Emotional Affairs and Marriage - Why Emotional Affairs Are So Dangerous to a Marriage
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Emotional Affairs and Marriage - Why Emotional Affairs Are So Dangerous to a Marriage

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One of the most damaging occurrences that can take place in one’s marriage is an emotional affair. It is a tricky topic and can be confusing to many as to whether or not it really is “cheating”. ...

One of the most damaging occurrences that can take place in one’s marriage is an emotional affair. It is a tricky topic and can be confusing to many as to whether or not it really is “cheating”. Let’s take a look today at just how emotional affairs and marriage do not mix.

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Emotional Affairs and Marriage - Why Emotional Affairs Are So Dangerous to a Marriage Presentation Transcript

  • 1. Emotional Affairs and Marriage - Why Emotional Affairs Are So Dangerous to a Marriage http://www.saving-relationships.comOne of the most damaging occurrences that can take place in one’s marriageis an emotional affair. It is a tricky topic and can be confusing to many as towhether or not it really is “cheating”. Let’s take a look today at just howemotional affairs and marriage do not mix.
  • 2. It is not uncommon for your spouse to have a friend of the opposite sex with whomthey share a close bond. Often your spouse may have had this friend before you andthey met. You may not particularly like the idea, because of the potential of it leadingto something more, but you may or may not have accepted it.
  • 3. It is not uncommon for your spouse to have a friend of the opposite sex with whomthey share a close bond. Often your spouse may have had this friend before you andthey met. You may not particularly like the idea, because of the potential of it leadingto something more, but you may or may not have accepted it.But perhaps your spouse has developed this type of relationship with someone sinceyou were married. A co-worker or someone they see at the gym regularly. In today’sday and age with technology, you find they spend a great deal of time chatting ortexting with this person. You may be finding yourself having thoughts you may notnormally have about your spouse. Indeed, you may be having doubts as to what theirintentions are for this relationship.
  • 4. It is not uncommon for your spouse to have a friend of the opposite sex with whomthey share a close bond. Often your spouse may have had this friend before you andthey met. You may not particularly like the idea, because of the potential of it leadingto something more, but you may or may not have accepted it.But perhaps your spouse has developed this type of relationship with someone sinceyou were married. A co-worker or someone they see at the gym regularly. In today’sday and age with technology, you find they spend a great deal of time chatting ortexting with this person. You may be finding yourself having thoughts you may notnormally have about your spouse. Indeed, you may be having doubts as to what theirintentions are for this relationship.If you find yourself in this situation, you may be experiencing a common, and normal,reaction and asking yourself, “why is he or she not pulling closer to me?” Or perhapsyou are wondering, “Is talking all that they are doing?”
  • 5. The reason you are feeling this way is that your spouse is expending emotional energywith a person that isn’t you. They are building an intimate connection with a personoutside of your relationship, and naturally you feel like that connection should be builtwith you. They may not yet have a physical relationship, but if your spouse has builtan intimate connection with this person, then more than likely they are currentlyhaving an emotional affair.
  • 6. The reason you are feeling this way is that your spouse is expending emotional energywith a person that isn’t you. They are building an intimate connection with a personoutside of your relationship, and naturally you feel like that connection should be builtwith you. They may not yet have a physical relationship, but if your spouse has builtan intimate connection with this person, then more than likely they are currentlyhaving an emotional affair.The Damage Emotional Affairs Cause to a MarriageWhen an emotional affair occurs between your spouse and someone else, theintimacy that exists between you and them starts to erode. The affection that shouldbe directed to you is instead directed to their friend. They may be sharing theirdeepest and innermost feelings, and this forms a strong emotional connection.
  • 7. This also means they are probably not sharing these things with you, the person thatthey have pledged their life to. This can cause the foundation of your marriage tobecome damaged. Even if the relationship has not become physical, it is indeed a formof cheating.
  • 8. This also means they are probably not sharing these things with you, the person thatthey have pledged their life to. This can cause the foundation of your marriage tobecome damaged. Even if the relationship has not become physical, it is indeed a formof cheating.Often times, couples will argue extensively over whether or not this relationship isappropriate or is indeed cheating. If find yourself in this situation, a commontrademark of an emotional relationship is a lack of openness or transparency. Do theyhide their screen when they chat online? Do they only talk or chat on the phone inprivate? These are telltale signs of an inappropriate emotional relationship.
  • 9. Getting the Emotional Connection Back Where it BelongsSo what do you do to get your spouse to turn their attention back to you and not tosomeone else? To indeed intercept things before they do indeed turn physical. First,your spouse needs to own up to the fact that they are in fact involved in aninappropriate emotional relationship with a member of the opposite sex outside ofyour marriage. They may not even realize it has crossed a boundary, but the two ofyou need to discuss it open and honestly.
  • 10. 1. Rebuilding Your Own Emotional ConnectionTo rebuild your own emotional connection, you need to first do an analysis of your relationship with your spouse. Has there been a breakdown in communication between the two of you? Are there signs of neglect to one another? When is the last time that you said something to each other that made you or them feel special? Whatever the answers are, it is time to put forth the effort to rebuild your emotional bond.
  • 11. 2. Assess All of Your CommunicationThere are two types of communication that exist in a relationship: verbal and nonverbal. In order to have a full and completely intimate relationship, you need to haveboth.Verbal communication is easy…you talk to each other in a supportive and positivemanner. Non-verbal is spending time together. It’s those little things you do whenyou are together, such as holding hands, touching each other, special looks sharedtogether.
  • 12. 2. Assess All of Your CommunicationThere are two types of communication that exist in a relationship: verbal and nonverbal. In order to have a full and completely intimate relationship, you need to haveboth.Verbal communication is easy…you talk to each other in a supportive and positivemanner. Non-verbal is spending time together. It’s those little things you do whenyou are together, such as holding hands, touching each other, special looks sharedtogether.Make a commitment to strengthen both types of communication with each other. In most cases, it is simply a matter of setting aside more time for each other. Make time each night to spend time together instead of watching TV in separate rooms. Set a weekly date night. Go grocery shopping together.
  • 13. 3. Be PersistentCommunication tends to take time to break down, very much like erosion.Conversely, you may find that it takes time for your communication with each otherto improve. Be persistent and stay the course. Your marriage and relationship couldbe at stake.
  • 14. 3. Be PersistentCommunication tends to take time to break down, very much like erosion.Conversely, you may find that it takes time for your communication with each otherto improve. Be persistent and stay the course. Your marriage and relationship couldbe at stake.You will probably find that you need to do things differently. Perhaps in the morning, instead of just grunting good morning without looking up from your laptop, get up and give your spouse a hug to say good morning. Look them in the eye and start the day off on a positive note.Changes in habits that have developed over time can be difficult and will often feel awkward, but you will find that by staying persistent and determined, you and your spouse will begin to develop that emotional bound that you shared when the two of you took your vows in the first place.
  • 15. These are just a few quick suggestions to help you through emotional affairs andmarriage. Whether you are experiencing a cheating spouse or are afraid that it couldoccur, to restore the trust and save your marriage from divorce I strongly recommendfor you to download the 7-Part Survive an Affair course from Dr. Frank Gunzburg. Clickhere now for instant access. Taylor Ranidae is passionate about love and relationships and writes articles focusing on helping people save their relationships and marriages. Her articles are a must read for anyone who is looking to either salvage or further enhance their relationship.