Cut the Crap: Why Marketing Hasn't Changed And You Should Stop Chasing Shiny Things

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Cut the Crap: Why Marketing Hasn't Changed And You Should Stop Chasing Shiny Things

  1. Why marketing hasn’t changed, andyou should avoid shiny things.Ian Lurie@portentintian@portent.comRelated links at PORTENT.CO/sigannt
  2. HOW THIS WILL GO
  3. WHERE CRAP COMES FROMTHE LAWS OF MARKETINGAPPLYING THEM
  4. HOW THIS WILL GOTimeRantinessRantiness Over Time
  5. HOW THIS WILL GOTimeBroadterminessHand-waviness Over Time
  6. GREAT IDEA THAT WORKS
  7. EVERYONE GETS PUMPED
  8. TOTAL FAILURE
  9. WRITE _____ IS DEAD BLOG POST
  10. DID THE INTERNETREVOLUTIONIZE MARKETING?
  11. NOPE. STILL GIMMICKS.(EASILY SHOCKED? SKIP THE NEXT SLIDE)(REALLY)
  12. CRAP
  13. CRAP
  14. CRAP
  15. CRAP
  16. CRAP
  17. ‘BIG DATA’
  18. ‘CONTENT MARKETING’
  19. ‘Charlie Sheen’
  20. ABANDON ALL HOPE
  21. WHAT. THE. HELL.
  22. WHY?!!!!
  23. GREAT IDEAS THOUGHTLESSLYAPPLIED BECOME GIMMICKSLURIE’S MARKETING LAW #.5
  24. GREAT IDEAS THOUGHTLESSLYAPPLIED BECOME GIMMICKSCRAPLURIE’S MARKETING LAW #.5
  25. One of the disadvantages of doingeverything mathematically, byresearch, is that after a while,everybody does it the same way…William Bernbach, 1963
  26. Has a marketing great ideaNow its a gimmickCompany ACompany CCompany ETHE GRAPH OF SHAME
  27. CRAP MARKETING FINDS ANIDEA THAT WORKS, THENBEATS IT TO DEATH WITH BIGNASTY GNARLY CLUBS.CRAP MARKETINGFINDS AN IDEATHAT WORKS, THENBEATS IT TO DEATHWITH BIG NASTYGNARLY CLUBS.LURIE’S MARKETING LAW #.75
  28. CRAP
  29. CRAP
  30. CRAP
  31. CRAP
  32. CRAP
  33. CRAP MARKETINGTRIES TO SHOCK YOUINTO REACTING
  34. CRAP MARKETING CREATESCARS MADE OF PEOPLE.STILL REALLY DISTURBING
  35. AND GLITTERY VAMPIRESTOO DISTURBING TO SHOW
  36. GREAT MARKETINGCREATES SIGNIFICANCELURIE’S MARKETING LAW #1
  37. SIGNIFICANCETHE QUALITY OF BEING WORTHY OFATTENTION TO PEOPLE WHO MAYNEVER BUY, BUT WILL ALWAYSSPREAD THE WORD.
  38. WEIRDUSEFULSIGNIFICANT+LURIE’S MARKETING LAW #2
  39. WEIRD EXISTS AT THEINTERSECTION OF IDEAS
  40. LIKE MUSICCAN’T DANCEGANGNAM STYLE
  41. NEEDAPPLIANCESLIKE TO SEESTUFF GETSMASHEDWILL IT BLEND
  42. LIKES MOVIES WITHEXPLOSIONSEVERY SUMMERBLOCKBUSTERFAIL: NO DISTINCTION
  43. LIKES MOVIES WITHEXPLOSIONSTHE MATRIXSUCCESS: INTERSECTION…AND PHILOSOPHY
  44. CHANEL NO 5FAIL: NO DISTINCTIONLIKES BRAD PITT
  45. OLD MILWAUKEESUCCESS: INTERSECTIONLIKES WILL FERRELL…AND BEER
  46. ‘DUCK CALLS’FAIL: BROAD PPC BUYWANTS ADUCK CALL
  47. ‘GREEN DUCK CALLS’SUCCESS: INTERSECTIONWANTS ADUCK CALLTHAT ISGREEN
  48. USEFUL PROVIDESLASTING VALUE
  49. “WE CHOOSE TO GOTO THE MOON…”
  50. GREAT MARKETINGCREATES SIGNIFICANCE.
  51. NO CRAP
  52. THE WEIRDDOES IT EXIST AT THEINTERSECTION OF IDEAS?
  53. TALK ABOUT HOW YOUR FUELREDUCES EMISSIONSFAILPEOPLE WHO’VE HEARDTHIS BEFORE
  54. TALK ABOUT HOW YOURFUEL REDUCES EMISSIONSINTERSECTIONPEOPLE WHOCARE A LOT
  55. USEFULDOES THE CONTENT ITSELFPROVIDE LASTING VALUE?
  56. WRITE 150 ARTICLESFOR $5 EACHFAIL
  57. WRITE ONE FANTASTIC GUIDEUSEFUL
  58. LINK BUYING
  59. NO CRAP
  60. DISASTER SURFING
  61. NO CRAP
  62. YOUR MARKETING CONNECTSGENUINE VALUE TO THE PEOPLETHAT WANT AND NEED IT.
  63. @PORTENTINTIAN@PORTENT.COMPORTENT.CO/siganntTHROW MONEY

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