1
20 21 Copywriting Disasters
(And how to avoid them)
Ian Lurie
CEO & Founder
3
Our secret lair
4
portent.co/20copy
yes, like this, no ‘m’
Tweet your questions with #portentu
55
We’ve all been there.
66
by golly,
ian, this
copy is
perfect!!!
The copy’s perfect
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
 ...
77
The client loves it
we love it!!
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
 ...
88
and then…
99
boom.
ian, you
suck.
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  co...
1010
20 disasters haunt us all.
1111
I’ve been in every one.
1212
But you can avoid them, sometimes.
They’ve inevitable. They hit all of us.
1313
Learn from my pain.
1414
Three disaster classifications
embarrassing: no permanent consequences
bad: you may get fired
gods preserve us (gpu): I...
1515
Here we go.
1616
Disaster 1: The Great Philsophy Massacre
1717
Uh-huh
What’s wrong with this picture?
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
...
1818
Cost: $5,000
Classification: Bad
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
...
1919
Use a #$@&%*! spell checker
Avoidable
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
 ...
2020
Read it backwards
Avoidable
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  am...
2121
Have someone else read it?
Avoidable
Our	
  Philsophy:	
  Smart,	
  Efficient,	
  Quick	
  
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  ...
2222
Disaster 2: The incomplete headline
2323
Egads.
Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment
2424
Egads.
Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment
Teacher, Student Research Bee Fertility
2525
Really, really embarrassing
Classification: Embarrassing
Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment
2626
But, like I always say…
2727
When life gives you lemons…
2828
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
Laugh at someone else.
2929
The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Avoidable
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
3030
The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Avoidable
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy Case
3131
The blank sheet of paper test
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
If I write this headline on a blank sheet of paper and show ...
3232
Disaster 3: Search term avoidance
3333
Wedding garment
Bridesmaid dress?
3434
Destination formalwear
Bridesmaid dress?
3535
Destination dress
Bridesmaid dress?
3636
Failure to use audience’s lexicon
Classification: Bad
3737
Have a brain
Avoidable
3838
Use WordStream
Avoidable
3939
Use SEMRush
Avoidable
4040
Use Surveys
Avoidable
4141
USE ANYTHING BUT GUESSING!!!
Avoidable
4242
Disaster 4: Baffle ‘em with
4343
I am ashamed
I wrote this
We create extant systems by adapting legacy infrastructure
to current interprative mechanis...
4444
Drives away customers like the plague.
Sounds like I sneezed repeatedly on the page.
Classification: Bad
We create ext...
4545
Knowledge of a word does not require its use.
Avoidable
4646
Also: The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Avoidable
4747
The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
If I write this headline on a blank sheet of paper and show ...
4848
The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
Not even if I gave them a dictionary.
We create extant syste...
4949
The Blank Sheet of Paper Test
Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
Better. Not great. But better.
Our products extend the life ...
5050
Disaster 5: The poop sandwich
5151
Yummy on the outside
IAN LURIE // JAN 7 2013
How to Create an Online Experience
for Humans
Marketers Dying By A Thous...
5252
Yummy on the outside
Puke-inducing on the inside
5353
That one’s not going in the portfolio
Classification: Embarrassing
5454
Sorry, I got nothing.
Inevitable
5555
(except don’t rush to publish)
Inevitable
5656
Disaster 6: Writer’s block
5757
You’re screwed.
Classification: GPU
5858
Free writing
Google
Enigma.io
Mitigate
5959
Step. Away. From the desk.
Mitigate
6060
Read something inspiring.
Mitigate
6161
Disaster 7: The stolen idea (intentional)
6262
I was desperate!!!!
Hey, look
6363
Just own it
Classification: Embarrassing
Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
6464
It’s OK
Inevitable
Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
6565
If you own it
Inevitable
Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
6666
Disaster 8: Plagiarism
6767
…was in 4th grade.
Last time I did this…
6868
Classification: GPU
6969
Classification: GPU
7070
Go to jail. Go directly to jail. Because you suck.
Classification: GPU
7171
Using a scraper doesn’t make it OK.
