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Be Real Workbook


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This is the preview of the Being Real Seminar workbook.

This is the preview of the Being Real Seminar workbook.

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  • 1. Welcome! BigPicture Youth Ministry Training Seminar Jesus entered into creation at a certain time, in a certain culture as God incarnate. Being real with us has always been a priority to God in re- lationship with us. As we endeavor to join God in this mission we must read the pulse of our cul- ture. This is the landscape of where we enter into the lives of teens. Andrew Root in his book, Revisiting Rela- tional Youth Ministry points us in the right direction when he says, “Relational ministries should avoid I’m the temptation to use relationships to influence adolescents and instead see the Real mandate of the incarnation as the call to shared solidarity in common humanity” ABOUT BIGPICTURE TRAINING BIGPICTURE training works hard to put material into your hands that will help you be more effective in your youth ministry and church. Why do we start w the BIG Picture? ith We believe the Big Picture is the unfold- ing story of God and God’s people. It is our Copyright © 2009 by BigPicture Youth goal to encourage BOTH the youthworker Ministry Training. All Rights Reserved and the student to find their places of be- longing in that story. BIGPICTURE training Designed by Being Real exists to inspire, motivate and equip the lo- Tim Milburn | timagedesign cal church for effective youth ministry. Published in association with Nazarene Youth International, Lenexa, Kansas. BIGPICTURE training is a nationwide orga- nization with trainers all over the United Unless otherwise indicated, all Scrip- States and Canada. Our team has all the ture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version. NIV. tools necessary to provide you with a great Copyright © 1973, 1984 by International training event. Bring BIGPICTURE training Bible Society. Used by permission of to your church or denominational event. Zondervan. All rights reserved. We’ll tailor our training to whatever size crowd you can gather. For more information about BigPicture Youth Ministry Training visit
  • 2. Incarnation Philippians 2:5-11 [NIV] In order to understand what it means to “be real” in our Your attitude should be the lives and ministries, we are going to use the Incarnation as same as that of Christ Jesus: a starting point. Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equal- “Christ entered into a new dimension of existence though the ity with God something to be gateway of human birth and took up his residence among grasped, but made himself (us).” - Frank Gaeblin nothing, taking the very na- ture of a servant, being made Isn’t it ridiculous?! God took the form of a man, a human be- in human likeness. And be- ing, and we can assume he fought with his mom, got splin- ing found in appearance as a ters woodworking with his dad, wrestled with his brothers, man, he humbled himself and and went fishing with his friends. became obedient to death— even death on a cross! There- fore God exalted him to the Jesus was a place-sharer. highest place and gave him the name that is above ev- He entered into the story of our lives to invite us into the ery name, that at the name Story of his Love. of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth “[Dietrich] Bonhoeffer wrote and shouted w his own life that ith and under the earth, and ev- we must become place-sharers; We should enter deeply into ery tongue confess that Jesus each other’s lives for only their sake, knowing that in so doing Christ is Lord, to the glory of God in Christ is present to us both.” God the Father. -Andrew Root, p125 Definition of Incarnation: ____________________________ _________________________________________________ John 1:14 [TM} _________________________________________________ The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood. We saw the And we’re called to go into the world just as God came into glory with our own eyes, the our world through Jesus. We’re called to go out of the four one-of-a-kind glory, like Fa- walls and into the lives of kids, taking God incarnation-ally ther, like Son, Generous inside into their lives. Our job is to let them see the God they can- and out, true from start to fin- not see. Jesus with skin on. That’s what our call is as youth ish. workers. This is an expression of God in us. A natural process flowing out of our relationship with God. Like it says in 2 Cor- inthians 5:13, “His love compels me...” BEING REAL 2
