A prayer to the
football gods for the
physical and mental
health of our 2010
Philadelphia Eagles…
Training camp is upon us once again. Last year it was a disaster – The
    death of our defensive coordinator, a few torn ...
Dear football gods, I’m not here to ask for a
championship – Those are earned. I’m not here to ask
for a the entire Cowboy...
The Eagles rolled the dice and let
the legendary (and still productive)
Brian Dawkins hit free agency,
hoping that another...
"Dan is [expletive]-ing
         devastated about
       Dawkins signing with
      Denver ... Dam Eagles R
            Re...
Trade me.



Unhappy with his contract, longtime Eagle
great Sheldon Brown requests a trade. He
then takes it to the next ...
It is revealed that Brian
Westbrook will need surgery
to have painful bone spurs
removed from his ankle. He
will miss all ...
Sean McDermott is
named Eagles
permanent defensive
coordinator, thus
confirming that Jim
Johnson, who is battling
cancer, ...
The Eagles hire Todd Pinkston as an intern (seriously).
Eagles' longtime defensive coordinator and legendary football man, Jim Johnson dies of cancer.
Side note - On the
                                  same day Jim
                                  Johnson dies, the top
...
On Eagles “Flight Night,”
starting standout MLB
Stewart Bradley tears
ACL, out for the season.
Juqua Parker and Todd
Herremans decide to take
a little break from the
rigors of training camp by
chilling in the dark wit...
Promising rookie TE
Cornelius Ingram
tears ACL, out for
the season.
Another injury. This time it's Todd Herremans
(back in the news again), with a stress
reaction, or a stress fracture, or s...
"Right now, I’m the starting free safety,
                       but there are so many games being
                       ...
Apparently
determining that
spending 19 months in
Leavenworth isn't
quite enough,
Commissioner Roger
Goodell decides that
...
In a Week 1 win over the Carolina Panthers, Donovan
McNabb suffers a cracked rib on a TD run on a questionable
late hit in...
The Eagles officially place
formerly projected
starting RT Shawn
Andrews on IR due to a
"sore back." Out for the
season, e...
In a game in Oakland, Jason Peters is injured.
His replacement, King Dunlap, asks the
Raiders nicely if they'll leave Dono...
Brian Westbrook suffers a concussion against the Redskins. He’ll have another one 3 weeks
later against the Chargers. He’l...
The season ending injuries continue. This time it’s Omar Gaither, with a lisfranc injury.
OK, so this one isn't football related, but the Phillies lose
to the Yankees in the World Series. This owner of this
truck...
Yet another one heads to the IR. Ellis Hobbs, serious neck injury, out for season.
In addition to losing Ellis Hobbs for the season, the Eagles
lose yet another CB, Joselio Hanson, to a suspension for
taki...
The Eagles place Jamaal
Jackson on IR, with…

Anyone? Bueller? An
ACL tear! This leaves
ONE offensive lineman
that will ha...
Starters that went on IR…
- RT Shawn Andrews
- MLB Stewart Bradley
- C Jamaal Jackson
                             The tot...
It’s now 2010, and already, right out of the shoot during OTA’s, we lose safety
Marlin Jackson. I mean… Come on… He never ...
So again, football gods,
what is it that we can do
to appease you?
Throw Kendra into a volcano?
Pay reparations to all those that had their careers
   cut short by the turf at Veterans Stadium?
Did McNabb do something?
 Are you a Rush Limbaugh
  fan? Because if so, we
   traded McNabb to the
      Redskins… See?
Or maybe you’re a big McNabb fan, and you’re punishing us for booing him at the
 draft 10+ years ago? That was just 30 idi...
Apologize to
Santa? It that
what this is? Are
you behind this,
Claus? People
have been feeling
bad for you since
1968. So ...
So please, football gods, let us know what we can do
   to make things right. We’re open for anything.




