Part 2 Learning Confidence andResponsibility within the Familiy
The Family-Home - Reflecting God‘s character - Guidance with God’s loving discipline Psalm 32:9 loving discipline 2 Samuel 17:14-15 Learning confidence God’s and responsibility guidance Example Psalm 32:8 and instruction Teaching Rules Encouragement Rewards God’s 1 John 4:8unconditional love A strong foundation of love and healthy Romans 5:5+8 relationships
ACT to fill the emotional tank • Attention • Creativity • Time
Group discussion Which values are important for your children? - What should they learn at home? - How do you want to influence your children? - What do you want to pass on to them?
Important educational goals• Honesty • Good self esteem• Reliability • Self control• Tidiness • Obedience• Money management • Sexual purity• Ability to sustain good relationships• Ability to accept correction• Ability to solve conflicts• Ability to make good decisions• Respect of property• Respect for people
The supreme goal for our child-rearing Guidance to an ever-increasing self-reliance and self-responsibility. This means that children develop their own values and are able to independently and responsibly make good decisions before God.
Teach them diligently...“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.“ Deuteronomy 6:5-7, NAS
Teach them diligently Deuteronomy 6:5-7• Parents bear the main responsibility.• Biblical teaching is a commandment of God.• It is an active training and learning in the Laws of God.• No strict drilling.• Parents have to live it - be an example.
Train your child . . .“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NIV“Train” (hanak) has the meaning of: educate, guide, train.“In the way he should go” means: according to his inclination or character.
Train your child . . . “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NIVA more precise translation: “Train a child according to his inclinations / characteristics and he will not turn away from the direction even when he grows older.”
Every child is unique“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalm 139:13-14
Green, Yellow or Red ?The particular abilities and limitations of a child canbe compared to the three colors of a traffic light.The green lightsymbolizes the ability of a child. In this areahe is motivated, has success, and is happy.The yellow and red lightsstand for his limited talents.In the yellow area he can keep up, but is only average.Red areas are where he has neither success nor enjoyment.
Learning from God, the Father• He is our example “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.” Eph 5:1• The Bible is full of encouragement “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased!” Luke 3:22• What about rewards in the Bible? “The law of the Lord is perfect…, in keeping them there is great reward.” Psalm 19:7+11• In God‘s Kingdom there are „Family rules - think of the 10 commandments or the Sermon on the Mount
Rewards make learning more enjoyable • Do not overvalue rewards and do not use them for too long. • Use them, if a child is fighting with himself and needs encouragement in learning a new behaviour. • Choose rewards according to your child’s interests, even let him choose one, but: – Do not give big rewards for small tasks. – Avoid using money. – Do not give rewards for the daily tasks.
Guiding a child Encouragement Encouragement EncouragementCriticism Encouragement 1C= 4E