Classification: GPU
7272
It is a bad thing. It is not the sincerest form of flattery.
Avoidable
7373
Get permission! It’s not that hard!
Avoidable
7474
Add value. Analyze. Summarize. Expand.
Avoidable
7575
Disaster 9: Plagiarism (second-hand)
7676
…but really, what are the odds
Never done this one (as far as I know)
7777
7878
You could really get into trouble
Classification: GPUI’m being generous here.
Because you’re so young
7979
A desperate copywriter. That’s what happened.
What happened?
8080
You could really get into trouble.
Classification: GPU
8181
For example, someone could call you out in a webinar that’s
recorded and placed on Slideshare for all time.
Classifica...
8282
Use the Googles!
Avoidable
8383
Disaster 10: Telepathy
8484
…was last week.
Last time I did this…
8585
…was last week.
Last time I did this…
8585
I… am a loser.
Classification: Embarrassing
8787
Disaster 11: The bad comma
8888
This was me.
Yep.
Best-in-class restroom flight attendant and
food service.
8989
This was me.
Yep.
Best-in-class restroom, flight attendant and
food service.
9090
Oy.
Classification: Bad
Best-in-class restroom flight attendant and
food service.
9191
Maybe read it before you send it
Avoidable
Best-in-class restroom, flight attendant and
food service.
9292
Disaster 12: Autocorrect
9393
Now you can do it on Twitter, too!
It’s not just for SMS any more
9494
And potentially stock market-trashing
Classification: Bad
9595
Read before you send
Avoidable
9696
Disaster 13: The unsafe structure
9797
Enjoy a challenge
No, readers do not
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipisicing	
  elit,	
...
9898
Just stupid. I shouldn’t get paid.
Classification: Bad
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipi...
9999
No paragraph longer than 6 lines
Avoidable
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipisicing	
  e...
100100
No more than 3 paragraphs w/o a break
Avoidable
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipisici...
101101
How about (useful) images?
Avoidable
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipisicing	
  elit,...
102102
10-15 words/line
Avoidable
Lorem	
  ipsum	
  dolor	
  sit	
  amet,	
  consectetur	
  adipisicing	
  elit,	
  sed	
 ...
103103
Learn a little typography
Avoidable
104104
Pearsonified’s Golden Ratio Typography Calculator
105105
Disaster 14: Giving offense
106106
This wasn’t me
Actually
107107
whoa.
Still,
108108
Just think about whether you want the result you’ll get.
Avoidable?
109109
And be aware of your cultural context.
Avoidable?
110110
Also, don’t be an asshole.
Avoidable?
Also, don’t be an asshole.
111111
Disaster 15: Going passive
112112
If I get paid by the word
Nice
With our tires, customers will ride with fewer flat tires.
113113
It’s like I’m talking to you but facing the other way
Classification: Bad
With our tires, customers will ride with f...
114114
Use active voice. Talk to the reader.
Easily avoided
Our bicycle tires help you ride with fewer flats.
With our tire...
115115
Use active voice. Talk to the reader.
Easily avoided
Avoid the plague words
“indeed”
“regardless”
116116
Disaster 16: Writing angry, or drunk, or whatever
117117
I don’t think I’ll be hearing from them any time soon
Yikes
118118
May cause other disasters
Classification: Bad, maybe GPU
119119
Walk away for a minute
Avoidable
120120
Disaster 17: Getting your facts wrong
121121
Sigh.
Let’s just play that back, shall we?
122122
Ignorance at 500 decibels is still ignorance
Classification: Bad, maybe GPU
123123
Immediately own up. Fix it. Apologize.
Mitigate
124124
Mitigate
125125
Don’t just delete it, unless asked or legally required.
Mitigate
126126
Disaster 18:
Treating your customer like an algorithm
127127
I won’t believe you.
Don’t tell me you haven’t done this
This great wedding dress uses white chiffon for a dress
tha...
128128
Painful, actually
Classification: Bad
This great wedding dress uses white chiffon for a dress
that’s stylish at any w...
129129
It doesn’t work anyway. Give it up.
