‘ Nallathu cheithal aatrir aayinum …’ (Even if you cannot do good, refrain from evil at least) – is it enough? The answer is, No .
‘ Cheithakka cheiyamaiyan kedum. ’ ( “ Not doing good results in evil.”)
‘ Ollum vahaiyan aravinai ovathe ..’ Try to help in every little way, whenever & wherever it is possible.
Every time something good happens to you, make sure something good happens to someone else.
Free your mind from prejudices.
Have an open mind. “ Emptied, you hold .”
Be receptive to ideas.
Be quick to listen. Be slow to respond.
Perceptions differ. What is right in your view may not be that .
Don’t jump to conclusions. See the other person’s point of view.
Have a sound sense of proportion .
See the things as they are . See the big as big and the petty as petty .
Wisdom is knowing what to overlook.
Seeing negative is not being negative.
Those who see the negative are as important as those who see the positive. (Plane & parachute)
Think right towards people.
Have a positive attitude towards people. Find qualities in them to like.
Everyone’s, just everyone’s, life is littered with compromises, morally questionable decisions & inconsistent behaviour. Keep this in mind.
“ aethilar kutram pol than kutram ..” People can only be as perfect as you are. Accept differences & limitations.
Judge them less harshly. Don’t be hostile when they slip up in tiny ways.
“ Rudeness is a weak person’s attempt at strength.”
Be considerate, friendly & affable.
Practise courtesy. Say - please.
Tell the truth by all means, but with tact & kindness.
Explain. Do it patiently.
Accommodate the other viewpoints.
Allow criticism. It is often constructive. ‘Idipparai illa emara mannan…’
‘ Roudram pazhahu .’ ( Learn to be angry)
Know what to be angry about.
One cannot be neutral between the right and the wrong. One so neutral is on the side of injustice.
Evil multiplies when good people don’t champion what is right.
“ Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere .”
Not to be angry at injustice is to be dishonest .
But, manage that anger.
Attack the thing rather than the person.
If you must say unpleasant things, say them in a pleasant way.
Sugar-coat your criticisms.
It is easy to say a few mean words in the heat of the moment. Refrain.
Don’t drag out issues from the past.
Don’t make any personality digs or snide remarks.
Avoid being embroiled in a screaming match.
“ You can be young just once. But you can be immature anytime! ”
Resist the temptation to be childish.
Be a grown up. Be mature.
Be liberal in outlook & considerate in action.
Be understanding & forgiving. Refrain from mischief.
“ An eye for an eye will leave the whole world blind .”
‘ Inna seitharai oruthal ….’ Do good to the person who has done you wrong. Let this be his punishment.
Grow up. But retain the child in you .
Be playful. Import fun into all things you do. (“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” – G B Shaw)
Be lively, not half-dead. Be alive to things around.
View the world in wonderment. Be curious.
Discover the joy in simple things & deeds. Relish them.
Dream (but be wakeful). What is life without impossible dreams?
“ Battles are won first in the minds before they are won in the battlefield.” ..
If you don’t control what you think, you can’t control what you d.
If you don’t control what you think,
you can’t control what you do.
Have a winning attitude.
‘ Yes, we can.’
‘ We can make it work.’
‘ We are perfect for this job.’
‘ We are a lean, mean machine.’
‘ I’ll be glad to take responsibility.’
‘ It is a challenge.’
‘ I’ll come up with alternatives.’
‘ We have the opportunity to be the first.’
‘ There’s room for improvement.’
‘ We shall learn something new.’
‘ Let’s try it a few more times.’
No great talent without great willpower
Those who are determined and work to win will win, no matter what the destiny has ordained. ( Tirukkural )
The difficult can be done right away. The impossible will take only a little longer. ( J R D Tata )
There is nothing you cannot be, there is nothing you cannot do, and there is nothing you cannot have. All you have to do is believe in you. (a newspaper advt)
Let no horizon be too large for you to gaze at.
“ In the long run you hit only what you aim at.”
“ It is not failure but low aim which is crime.”
“ Kaana muyal eitha ambinil …” (Aiming at an elephant & failing is more glorious than targetting a rabbit & felling it.)
N ever quit. No one can cheat you out of ultimate success but you.
Life is full of beginnings.
A mere bend in the road is not the end of it.
Have belief in yourself. Never sell yourself short.
There is always some good in every situation. Look out.
Sharpen your awareness to the opportunities that lie around.
You will never know what can be done until you try it.
The secret to success is never to give up .
Failures are but stepping stones to success.
