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How to keep your cool…<br />Importance of proper communication<br />Dr. BabanDolas, M.S.<br />Nityaseva Hospital & Global Vision Eye Bank, Pune.<br />

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Words are windowsor They are wall…choice is yours…<br />

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Principles of Effective Communication <br />

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2 most important ingredients of communication <br />‘I’ ‘YOU’<br />

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Effective communication is a process of <br />Creating bridge between ‘I’ and ‘You”<br />Creating understanding<br />Creating connection<br />Creating a safe space to express oneself and receive others<br />Creating a WIN-WIN relationship.<br />

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Communication is about creating a WIN-WIN relationship<br />

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We all want WIN-WIN relationship. Then WHY…<br />We have conflicts<br />We feel upset<br />We feel annoyed<br />We feel angry.<br />We feel disconnected with each other<br />

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Obstacles to Effective Communication<br />Judgments<br />Right / Wrong / Good / Bad<br />Blame and Fault<br />Opinions<br />Evaluation<br />Criticism <br />Labels<br />Demand and Threat <br />

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DO NOT JUDGE,<br />AND YOU WILL NOT BE JUDGED.<br />FOR AS YOU JUDGE OTHERS, <br />SO YOU WILL YOURSELVES BE JUDGED….<br />HOLY BIBLE, MATTHEW 7:1<br />

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Judging, blaming and criticizing are HABITS<br />

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Moving beyond these HABITS<br />

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Beyond ‘Right’ and ‘Wrong’ there is a field I will meet you there… -Rumi<br />

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What happens to disconnect us from<br /> our compassionate nature, leading us <br /> to behave violently and exploitatively?<br />And Conversely,<br />What allows some people to stay <br />Connected to their compassionate<br /> nature under even the most trying<br /> circumstances? <br />

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4 Principles of Effective Communication<br />

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Principle one- OBSERVATION<br />Observing without judging is the highest form of human intelligence.<br />-J Kirshnamurthy<br />Indian Philosopher<br />OBSERVATION’s are:<br />Facts<br />What you see<br />What you hear<br />Expressing and receiving without judging and blaming.<br />

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Principle two- Feelings<br />Connecting with the feeling of self and others. <br />Feelings are emotions<br />Bodily sensations<br />Example:<br />Angry, upset, lonely, low, guilty, fearful, sad<br />Happy, excited, joy, satisfied, inspired<br />

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Principle three- Needs<br />Connecting with the universal needs.<br />Example;<br />Respect, support, care, understanding, to be heard, truth, help, confidence, gentleness, <br />Harmony, togetherness, unity.<br />Our feeling arise due to our met or unmet needs.<br />

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Principle four- Request<br />In order to fulfill your unmet needs we make a request.<br />Request is an action which will fulfill your need. <br />One concrete step which will help you move your relationship forward.<br />

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Fortunate is the oneWho has learned to admire,But not to envy..<br />

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Never miss the opportunity to compliment or say something<br /> encouraging to someone<br />

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Refuse to talk negatively about others; don't gossip <br />and<br />don't listen to gossip<br />

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Have a forgiving view of people. <br />Believe that most people<br />are doing the best they can<br />

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Keep an open mind; <br />discuss, <br />but don't argue. <br />(It is possible to disagree without being disagreeable.)<br />

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If someone criticizes you, <br />see if there is any TRUTH <br />to what he is saying; <br />if so, make changes. <br />If there is no truth to the criticism, <br />ignore it and live so that no one will<br /> believe the negative remark<br />

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Cultivate your sense of humor; <br />laughter is the shortest distance <br />between two people. <br />Do not seek so much to be consoled, as to console; <br />do not seek so much to be understood, as to understand; <br />do not seek so much to be loved as to love<br />

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“ What I want in my Life<br /> is compassion,<br /> a flow between myself and others<br /> based on a mutual giving from the Heart.”<br /> - MBR<br />

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Tolerance empowers us to not <br />let irritating circumstances steal <br />our peace of mind. <br />Lack of tolerance makes us a victim <br />of our circumstances – <br />VERY difficult to practice........<br />but practice makes "it" perfect !!<br /> <br />

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“KINDNESS IS A LANGUAGE,<br /> WE ALL UNDERSTAND…<br /> EVEN THE BLIND CAN SEE<br /> AND DEAF CAN HEAR.”<br />

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From today Let’s follow DIVINE DIET…..<br />“Zero on Bitterness, Add on Patience, Less on Worry, More on Hope , Slow on Anger & Fast on Forgiveness.”<br />

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THANKS……<br />ANIRUDDHA….A certified NVC trainer<br />Who taught me NVC & helped me to make this presentation<br />References:<br />Nonviolent Communication, A Language of Compassion<br /> Marshal B. Rosenberg, Ph.D.<br />For further details: www.cnvc.org<br />www.invci.org<br /> www.nvcindia.org<br />