SxSW 2011 Sexual Survival For Geeks

HAVE A PLAN
The SXSW SIS test: Sociability, Icebreakers, Shared Interests.
How will you deal with sexual opportunity? Friends, one night only, bootycall mate, dating?
Be clear about what you want.
Be cool with your roommates.
Decide what you'll share with potential lovers.
Make rules about what you will and won't do, and stick to them.

GEEK FLIRTING
Know gender sexual stereotypes in geek scenes. Learn geek sex communication nuances.
Prep conversation topics, make a self-check physicality system.
Pick targets.
Stick to positive communication.
Don't take it too personally or expect anything.
Decide if it's tonight, tomorrow or never. Plan exit strategies.

HOOKING UP
How to know they want you.
Alcohol, drugs and sex: "too drunk" and risk assessment.
How consent works (know how to say yes or no).
Decide your SXSW sexual rules, and do your best to follow them.
Negotiating sex: sex acts to expect.
Safer sex tips.
Make your post-sex intention clear.

THE NEXT DAY
Zero out your expectations.
Be neutral, but don't ignore - or PDA.
If you made a mistake or were lied to, make a plan. Don't make them a Foursquare location.
Don't brag, or fuck their friends or coworkers.
If you want to see them again, invite them to something you are already doing.
Stay on track with SXSW.

SOCIAL MEDIA SXSEX
Don't @ reply about last night's hot sex.
Don't expect reciprocity, or work opportunities.
Message a follow-up; cement friendly impermanence or build communication.
To pursue, don't let 2 days go by.
Avoid confrontational communication channels.
(Do your best to) get their consent before tagging photos.

Find this presentation, Austin sex resources, geek flirting tips, safer sex charts, and explicit SXSW erotica at thetotalflirt.com/ SXSEXY
Get a Geek Sexual Survival discount at Babeland.com for 10% of all orders with the code VIOLETBLUE
Find handpicked geek sex gear at Babeland.com/violetblue
Find more Violet Blue and all things sex and tech at tinynibbles.com and @violetblue
Special thanks: Babeland.com , illustrator @MartinWhitmore , author @AlisonTyler , SFSI.org , my superb PA Juliette Stray, SXSW support staff and, always, @dotBen .

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SxSW 2011 Sexual Survival For Geeks

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SxSW 2011 Sexual Survival For Geeks Presentation Transcript