Avoidable
seriously,
I've seen it
before
130130
Disaster 19: Being mealy-mouthed
131131
Who am I, Michael Dukakis? Donald Rummesfeld?
Oh, just say it!!!!
I think that, and this is just my opinion,
tablet...
132132
What the hell, man.
Classification: Embarrassing
I think that, and this is just my opinion,
tablets are just a fad.
133133
Just listen to Ogilvy
Avoidable
“Swing for the fences”
134134
If you don’t smile when you read it, do it again
Avoidable
Tablets are the Apple Newton of 2003.
135135
If you don’t grimace when you read it, do it again
Avoidable
Tablets are the stupidest idea ever.
136136
This isn’t trolling. It’s not writing angry. It’s making a statement.
Avoidable
137137
Disaster 20: Creating a checklist
138138
before it spreads too far.
We have to stop it
1.  Write 400 words
2. Use the key phrase 10 times
3. Make the headli...
139139
Kind of stupid, really.
Classification: Bad
1.  Write 400 words
2. Use the key phrase 10 times
3. Make the headline ...
140140
You need something.
Mitigate
1. When you’re done, read it backwards
2. Make sure at least 1 colleague reads it
3. W...
141141
Make repeatable stuff into a checklist.
Mitigate
1. When you’re done, read it backwards
2. Make sure at least 1 coll...
142142
Disaster 21: Going for perfect
143143
is waiting for the ‘perfect’ topic
Everything I’ve never written
144144
is waiting for the ‘perfect’ story
Everything I’ve never written
145145
is waiting for the ‘perfect’ idea
Everything I’ve never written
146146
Get out there and write
147
Created by Ian Lurie, CEO & Founder of Portent, Inc.
Find him @portentint
or www.slideshare.net/wrttnwrd
Find his comp...
148148
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20 Copywriting Disasters (and how to avoid them)

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We've all made them: Those copywriting mistakes that leave us hanging our heads in shame 10 years later. I've made every single one.

So, benefit from my pain. This presentation goes through my top 20 mistakes (plus a bonus), and how you can avoid them.

Published in: Marketing
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  • perfect*
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  • NZT 48 AND OTHER PAIN RELIEVE PILLS ( dr.caya1@techemail.com )

    Others
    ACTAVIS PROMETHAZINE WITH CODEINE PURPLE COUGH SYRUP
    Oxycotin, oxycodone , opama ,xanax, pollen , MDMA,vicodin etc

    NOTE: SEEDS AND GRINDERS ARE ALSO AVAILABLE
    Our quality is the best you can find around and we. Do email us and place your order.Include your contact number when doing so.Willing to mix and match strains.Safe and secured We global shipping discretely Contact Above email


    NZT 48 AND OTHER PAIN RELIEVE PILLS ( dr.caya1@techemail.com )

    Others
    ACTAVIS PROMETHAZINE WITH CODEINE PURPLE COUGH SYRUP
    Oxycotin, oxycodone , opama ,xanax, pollen , MDMA,vicodin etc

    NOTE: SEEDS AND GRINDERS ARE ALSO AVAILABLE
    Our quality is the best you can find around and we. Do email us and place your order.Include your contact number when doing so.Willing to mix and match strains.Safe and secured We global shipping discretely Contact Above email


    NZT 48 AND OTHER PAIN RELIEVE PILLS ( dr.caya1@techemail.com )

    Others
    ACTAVIS PROMETHAZINE WITH CODEINE PURPLE COUGH SYRUP
    Oxycotin, oxycodone , opama ,xanax, pollen , MDMA,vicodin etc

    NOTE: SEEDS AND GRINDERS ARE ALSO AVAILABLE
    Our quality is the best you can find around and we. Do email us and place your order.Include your contact number when doing so.Willing to mix and match strains.Safe and secured We global shipping discretely Contact Above email
    NZT 48 AND OTHER PAIN RELIEVE PILLS ( dr.caya1@techemail.com )
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  • I do what I can :) Glad you liked it.
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  • Several laughing out loud moments. Thanks!
