Language, style and accuracy 1


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Language, style and accuracy 1

  1. 1. Language, style and accuracy:help and advice from a language editor (1)- エディターからの英語論文に関するアドバイス - Oita University Warren Raye, PhD Senior Life Sciences Editor Edanz Group Japan 17 February 2012
  2. 2. A little about me… Author ResearcherVirology, Stem Cell Biology, Arthiritis, Immunology & Molecular Biology Lecturer & teacher Senior Life Sciences Editor Edanz Group Japan | 2
  3. 3. Why publish? To exchange ideas globally出版するのは世界規模で意見交換するため …and the science is often necessarily complex Therefore, language clarity is important 明瞭に書くことが重要 Edanz Group Japan | 3
  4. 4. Why publish? New findings of New validated relevance published method published Hypothesis Draw Design conclusions research Perform research Edanz Group | 4
  5. 5. Why publish in English?なぜ英語で出版するのか? English is the international language of science Other scientists want to hear from you! Allows you to become an effective science communicator International reputation enabling collaborations and work opportunities Edanz Group Japan | 5
  6. 6. The importance of reading Ensures the most appropriate research questions are asked Ensures the most appropriate methods are used Ensures results are interpreted in the appropriate context Ensures the most relevant studies are cited Helps with identification of suitable target journals Edanz Group Japan | 6
  7. 7. The importance of reading Edanz Group Japan | 7
  8. 8. Strategies for reading Read Title and Abstract first Self-assess knowledge of topic Read Results or the relevant parts of the Results Read Discussion for interpretation Refer to Introduction and Methods only if necessary Edanz Group Japan | 8
  9. 9. Reporting your research You are telling a story Beginning  Middle  End (Introduction) (Body) (Conclusion) MUST be easy to read AND easy to understand Edanz Group Japan | 9
  10. 10. ‘Tell them three times’3回伝える Introduction/Beginning  Assertion  ‘tell them what you are going to tell them,’ Body/Middle  Evidence  ‘tell them,’ Conclusion/End  Affirmation  ‘tell them again what you told them’. Edanz Group Japan | 10
  11. 11. Basic manuscript structure論文の構造 Expanded IMRaD model  Abstract  Introduction Assertion  Methods  Results Evidence and  Discussion Affirmation  References Edanz Group Japan | 11
  12. 12. Variations of IMRaD Abstract Introduction Results Discussion Methods References Edanz Group Japan | 12
  13. 13. Sections will differ among journals Summary  Graphical Abstract  Research Highlights Introduction Protocols Results & Discussion Conclusions References Supplementary Information Edanz Group Japan | 13
  14. 14. And within research fields Boehmer et al. BMC Cancer 2011, 11:400  Structured Abstract  Background  Methods  Results  Discussion  Conclusions Kampman et al. Curr Nutr Rep 2012, DOI 10.1007/s13668- 011-0004-9  Unstructured Abstract  Introduction  What Do We Know?  Ongoing Challenges and Steps to Be Taken  Conclusions Edanz Group Japan | 14
  15. 15. The ‘write’ order執筆の順序For maximum clarity and consistency, write yourmanuscript in this order: Methods Write during the research Results Introduction Write after selecting your target Discussion journal and analyzing results Abstract Title Write last Edanz Group Japan | 15
  16. 16. Abstract Summarizes your workアブストラクトに研究内容を要約 Concise (100–300 words) 1–4 sentences – describe problem(s) addressed 1–4 sentences –objectives/hypotheses 1–2 sentences – techniques; AVOID details 1–3 sentences – most important results Final sentence – concluding statement Edanz Group Japan | 16
  17. 17. Introduction Why?緒言に研究課題を記述 What question (problem) was studied? The answer to this question is contained within your Introduction Beginning  Middle  End Edanz Group Japan | 17
  18. 18. Introduction Beginning Sufficient background information  Puts your work into context  Start with a broad background General Specific Comprehensive literature review Cite reviews Edanz Group Japan | 18
