You have been in deep grief and depression;you are going through many trials, you say thatyou are losing hope, and you admit that you reclose to losing your Iman also. What you believeis that your trials are the most severe from all,and none is suﬀering like you. But is this true?
I will reveal to you three secrets which not many have discovered; and those who do know these secrets are the ones that truly suﬀered in life, but they gained Wisdom from Allah (the Exalted) in return for their patience; and now you see them practicing the knowledge they gained with true and sincere Iman/Faith in Allah. I pray to Allah, that hebless us with the best of Wisdom and Iman, and may Allah make us one of those who are most patient.
First secret: is that, there is always someone suﬀering much more than you,going through much bigger trials than you; and that person s pain is much more severe than yours. “Look at those who stand at alower level than you but don’t lookat those who stand at a higher level than you, for this would make the favours (bestowed upon you by Allah) insigniﬁcant (in your eyes)." [Sahih Muslim, Book 42, Number 7070]
What is meant with this is that whenever you are sad because of someone having better looks thanyou, being wealthier, or healthier, you should ratherlook at those who are given less such favours than you, because this is the way that will grant you abetter understanding of your situation and you will appreciate Allah s favours more. Greed comes out of envy, and they are both very dangerous selﬁshdesires that will destroy you completely if you give up into them; therefore do not wish to be better than someone except in two cases:
First: A man whom Allah has given wealth and he spends it righteously. And second: A man whom Allah has given wisdom/knowledge (of the Qur an and Sunnah), and he acts according to it and teaches it to others. [Bukhari: Volume 9 Book 89 #255] This does not mean to envy, but to wish to be great as these two types of people.
Second secret: is that, whatever is meant for you will come to occur, but whatever is not then it will never occur. “The best of faith ispatience and magnanimity.” [Ahmad, Sahih]
You must accept Allah s decree, whatever it is; butif you don t, then prepare yourself for depression,anxiety, and sickness. You will never have peace in mind unless you accept whatever Allah has destined for you that happened in the past and whatever to happen in the future. Know that the more you accept Allah s Will, the more peace He will send in your heart. If you accept the trial that Allah sent you, whileknowing that it is a test for your patience; then youshould struggle to be one of the best of those who are patient.
Third secret: is that, Allah (the Exalted) is testing you with this trial to prove what you really deserve. " And Allah has created the heavens and the earth withtruth, in order that every soul may be rewarded for what ithas earned; and they shall not be wronged." [The Glorious Qur’an, 45:22]
This life is a big test; everything wasplanned before we even came to existence.Therefore your trial is also a part of Allah s Master Plan, so you should not oppose it. Only Allah knows all the reasons why thetrials which aﬄicted you had to be part of His Plan, but what you must know is that this trial will be a great evidence for you against shaytan in the Hereafter, however you must show patience. That s the only way to pass this test.
Tips• Let Allah ﬁll your heart with His Love and Light; let the Qur’an be in your right hand, and the Sunnah in your left; let Allah bless you with the Hikmah/Wisdom; and let Allah guide you on this path of Islam. Know your purpose in life, and do not rush in judging something. Only Allah can judge, you can only assume. If you have to judge then make sure it’s based upon ﬁrm and authentic evidences.
• Never wish to have more than what Allah wills to give you; never be unsatisﬁed with what Allah gave you; and never be ungrateful, because Allah might take away even the little that you have, and then it will be a time of depression and anxiety for you. You will wish at that time to have what you have now, but Allah (the Exalted) will act according to His Perfect Wisdom, He may return that to you, or He may leave you as you are.
• Remember to always seek authentic knowledge. Dive deep in the ocean of knowledge, and collect every pearl that you come across. Strive to not be a hypocrite, by acting upon the knowledge you gain.
• Be truthful when you speak, and do not speak ignorantly about something or someone without knowledge. Know that whoever judges you, Allah will judge him; whoever speaks without knowing you is assuring his place in hell. You should forgive those who hurt you in the past, but if you can’t forgive; then do not bother yourself with them, and let Allah (the Exalted) judge them.
• Put your complete trust in Allah (the Exalted), and depend upon Allah and rely upon Him only, not upon people. Do your best, and Allah will guide you; worship Allah alone, and He will forgive you; stay away from sins, and Allah will raise your rank; and fear and remember Allah wherever you go, because if you forget that Allah is watching you constantly, then you will end up being ignorant and sinning.
• Learn from mistakes, and don’t hate people; but hate their actions. If you are sick, know that with every hardship there is ease; Allah (the Exalted) says: So verily, with the hardship, there is relief, Verily, with the hardship, there is relief. [Qur’an, 94:5]
The happiness of the son of Adamdepends on his being content with what Allah has decreed for him, and the misery of the son of Adam results from his failure to pray Istikhara, and themisery of the son of Adam results from in his discontent with what Allah has decreed for him. [Tirmidhi]