There are no mistakes in life, only lessons.
Every failure is a lesson in learning.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
Failing is not bad. Staying down is.
No failure is final. --------------------------------------- “ Failure is a noun. The only fear it holds for us is in the meaning we give it. Define failure as giving up. Take control of it. ” - David Taylor
‘ Idukkan varungal nahuha!’ Don’t give in.
Tough times don’t last. What comes after them is bound to be good.
“ The harder you fall, the higher you bounce .” – American proverb
Learn to make the best of a situation. Optimism is a duty cast upon you.
Have hope. Things may change in a day, and for the better.
“ No pressure, no diamonds.” (Mary Case)
One who feels bound remains bound.
Invest in yourself. Grow. Keep growing
Only those who dare reach great heights.
Opportunity exists only when you can see it.
Opportunity is no accident. It must be attracted.
Opportunity of a lifetime should be seized within the lifetime of the opportunity.
Don’t be weighed down by knowledge!
You are what you know.
Knowledge is power. But, left unused, it has no power in it.
Little is ever achieved by persons who are bookish.
Indifference and unconcern make a superior & knowledgeable person average.
“ He who has imagination without knowledge has wings but no feet .”
Creativity without knowledge is rudderless. Build up knowledge.
Imagination helps in exploring the unknown. Use imagination to go beyond knowledge.
Reinforce your skills. Constantly update them.
Rich vocabulary helps. Remember 1984 of George Orwell?
A higher order language allows us
- to deal better with processes and things, and
– to convey more, saying less./
Where is the difference between a rut and a grave? Only in the dimensions!
‘ Should I stay with the routine ?’ No! Get out. Don’t be stuck in the present.
‘ When do I act ?’ Act now. Follow it through. Till success .
‘ Should I self-start or ..?’ Be pro-active, not reactive. Don’t wait for prompting.
‘ How can I do more ? ’ Capacity is a state of mind. Do more of what you do, just like that.
‘ How can I do better ? ’ Crave for excellence in whatever you do. You can do better by just willing to do better.
“ One is never too old to learn (something foolish?).”
To read is to grow.
To read is also to lead.
Learn something every day.
Katrilan ayinum ketka.. Listen.
Discussions make you richer.
Grow every day. Overtake yourself.
Practise Kaizen . Make incremental improvements, every day .
“ Cheivana thiruntha chei .”
Aim at perfection . Achieve excellence .
Develop an instinct for quality. It pays.
If it is worth doing, it is worth doing well.
Try to do it right at the very first instance . A work done poorly must be done again.
Do it in time .
“ We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.” ------------------------------------------------------------
Enemy of the country, and the people!
Q: “Desh aur samaj ka dushman kise mante hain?”
A: “Jo samay par apne kartavyon ko pura nahin karte hain.”
Belief & Behaviour
Accept your limitations.
But be aware of your qualities & strengths .
Change your beliefs , and you change your behaviour .
Change your behaviour, and you change your results, and your life itself .
Self-limiting beliefs are learnt behaviours. Anything that is learnt can be unlearnt as well.
List all negative beliefs. Replace them with the positive.
Begin. Take the first step which is the most difficult.
Anything worth doing is worth failing at , until you get it right.
Overcome your anxiety.
Failure is not a crime. All humans are fallible.
It is not terrible to be not perfect.
Negative stress comes from what you tell yourself, like –
‘ I must always succeed’.
‘ I’ve to meet everyone’s expectations of me.’
‘ I’m no good unless I do everything right.
Develop strategies to cope with stress & performance anxiety.
Learn to like yourself.
Make a list of positive things about yourself.
Feel good about who you are & how you feel.
‘ Thoongathey thambi thoongathey.. ’
(Don’t doze off, brother, wake up)
Also, be not a pretender. Be a performer .
Being busy is irrelevant. It is performance that matters.
Slow performance and under-performance are bad enough.
Non-performance takes the cake: it is plain theft .
Annihilate these assumptions:
Inefficiency is normal.
Delays are inbuilt & cannot be cut down.
Performance will not be rewarded.
Only manipulators will get ahead.
We are made this way & things just won’t improve.
Things will get only worse.
Nothing can be done.
“ Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want .”- Dan Stanford
Don’t be risk-averse. Only those who dare reach new heights.
Dare to be different. Discovery follows exploration.
Challenge the givens & the ‘unchangeables’
Be ready: planned destruction may be necessary before planned construction.
Never mind that you didn’t succeed.
“ May you not enjoy the work you do !”
The worst possible curse. That one is, in any language.
Learn to like and enjoy the work.
Any work, just any work, can be made interesting.
There is always a better way of doing things.
Do your work creatively. Import fun into it.
If you see only problems you will have only problems!
“ Every solution contains a problem within it.” syndrome. (Murphy’s Law)
“ Suppose we win?” syndrome.(The story of the one crop nation planning to wage war on the US)
“ If anything can go wrong, it will.” (Sodd’s Law)
A man carrying a baby wanted to weigh the baby in a scale.
“ Our baby weighing machine has gone for repairs. But we can weigh the baby on the general weighing machine,” the sales attendant offered.
“ How will you do that?” asked the man.
“ Simple. We do it all the time. The father first stands on the weighing machine with the baby. Then he stands without the baby.”
“ It won’t work,” said the man, looking disappointed.
“ Well, you see I’m the baby’s uncle, not his father.”
Look at pbms as challenges. Success often presents itself as an alluring challenge.
Most problems are produced, or left unsolved, by half-used minds.
Face pbms with keenness & from a new direction , each time.
Don’t jump to the obvious solution. (‘This is the tallest peak!’ syndrome)
Challenge what is accepted. You will find a whole new world of possibilities uncovered.
Every problem has a lifespan..
Know the stage at which it is .
Recognize the minor hassles from the major ones. Know what to worry about & what to take coolly.
Take one step at a time. Deal with them in small bits.
No knee-jerk reactions. No short-term patches.
The real obstacles are not the pbms themselves, but the wrong approaches to finding the solutions.
Think solution, not problem.
See a solution, where others see a pbm. There is a solution to every problem.
Try to solve, not prolong.
Ascertain the facts.
Have an uncluttered mind. Cut out the extraneous. Identify the core.
Face the issue head on. Take it on without breaking step.
While with major pbm, stay detached.
Intractable? Sleep over it . Let it work its way out.
Cursing a flat tyre does not fix it.
‘ If you can’t go over the hill, go around it. Digging a tunnel is a clear option, if going to the other side is all that necessary.’
The solution often lies in identifying the solvers.
Take help where needed. ‘If something seems far too big, maybe it’s because you’re meant to share the load with someone else.’
Look for solutions where you will find them. (Mullah story)
‘ Gangrene cannot be cured with palliatives .’ (Simon Bolivar)
Face pbms resolutely. Gordian knots may have to be cut.
Extra-ordinary pbms call for extra-ordinary solutions.
Weeding out is necessary for a good crop.
“ Sometimes it is necessary to go a long distance out of the way in order to come back a short distance correctly.”/
Nothing great was ever achieved by sitting still.
Progress has always come from people who said it could be done.
“ I can’t”- are sad words in any language.
Whatever you can dream, you can begin.
Put passion, enthusiasm & zeal into everything you do.
Keep pushing. It’s wiser than sitting aside.
‘ Udyamena hi siddhayanti karyani, na manorathaiha .’
Think your work is important.
The way we think towards our jobs determines how our subordinates think towards their jobs.
Rules are for human beings, not the other way round.
Don’t be rule-bound.
Interpret the rules positively. Let them enable, and not inhibit, you.
Precedents should be guides, not fetters.
Good people follow the rules. But, it is often the unscrupulous who quote the rules.
Breaking norms in order to frame better ones is an option to be explored.
Don’t be in self-doubt .
Feel & act confident. Stand by your convictions.
Be positively assertive, when you are in the right.
Where speech is due, silence may be betrayal.
Insist on your right to be heard & reckoned. But, be accommodative of the other point of view.
“ Don’t say ‘yes’ when you want to say ‘no’ .
Thinking first, action only then.
Act by all means, but only after considering all relevant matters.
Don’t make decisions based on just one or two dimensions. (“Many a fellow in love with a dimple…”)
Don’t act impulsively.
If you have to act, act fast & decisively.
Integrity signifies wholeness
‘ Integrity’ means absence of inner warfare.
It gives extra energy & clarity of thought.
It means –
living up to the best in oneself.
having a developed sense of honour.
having a conscience & listening to it.
having the courage of one’s convictions.
obedience to the unenforceable.
In doing a good deed take it that everything is permitted which is not prohibited. Be performance-oriented.
“ If one desires a change, one must be that change before it can take place .”
Anticipate change. Things can change in a day.
Be alert to the first signs of change.
Feel obligated to effect the change.
Look at opportunities that change represents.
Keep renewing yourself. Don’t allow routines to become chains.
Keep managing the present while managing the change.