Successfully reported this slideshow.
We use your LinkedIn profile and activity data to personalize ads and to show you more relevant ads. You can change your ad preferences anytime.

Princess Leia and Open Source: A story of understanding and coping with Impostor Syndrome

116 views

Published on

This talk was born, quite surprisingly, out of listening to Carrie Fisher talk about her struggle with addiction. What really resonated with me was when she talked about how she coped with her struggles by talking about them with others.

“It creates community when you talk about private things and you can find other people that have the same things. Otherwise, I don’t know - I felt very lonely with some of the issues that I had or history that I had. And when I shared about it, I found that others had it, too.” – Carrie Fisher on Fresh Air with Terry Gross, 28 November 2016

At that moment, I decided I had to talk about my struggle with Impostor Syndrome. As I reflect on my life, I’ve identified Impostor Syndrome as a central theme. Over the years I’ve been terrified to raise my hand in class, speak up in meetings, file bug reports, and — especially — contribute to open source projects. I was constantly afraid that I’d be seen as a tragically uninformed dolt not worthy of the position I’ve been put in. So, most often, I kept quiet.

Until recently, I had no idea what this feeling was and where it came from. I didn’t have a word for it until reading an article where Luke Kanies described these feelings and provided me with a name for it: Impostor Syndrome. Once I had a word for what I was feeling, I was finally able to understand it. I was able to identify ways to cope with it and learn about it and how other people handled it. This is my story of Impostor Syndrome and how I’ve coped with it and come to understand it as one of my biggest strengths; hopefully, it’ll help others do the same.

Published in: Software
  • Be the first to comment

Princess Leia and Open Source: A story of understanding and coping with Impostor Syndrome

  1. 1. PRINCESS LEIA AND OPEN SOURCE A story of understanding and coping with Impostor Syndrome David Danzilio
  2. 2. ABOUT ME > Bostonian > Cloud and Platform Automation Manager at Kovarus > Previously at Constant Contact, Sandia National Laboratories, and a few other places you've never heard of > Open source contributor to a number of projects, mostly in the Puppet ecosystem
  3. 3. It creates community when you talk about private things...I felt very lonely with some of the issues that I had or history that I had. And when I shared about it, I found that others had it, too. Carrie Fisher © Riccardo Ghilardi
  4. 4. IMPOSTOR SYNDROME
  5. 5. Dr. Pauline Rose Clance first described the impostor phenomenon in the journal Psychotherapy in 1978
  6. 6. Clance focused her research on high achieving women at a time when women made up a much smaller percentage of the workforce
  7. 7. Further studies have shown that men and women experience the impostor phenomenon at the same rate
  8. 8. FEELING LIKE AN IMPOSTOR
  9. 9. UNQUALIFIED
  10. 10. I'm not good enough to be on the faculty here. Some mistake was made in the selection process. - A Professor interviewed by Dr. Clance
  11. 11. Obviously I'm in this position because my abilities have been overestimated. - A University Department Chairperson interviewed by Dr. Clance
  12. 12. HIDING SOMETHING
  13. 13. I was convinced that I would be discovered as a phony when I took my comprehensive doctoral examination. I thought the final test had come. In one way, I was somewhat relieved at this prospect because the pretense would finally be over. I was shocked when my chairman told me that my answers were excellent and that my paper was one of the best he had seen in his entire career. - A Doctoral Student interviewed by Dr. Clance
  14. 14. Although my grades were fine, and I was there on a scholarship, I was sure that my colleagues, professors, department and University would find out that they had made a mistake; that they shouldn’t have admitted me to grad school; that they shouldn’t have given me a scholarship. - Susan Weinschenk, Ph.D
  15. 15. AFRAID TO SPEAK UP
  16. 16. It’s just been convincing myself that I’m worthy enough to be able to tell these stories, you know? - Issa Rae, Creator of HBO's Insecure
  17. 17. THE IMPOSTOR CYCLE
  18. 18. WHO ARE THE IMPOSTORS?
  19. 19. INTROVERTS
  20. 20. HIGH PERFORMERS
  21. 21. KNOWLEDGE WORKERS
  22. 22. MINORITIES
  23. 23. ARE YOU AN IMPOSTOR?
  24. 24. PROBABLY NOT
  25. 25. I DEFINITELY AM THOUGH
  26. 26. COPING WITH IMPOSTOR SYNDROME
  27. 27. IMPOSTOR SYNDROME IS A COGNITIVE BIAS
  28. 28. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
  29. 29. YOU'RE NOT ALONE
  30. 30. TALK ABOUT IT
  31. 31. EMBRACE IMPOSTOR SYNDROME
  32. 32. EMBRACE BEING A NOVICE
  33. 33. WATCH FOR BURN OUT
  34. 34. MY STRUGGLE WITH IMPOSTOR SYNDROME
  35. 35. MY SYSADMIN DAYS
  36. 36. BECOMING A SOFTWARE DEVELOPER
  37. 37. HEARING THE TERM IMPOSTOR SYNDROME
  38. 38. WHAT'S THIS GOT TO DO WITH OPEN SOURCE?
  39. 39. CONTRIBUTING TO OPEN SOURCE FORCED MEOUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE
  40. 40. DAVID THE PERFECTIONIST
  41. 41. I JOINED A SUPPORTIVE OPEN SOURCE COMMUNITY
  42. 42. SHARING MY EXPERIENCE
  43. 43. THE STRUGGLE CONTINUES
  44. 44. THANK YOU!FIND ME ON: > Twitter @djdanzilio > GitHub danzilio > ddanzilio (at) kovarus (dot) com > blog.danzil.io
  45. 45. RECOMMENDED READINGTHE IMPOSTOR PHENOMENON IN HIGH ACHIEVING WOMEN, CLANCE AND IMES, PSYCHOTHERAPY, VOL. 15 NO. 3, 1978 THE IMPOSTOR PHENOMENON, SAKULUKU AND ALEXANDER, INTERNATIONAL JOURNAL OF BEHAVIORAL SCIENCE, VOL. 6 NO. 1, 2011 THE IMPOSTOR PHENOMENON: RECENT RESEARCH FINDINGS REGARDING DYNAMICS, PERSONALITY AND FAMILY PATTERNS AND THEIR IMPLICATIONS FOR TREATMENT, LANGFORD AND CLANCE, PSYCHOTHERAPY, VOL. 30 NO. 3, 1999 THE IMPOSTOR PHENOMENON: AN INTERNAL BARRIER TO EMPOWERMENT AND ACHIEVEMENT, CLANCE AND O'TOOLE, WOMEN & THERAPY, VOL. 6 NO. 3, 1987

×