             ww...
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Eagles

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Eagles

  1. 1. A prayer to the football gods for the physical and mental health of our 2010 Philadelphia Eagles…
  2. 2. Training camp is upon us once again. Last year it was a disaster – The death of our defensive coordinator, a few torn ACL’s, an arrest, players with various complaints, and other nonsense. And it didn’t stop there - The injuries continued to mount up as the season progressed. Are the football gods behind all of this? Come on, man. That’s your teammate.
  3. 3. Dear football gods, I’m not here to ask for a championship – Those are earned. I’m not here to ask for a the entire Cowboys organization to be stricken with a vicious case of syphilis. I’m not here asking for any special luck at all. But in 2010, can we maybe not have the ridiculous amount of injuries/drama that we had in 2009? I’ll show you what I mean, in chronological order…
  4. 4. The Eagles rolled the dice and let the legendary (and still productive) Brian Dawkins hit free agency, hoping that another NFL team wouldn’t overpay him. Oops – Gamble backfires. Some Eagles fans are angry at first, then convince themselves that he couldn’t cover anymore. Later that day, the Eagles announce that they have signed Stacy Andrews to a 6 year, $38.9 million contract. Andrews needs crutches to get to his seat for the press conference. Yikes.
  5. 5. "Dan is [expletive]-ing devastated about Dawkins signing with Denver ... Dam Eagles R Retarted!!" The Eagles fire low-level employee Dan Leone for his remarks on facebook after Brian Dawkins bolted for Denver. Evidently, the Eagles had a tarty flavor, which they apparently lost, but then regained when Dawkins left… Hence – “Retarted.” I’m not exactly sure how losing Brian Dawkins would make the Eagles regain their “tarty” flavor, but Leone sure didn’t like it. Note to self – Don’t buy Dan Leone Sour Patch Kids for Easter.
  6. 6. Trade me. Unhappy with his contract, longtime Eagle great Sheldon Brown requests a trade. He then takes it to the next level by suggesting that Trent Cole and Mike Patterson should also be unhappy with their deals. Brown will eventually get his wish.
  7. 7. It is revealed that Brian Westbrook will need surgery to have painful bone spurs removed from his ankle. He will miss all of training camp.
  8. 8. Sean McDermott is named Eagles permanent defensive coordinator, thus confirming that Jim Johnson, who is battling cancer, will not coach the Eagles in 2009.
  9. 9. The Eagles hire Todd Pinkston as an intern (seriously).
  10. 10. Eagles' longtime defensive coordinator and legendary football man, Jim Johnson dies of cancer.
  11. 11. Side note - On the same day Jim Johnson dies, the top front page story on ESPN.com reads “Brett Favre tells Minnesota Vikings he’ll remain retired.” Johnson’s death is a mere footnote. Bang up job, ESPN. http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4362093
  12. 12. On Eagles “Flight Night,” starting standout MLB Stewart Bradley tears ACL, out for the season.
  13. 13. Juqua Parker and Todd Herremans decide to take a little break from the rigors of training camp by chilling in the dark with a couple young sluts in the shadiest van I've ever seen. Parker is arrested for possession of weed. Yes, this is the actual van
  14. 14. Promising rookie TE Cornelius Ingram tears ACL, out for the season.
  15. 15. Another injury. This time it's Todd Herremans (back in the news again), with a stress reaction, or a stress fracture, or something. He'll miss the first 5 games of 2009.
  16. 16. "Right now, I’m the starting free safety, but there are so many games being played that it’s getting irritating." Quintin Demps isn’t handed the started FS job on a platter, throws a hissy fit, ends up in Andy Reid’s doghouse all season. He’s beaten out by rookie 5th round draft pick Macho Harris.
  17. 17. Apparently determining that spending 19 months in Leavenworth isn't quite enough, Commissioner Roger Goodell decides that suspending Michael Vick for 2 games is juuuuuust the right amount of extra time Vick needs to be away from football to satisfy his debt to society. Isn’t it enough that we have to now deal with the idiots at PETA?