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20 Copywriting Disasters (and how to avoid them)

  1. 1. 1 20 21 Copywriting Disasters (And how to avoid them) Ian Lurie CEO & Founder
  2. 2. 3 Our secret lair
  3. 3. 4 portent.co/20copy yes, like this, no ‘m’ Tweet your questions with #portentu
  4. 4. 55 We’ve all been there.
  5. 5. 66 by golly, ian, this copy is perfect!!! The copy’s perfect Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  
  6. 6. 77 The client loves it we love it!! Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  
  7. 7. 88 and then…
  8. 8. 99 boom. ian, you suck. Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  
  9. 9. 1010 20 disasters haunt us all.
  10. 10. 1111 I’ve been in every one.
  11. 11. 1212 But you can avoid them, sometimes. They’ve inevitable. They hit all of us.
  12. 12. 1313 Learn from my pain.
  13. 13. 1414 Three disaster classifications embarrassing: no permanent consequences bad: you may get fired gods preserve us (gpu): I don’t know you
  14. 14. 1515 Here we go.
  15. 15. 1616 Disaster 1: The Great Philsophy Massacre
  16. 16. 1717 Uh-huh What’s wrong with this picture? Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt   in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  
  17. 17. 1818 Cost: $5,000 Classification: Bad Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt   in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  
  18. 18. 1919 Use a #$@&%*! spell checker Avoidable Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt   in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  
  19. 19. 2020 Read it backwards Avoidable Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt   in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  
  20. 20. 2121 Have someone else read it? Avoidable Our  Philsophy:  Smart,  Efficient,  Quick   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et   dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis   nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex   ea  commodo  consequat.       Did  I  men)on  how  efficient  we  are?   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.   Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt   in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  
  21. 21. 2222 Disaster 2: The incomplete headline
  22. 22. 2323 Egads. Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment
  23. 23. 2424 Egads. Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment Teacher, Student Research Bee Fertility
  24. 24. 2525 Really, really embarrassing Classification: Embarrassing Teacher, Student in Fertility Experiment
  25. 25. 2626 But, like I always say…
  26. 26. 2727 When life gives you lemons…
  27. 27. 2828 Supreme Court Tries Sodomy Laugh at someone else.
  28. 28. 2929 The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Avoidable Supreme Court Tries Sodomy
  29. 29. 3030 The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Avoidable Supreme Court Tries Sodomy Case
  30. 30. 3131 The blank sheet of paper test Supreme Court Tries Sodomy If I write this headline on a blank sheet of paper and show it to a stranger, will they know what I’m talking about? Correctly?
  31. 31. 3232 Disaster 3: Search term avoidance
  32. 32. 3333 Wedding garment Bridesmaid dress?
  33. 33. 3434 Destination formalwear Bridesmaid dress?
  34. 34. 3535 Destination dress Bridesmaid dress?
  35. 35. 3636 Failure to use audience’s lexicon Classification: Bad
  36. 36. 3737 Have a brain Avoidable
  37. 37. 3838 Use WordStream Avoidable
  38. 38. 3939 Use SEMRush Avoidable
  39. 39. 4040 Use Surveys Avoidable
  40. 40. 4141 USE ANYTHING BUT GUESSING!!! Avoidable
  41. 41. 4242 Disaster 4: Baffle ‘em with
  42. 42. 4343 I am ashamed I wrote this We create extant systems by adapting legacy infrastructure to current interprative mechanisms, thereby building longer time-to-obsolescence.
  43. 43. 4444 Drives away customers like the plague. Sounds like I sneezed repeatedly on the page. Classification: Bad We create extant systems by adapting legacy infrastructure to current interprative mechanisms, thereby building longer time-to-obsolescence.
  44. 44. 4545 Knowledge of a word does not require its use. Avoidable
  45. 45. 4646 Also: The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Avoidable
  46. 46. 4747 The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Supreme Court Tries Sodomy If I write this headline on a blank sheet of paper and show it to a stranger, will they know what I’m talking about? Correctly? We create extant systems by adapting legacy blah blah blah blah blah mumble blah
  47. 47. 4848 The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Supreme Court Tries Sodomy Not even if I gave them a dictionary. We create extant systems by adapting legacy blah blah blah blah blah mumble blah
  48. 48. 4949 The Blank Sheet of Paper Test Supreme Court Tries Sodomy Better. Not great. But better. Our products extend the life of existing enterprise software by connecting it to modern, more usable interfaces.
