Beginners' Mini Guide to Confidence Part 1

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Does a lack of Confidence hold you back in your work, home and social Life? If so you'll love this free guide on Confidence and the really good news is that you're actually more Confident than you think you are. This practical mini guide to Confidence will help you realise this and begin to change how you think about your Confidence and how simple ways how you can develop and begin to build your Confidence.

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Beginners' Mini Guide to Confidence Part 1

  1. 1. Confidence – What is it and how do you get it?Part 1: What is confidence?Confidence means different things to different people, so to get youthinking here’s the Oxford English dictionary’s definition:"A feeling of self-assurance arising from an appreciation ofones own abilities or qualities"This is actually a very good definition of confidence, it means thatyou have a strong belief in yourself about what you’re capable ofdoing and to do it successfully. This changes depending on yoursituation and perception of confidence at any one time – soconfidence is a state of mind.Heres an example of what I mean by that. I worked with someonewho told me they "have no confidence", so I replied "OK, who tiedyour shoelaces this morning?" He paused, then looked at me in a
  2. 2. slightly confused way and said "Well I did of course!" I replied "So,how confident did you feel about tying your shoelaces?" The mansmiled, then laughed. I knew then, that he understood a little moreabout confidence.Confidence is more than just self belief in yourself, confidence is about“competence” what I mean by this is doing what you’re good at. Themore competence you have the more self belief you have, after all youknow what you’re doing. When you’re having a conversation andcatching up with friends, you probably have no problem in having aconversation, you know what to say and when to laugh – this iscompetence, which results in confidence.Competence makes up most of what people refer to as “confidence,” therest is made up of self belief. When you’re truly confident, you feelcomfortable in yourself and in any situation where you need confidence.You don’t need to be confident every second of every day. You onlyneed to be confident in situations where you need to be confident andthese situations don’t happen all the time.
  3. 3. At this point I think it’s important to mention what confidence isn’t.The people you see on the BBC show “the Apprentice” and anyonewho is overly loud and in your face ARE NOT confident – they’re justarrogant and cocky. These people have to over compensatebecause of their lack of confidence. They tend to put people downin front of others to make themselves seem better. I’d also like topoint out that you don’t need to be good looking, rich or famous tobe confident, anyone can be confident.Some of the most famous actors, comedians and singers are verydifferent in their personal life compared to their public life. FreddyMercury (you know, lead singer from Queen) was an out and outshowman on stage, he took over Live Aid and blew away all the otheracts (he was even immortalised in the closing ceremony of the London2012 Olympics and he’s been dead a few years now). Yet in his privatelife he was completely different - shy, introverted and spoke with a slightstutter.Perhaps, having read this you’ll think differently about what confidence isand may even realise that you’re actually more confident than you thinkyou are. In part 2 I’ll share with you 3 tips to boost your confidence.
  4. 4. _________________________________________________________If you have any issues regarding confidence that you’d like me to helpyou with, then please contact me for a free initial phone consultation.You can do so in complete confidence and I can work with you on a 1 to1 basis or come along to one of my workshopsJohn Blair – Confidence & Stress Management CoachTo find out more about John Blair, see his profile here:http://www.yesyoucanchange.co.uk/about-me/profile

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