SYBAN Definitions Violence: is any act that causes injury or harm, intimidates or causes fear, and demeans or humiliates a person.
SYBAN Definitions Gender-based Violence: violence involving men and women, in which the woman/female is usually the victim and which arises from unequal power relationships between men and women. <ILO South East Asia & Pacific Multidisciplinary Advisory Team, 1998> In other words, its violence committed in an intimate relationship.
SYBAN Forms of Gender-based Violence - Physical. Acts that include bodily harm. Beating, kicking, punching, burning, arm-twisting, arm twisting, etc. Note: In over 95% of all domestic abuse violence, the man is the batterer/perpetrator.
SYBAN Forms of Gender-based Violence Psychological: Refers to words or actions that destroy or harm a woman’s belief in herself. What it does is demean or disempower a woman; undermining her mental or emotional well-being. Humiliating remarks, public ridicule, intimidation, threats, forced imprisonment, isolation, instilling fear, stalking, “always checking up,” forced to witness injurly to pet, unfounded accusations, silent treatment.
SYBAN Forms of Gender-based Violence Economic: withdrawal of financial support, maintaining total control of family finances, running up bills for which the victim is responsible for payment, forbidding employment/occupation. Sexual: forcing the victim to do indecent acts, forced prostitution, withholding sex.
SYBAN Forms of Gender-based Violence Treating the woman as a sexual object Forcing the woman to watch obscene/indecent shows NOTE: Whether the abuse is physical, psychological, sexual, or economic, the heart of the problem is always an imbalance of power. The abuser learns that coercion works! That violence could give him easy results.
SYBAN The Process of Abuse Binding – Describes the phase when the relationship is new and loving. Enduring – In the enduring phase, women tolerate the abuse because of the positive aspects of the relationship or because they feel somewhat responsible for the abuse. Disengaging - The disengaging period involves the woman’s recognition of her situation as being abusive and the understanding that she does not deserve such abuse. A turning point may be reached when the woman realizes the danger or the consequences of the abuse to her health and to her children. Recovery - After a time of readjustment, and successfully overcoming the many barriers that could trap her in the abusive relationship, the woman may enter a phase of recovery in which she remains separated from the abuser. An important point for health care professionals to realize is that, from the womans perspective, the abuse was just one aspect of a whole relationship that may still have some positive elements. Source: Model developed by Landenburger (1989)
SYBAN Why Women Stay in an Abusive Relationship? The man might change for the better She still loves the man despite everything She is doing it for the children (so as not to have a broken family) She cannot support the children by herself She is afraid of what the husband might do to her. The husband might take the children She “probably deserves the beating” <Women’s Legal Bureau>
SYBAN Barriers to Leaving a Violent Partner Gender Roles and lack of Family Support Some women feel obligated to stay in a relationship, even if it is abusive. Women are often expected to stay in a marriage, and they may consider themselves a failure if they leave their husband. They may assume that violence is just part of life and marriage. Concern for Her Own Safety Leaving a violent relationship can be more dangerous for the woman than staying. After leaving a relationship, women are more at risk of stalking, murder and attempted murder (Campbell 2003). Women survivors are experts: they know whether & when it is safe for them to leave. Concern for Her Children’s Well Being In many cases, women may fear for their children’s safety if they decide to leave a relationship. Men are often the financial providers for their families, and women may feel that they simply cannot support their children on their own.
SYBAN Barriers to Leaving a Violent Partner Financial Concerns Men often are the primary earner in their families, and women may not have developed the skills or the opportunities to support themselves financially. If women earn income, husbands often control the couple’s finances and assets. In some places, legislation ensures child support following divorce; in other places, such laws do not exist or are not enforced. Without access to income, women’s options for leaving a relationship are often limited depending on available support services. Lack of Assistance or Services Even if a woman feels ready to leave a violent relationship, she may not find support (family, friends) or services (e.g. shelters) to help implement this decision. Contradictory feelings Often women have loved their abusive partner, and they may want to be with him, holding out hope that he will change. Providers should be careful not to judge the woman for this decision. Source: adapted WHO (2005): TEACH VIP, injury prevention and control curriculum.
Exercise: Work Place Case - Why do Women StaySYBAN in Abusive Relationships? Please think of a situation at your work place. Your chief/boss alternatively praises you for your work and promises to raise your salary – and then fiercely criticizes you. He/she embarrasses you at staff meetings in front of your colleagues, but says after the meeting that he/she meant no harm to you. You shouldn’t be so sensitive. He/she also bad-mouths you behind your back – but expects one hundred percent loyalty from you. Sometimes he/she is very nice and invites all colleagues for a coffee or a glass of wine after work is finished. Your work is interesting and you actually like it. You certainly do not want to loose your job because you are over 40 and it would not be easy to find another job in this area of expertise with the same salary. Furthermore you have to care for your children and to pay for a loan for your car. Source:WAVE-Network (Women against Violence Europe). (2000): Training and Awareness-Raising for Professionals. (http://www.wave-network.org/images/doku/manual.pdf)
SYBAN Linkages between HIV/AIDS & GBV A global review of 30,000 published and unpublished articles and UN studies shows that GBV and childhood sexual abuse (CSA) increases the risk of HIV infection. The Global AIDS Alliance explains why (selection): Violence against women is associated with an increased risk of acquiring sexually transmitted infections, a risk factor of HIV. Violent sexual assault can cause trauma to the vaginal wall that allows easier access to HIV. Fear of violence prevents women from negotiating safe sex. Fear of violence prevents women from seeking voluntary counseling and testing for HIV, returning for their test results, or getting treatment if they are HIV positive or services to prevent mother-to-child HIV transmission.