  49. 49. 5050 Disaster 5: The poop sandwich
  50. 50. 5151 Yummy on the outside IAN LURIE // JAN 7 2013 How to Create an Online Experience for Humans Marketers Dying By A Thousand Data Points What Project Managers Actually Do Announcing RainGage One-Trick Ponies Get Shot: Doing Digital Strategy Right Research: Site Speed Is Hurting Your Everyone’s Revenue Advertising should Marketing is what we do. Advertising is what we often make as a result. It sounds very fulfilling. Alas, the process usually looks something like this: 1. The marketing team builds out brilliant messaging and brand story. 2. They brainstorm some nifty ideas. 3. Then, they pull together a completely incomprehensible collection of marketing platitudes creative brief around the ideas, which they pitch over the wall to management. 4. Every yahoo who thinks they know anything about marketingAll stakeholders review the brief. All draw their own conclusions. None of those conclusions agree. 5. Armed with these insights, the creative team staggers into a separate room to spawn beautiful but confusing creative that complies with corporate branding guidelines. 6. Stakeholders review the creative and say “This is great!” 7. The marketing team reviews the creative and says “This won’t convert!” Then they pout. 8. In response, the creative team adds a ‘click here’ button. 9. It goes live. 10. Everyone gets drunk. I have a Diet Coke. 11. Congrats! It’s advertising! The result is an utter turd that converts about as well as opening your office window and yelling “BUY MY STUFF.” But by then the process has sucked out your will to live. You crawl across the finish line, then go hunting for chocolate. Yes, I’m prone to exaggeration. It isn’t always this bad. Once in a while everything falls into place. But I’m stuck in a middle seat on a 7-hour flight. So I’m grumpy. Er. More grumpy. Why? Please, tell me why? Why does this happen over and over? I could name all the usual suspects: Poor communications, lack of organizational clarity, no sense of vision, no accountability, blah blah blah. But I think it comes down to discipline: We all know what we need to do. Getting everyone to do it every time, day after day is something else entirely. Consistency is a butt-kicker. Anyone who’s tried to get their teen-ager to carry his damned dishes to the dishwasher and actually put them in after each of his 9 daily meals knows whereof I speak. We repeat the same mistakes, over and over. And over. When it comes to creating great marketing, we’re teenagers. Somehow, we have to keep the real goal of marketing and advertising front-of-mind, even when deadlines, political squabbles and turf wars drive us all nuts. My solution: A USB-capable work monitor and kidney-puncher. But I’ve been told that’s not practical. The better way: #AdvertisingShould Fortunately, the folks at Copacino & Fujikado came up with a much better idea. They’ve started advertisingshould.com. It’s a Twitter-based scrapbook of ads wisdom. You can contribute to and learn from the yummy advertising goodness within by doing 3 simple things: 1. Bookmark it, and check back every day for a nice reminder what we should be doing. 2. Keep an eye on the #advertisingshould hashtag on Twitter. 3. And contribute: Tweet how you think advertising should work, and use the hashtag #advertisingshould. Keep it going and it’ll keep us all on our toes. And, see your name in the dim light of my d-list celebrity status! I’m going to do a list of my favorites in a few weeks. This may seem like a little thing. But it’s the little things that make projects successful, and marketing great: A little reminder now and then goes a long way. And it’s better than USB-administered corporal punishment. So go contribute your ideas to #advertisingshould. Ian Lurie CEO Ian Lurie is CEO and founder of Portent Inc. He is co-author of the 2nd edition of the Web Marketing All-In-One for Dummies and wrote the sections on SEO, blogging, social