  • 3. Influence 5 Most Influential Sermons 5 Most Influential People 1. 1. “Relational ministry is about helping adolescents be au- 2. 2. thentic human beings as de- termined by the incarnate, 3. 3. human Christ. It joins them 4. 4. in full solidarity w human- ith ity, helping them avoid and 5. 5. oppose that which dehu- manizes, and helping them claim their humanity in wor- We have fallen into the belief that it’s about influence when ship and service of the hu- it’s actually about solidarity. man God.” -Andrew Root, p92 In his book, Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry, Andrew Root explains: “The incarnation, then is not about influence but about solidarity in common humanity, and so relational ministry should be the same. Relational ministries should avoid the temptation to use relationships to influence adolescents and instead see the mandate of the incarnation as the call to shared solidarity in common humanity.” (p92) Here’s what we know... A person is more powerful than an . “Preach the Gospel always... People are more important than . if necessary...use words.” - St. Francis Relationships are an end in . A hundred years from now, it won’t matter what my bank ac- count was, the sort of house I lived in, or the car I drove. But the world may be a different place because I was important in the life of a teen. In reality, they won’t remember a thing you’ve said, what they’lll remember is who you are. BEING REAL 3
  • 4. Inside Culture The culture in the United States has undergone a titanic and irreversible revolution in the last sixty years. In fact, our so- ciety has transitioned faster than any civilization in the his- tory of the world. In 1930 over 70% of America lived in rural areas and about 30% lived in an urban area. 1950: 36% rural, 64% urban 2000: 20% rural, 80% urban/suburban (World Urbanization Prospects: 2007 Revision Population Database) Let’s look at 15 comparisons between pre- World War II (PAST) and the current norm (PRESENT): PAST: Good basic training for . PRESENT: Little basic training for . PAST: Family sharing. PRESENT: Family sharing. PAST: Homogenous system. [def: of the same or a similar kind or nature] PRESENT: Heterogenous system. [def: consisting of dissimilar or diverse ingredients] PAST: role models to observe. PRESENT: role models to observe. BEING REAL 4
  • 5. From Called To Equipped. Treve cc a N a z a re n e U n i ve rs i ty o f fe rs yo u t h e o p p o r t u n i ty to c a r r y o u t G o d ’ s c a l l i n yo u r l i fe by h e l p i n g yo u b e co m e f u l l y e q u i p p e d to s e r ve t h e p re s e nt g e n e rat i o n a n d a ra p i d l y c h a n g i n g wo r l d . T h ro u g h i t s b ro a d c u r r i c u l u m , t h e M a ste r o f A r t s i n Re l i g i o n P ro g ra m o f fe rs st u d y i n c u r re nt t re n d s a n d t h e a p p l i c at i o n o f b i b l i c a l a n d t h e o l o g i c a l st u d i e s to t h e C h r i st i a n p ro c l a m at i o n . S p e c i f i c a l l y d e s i g n e d fo r p e rs o n s a l re a d y a ct i ve i n m i n i st r y, t h i s p ro g ra m p rov i d e s o p p o r t u n i ty fo r d i a l o g u e w i t h o t h e rs i n m i n i st r y. At t h e u n d e rg ra d u ate l eve l , a co m p re h e n s i ve p ro g ra m i n yo u t h m i n i st r y p rov i d e s t h e b a s i s fo r a l i fet i m e o f s e r v i ce to te e n a g e rs . C a l l to d ay to s e e h ow Treve cc a c a n a s s i st yo u to s e r ve yo u r wo r l d . Make the Leap. 333 Murfreesboro Road Nashville, TN 37210 615-248-1320 |
  • 6. THE WORK OF THE PEOPLE VISUAL MEDIA FOR MINISTRY We are a community of artists, storytellers, filmmakers, poets and theologians. Our work is to tell the story we share and to ask poignant questions through film, literature, art and music. We are proud to partner with BigPicture Youth Ministry Training exploring Heroic Faith together. . Receive a free download by using the participant code: bigpicture09 Get $75 off the Annual Unlimited Download Subscription using the code: bptrainers09 Please check us out at
