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Should You Tell Someone You Forgive Them?


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That depends on the situation!
We hear it frequently in client interviews. They share how someone has abused or mistreated them in the past, and they now want to visit the offender to tell them that they have forgiven them.
Is that a good thing to do? Is it helpful? For whom?

Published in: Spiritual
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Should You Tell Someone You Forgive Them?

  1. 1. https://AandBCounseling.com
  2. 2. Clients share how they call/visit an offender on their own
  3. 3. They tell the person they have forgiven them
  4. 4. Is that a good thing to do? Is it helpful? For whom?
  5. 5. Forgiveness is an important element of preparing for deliverance
  6. 6. It is also a core part of Jesus' teachings
  7. 7. We teach that forgiveness is a decision and not based on emotions
  8. 8. We are commanded to do it (Matt 18:21-22)
  9. 9. But, must we do that face to face?
  10. 10. The answer is an emphatic "No!"
  11. 11. Clarification: we are speaking about unilateral, unexpected encounters
  12. 12. When reconcilation is underway between two people, this is very appropriate and necessary.
  13. 13. The one who has been wronged will benefit and help the process by declaring they have forgiven
  14. 14. It is a verbal olive branch to say "I forgive you"
  15. 15. But for self-initiated actions, we recommend against it unless safeguards are in place
  16. 16. Done with the wrong motives, it can go badly
  17. 17. If God directs it, He has a divine plan
  18. 18. Forgiveness is a one-way release of the offender to God
  19. 19. It does not need to be done face-to-face (or over social media)
  20. 20. What's the best approach if you want to extend forgiveness?
  21. 21. Begin by asking for forgiveness for YOUR sins against that person
  22. 22. Be specific in your declaration
  23. 23. Ask for forgiveness and then be quiet
  24. 24. If it goes well (remorse from the other party) then you can consider saying that you too forgive them
  25. 25. If the other party reacts negatively, take a graceful exit
  26. 26. No parting verbal shots
  27. 27. You have done it the right way before the Lord
  28. 28. Now it is time to wait for good fruit from good seed He has planted
  29. 29. Forgiveness is a tricky endeavor
  30. 30. It is necessary for healthy spiritual growth
  31. 31. Because of that, the demonic realm labors to derail it
  32. 32. Forgive others, ask for forgiveness as the Lord leads.
  33. 33. Be wise about telling others you have forgiven them
  34. 34. Worldwide Christian Counseling and Deliverance Ministry Services Christian Counseling Degrees Deliverance Ministry Training