May 2011 - Pat Driediger, CA

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All FIred Up - Chartered Mediator

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  • (Susskind,Field, 1996)
  • May 2011 - Pat Driediger, CA

    1. 1. All Fired Up<br />Anger is the second emotion<br />
    2. 2. Agenda<br />Case Scenario<br />Definition of anger<br />Expressions of anger<br />Anger Cycle<br />Purpose of anger<br />Benefits of anger<br />Using anger constructively<br />Responding to anger in others<br />Q & A<br />
    3. 3. Fictitious Case Scenario<br />Les (former -employee)<br />Rick (Sr. Mgr. Acme Tech. Ltd) <br /> Pat (mediator)<br />Erin (Jr. Mgr. Acme Tech Ltd Not present)<br />
    4. 4. Definition of Anger<br />An agitated and often hostile state of arousal, varying in intensity, that is emotional, physiological, and cognitive in nature, originating from a perceived threat or sense of wrongdoing.<br />
    5. 5. Expressions of anger<br />Direct: annoyed, irritated, fed up, exasperated<br />Indirect: disappointed, guilty, depressed, hopeless<br />Repressed: sarcasm, passive aggressive behaviour, “forgetting”, physical symptoms or accidents<br />
    6. 6. Anger Cycle<br />Crisis Phase <br />Escalation Phase<br />Recovery Phase<br />Post Crisis Phase<br />Event-Trigger <br />Judgement/Intelligence<br /> Creativity<br />
    7. 7. What is the purpose of anger?<br />Anger acts as a secondary emotion, emerging in response to the stress of another emotional state that is experienced as more uncomfortable than anger.<br />(Susskind,Field, 1996)<br />
    8. 8. Painful emotions<br />Loss <br />Grief<br />Shame<br />Hurt<br />Anxiety<br />Unworthiness <br />Unmet needs or desires<br />
    9. 9. Using Anger Constructively<br />A strong signal that gets our attention.<br />Motivation to act, make changes and confront anxiety producing situations that we might otherwise avoid.<br />Energy to continue pursuing problems and provocations until they are resolved. <br />
    10. 10. Benefits of Anger<br />The body recovers faster from the stress hormones released from anger than it does to those released from fear.<br />Anger increases feelings of certainty and control. Fear enhances feeling of uncertainty and loss of control.<br />
    11. 11. So, does anyone else feel their needs aren’t being met?<br />
    12. 12. Responding to anger in others<br />Respond with empathy and acknowledgment.<br />Don’t try to “reason” a person into calming down.<br />Allow the other person the right to their own feelings of anger.<br />Put a ? between you and the angry person. Stay curious.<br />
    13. 13.
    14. 14. www.joyofconflict.com<br />2010<br />Staying curious <br />
    15. 15. Refuse the Bait<br />
    16. 16. Summary<br />Expressions of anger<br />Anger arousal cycle<br />Purpose of anger (anger is the 2nd emotion)<br />Benefits of anger<br />Using anger constructively<br />Responding to anger in others<br />
    17. 17. Thank you!<br />

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