  • 7. Inside Culture PAST: informal inter-generational associations. PRESENT: inter-generational associations. PAST: Peer groups . PRESENT: Peer groups more . PAST: emphasis on formal education. PRESENT: emphasis on formal education. PAST: level of information. PRESENT: of information. PAST: technology. PRESENT: technology. BEING REAL 7
  • 8. Inside Culture PAST: Tasks were . PRESENT: No tasks. PAST: families (many children). PRESENT: families. PAST: Extended families . PRESENT: Extended families . PAST: broken homes. PRESENT: broken homes. PAST: Work on home. PRESENT: Work from home. PAST: anonymity. PRESENT: anonymity. BEING REAL 8
  • 9. Where are we? We strongly believe that there are Four Critical Factors that sit at the root of the societal morass we find ourselves in: Loss of networks. Sometimes I feel like this... Loss of meaningful roles. Loss of on-the-job training for life. » I do not know what the future Loss of parenting resources. holds for me, but I know it’s gon- na hurt...and it’s gonna hurt real The Six S’s bad. S » A job worth doing is a job worth giving to someone other than S me. S » God grant me the seren- ity to accept the things I cannot S change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom S to know that I really can’t do ei- ther. S » My inner child is dead and bur- This is the generation we must seek to be place-sharers in. The ied somewhere in my backyard. world may not be how we like it or how we’re used to, but it is the world we’re in. to sign up: 1.800.7.FAMINE or sponsor a child today for more information: 1.866.247.9399 or powered by: Nazarene Compassionate BEING REAL Ministries 9
  • 10. 3 Big Rocks Stephen Covey’s Big Rocks Demonstration Covey had a table set up upon which there was an empty glass jar and three other jars: one containing large rocks, one containing small pebbles, and the last one containing sand. He then stated that the big rocks represented our most im- portant activities. The pebbles represented our less mean- ingful activities and the sand represented the activities that waste the most time. He stated that most of us focus our attention on the small things in life and so he dumped the pebbles into the jar. He then asked a person to come up to the stand and fill the empty glass container with all three materials. The person that came up put the pebbles into the jar first and then the sand and tried unsuccessfully to put the large rocks in the glass jar, but they would not fit. After some general guidance from Covey and a fresh set of supplies, the person put the big rocks into the empty jar first and then the pebbles and finally the sand and all three materials fit inside the jar. In fact, in another similar demon- stration, the facilitator took it another step and put a jar of water into the container after the sand was poured. What Does This Demonstration Mean? This demonstration provides a powerful metaphor with each item representing something in your life. Empty glass jar: Large rocks: Pebbles: Sand: Water: BEING REAL 10
  • 11. REFER A STUDENT ONLINE! CHOOSE IT. FEEL IT. LIVE IT. my life and gave me a perspective life is very evident today. I think the that has served me well across the mentors, and instructors that care years. I am thankful for a church The professors always showed us for the opportunity to seek my need to shape them through schools Heather Hofacre (’03), Justin Smith, Junior Gary Hartke (’84), Director of Development, Be part of a genuine community with accomplished faculty such as Drs. John Hall, Jeanne Serrão, and Bruce Petersen. Their real-world ministry experience makes all the difference! Specialized majors in: 1-866-462-MVNU ADMISSIONS@MVNU.EDU ADMISSIONS.MVNU.EDU
  • 12. HOW FAR AHEAD CAN YOU SEE? You’ve got a lot of options when it comes to higher education. These Nazarene Colleges and Universities will prepare you for the road ahead. Perhaps you need a class, a degree, or just want to sharpen your skills. Dedicated to the Wesleyan tradition, these schools are equipping students with the tools and experience to see farther and go further on their journey through life. Visit each school’s website to learn more about their unique offerings. IN PARTNERSHIP WITH NEON [NAZARENE ENROLLMENT OFFICERS NETWORK]
  • 13. Northwest Nazarene University Great minds. Great hearts. Great futures.