SYBAN Barriers to Leaving: Situational… Economic dependence Fear of greater physical danger/ suffering worse Fear of emotional damage to children Fear of losing custody of children Lack of alternative housing and/or job skills Social isolation “Acceptable violence” Ties to the community, her home, belongings Family pressure
SYBAN Barriers to Leaving: Emotional… Insecurity. Afraid she can’t cope Pity/ Fears he might commit suicide Denial. “It’s really not that bad.” Love. Especially during the “Honeymoon stage”. Shame Unfounded hopefulness. “Things will get better” Learned helplessness. Demolished self-esteem
SYBAN Barriers to Leaving: Personal Beliefs Parenting. Needing a partner to raise kids. Religious pressure. To keep family together no matter what. Duty. I swore to stay married until death do us part. Belief that marriage is forever Responsibility. It’s up to her to work things out and save the relationship.
SYBAN Profile of Batterers Believe that violence could give them easy results Insecure. Extremely jealous and possessive Emotionally dependent on their wives Extenalize blame for their actions Have poor impulse control
SYBAN Profile of Batterers (cont) Low self-esteem. Poor self image Engage in internalization of traditional male roles (being the head) Cannot translate their feelings into words, so they act it out. Deny that they are violent.
SYBAN Profile of Battered Women They believe that violence done to them was their fault. They fear for their lives as well as the lives of their children They have irrational belief that the abuser is omnipotent They are unable to place the responsibility for the violence elsewhere
SYBAN Effects of Violence Against Women: Social/Economic Lost working hours for the abused and their abusers Pressure on health care system and other social services Income loss for the abused breadwinner Detrimental effects on school performance of abused children Long term consequences of abuse. (intergenerational transmission) Violation of human rights and policy of state. Deters potential contribution to national development. Economic costs on the victims like home displacement, legal costs, medical costs.
SYBAN Effects of Violence Against Women:Mental/Emotional Fears, nervousness Sleeping disorders (nightmares, insomnia) Depression, nervous breakdown, suicidal attempts (tulala, nasisiraan ng bait) Shame, guilt, self-blaming, loss of self-esteem and confidence Relationship among family members is affected, especially the victim of abuse.
SYBAN Violence Wheel Power & Control Wheel Source: Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, Duluth.
SYBAN Cycle of Abuse -Tension building. Tension is increased. Breakdown of communication Victim becomes fearful and feels the need to pacify the abuser. -Incident. Verbal, physical, threats, blaming. -Reconciliation. Abuser apologizes, gives excuses Blames victim Says it wasnt as bad as the victim claims -CalmIncident is forgotten (“Honeymoon” phase)
Psychological Stages of BatteredSYBAN Women Denial. The victim refuses to admit… she may call each incident an “Accident”. Guilt. She new acknowledges there’s a problem, but considers herself responsible for it. Enlightenment. She no longer assumes responsibility for her husband’s abusive behavior/treatment. She recognizes that she does not deserve to be beaten. Responsibility. Accepts that her husband will not and cannot stop his violent behavior. The battered woman decides she will no longer submit to it and starts a new life.
SYBAN How to Empower Victims of Violence i Reinforce the victim’s self-esteem for her psychological healing. Identify positive traits and coping mechanisms that she has been using. Consider the following: GENESIS 2:18. Happy and complementary II PETER 3:7. Husbands should assign honor to their wives. MATTHEW 28 Jesus dignified women by allowing them to be the first eyewitnesses of His resurrection. PROVER 31. Picture of the ‘Capable Wife’
SYBAN How to Empower Victims of Violence B. If possible, make her aware of the available support systems. (NGOs etc.) C. Facilitate the opportunity and ability of the victim to independently regain control over her life.
SYBAN How to Empower Victims of Violence D. Encourage her to join religious groups for social support. E. Women, especially the abused, should be educated about their rights and be taught to speak up if abused.
SYBAN How to Empower Victims of Violence F. Be aware that during the ‘honeymoon’ stage, the victims may not be willing to discuss the abuse. Inform and describe to them about the cycle of abuse. There’s also a tendency that after each turn of a cycle, the violence can increase in frequency and severity G. The victims should be given strategies for their own safety and that of their children’s such as avoiding confrontations in rooms where there is only one exit or rooms containing many potential weapons.