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The Balanced Male

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"The Balanced Male" is an interactive presentation for men to help them be happier, deal more effectively with stress and become better relationship partners. Not too lofty of goals, huh?

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The Balanced Male

  1. 1. JASON FIERSTEIN, MA, LPC COUNSELOR FOR MEN PARADISE VALLEY COMMUNITY COLLEGE NOVEMBER 17, 2008
  2. 2. THE BALANCED MALE HEALTHY FROM THE INSIDE OUT JASON FIERSTEIN, MA, LPC COUNSELOR FOR MEN PARADISE VALLEY COMMUNITY COLLEGE NOVEMBER 17, 2008
  3. 3. What does balance mean to you?
  4. 4. What We’ll Talk About Today: • Balancing Your Relationships and Communication • Your Keys to a School Life in Balance • Your Health: Inside and Out • Beat Stress • Food and Mood • Good Mental Health for Men • The Messages That Hold Us Back from a Balanced Life
  5. 5. Understanding Your Values
  6. 6. The Relationship Balance • Needs and feelings instead of... • Men don’t talk to other men this way! Are you crazy? • The link between anger and depression in men • Picking the right people for you that help balance your life • Dropping masks and being real
  7. 7. • Conflict with others - How Not To Communicate • Avoid the problem/stuff your feelings • Fighting/criticizing to get what you want • Linear vs. Circular: Men vs. Women’s Communication Styles • Technology and Communication: Help or Hinderance? The Communication Balance
  8. 8. Physical Emotional Behavioral Signs of Stress
  9. 9. Physical Emotional Behavioral Headaches Stomach Problems Muscle Aches/tension Flushed/warm face Increased heart rate Decreased/increased appetite Decreased/increased sleep Increased muscle/joint pain Being ill more than usual Signs of Stress
  10. 10. Physical Emotional Behavioral Headaches Stomach Problems Muscle Aches/tension Flushed/warm face Increased heart rate Decreased/increased appetite Decreased/increased sleep Increased muscle/joint pain Being ill more than usual Increased Substance Use (cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, caffeine) Isolate/Withdraw from people More aggressive/yelling, swearing Throwing things, fighting Increased/decreased eating Decreased activity level Talking more/less Signs of Stress
  11. 11. Physical Emotional Behavioral Headaches Stomach Problems Muscle Aches/tension Flushed/warm face Increased heart rate Decreased/increased appetite Decreased/increased sleep Increased muscle/joint pain Being ill more than usual Sad Angry Impatient, irritable Feeling guilty Nervous/anxious Lose interest in things Hard to concentrate Hopelessness Thoughts of suicide/homicide Increased Substance Use (cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, caffeine) Isolate/Withdraw from people More aggressive/yelling, swearing Throwing things, fighting Increased/decreased eating Decreased activity level Talking more/less Signs of Stress
  12. 12. Tips on Dealing With School Stress • Stay Organized! Pace Yourself and Plan Ahead • Exercise (It’s Free) • Your Body Speaking Stress • Time Management Is The Key • Know your Tipping Point • Why You Don’t Ignore Your Stress After You’ve Recognized it
  13. 13. Tips on Dealing With School Stress • Stay Organized! Pace Yourself and Plan Ahead • Exercise (It’s Free) • Your Body Speaking Stress • Time Management Is The Key • Know your Tipping Point • Why You Don’t Ignore Your Stress After You’ve Recognized it
  14. 14. Tips on Dealing With School Stress • Take Advantage of school resources, such as Counseling, Academic Advising, Tutoring, or your professor’s office hours. • Grab Your Goals and Reward Accordingly • $tre$$ Management • Study What You Enjoy: Choose 1 Class To Provide An Outlet • The Work-School Balance
  15. 15. Tips on Dealing With School Stress • Take Advantage of school resources, such as Counseling, Academic Advising, Tutoring, or your professor’s office hours. • Grab Your Goals and Reward Accordingly • $tre$$ Management • Study What You Enjoy: Choose 1 Class To Provide An Outlet • The Work-School Balance
  16. 16. What you consume may be stressing you
  17. 17. What you consume may be stressing you ❖ Caffeine, sugar, alcohol and chocolate are “food stressors” that make stress worse on the body. Salt contributes to fatigue through dehydration, and high-fat meals raise stress hormone levels and keep them high.
  18. 18. What you consume may be stressing you ❖ Caffeine, sugar, alcohol and chocolate are “food stressors” that make stress worse on the body. Salt contributes to fatigue through dehydration, and high-fat meals raise stress hormone levels and keep them high. ❖ “Food supporters” include fish and its oils, fruits, vegetables, water, complex carbohydrates, protein and B-vitamins.
  19. 19. What you consume may be stressing you ❖ Caffeine, sugar, alcohol and chocolate are “food stressors” that make stress worse on the body. Salt contributes to fatigue through dehydration, and high-fat meals raise stress hormone levels and keep them high. ❖ “Food supporters” include fish and its oils, fruits, vegetables, water, complex carbohydrates, protein and B-vitamins. ❖ Don’t smoke: People who smoke are likely to be more depressed than non-smokers.
  20. 20. What you consume may be stressing you ❖ Caffeine, sugar, alcohol and chocolate are “food stressors” that make stress worse on the body. Salt contributes to fatigue through dehydration, and high-fat meals raise stress hormone levels and keep them high. ❖ “Food supporters” include fish and its oils, fruits, vegetables, water, complex carbohydrates, protein and B-vitamins. ❖ Don’t smoke: People who smoke are likely to be more depressed than non-smokers. ❖ Exercise! Certain endorphins and other brain chemicals released in response to exercise also produce a natural “high” and reduce stress, pain and depression.
  21. 21. AMERICAN MALE ICONS
  22. 22. Internalized messages are given to us at an early age. We then create certain ideas about what it means to be a man based on them. Messages can be social, cultural, religious, parental or even self- created. How can you become aware of the messages that propel your thinking about being a man? Are they healthy or unhealthy messages, and do they work for you?
  23. 23. Messages (and Myths) About Being a Man • Not “being a man” by asking for help • “I’m weak if I have to ask for help.” • Reducing your “image” to friends, family • “Strong, silent type” of man (Tony Soprano) • The OWC Philosophy (“Only Women Cry”) • “I can handle it myself/I’m in control of it.”
  24. 24. What Works? • Living lined up with your values • Positive relationships and effective communication • Healthy living • Practicing stress management and good self-care techniques • Creating school balance for yourself • Asking for help when its needed • Staying true to yourself, your wants, needs, and desires
  25. 25. And What Doesn’t Work? • Bad relationships: friendships, family and romantic • Poor communication with others • Eating an unhealthy diet and bad lifestyle choices; poor sleep patterns • Not asking for help when you need it most • Not listening to yourself and doing what’s best for you • Believing cultural messages and myths about “being a man” that prevent you from seeking help
  26. 26. Good luck during your final exams! Thank you for coming today.

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