  • 14. Outreach When it comes to outreach: We have to teens, not just love them. We must where they are, find common ground. Principle: We must be in it for the haul. Needy people are intimidated by busy people. “The real task is not to get everything done but to live obediently.” -Max Lucado “Relational evangelism is an intentional way of living. It is linked w being a mission- ith ary more than anything else. In other words, we see ours- leves as missionaries to our own culture. (It is the idea behind the early Christian hymn recorded in Philippi- ans 2:5-11)” -Mike Kipp/Kenny Wade from Being Real, p54 Who’s on your mind? BEING REAL 15
  • 15. Discipleship Outreach leads us directly to discipleship. In fact, Jesus saw every person as a potential disciple. It all started with outreach! How do we take a person who’s not in- terested in God at all and watch them be transformed into a true follower of God? M John 15:5 [NIV] ”I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he w bear ill M much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” M Consider the following opportunities for discipleship to occur in your everyday life: Develop a stronger with God each day. “...helping adolescents come to faith and move into dis- Clear out some time for . cipleship is not about a pro- gram of conversion, it is nev- Be . er about the closing the deal or moving them forward; it is Grow, study, pray . not about helping them “get it” (whatever “it” might be). Go and take someone It is only, most beautifully in the course of ministry/mission. and powerfully, about being together, sharing life before Trust for the results. God and understanding that in our shared connectionof common humanity Christ is present.” -Andrew Root, p116-117 BEING REAL 16
  • 16. Family Friendly When it comes to being “family friendly” in our minis- try, we must realize: It’s easy to feel because we have a lot to do already. We are often by parents “A relational youth ministry and family issues because we don’t feel trained, etc. should not only connect an adolescent w ith a place- Parents and families are our allies and we need to sharer but also help the see teenagers within the place-sharer be a resource of their families. to the adolescent’s family.” -Andrew Root, p209 The National Study of Youth and Religion states that generally students end up in a similar state in their re- lationship with Christ that their parents did. BEING REAL 17
  • 17. Assets 40 Developmental Assets® for Adolescents (ages 12-18) Search Institute® has identified the following building blocks of healthy development—known as Developmental Assets®—that help young people grow up healthy, caring, and responsible. Support 1. Family support—Family life provides high levels of love and support. 2. Positive family communication—Young person and her or his parent(s) communicate positively, and young person is willing to seek advice and counsel from parents. 3. Other adult relationships—Young person receives support from three or more nonparent adults. 4. Caring neighborhood—Young person experiences caring neighbors. FAMILY 5. Caring school climate—School provides a caring, encouraging environment. FRIENDLY 6. Parent involvement in schooling—Parent(s) are actively involved in helping young person succeed in school. QUESTIONS Empowerment 7. Community values youth—Young person perceives that adults in the community value youth. 8. Youth as resources—Young people are given useful roles in the community. Q: Is our youth min- External Assets 9. Service to others—Young person serves in the community one hour or more per week. 10. Safety—Young person feels safe at home, school, and in the neighborhood. istry supporting Boundaries & 11. Family boundaries—Family has clear rules and consequences and monitors the young person’s whereabouts. and encouraging Expectations 12. School Boundaries—School provides clear rules and consequences. healthy family re- 13. Neighborhood boundaries—Neighbors take responsibility for monitoring young people’s behavior. lationships or war- 14. Adult role models—Parent(s) and other adults model positive, responsible behavior. 15. Positive peer influence—Young person’s best friends model responsible behavior. ring against them? 16. High expectations—Both parent(s) and teachers encourage the young person to do well. Constructive 17. Creative activities—Young person spends three or more hours per week in lessons or practice in music, Use of Time theater, or other arts. Q: What can I do 18. Youth programs—Young person spends three or more hours per week in sports, clubs, or organizations to build bridges at school and/or in the community. 19. Religious community—Young person spends one or more hours per week in activities in a religious institution. of friendship and 20. Time at home—Young person is out with friends “with nothing special to do” two or fewer nights per week. communication with the whole fam- ily and not just the Commitment 21. Achievement Motivation—Young person is motivated to do well in school. to Learning 22. School Engagement—Young person is actively engaged in learning. student? 