media and web analytics. He's recorded training for Lynda.com, writes regularly for the Portent Blog and has been published on AllThingsD, Forbes.com and TechCrunch. And, Ian speaks at conferences around the world, including SearchLove, MozCon, SIC and ad:Tech. Read More Related Articles 2 Comments JUSTIN MARKETING ONLINE // JAN 8 2013, 00:08:06 Hey Ian, Love the tips (and of course the creative graphics) You make a great distinction between marketing/ advertising and one i have for sales vs. marketing is marketing gets the horse to the lake. Sales make the horse drink the water. Look forward to more of your posts happy 2013 BEN // JAN 15 2013, 14:53:27 This is the neatest idea! I can’t wait to follow this trend on Twitter. Thanks so much for sharing. Comments are closed. Net Neutrality: It's more than streaming video Lead by Example: 10 Ways to Be a Successful Team Leader Yep. I'm back. SUBSCRIBE TO THE RSS FEED BLOG TOPICS CONNECT PPC . SEO . Social Media CONVERSE Copywriting . Creative CONVERT Analytics . Internet Marketing RECENT POSTS THIS WEEK POPULAR ALL TIME STAY UP TO DATE. Sign up to receive our Email Series! E-Mail By clicking submit you are agreeing to our terms and conditions and privacy policy. SIGN ME UP › Internet Marketing Portent, Inc. Follow us: Phone: 206.575.3740 Email: info@portent.com 506 2nd Ave. Suite 1700 Seattle, WA 98104-2354 Directions Careers Staff Philosophy News Webinar Blog © 1995-2014, Portent, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Privacy Policy TweetTweet 121 36ShareShare 2730LikeLike Services Work Advantage Insights Tools Blog Contact
  51. 51. 5252 Yummy on the outside Puke-inducing on the inside
  52. 52. 5353 That one’s not going in the portfolio Classification: Embarrassing
  53. 53. 5454 Sorry, I got nothing. Inevitable
  54. 54. 5555 (except don’t rush to publish) Inevitable
  55. 55. 5656 Disaster 6: Writer’s block
  56. 56. 5757 You’re screwed. Classification: GPU
  57. 57. 5858 Free writing Google Enigma.io Mitigate
  58. 58. 5959 Step. Away. From the desk. Mitigate
  59. 59. 6060 Read something inspiring. Mitigate
  60. 60. 6161 Disaster 7: The stolen idea (intentional)
  61. 61. 6262 I was desperate!!!! Hey, look
  62. 62. 6363 Just own it Classification: Embarrassing Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
  63. 63. 6464 It’s OK Inevitable Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
  64. 64. 6565 If you own it Inevitable Stolen blatantly from Walter Chen and everyone else who’s used it
  65. 65. 6666 Disaster 8: Plagiarism
  66. 66. 6767 …was in 4th grade. Last time I did this…
  67. 67. 6868 Classification: GPU
  68. 68. 6969 Classification: GPU
  69. 69. 7070 Go to jail. Go directly to jail. Because you suck. Classification: GPU
  70. 70. 7171 Using a scraper doesn’t make it OK. Classification: GPU
  71. 71. 7272 It is a bad thing. It is not the sincerest form of flattery. Avoidable
  72. 72. 7373 Get permission! It’s not that hard! Avoidable
  73. 73. 7474 Add value. Analyze. Summarize. Expand. Avoidable
  74. 74. 7575 Disaster 9: Plagiarism (second-hand)
  75. 75. 7676 …but really, what are the odds Never done this one (as far as I know)
  76. 76. 7777
  77. 77. 7878 You could really get into trouble Classification: GPUI’m being generous here. Because you’re so young
  78. 78. 7979 A desperate copywriter. That’s what happened. What happened?
  79. 79. 8080 You could really get into trouble. Classification: GPU
  80. 80. 8181 For example, someone could call you out in a webinar that’s recorded and placed on Slideshare for all time. Classification: GPU
  81. 81. 8282 Use the Googles! Avoidable
  82. 82. 8383 Disaster 10: Telepathy
  83. 83. 8484 …was last week. Last time I did this…
  84. 84. 8585 …was last week. Last time I did this…
  85. 85. 8585 I… am a loser. Classification: Embarrassing
  86. 86. 8787 Disaster 11: The bad comma
  87. 87. 8888 This was me. Yep. Best-in-class restroom flight attendant and food service.