  18. 18. In a Week 1 win over the Carolina Panthers, Donovan McNabb suffers a cracked rib on a TD run on a questionable late hit in the endzone. He will miss the next 2 weeks.
  19. 19. The Eagles officially place formerly projected starting RT Shawn Andrews on IR due to a "sore back." Out for the season, eventually cut by the Eagles. Not to worry, Andrews fans – He’ll soon be drafted in the 3rd round by the UFL’s Omaha Nighthawks. Woohooooo! Overhead view of Andrews’ hair.
  20. 20. In a game in Oakland, Jason Peters is injured. His replacement, King Dunlap, asks the Raiders nicely if they'll leave Donovan McNabb alone. Despite promising to be their best friend, the Raiders instead decide to toss Dunlap around like a rag doll in route to the Eagles’ annual “Are you freaking kidding me?!?!?” embarrassing loss.
  21. 21. Brian Westbrook suffers a concussion against the Redskins. He’ll have another one 3 weeks later against the Chargers. He’ll never be a factor as an Eagle again, and will soon be cut.
  22. 22. The season ending injuries continue. This time it’s Omar Gaither, with a lisfranc injury.
  23. 23. OK, so this one isn't football related, but the Phillies lose to the Yankees in the World Series. This owner of this truck celebrates alone in his room with... well... himself.
  24. 24. Yet another one heads to the IR. Ellis Hobbs, serious neck injury, out for season.
  25. 25. In addition to losing Ellis Hobbs for the season, the Eagles lose yet another CB, Joselio Hanson, to a suspension for taking a diuretic. Pat Williams and Kevin Williams of the Vikings, as well as Will Smith and Charles Grant of the Saints also tested positive for a diuretic, but only Hanson draws a suspension. Thanks, Goodell.
  26. 26. The Eagles place Jamaal Jackson on IR, with… Anyone? Bueller? An ACL tear! This leaves ONE offensive lineman that will have started all 16 games - Wanna guess who? Hint - it's a guy that many thought wouldn't even make the team (myself included)... Winston Justice.
  27. 27. Starters that went on IR… - RT Shawn Andrews - MLB Stewart Bradley - C Jamaal Jackson The total carnage of Others on IR… - LB Omar Gaither - CB Ellis Hobbs the 2009 season - TE Cornelius Ingram - T Fenuki Tupou Starters that missed at least one full game due to injury… - QB Donovan McNabb (2 games) - RB Brian Westbrook (8 games) - WR Jeremy Maclin (1 game) - WR DeSean Jackson (1 game) - LT Jason Peters (1 game) - LG Todd Herremans (5 games) - RG Stacy Andrews (6 games) - OLB Chris Gocong (1 game) - OLB Akeem Jordan (4 games) Others that missed at least one full game due to injury… - WR Kevin Curtis (13 games) - QB Michael Vick (1 game, 2 more for suspension) - DE Victor Abiamiri (3 games) - CB Joselio Hanson (4 game suspension)
  28. 28. It’s now 2010, and already, right out of the shoot during OTA’s, we lose safety Marlin Jackson. I mean… Come on… He never even got to play a preseason game with us, and he ruptures his achilles tendon?!?!? Can we not start this again?
  29. 29. So again, football gods, what is it that we can do to appease you?
  30. 30. Throw Kendra into a volcano?
  31. 31. Pay reparations to all those that had their careers cut short by the turf at Veterans Stadium?
  32. 32. Did McNabb do something? Are you a Rush Limbaugh fan? Because if so, we traded McNabb to the Redskins… See?
  33. 33. Or maybe you’re a big McNabb fan, and you’re punishing us for booing him at the draft 10+ years ago? That was just 30 idiots and a retarded radio station host that isn’t even from Philly. We’ll gladly round them all up (especially the annoying guy with the face paint in the middle), and you can do with them as you please. Hell, you can take Eskin, too…
  34. 34. Apologize to Santa? It that what this is? Are you behind this, Claus? People have been feeling bad for you since 1968. So you got booed… Big effing deal. It was 40 years ago. Act like a man.
  35. 35. So please, football gods, let us know what we can do to make things right. We’re open for anything. www.bleedinggreennation.com

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