23. Homework—Young person reports doing at least one hour of homework every school day. 24. Bonding to school—Young person cares about her or his school. 25. Reading for Pleasure—Young person reads for pleasure three or more hours per week. Q: How can we Positive 26. Caring—Young person places high value on helping other people. Values more effectively 27. Equality and social justice—Young person places high value on promoting equality and reducing hunger and poverty. 28. Integrity—Young person acts on convictions and stands up for her or his beliefs. include parents 29. Honesty—Young person “tells the truth even when it is not easy.” and families in our Internal Assets 30. Responsibility—Young person accepts and takes personal responsibility. 31. Restraint—Young person believes it is important not to be sexually active or to use alcohol or other drugs. youth ministries? Social 32. Planning and decision making—Young person knows how to plan ahead and make choices. Competencies 33. Interpersonal Competence—Young person has empathy, sensitivity, and friendship skills. 34. Cultural Competence—Young person has knowledge of and comfort with people of different cultural/racial/ethnic backgrounds. 35. Resistance skills—Young person can resist negative peer pressure and dangerous situations. 36. Peaceful conflict resolution—Young person seeks to resolve conflict nonviolently. Positive 37. Personal power—Young person feels he or she has control over “things that happen to me.” Identity 38. Self-esteem—Young person reports having a high self-esteem. 39. Sense of purpose—Young person reports that “my life has a purpose.” 40. Positive view of personal future—Young person is optimistic about her or his personal future. This page may be reproduced for educational, noncommercial uses only. Copyright © 1997, 2006 by Search Institute, 615 First Avenue N.E., Suite 125, Minneapolis, MN 55413; 800-888-7828; All Rights Reserved. The following are registered trademarks of Search Institute: Search Institute®, Developmental Assets® and Healthy Communities • Healthy Youth®. BEING REAL 18
  • 18. Youth Ministries around the world need your support! You can log onto and sponsor a project! Building materials Printed Materials Translation Costs Supplies Event Assistance Equipment Nazarene Youth International Body of Christ Group Exercise Have a volunteer read aloud 1 Cor. 12:12-30, then tell the group they’re going to accomplish a task to illustrate this passage. Form teams of six. Have each of the team members become one of the following body parts: 1. Eyes--can’t use arms or talk but can whisper to Mouth and listen to Ears. 2. Ears--can’t use arms or talk but can whisper to Mouth and Eyes. 3. Mouth--can’t use arms or eyes but can repeat only what Eyes and Ears whisper to do. 4. Right Arm--can use right arm only on commands from Mouth. 5. Left Arm--can use left arm only on commands from Mouth. 6. Legs--on hands and knees between Mouth’s legs and moves only on Mouth’s commands NOTE: “Mouth#3” and “Legs#6” role maybe uncomfortable with opposite gender. Maybe best to pair up same gender here. Have Right Arm, Ears, and Left Arm lock arms. Tell Mouth to stand behind Ears and hang onto Ears’s waist. Blindfold everyone except Eyes. Place a candy bar on the floor about 15 feet away from the “Body.” Have the group perform the task of picking up and unwrapping the candy bar, then feeding the candy bar to the Mouth. Each person must fulfill his or her assigned role to accomplish this task. Applaud the group’s efforts once it has completed the task. Discuss how each body part felt during the experi- ence. Read aloud 1 Cor. 12:12-30 again and discuss how each part of the body is important to the success of the body as a whole. Stay in your Body of Christ groups for discussion. BEING REAL 19
  • 19. Practices OUTREACH 1. Big Pack Attacks * Wednesday night, load up in cars. WHAT OTHER * Go and kidnap people who are new or you haven’t seen in awhile, IDEAS COME end up at a pizza place for bread sticks and coke. You call the par- ents and warn them that you’re coming. Charge $1 to cover the TO MIND? pizza cost. (Alternative: Kidnap teens under and end up at the local rescue mission to serve.) 2. Give out a coupon for a coke after school, they bring a friend with them. That way you meet their friends. 3. Go once a week for a month to where the kids in your commu- nity hang out and just listen and observe. Pray while you’re there, ask God to give you ideas to reach them. DISCIPLESHIP 1. Prayer Tour (Progressive Prayer Day) * highest place, mountain-top prayer, local Monastery for a guided day prayer retreat. * nice garden, not my will but yours prayer * school, intercessory prayer for friends, volunteer with your teens in a local food bank. * dark place, closet prayers * church, altar praying for your spiritual walk * OR mission prayer tour, school prayer tour 2. On-site Bible Study * living water, stream * death, cemetery * Jesus Sea of Galilee, lake * sin, jail 3. Schedule breakfast once a week with a teen. -invite a guest to converse with your small group 4. Equip and Train other youth workers and teens to do what you do. FAMILY FRIENDLY 1. Plan a family picnic on a Sunday after church, play games. 2. Make hospital calls on family members of teenagers. 3. Remember birthdays and parents’ anniversaries. 4. Have a parent appreciation day during Sunday School or do three parent Sunday School class. 5. Invite Parents and Family to Monthly Youth Ministry Team Lunch- es. 6. Invite Grandparents to explore serving on the youth ministry team. BEING REAL 20