  88. 88. 8989 This was me. Yep. Best-in-class restroom, flight attendant and food service.
  89. 89. 9090 Oy. Classification: Bad Best-in-class restroom flight attendant and food service.
  90. 90. 9191 Maybe read it before you send it Avoidable Best-in-class restroom, flight attendant and food service.
  91. 91. 9292 Disaster 12: Autocorrect
  92. 92. 9393 Now you can do it on Twitter, too! It’s not just for SMS any more
  93. 93. 9494 And potentially stock market-trashing Classification: Bad
  94. 94. 9595 Read before you send Avoidable
  95. 95. 9696 Disaster 13: The unsafe structure
  96. 96. 9797 Enjoy a challenge No, readers do not Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore   magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud   exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo   consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint   occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia   deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore   magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud   exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo   consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint   occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia   deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit   amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor   incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim   veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip   ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in   reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat   nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,   sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  i  
  97. 97. 9898 Just stupid. I shouldn’t get paid. Classification: Bad Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore   magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud   exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo   consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint   occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia   deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing   elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore   magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud   exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo   consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate   velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint   occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia   deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit   amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor   incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim   veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip   ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in   reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat   nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,   sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.   Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  i  
  98. 98. 9999 No paragraph longer than 6 lines Avoidable Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.       Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa   qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum   dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod   tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad   minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut   aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.       Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse   cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat   cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit   anim  id  est  laborum.     Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.       Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.       Occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia   deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit   amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod  tempor   incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad  minim   veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip   ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  
  99. 99. 100100 No more than 3 paragraphs w/o a break Avoidable Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.       Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa   qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum   dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod   tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad   minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut   aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.       Subheading  here   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse   cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat   cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit   anim  id  est  laborum.     Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.       Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse   cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat   cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit   anim  id  est  laborum.    
  100. 100. 101101 How about (useful) images? Avoidable Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.       Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa   qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum   dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod   tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad   minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut   aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.       Subheading  here   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse   cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat   cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit   anim  id  est  laborum.                                 Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.    
  101. 101. 102102 10-15 words/line Avoidable Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.       Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa   qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est  laborum.  Lorem  ipsum   dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do  eiusmod   tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut  enim  ad   minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco  laboris  nisi  ut   aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.       Subheading  here   Duis  aute  irure  dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse   cillum  dolore  eu  fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat   cupidatat  non  proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit   anim  id  est  laborum.                                 Lorem  ipsum  dolor  sit  amet,  consectetur  adipisicing  elit,  sed  do   eiusmod  tempor  incididunt  ut  labore  et  dolore  magna  aliqua.  Ut   enim  ad  minim  veniam,  quis  nostrud  exercitaCon  ullamco   laboris  nisi  ut  aliquip  ex  ea  commodo  consequat.  Duis  aute  irure   dolor  in  reprehenderit  in  voluptate  velit  esse  cillum  dolore  eu   fugiat  nulla  pariatur.  Excepteur  sint  occaecat  cupidatat  non   proident,  sunt  in  culpa  qui  officia  deserunt  mollit  anim  id  est   laborum.    
  102. 102. 103103 Learn a little typography Avoidable
  103. 103. 104104 Pearsonified’s Golden Ratio Typography Calculator
  104. 104. 105105 Disaster 14: Giving offense
  105. 105. 106106 This wasn’t me Actually
  106. 106. 107107 whoa. Still,
  107. 107. 108108 Just think about whether you want the result you’ll get. Avoidable?
  108. 108. 109109 And be aware of your cultural context. Avoidable?
  109. 109. 110110 Also, don’t be an asshole. Avoidable? Also, don’t be an asshole.
  110. 110. 111111 Disaster 15: Going passive
  111. 111. 112112 If I get paid by the word Nice With our tires, customers will ride with fewer flat tires.
  112. 112. 113113 It’s like I’m talking to you but facing the other way Classification: Bad With our tires, customers will ride with fewer flat tires.