  19. 19. Introduction Middle Rationale  The reason(s) for doing this work?  Why is it important?  Justify your work Explain how you tried to address the problem (1–2 sentences) DO NOT state results from your study Edanz Group Japan | 19
  20. 20. Introduction End State the methods you plan to use Clearly and explicitly state 1–3 specific hypotheses or objectives of your study Edanz Group Japan | 20
  21. 21. Methods How did you carry out your work?方法 - どのように研究を行ったか - Subheadings  Easier to read Past tense New methods must be described in sufficient detail that they can be reproduced Established methods can be referenced  Save time and effort Edanz Group Japan | 21
  22. 22. Methods Common headings & order Materials/Reagents Patients/Subjects Ethics declarations Animals Study design Clinical trial registration number Treatments Specific methodologies … Statistics Edanz Group Japan | 22
  23. 23. Materials and methods ExampleMaterials and methodsMaterials. Culture media were obtained from Life Technologies(Gaithersburg, MD). Okadaic acid was purchased from Alexis Company Materials described first(Läufelfingen, Switzerland). Antibodies to MEK1/2 and phosphorylatedMAPK were purchased from New England Biolabs (Beverley, MA). Suppliers/locations givenInduction of cell death. Cell death was induced as described previously [15].Briefly, cell death was induced by adding okadaic acid (0-300 nM, Alexis Co.) Clear subheadingsafter washing slice cultures in serum-free medium. Refs used to save spaceLight and electron microscopy. Cultures were fixed in 2.5% glutaraldehydeand 1% formaldehyde, treated with 1% OsO4 in 0.1 M phosphate buffer, pH7.4, dehydrated in a graded series of ethanol and propylene oxide, and flat- Enough information toembedded in an epoxy resin (Durcupan ACM, Fluka, Neu-Ulm, Germany).Semithin sections were stained with toluidine blue, and ultrathin sections reproduce the experimentwere stained with 1% uranyl acetate for 20 min and 1% lead citrate for2 min.Statistics. For statistical analysis, 2-tailed Student’s t test was used to assess Statistical test parametersthe significance of mean differences. Differences were considered significantat a P value of 0.05 or less. provided Edanz Group Japan | 23
  24. 24. Results What did you find? 結果 - 発見したもの - Accurate, brief, clear Use subheadings Use past tense to describe your results When referring to figures and tables, use present tense DO NOT explain your results DO NOT duplicate data among figures, tables and text Edanz Group Japan | 24
  25. 25. Results ExampleResultsOkadaic acid induces death of dentate gyrus neurons selectively.Hippocampal slice cultures treated with OA (1–300 nM) showed selective Clear subheadingscell death of neurons in the dentate gyrus, but neurons in the CA1–3 regionswere largely unaffected. Cell death occurred in a time- and dose-dependentmanner. Propidium iodide staining of treated slides indicated….Electron microscopy revealed a number of ultrastructural changes inhippocampal pyramidal neurons, particularly those in the CA3 region, inslices treated with 300 nM OA for 24 h (Fig 3). These changes included slight Graphics used to savenuclear aggregations (arrow in Fig 3A), accumulation of mitochondriaaround nuclei (arrowheads in Fig 3B) and an increased amount of spaceendoplasmic reticulum (Fig 3C). As shown in Figure 4, the nuclei ofpyramidal neurons in the CA1 and CA3 regions…Involvement of MAPK signaling in the effect of OA. Compared with slicestreated with medium only and treated slices at 0 h, slices treated with 300nM OA showed increasing levels of phosphorylated MAPK at 4 h, 8 h, 16 hand 24 h, with no corresponding change in the levels of total MAPK. This Clear comparisons madeincrease was prevented in slices that were co-incubated with a proteinkinase inhibitor. In addition, the levels of phosphorylated Tau were higher inOA-treated slices than in control slices… Edanz Group Japan | 25
  26. 26. Display items vs. text Present a large amount of data quickly and efficiently  Microarrays, flow cytometry, dose-response curves Present most significant result as a figure or table Simple descriptive statistics in text Necessary?  Supplements text  Assists with communication Edanz Group Japan | 26
  27. 27. Discussion So what?発見内容が意味するもの What do these findings mean? The answer to this question is in the Discussion Beginning  Middle  End Edanz Group Japan | 27
  28. 28. Discussion Beginning AVOID repeating the results section Answer the research question(s) posed Emphasize the major finding(s) first What is your major conclusion, based on the results you have presented? Edanz Group Japan | 28
  29. 29. Discussion Middle Interpret your results …  Compare with other studies  Same or different?  Possible reasons why? Unexpected results Briefly describe any limitations  Samples sizes  Complementary tests  How could experiments be improved? Edanz Group Japan | 29
  30. 30. Discussion End Restate major conclusion(s)  In summary … OR In conclusion … Possible real world applications and implications Suggest future work“Clinical and research priorities include furthering our understanding of thepathogenesis of M. pneumoniae-associated CNS disease, development ofmore reliable serologic assays, and defining the role of quantitative PCR indistinguishing acute infection from asymptomatic carriage and prolongedpost-infection shedding” – Bitun & Richardson Curr Infect Dis Rep 2010, 12:282-290 Pre-emptive defence Edanz Group Japan | 30
  31. 31. Acknowledgments Acknowledge substantive contributions from individuals and organizations AVOID being casual, naming every member of your lab, people unrelated to the work, ex- supervisors Edanz Group Japan | 31
  32. 32. Acknowledgments Examples We really appreciate the fantastic support provided by all the members of the Maeda lab. We thank Dr. Zhongshu Tang for the photoreceptor 661W cell line and Dr. Maria M. Campos for technical support and advice. Wang et al. Journal of Neuroinflammation 2011, 8:173 SEARCH is funded by programme grants from Cancer Research UK (C490/A11019 and C490/A11024). Ali et al. Breast Cancer Research 2011, 13:R118 Edanz Group Japan | 32
  33. 33. Conflicts of Interest Actual OR perceived “Authors MUST disclose interests that might APPEAR to affect their ability to present or review data objectively” Guidelines  Committee on Publication Ethics (COPE)  European Association of Science Editors (EASE)  Council of Science Editors (CSE)  International Committee of Medical Journal Editors (ICMJE)  Good publication practice for communicating company sponsored medical research: the GPP2 Guidelines (BMJ 2009, 339:b4330) Edanz Group Japan | 33
  34. 34. Conflicts of Interest Acknowledge ALL financial support Financial or personal connections to your work  Stocks, patents, consultancies, direct relationships “Warren Raye is a member of a speakers’ bureau, has been a consultant for, and has received research grants from WSR Pharmaceuticals. Daniel McGowan is an employee of McG Pharmaceuticals. Tom da Costa has stated that he has no conflicts of interest.” – adapted from Good publication practice for communicating company sponsored medical research: the GPP2 Guidelines (BMJ 2009, 339:b4330) Edanz Group Japan | 34
  35. 35. Conflicts of Interest Example“The Clinical Trial Service Unit has a staff policy of notaccepting honoraria or other payments from thepharmaceutical industry, except for the reimbursement ofcosts to participate in scientific meetings. Coordinating centremembers of the writing committee (R Collins, J Armitage, SParish, R Peto) have, therefore, only had such costsreimbursed. P Sleight has received honoraria and costs forparticipating in meetings.” – Heart Protection Study Collaborative Group The Lancet 2002, 360:7 Edanz Group Japan | 35
  36. 36. Language英語の質 Most journals are very clear regarding their English requirements Brain Structure & Function Language: Manuscripts will be checked by our copyeditors for spelling and formal style. Clear and concise language will help editors and reviewers concentrate on the scientific content of your paper and thus smooth the peer review process. 査読なしでリジェクトする Edanz Group Japan | 36
