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Six new products we couldn’t possibly need


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They say innovation is the mother of necessity, but we’ve had no success thus far tracing the lineage of these six new products that someone, somewhere, thought were a necessary good idea.

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Six new products we couldn’t possibly need

  1. 1. Six new products we couldn’t possibly needThey say innovation is the mother ofnecessity, but we’ve had no success thusfar tracing the lineage of these six newproducts that someone, somewhere,thought were a necessary good idea.Debuted earlier this year at majorelectronics shows and destined to soonbe on store shelves near you, unlesssomeone has come to their senses, webring you six wacky new products thatprobably didn’t need a red carpetmoment. Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / By Jeff Jedras
  2. 2. Pop PhoneNative UnionJust the other day I said to myself“gee, my smartphone is too small,and I miss tangling my phone cordinto an unmanageable mess.”Well, now there’s a solution to myconvenience: the Native Union PopPhone. Described by the vendor as“an interpretation of the classic 50sBakelite design telephone,” for$39.99 when someone asks you cansay “why yes, that is a ridiculousold-fashioned telephone handset in my pocket.”Call me when I can plug a rotary dialer into my micro USB port.
  3. 3. Cell-Mate Accessories & More Inc. Think the concerns about cell phone radiation are nervous nellie malarkey and want to prove it to the world? Think wearing a Bluetooth handset just isn’t annoying your friends enough? The answer is simple: duct tape your cell phone to your head.If you’re worried about pulling out hair though, there’s always the Cell-Mate.Hey, it’s from a company that built an automatic vegetable peeler, so you knowthey know what they’re doing.
  4. 4. MP4 Player with Breathalyzer,Pest Repeller and FlashlightSATYConvergence 1.0 (a term I’ve just now madeup…you’re welcome) brought functions such as anMP3 player, camera and telephone into one device –the smartphone. Well, hold onto your pants becausehere’s Convergence 2.0, bringing together functionsthat have absolutely nothing at all in common.Have you ever been watching an old episode of Gleeon your MP4 player while drinking heavily andwondered, am I legally intoxicated or are thosemosquitos biting me? Really, you have? Well, nowSATY can help you with all of that with one convergeddevice.Also, it has a flashlight.
  5. 5. Wandant Fujitsu Big data, meet the family dog. Rover, meet big data. You’ll need to pick up that new, larger external hard drive because Fujitsu wants to give you all the canine big data you can wag a tail at, with Wandant.Basically, you strap this doggy pedometer to Fido and your dog’s steps aretracked. Also, thermo-hygrometer sensors measure temperature changes in yourdog’s home environment. You can download 14 days worth of data onto yoursmartphone and into the cloud (where else) for later analysis on your desktop.For that, of course, we’ll need doggy analytics. Or, you know, won’t.
  6. 6. Smart AppliancesPanasonicYour toaster can’t be a wireless hotspot yet, butthanks to Panasonic your fridge will soon becloud-enabled. Unfortunately, you’ll still need togo to the grocery store as there’s no app yet todownload a tub of Haagen Dazs into your fridge.There is an Android app for your smartphone soyou can call your fridge while you’re at work toask if it’s still running though (but if so, you’dbetter go catch it).Forget Android though. Stay tuned for the Apple iFridge: it will be smaller, moreexpensive, and heavily marketed.
  7. 7. iPhone bottle opener case Opena Sadly, there’s no smartphone app that can open your bottle of brew. There is, however, a smartphone case that can thanks to Opena, and its iPhone case with slide-out bottle opener. The company says it’s the world’s iPhone case that opens beer bottlesand, while usually I’m skeptical of such vendor claims, I totally believe this one.It comes in black and white cases so people can see that yes, you’re an iPhoneowner and therefore, you’re cool. And then they see you slide out the bottleopener, and all that respect disappears.