always wrong. Being the older one, he passedthe test of time. What he says has been proven right, because he has learned this from hismistakes. He has shaped his life by his failures and victories.Fathers do strange things to encourage their children to excel. Realize that father andchild form a team system, which is composed of parts that are inherent components of thesystem. The behavior of the system, when all the components play, is different fromwhen both components doesn’t participate. The father-child team undergoes learningcurve before performing. As in team building, they go through, Forming, Storming,Norming, and Performing stages. Depending on their learning curve and motivation, thisprocess could take a long time. Others may take a shorter time if they have that passion.In my case, my stage from forming, storming, to norming took half of my life. I think thatthis happens to all parents. For lack of experience and time, their family building happensconcurrently as they both learn each other as husband and wife. Fathers are in the processof learning all the time. Up to now at 77 years old, I’m still learning my life, my wife andmy children. It is a process of ongoing improvement.Fathers are disappointed if they can’t motivate their children. However, realize thatmotivation is driven by people’s want and that it’s hard to motivate children if fathersdon’t know their children’s want. People are born with intrinsic motivation, self-esteem,desire to learn, creativity, joy in accomplishing, and the need for freedom and belonging.As people are in a state of want all the time, children are. Their want is driven by their
  3. 3. needs. After that need is satisfied, their next unsatisfied need will drive their motivation.Understanding this theory (Competitive Edge book, 2011, by Jose Villanueva Alcedo,page 11, Publish America, USA), a father can only provide the environment, but he couldnot directly motivate his children.A father gives courage in trying times. He offers steadfast bold faith in God and solidleadership in the home through scriptural teaching. A father’s affirmation of his strongfaith comes during the celebration of Father’s Day.Celebrating Father’s Day encompasses various practices of family gathering, greetingcards and gifts. Based on my upbringing, I’m used to just a sincere word of love andencouragement for a father, like me, to keep going. I love inspiring Bible verses as theScriptures clearly reveal. Following Promises for Fathers from the Bible:A Father’s Integrity: “I know, O my God, that you put hearts to the test and that youtake pleasure in uprightness.” 1 CHRONICLES 29: 17, (NAB)A Father’s Courage: “I command you: be firm and steadfast! Do not fear nor bedismayed, for the Lord, your God, is with you wherever you go.” JOSHAU 1:9 (NAB)A Father’s Father: “Sing to God, praise the divine name; exalt the rider of theclouds. Rejoice before this God whose name is the Lord. Father of the fatherless,defender of widows – this is the God whose abode is holy.” PSALM 68:5-6 (NAB)Father’s Compassion: “As the father has compassion on his children, so the Lordhas compassion on the faithful.” PSALM 103:13 (NAB)Father’s Legacy: “For the Lord will defend their cause, and will plunder the lives ofthose who plunder them. Be not friendly with a hotheaded man, nor the companion of awrathful man.” PROVERBS 23:23-24 (NAB)
  4. 4. A Father’s Wisdom: “On the way of wisdom I direct you, I lead you onstraightforward paths. When you walk, your step will not be impeded, and should yourun, you will not stumble. Hold fast to instruction, never let her go, keep her, for she isyour life.” PROVERBS 4: 11-13 (NAB)A Father’s Blessing: “When a man walks in integrity and justice, happy are hischildren after him. “ PROVERBS 20:7 (NAB)A Father’s Fruit: “In contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience,kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”GALATIANS 5:22-23 (NAB)A Father’s Love: “ Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, love is notpompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoiceswith the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, theywill cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing.” 1 CORINTHIANS 13: 4-8(NAB)This is what Father’s Day means to me. Thank you all for having me.