What's the Story You're Telling Yourself?
I'm too tired...I don't have time...I want to but I have to do something
else first...I'll do it tomorrow!
The list goes on and on.
These are stories that many people keep telling themselves.
Unfortunately, these stories are holding them back from achieving
their desired goals.
If you fit into this category of individuals then you need to realize that:
The only thing keeping you from what you really want is the
STORY you keep telling about why you can't have it!
You can call stories EXCUSES if that works better for you. The point is
that in order to achieve your goals you need to stop telling yourself
(and others) stories about why things haven't worked out for you OR
that you don't have time (to exercise) OR whatever else!
Why do we make up stories in the first place?
Every human being has the same needs. You just have to figure out
which of those needs is being met by making up stories and believing
The 6 basic human needs are the following:
1. the need for certainty
2. the need for variety
3. the need for significance
4. the need to feel connected and loved
5. the need for growth
6. the need to contribute
For instance, if you're looking to lose weight and have not succeeded,
then perhaps you've been telling yourself that you don't have time to
exercise or that other people might judge you while you're working.
As a result, you haven't taken action.
But here's the interesting part...does your story give you a feeling of
significance? Does it make you feel more connected or loved by
others? Does your story give you a sense of certainty?
I'm almost certain that it doesn't give you a sense of growth or
contribution (which are ultimately what we want to be striving for)!
Think about this for a second. Everything we do, we do for a reason.
Some people tell stories so that others will empathize or feel sorry for
them and so they feel a sense of connection or love from other people.
The point is that you need to find other ways to get these primal needs
met. If you keep telling a story to get sympathy from others you will
not succeed at attaining your goal because you've associated too much
pleasure to the story (because of the attention you receive).
So here's what you need to do to break the habit...
Ask yourself the following question:
"What is this story costing me?"
Get associated with the pain that your story(ies) have cost you. What
have you missed out on? What have you not become?
Once you identify these issues then you can redirect your energy to
find empowering ways to feel a sense of growth, contribution, and love
each and every day.
Exercising, eating well, learning new things, loving others and
yourself, are just a few examples of empowering DAILY HABITS that
will make feel more fulfilled.
Stop telling stories and take action!