  37. 37. Japanese scientific writing style日本語科学論文スタイル Passive voice 受動態 Cause/reason comes first 原因・理由が最初 Followed by the conclusion 結論が後に続く Ki-sho-ten-ketsu 起承転結採用率を高める科学英語の書き方:日本人の論文に特徴的な問題点とは. 2011.International Nursing Review, Supplement 151, 34(3), 94102 Edanz Group Japan | 37
  38. 38. English scientific writing style英語科学論文スタイル Active voice 能動態 The conclusion is stated first 結論を最初に記述 Reasoning or explanation comes after the conclusion 理由や説明が結論の後に来る Beginning  middle  end Edanz Group Japan | 38
  39. 39. Reader Expectations Information is easier to interpret and more uniform when placed where most readers expect to find it Good writers are aware of these expectations Readability Edanz Group Japan | 39
  40. 40. Verb placement Readers expect verbs to closely follow subjects syntactic resolution Subject Sentence Verb . Subject and verb far apart = poor readability Edanz Group Japan | 40
  41. 41. Avoid reader confusion Readers can be confused if subject and verb are separated by too much contentThe smallest of the URFs (URFA6L), a 207-nucleotide (nt) reading frame overlapping out ofphase the [NH2]-terminal portion of theadenosinetriphosphatase (ATPase) subunit 6 gene,has been identified as the animal equivalent of therecently discovered yeast H-ATPase subunit 8 gene. Edanz Group Japan | 41
  42. 42. Avoid reader confusionThe smallest of the URFs (URFA6L) has been identifiedas the animal equivalent of the recently discovered yeastH-ATPase subunit 8 gene; URFA6L is a 207-nucleotide (nt)reading frame overlapping out of phase the [NH2]-terminal portion of the adenosinetriphosphatase (ATPase)subunit 6 gene.We identified the smallest of the URFs (URFA6L) as theanimal equivalent of the recently discovered yeast H-ATPase subunit 8 gene. URFA6L is a … . Edanz Group Japan | 42
  43. 43. Which voice? Active vs. passive Use the active voice unless your target journal states otherwiseBlood samples were collected from 256 patients.We collected blood from 256 patients. Edanz Group Japan | 43
  44. 44. Active voice Subject Verb Active  Sentences written in the active voice are: SIMPLE DIRECT CLEAR EASY TO READ Edanz Group Japan | 44
  45. 45. Stress position Readers focus on information at the end of a sentence. Subject Verb take-home information . “Save the best until last” Edanz Group Japan | 45
  46. 46. Stress positionThe dog sat when her mistress offered a treat.The dog sat when a treat was offered by hermistress.When the mistress offered her a treat, the dog sat. Readers, without thinking, concentrate on the end of a sentence. Edanz Group Japan | 46
  47. 47. Topic position Readers expect a sentence/phrase to be a story about whoever shows up first Subject Topic position Verb Stress position . Edanz Group Japan | 47
  48. 48. Topic position sentence idea idea idea idea Topic link Linkage and context The family went into the courtyard to see the new puppy. The dog sat when her owner offered a treat. Everyone was so excited they broke into applause. However, as the courtyard was situated right next to my bedroom, the sound woke me from my sleep. Edanz Group Japan | 48
  49. 49. Topic sentences Easier to read トピックセンテンス Indicates to the reader the main idea of a paragraph Provides the writer with a focus Should be the first sentence of a paragraph Then discuss/explain the topic Summarize with a concluding sentence Beginning  Middle  End Edanz Group Japan | 49
  50. 50. Topic sentences ExampleIN HIS STUDIES OF THE CONDITIONED REFLEX,PAVLOV WORKED ALMOST ENTIRELY WITH DOGSAND WITH THE SALIVARY REFLEX. Implicit in all of hiswork is the notion that everything the dog learns frompuppyhood on is a result of the association of certainevents (which happen to occur at the same time) with thebiologically adequate stimulus to some native responsesuch as withdrawing, struggling, eating, sex behavior, or thelike. What the dog can learn…Henry Garrett, “Great Experiments in Psychology” Edanz Group Japan | 50