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WORKING WITH YOUR
CHILDREN SO THEY CAN BE
THEIR BEST
Address: 80-84 New South Head Rd, EDGECLFF, Sydney, NSW 2027
Phone: (...
Working With Your Children So
They Can Be Their Best
• IM
• Self determination theory
• Collaborative Problem Solving
2www...
I Just Want My Child to be Happy
3www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Happiness is a Side Effect of
Other Factors
• Skills/competence
• Internal motivation/autonomy
• Connection to others
• Me...
What Are You Hoping For?
• Obedience
• Compliance
5www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
• Responsibility
• Caring
• Competence and
...
Aim for IM
Internal motivation: your child does
something because he is inner
directed and not to avoid
punishment.
6www.a...
Law of the Harvest
7www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Self Motivation and Healthy
Psychological Development are
Natural Processes
8www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Self Determination Theory
9www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Self Determination Theory
Relatedness, Competence and
Autonomy are three innate
psychological needs. When met, they
lead t...
Self Determination Theory
11www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Relatedness to Others
• Deep, meaningful, attachment to
others starting at birth.
12www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
NOT THIS
13www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Celebrate Your Child’s Life
14www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Communicate Often, Face to Face
• Dinner table discussion
• Face to face
• Share feelings
• Remember details
15www.anxiety...
Self Determination Theory
16www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Competence or Mastery is
Achieved When a Child is Given
Success Experiences
17www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Behavioural Guidance
18www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Completing a Project
19www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Self Determination Theory
20www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Self Determination Continuum
21www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Autonomy Means the Childs
Opinion is Valued
22www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
CPS: Collaborative Problem
Solving
• Allow your child to be part of the
solution.
• Ask questions.
• Think things through ...
The formulation of a problem is often
more essential than its solution.
- Albert Einstein
24www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Kids Do Well If They Can
Doing well is always preferable to
not doing well (if a kid has the skills
to do well in the firs...
Kids Do Well If They Can
This, of course, is a dramatic departure
from the view of challenging kids as
attention-seeking, ...
Kids Do Well If They Can
The single most important thing a
care-giver can do to help a
behaviourally challenging child is ...
Problem Solving Plan
2828
These ARE Different Lenses!
29www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Identifying Problems and
Solutions Without Words
30www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Identifying Problems and
Solutions Without Words
31www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Good parenting means being
responsive to the hand you’ve been
dealt.
- Dr Ross W Greene
32www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
Questions & Answers
33www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
• Ask Renee any questions you may have
• Alternatively you can email the...
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Working With Your Children So They Can Be Their Best

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This powerpoint was used in a recent presentation to parents at a school by Clinical Psychologist Renee Mill. This topic was requested as parents today want to equip their children to cope better with school and other pressures.

Published in: Self Improvement
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Working With Your Children So They Can Be Their Best

  1. 1. WORKING WITH YOUR CHILDREN SO THEY CAN BE THEIR BEST Address: 80-84 New South Head Rd, EDGECLFF, Sydney, NSW 2027 Phone: (+612) 9328-5899 Fax: (+612) 9328 1393 Web: www.anxietysolutionscbt.com Email: info@anxietysolutionscbt.com
  2. 2. Working With Your Children So They Can Be Their Best • IM • Self determination theory • Collaborative Problem Solving 2www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  3. 3. I Just Want My Child to be Happy 3www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  4. 4. Happiness is a Side Effect of Other Factors • Skills/competence • Internal motivation/autonomy • Connection to others • Meaning 4www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  5. 5. What Are You Hoping For? • Obedience • Compliance 5www.anxietysolutionscbt.com • Responsibility • Caring • Competence and • Moral behaviour
  6. 6. Aim for IM Internal motivation: your child does something because he is inner directed and not to avoid punishment. 6www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  7. 7. Law of the Harvest 7www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  8. 8. Self Motivation and Healthy Psychological Development are Natural Processes 8www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  9. 9. Self Determination Theory 9www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  10. 10. Self Determination Theory Relatedness, Competence and Autonomy are three innate psychological needs. When met, they lead to enhanced self-motivation and mental health. 10www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  11. 11. Self Determination Theory 11www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  12. 12. Relatedness to Others • Deep, meaningful, attachment to others starting at birth. 12www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  13. 13. NOT THIS 13www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  14. 14. Celebrate Your Child’s Life 14www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  15. 15. Communicate Often, Face to Face • Dinner table discussion • Face to face • Share feelings • Remember details 15www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  16. 16. Self Determination Theory 16www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  17. 17. Competence or Mastery is Achieved When a Child is Given Success Experiences 17www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  18. 18. Behavioural Guidance 18www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  19. 19. Completing a Project 19www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  20. 20. Self Determination Theory 20www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  21. 21. Self Determination Continuum 21www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  22. 22. Autonomy Means the Childs Opinion is Valued 22www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  23. 23. CPS: Collaborative Problem Solving • Allow your child to be part of the solution. • Ask questions. • Think things through together. 23www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  24. 24. The formulation of a problem is often more essential than its solution. - Albert Einstein 24www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  25. 25. Kids Do Well If They Can Doing well is always preferable to not doing well (if a kid has the skills to do well in the first place). 25www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  26. 26. Kids Do Well If They Can This, of course, is a dramatic departure from the view of challenging kids as attention-seeking, manipulative, coercive, limit-testing, and poorly motivated. 26www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  27. 27. Kids Do Well If They Can The single most important thing a care-giver can do to help a behaviourally challenging child is to be the person who, at long last, identifies the lagging skills and unsolved problems that have been contributing to challenging episodes. - Dr Ross W Greene 27www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  28. 28. Problem Solving Plan 2828
  29. 29. These ARE Different Lenses! 29www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  30. 30. Identifying Problems and Solutions Without Words 30www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  31. 31. Identifying Problems and Solutions Without Words 31www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  32. 32. Good parenting means being responsive to the hand you’ve been dealt. - Dr Ross W Greene 32www.anxietysolutionscbt.com
  33. 33. Questions & Answers 33www.anxietysolutionscbt.com • Ask Renee any questions you may have • Alternatively you can email them to renee@anxietysolutionscbt.com. • For ongoing updates, please make sure you’ve provided us with your email address.

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