How to Have a Happy Start in Motherhood


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The number one secret that all first time moms-to-be should know for a happy start in motherhood

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How to Have a Happy Start in Motherhood

  1. 1. How to Have a HappyStart in Motherhood
 for First Time Moms-to-be
 by Coach Ahu

  2. 2. • The first few months in motherhood are the mostdemanding ones.• Trying to manage daily life while recovering fromchildbirth and meeting the needs of a newborn is noteasy.• Most new mothers get disappointed because life afterthe birth of their baby is usually very different from howthey dreamed about it while they were pregnant. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  3. 3. The good news is this won’t happen to you ifyou remember that the number one secret tohaving a great start in motherhood is beingprepared, not only physically but alsomentally and emotionally, for your new lifeafter the birth of your baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  4. 4. When you know what to expect, you canplan how you’ll effectively manage thingsand you’ll enjoy these most special firstfew months with your baby to the full. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  5. 5. • There are 20 crucial topics you need tobe aware of when you are preparing to be afirst time mother.• Working on each, slowly and steadily, willbring you closer and closer to a great startin motherhood. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  6. 6. 1 – Fresh Start• Raising a child, by its demanding nature, will bring outthe best and worst in you. If you have any past orcurrent unresolved issues that are preventing you fromhaving inner peace and contentment, this can impacthow you parent your child.• Use your pregnancy to motivate yourself to work oneliminating any negativity from your life, so you canprepare for a fresh start with your baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  7. 7. 2 – Self-confidence• In the many ups and downs of your motherhoodjourney, one thing that will help you to keep it togetherand make the best possible decisions, is self-confidence.• Being a confident person starts with knowing who youare by being very clear on your personal values,strengths, and natural abilities, and by embracing pastand current achievements.• Working on building up your self-confidence while youare expecting, will serve you very well as a new mother. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  8. 8. 3 – Peaceful Life• If you are used to feeling in control and organized, youmight be frustrated when your orderly lifestyle flies outthe window after you give birth.• Even though a certain degree of chaos is inevitable,there are many things you can do to minimize it such as:simplifying your life before the birth of your baby; saying“no” to obligations and occasions that are not a priority;and learning to stop pressuring yourself with perfectionby making your peace with being good enough. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  9. 9. 4 – Support System• After you have your baby, the most difficult thing for youto find will be time. Time for sleeping, resting, eating,personal care, hobbies, romance, running errands,housework, socializing, and so on.• Feeling that you never have enough time can lead toyou resenting motherhood, rather than enjoying it.• Work out who you can rely on to give you support inyour first few months with your baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  10. 10. 5 – Planning Your Finances• A tiny new baby can mean big changes and majorexpenses for new parents, so it’s best to be preparedfinancially.• Start thinking about this early on in your pregnancy,because it will have an impact on whether you will needto work or not, and on how much you can allocate for asolid support system, as well as for the other expensesfor baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  11. 11. 6 – Returning to Work After Baby• If you are planning to return to work after your baby isborn, there are a few things you can do to have asmoother transition, such as finding out about yourmaternity-leave benefits and clarifying with your employeryour options of working flexible hours, telecommuting orworking part time.• If you are self-employed, you will benefit from working ona plan that will accommodate your new life in the first fewmonths with your baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  12. 12. 7 – Relationship After Baby• Having a baby is a life-changing event, and yourrelationship with your partner may change after the birth,due to lifestyle adjustments, role changes, and theresponsibility of baby care.• It’ll be a huge help to figure out in advance how to dividework, childcare, and household duties and how tobalance having time with the baby, time as a couple, andtime alone. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  13. 13. 8 – Emotional Support• New mothers usually feel mixed emotions as they adjustto a new lifestyle, due to hormonal changes, sleepdeprivation, and just being overwhelmed.• The most effective way to manage any mood swings isto make sure you have people in your life who will beavailable for emotional support, especially for the first fewmonths of motherhood. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  14. 14. 9 – “Me Time” for Mommy• When you are a new mother, it’s so easy to get caughtup in the never-ending demands of baby care … but you’llbe better able to meet those demands if you consciouslyplan for your “Me Time” and make it a priority.• Balancing your own needs with motherhood will be themost important new skill you develop. Making time to takegood care of yourself is your biggest gift to yourself, yourbaby, and your partner. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  15. 15. 10 – Embracing Your New Body• Pregnancy is the biggest change in a woman’s body sincepuberty, and many women do not anticipate how having achild will affect their bodies. They are surprised to find thattheir body does not immediately go back its pre-pregnancyshape (as seems to happen with celebrity new mothers)and they end up being disappointed.• Prepare yourself emotionally by having realisticexpectations of how your body will be after birth and keepreminding yourself all the ways in which it supports you inyour life. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  16. 16. 11 – Combining Instincts with Parenting Skills • Motherhood, while viewed as instinctive by society, does not come naturally much of the time. • You may face feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt as you figure out by trial and error how to take care of your baby—and as you begin to realize that your instincts don’t have all the answers. • If that happens to you, don’t panic. Just know that mothering is mostly a learned skill and not only instinctive. Effective parenting comes from using instincts together with learned parenting skills. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  17. 17. 12 – Basic Baby Care• There are many new skills to learn when taking care of a newborn:breast-feeding, bottle feeding, burping, changing diapers,swaddling, bathing, dressing, and holding the baby.• Many parents-to-be wait to learn these skills until after the birth oftheir baby, but trying to adjust to so much at once creates stress,especially when you are tired and sleep-deprived.• Educate yourself about these tasks as soon as possible duringyour pregnancy by taking courses, reading books, or practicing withdolls.• This will make you feel prepared, give you relief and confidenceonce your baby is born, and help you to get on with things smoothly. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  18. 18. 13 – Creating a Routine• One thing that most parenting and child-development specialistsagree on is that babies thrive best on a routine.• There are many different schools of thoughts on how to achieve agreat routine and it can get very confusing when you’re decidingwhich path to follow. All options have advantages anddisadvantages, and different methods work for different parents andbabies.• Start your research ahead of time, about different school ofthoughts and different routine styles. Talk to other parents, findingout about as many diverse experiences as possible. Then agreewith your partner on a way that feels right to both of you. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  19. 19. 14 – Efficient & Happy Feeding Time• The media presents breast-feeding as natural, easy, andinstinctive. In real life, many new mothers struggle with sorenipples, not having enough milk or having too much milk,because they are not properly taught how to feed theirbaby.• It’s important that you educate yourself ahead of timeabout what it takes to feed your baby efficiently andeffectively so that she will grow and sleep better, and soyou will look forward these happy feeding times. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  20. 20. 15 – Good Sleeping Habits for Baby• One of the biggest challenges of caring for a newborn isthe change in your sleep patterns. Parents are human too,and they need sleep in order to function. Not gettingenough sleep day after day will cause accumulated sleepdeprivation, impacting on your relationship with yourpartner and on your enjoyment of motherhood.• Having quality sleep is as important for you as it isimportant for your baby’s growth. Therefore, it’s essentialthat you educate yourself on how you can help your babydevelop good sleeping habits right from the beginning. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  21. 21. 16 – Minimizing Baby’s Crying• Your baby will cry and you won’t like it. You can educateyourself in advance about the reasons why babies cry,other than being hungry (such as over-tiredness, tummypain, boredom, not feeling well). Learn how you caneliminate the reasons for crying, and soothe your babywhen everything else fails.• Being informed will help you to remain calm and centeredwhen your baby cries, making you better able to figure outwhat’s going on with your baby and soothe her. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  22. 22. 17 – Bonding with Your Baby• Not all mothers bond with their babies instantly. Somemothers feel an immediate connection with their newborn,but for others, the bond takes longer to develop.• Don’t worry or feel guilty if you aren’t overwhelmed with arush of love at the beginning. Bonding is a naturalbyproduct of everyday care-giving.• Do your research on what it takes to create a strong bondbetween mother and baby. Be informed about why thatbond could be disrupted and what to do to prevent that. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  23. 23. 18 – Daddy Bonding with Baby• For some first time fathers or fathers-to-be, it takes time tobond with the baby.• They will need opportunities to spend some private timewith baby and they will need your encouragement andpositive feedback to build up their confidence.• Discuss some ideas with your partner and create a plantogether of how he can be included in the daily care of thebaby, so that he does not feel left out. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  24. 24. 19 – Dealing with Advice• When you’re expecting your first baby, suddenly everyoneis an expert! One of the biggest challenges facing newmothers is the nonstop advice from parents, relatives,friends, and even strangers.• It is easy to get overwhelmed by these intrusions and reactin a way that could harm your relationships.• Plan ahead of time how to handle these situationsgracefully if you disagree with the advice of people who areespecially close to you (such as your mother, mother-in-law, grandmother, or your best friend). © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  25. 25. 20 – First Week with Baby at Home• Before your baby’s birth, prepare for making that specialfirst week calm, peaceful, and fun for you, your partner, andyour precious little one.• Consider: cleaning the house so you don’t have to worryabout it later on, planning what to eat in the first week,organizing who will help you with which tasks, making sureyou have the essential necessities for you and your baby. © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -
  26. 26. Don’t leave those preparations to the last minute, as younever know when your baby will decide to come out.I go into more depth on each topic in the Free MotherhoodGame Plan Guide that you can download for free blog.Looking forward to seeing you thereCoach Ahu © 2012 Copyright - Coach Ahu - -