  113. 113. 114114 Use active voice. Talk to the reader. Easily avoided Our bicycle tires help you ride with fewer flats. With our tires, customers will ride with fewer flat tires.
  114. 114. 115115 Use active voice. Talk to the reader. Easily avoided Avoid the plague words “indeed” “regardless”
  115. 115. 116116 Disaster 16: Writing angry, or drunk, or whatever
  116. 116. 117117 I don’t think I’ll be hearing from them any time soon Yikes
  117. 117. 118118 May cause other disasters Classification: Bad, maybe GPU
  118. 118. 119119 Walk away for a minute Avoidable
  119. 119. 120120 Disaster 17: Getting your facts wrong
  120. 120. 121121 Sigh. Let’s just play that back, shall we?
  121. 121. 122122 Ignorance at 500 decibels is still ignorance Classification: Bad, maybe GPU
  122. 122. 123123 Immediately own up. Fix it. Apologize. Mitigate
  123. 123. 124124 Mitigate
  124. 124. 125125 Don’t just delete it, unless asked or legally required. Mitigate
  125. 125. 126126 Disaster 18: Treating your customer like an algorithm
  126. 126. 127127 I won’t believe you. Don’t tell me you haven’t done this This great wedding dress uses white chiffon for a dress that’s stylish at any wedding. You won’t find a better wedding dress anywhere else!
  127. 127. 128128 Painful, actually Classification: Bad This great wedding dress uses white chiffon for a dress that’s stylish at any wedding. You won’t find a better wedding dress anywhere else!
  128. 128. 129129 It doesn’t work anyway. Give it up. Avoidable seriously, I've seen it before
  129. 129. 130130 Disaster 19: Being mealy-mouthed
  130. 130. 131131 Who am I, Michael Dukakis? Donald Rummesfeld? Oh, just say it!!!! I think that, and this is just my opinion, tablets are just a fad.
  131. 131. 132132 What the hell, man. Classification: Embarrassing I think that, and this is just my opinion, tablets are just a fad.
  132. 132. 133133 Just listen to Ogilvy Avoidable “Swing for the fences”
  133. 133. 134134 If you don’t smile when you read it, do it again Avoidable Tablets are the Apple Newton of 2003.
  134. 134. 135135 If you don’t grimace when you read it, do it again Avoidable Tablets are the stupidest idea ever.
  135. 135. 136136 This isn’t trolling. It’s not writing angry. It’s making a statement. Avoidable
  136. 136. 137137 Disaster 20: Creating a checklist
  137. 137. 138138 before it spreads too far. We have to stop it 1.  Write 400 words 2. Use the key phrase 10 times 3. Make the headline 70 characters 4. Use one image 5. Use one list 6. Write happy! 7. Smile! Be creative!
  138. 138. 139139 Kind of stupid, really. Classification: Bad 1.  Write 400 words 2. Use the key phrase 10 times 3. Make the headline 70 characters 4. Use one image 5. Use one list 6. Write happy! 7. Smile! Be creative!
  139. 139. 140140 You need something. Mitigate 1. When you’re done, read it backwards 2. Make sure at least 1 colleague reads it 3. Wait 1 hour. Reread 4. Publish
  140. 140. 141141 Make repeatable stuff into a checklist. Mitigate 1. When you’re done, read it backwards 2. Make sure at least 1 colleague reads it 3. Wait 1 hour. Reread 4. Publish
  141. 141. 142142 Disaster 21: Going for perfect
  142. 142. 143143 is waiting for the ‘perfect’ topic Everything I’ve never written
  143. 143. 144144 is waiting for the ‘perfect’ story Everything I’ve never written
  144. 144. 145145 is waiting for the ‘perfect’ idea Everything I’ve never written
  145. 145. 146146 Get out there and write
  146. 146. 147 Created by Ian Lurie, CEO & Founder of Portent, Inc. Find him @portentint or www.slideshare.net/wrttnwrd Find his company at www.portent.com Q&A time!!! portent.co/20copy
  147. 147. 148148 Other presentations by Ian
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