  • 20. Affirm Incarnation didn’t start with us. Remember your five most influen- tial people. Christ is trying to get our attention. We’re too involved in life and ministry. Christ is yelling “I love you. Look up here!” Look, you’re busy doing a million things, and you don’t have time to what you really want to do. You spend your own money on youth group because you don’t have a youth budget. You’re tired and sometimes at the end of your rope. But you’re the real he- 2 Timothy 1:6 [NIV] roes. If we’ve learned anything along the journey, we’ve learned “For this reason I remind you to that God would say to you now, “With Me, you’re enough!” You fan into flame the gift of God, might feel inadequate but with Christ’s help, all things are pos- which is in you through the lay- sible. Christ in you is more than enough. ing on of my hands.” Remember, youth ministry is a . You’re not called to be successful, you’re called to be faithful. And if you’ll just hang in there, God will bring the harvest. It’s not about doing ; it’s about . . . We hope you don’t walk away from here today feeling that you’ve got to do more, have more programs. Youth ministry isn’t about being successful, achieving more and more. It’s about being faith- ful. Sticking by the stuff. It’s hard to do but you can stay with it because . . . Something is than nothing. Don’t look at the big churches with 4,000 activities a week. That’s not really youth ministry--that’s more like a high-energy recre- “The beginning of being real ation program. What you’re doing--loving one kid at a time--is is the practice of recognizing youth ministry. In fact, your presence alone makes a huge differ- each person as someone who ence! is created in the image of God. In many ways our relationships You make the . at their best are the image of It’s not about getting paid to hang out with kids. It’s about doing God in me recongizing the something significant that will make a much greater impact on a kid’s life. image of God in you. Dietrich Bonhoeffer implies in his book, Your ministry is a of your walk with Jesus. Life T ogether, that it’s never You can’t give away something that you don’t possess. 2 Timothy just you and me. The way we 1:6 tells us that we are to fan into flame the gift of God which is in relate is always me and you us. And that gift is the spirit of Christ, compassion, love, patience, and Jesus.” gentleness, kindness, self-control, etc. You make the difference. -Mike Kipp/Kenny Wade, p67- Thank you for serving Christ. 68 Remember that one kid God brought to your mind at the begin- ning of the day? The one whose name you wrote down across the picture? Think about him/her right now. What’s God calling you to be for that kid right now? Remember, you are enough with Christ’s help. BEING REAL 21
  • 21. Resources BOOKS + They Like Jesus But Not The Church (Dan Kimball) + God at the Mall (Pete Ward) + Contemplative Youth Ministry (Mark Yaconelli) + Being Real (Mike Kipp & Kenny Wade) + Presence Centered Youth Ministry (Mike King) + Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry (Andrew Root) + HURT (Chap Clark) + Ties That Stress (David Elkind) MEDIA MENU (some of these clips may have been used in today’s seminar) + Video Clip: POP ART JESUS LOOP - + Video Clip: Get Smart - Right Back (1:12) - + Video Clip: Ron Clark Story - A Fighting Chance (1:25) - + Video Clip: STRANGER FILM - + Video Clip: Bible Stories Seldomly Animated “Genealogy of Jesus” - ($2.99) + Video Clip: Arthur and the Invisibles - 10th Birthday (2:56) - + Video Clip: Cheaper by the Dozen - Catching the Frog (1:07) ~ + Video Clip: Astronaut Farmer, The - I Still Believe (1:07) - + Video Clip: People in the City Loop - WEB RESOURCES BEING REAL 22
  • 22. Notes BEING REAL 23
  • 23. Who? BIGPICTURE PEOPLE +Mike Kipp | [Director of BigPicture Training] +Tim Milburn | [Big Picture Design/Information Coordinator] REGIONAL TRAINERS: +Stuart Williams | [Canada Region] +James Smith | [East Central USA Region - Mount Vernon Nazarene University] +Adam Ziegler | [Eastern USA Region - Eastern Nazarene College] +TBA | [North Central USA Region - Mid America Nazarene University] +Kenny Wade | [Northwest USA Region - Northwest Nazarene University] +Blair Spindle | [South Central USA Region - Southern Nazarene University] +Chad Ramage | [Southwest USA Region - Point Loma Nazarene University] +Brooklyn Lindsey | [Southweat USA Region - Trevecca Nazarene University] BEING REAL 24