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The victim v's ownership
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The victim v's ownership

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  • 1. Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference
  • 2. I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the footpath. I fall in. I am lost…..I am hopeless. It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.   I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the footpath. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I am in the same place. But, it isn’t my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.   I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the footpath. I see it is there. I still fall in….. It’s a habit….but My eyes are open, I know where I am, It is my fault, I get out immediately.   I walk down the same street, There is a deep hole in the footpath I walk around it.   I walk down a different street!  
  • 3.  
  • 4.
    • “ I am overweight and I can’t do anything about it – it’s genetic.”
    • “ My wife has had an affair, my marriage is over, and it’s her fault.”
    • “ My business is failing because of the economy. I am powerless to turn it around.”
    • “ I am depressed and I can’t find my way out of it – there is nothing I can do about it.”
    • “ I don’t love my wife anymore, but I can’t change the way I feel.”
    • “ I hate my job but I can’t leave my job because I have a family to feed.”
    • “ It’s not my fault.” (It was Eve!)
    • “ Why does it always happen to me?”
    • “ There is nothing I can do about this.”
    • “ I have to…”
    • “ I should…”
    • “ I must…”
    The Victim Thinks...
  • 5. This Dog is Victim to Who?
  • 6.
    • They live in a constant state of perceived powerlessness, refusing to grow up, take responsibility and feel …………… whilst they learn to cope.
    • Possible UBF’s
    • Inadequate/Stupid
    • Responsibility
    • Guilty
    • Shame
    The Victim Refuses to Feel Shame
  • 7.
    • I always have a choice. (I can always change my attitude.)
    • There are only 2 things I have to do;
    • Take up physical space on the earth.
    • Breath.
    • I have to feel… inadequate/stupid/guilty/responsible sometimes in order to grow up!
    The Victim Doesn’t Know
  • 8.
    • I will stop must erbating and I will stop should ing on myself.
    • I will not say or think:
    • “ I should…”
    • “ I have to…”
    • “ I must…”
    • “ You make me feel…”
    • Because, I want to and I choose to!
    • And! I will ask, ‘how did I contribute to this’.
    Determine from this day forth…
  • 9. Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference