8 t SCREEN I MONDAY 4 OCTOBER 2010
AS ENDHIRAN FEVER GRIPS THE COUNTRY — LET’S REMIND
OURSELVES ONCE AGAIN WHY THERE IS WONLY VUN RAJINI!
● When Rajinikanth does ● Rajinikanth kills two kicked one of the corners off. those scars. ● Rajinikanth killed ● Rajinikanth can give pain
push-ups, he isn’t lifting him- stones with one bird. ● Rajinikanth can build a ● Rajinikanth once warned a Spiderman using Baygon to painkillers and headache
self up. He is pushing the ● Rajinikanth killed the Dead snowman out of rain. young girl to be good “or Anti Bug Spray . to Anacin.
earth down. Sea. ● Rajinikanth can watch the else”. The result? Mother ● Rajinikanth puts the ● Rajinikanth knows what
● There is no such thing as ● Rajinikanth gave Mona show 60 Minutes in 20 min- Teresa. ‘laughter’ in manslaughter. women really want.
evolution, it’s just a list of Lisa that smile. utes. ● Rajinikanth electrocuted ● Rajinikanth goes to court ● Time and tide wait for
creatures that Rajinikanth ● Rajinikanth can drown a Iron Man. and sentences the judge. Rajinikanth.
allowed to live. fish. ● Rajinikanth can handle the ● As a child when
● Rajinikanth can divide by ● Rajinikanth once got into a truth. Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he
zero. fight with a VCR player. Now ● Rajinikanth can teach an simply re-scripted the alpha-
● Rajinikanth can judge a it plays DVDs.
RAJINIKANTH HIS EMAIL old dog new tricks. bet.
book by its cover. ● Rajinikanth once ● Rajinikanth grinds his cof- ● Rajinikanth doesn’t need a
● Rajinikanth can delete the ordered a plate of idli KNOWS WHICH ID IS GMAIL@ fee with his teeth and boils visa to travel abroad, he just
Recycle Bin. CAME FIRST, the water with his own rage. jumps from the tallest build-
● Rajinikanth can slam a RAJINIKANTH. ● The last time Rajinikanth ing in Chennai and holds
revolving door. THE CHICKEN COM killed someone, he slapped himself in the air while the
● Rajinikanth once kicked a OR THE EGG himself to do it. The other earth rotates.
horse in the chin. Its descen- guy just disintegrated. ● Rajinikanth’s brain works
dants are today called Resonance. faster than Chacha
giraffes. ● Rajinikanth can lick his Chaudhary’s.
● Rajinikanth can make elbows. ● Rajinikanth doesn’t shower.
onions cry . He only takes blood baths.
● Rajinikanth destroyed ● To be or not to be? That is
the periodic table, because the question. The answer?
he only recognises the Rajinikanth.
element of surprise. ● The quickest way to a
● Rajinikanth once got man’s heart is with
into a knife-fight. The Rajinikanth’s fist.
knife lost. ● Where there is a will, there
● Rajinikanth never RAJINIKANTH is a way Where there is
wet his bed as a CAN STRANGLE Rajinikanth, there is no other
child. The bed wet way .
itself in fear. YOU WITH A ● Rajinikanth doesn’t bowl
● Rajinikanth does CORDLESS strikes, he just knocks down
not own a stove, one pin and the other nine
oven, or PHONE faint out of fear.
microwave, ● Archaeologists unearthed
because revenge is an old English dictionary dat-
a dish best served ing back to the year 1236. It
cold. defined “victim” as “one
● Rajinikanth has who has encountered
already been to Rajinikanth”.
Mars, that’s why THERE IS NO SUCH ● Once a cobra bit
there is no sign of life Rajinikanth’s leg.
there. THING AS GLOBAL After five days of
● Rajinikanth doesn’t WARMING. RAJINIKANTH excruciating
move at the speed of pain, the cobra
light. Light moves at the WAS FEELING COLD, SO died.
speed of Rajinikanth. ● Rajinikanth is
● When you say ‘no one is HE BROUGHT THE SUN a champion in
takes this as a person-
CLOSER TO HEAT THE the game hide-n-
seek, as no one can
al insult. EARTH UP hide from
● Google won’t RAJINIKANTH’S Rajinikanth.
find Rajinikanth CALENDAR GOES ● Rajinikanth proves
because you don’t Newton wrong all the time.
find Rajinikanth; STRAIGHT FROM RAJINIKANTH Every time he performs an
Rajinikanth finds MARCH 31 TO DOESN’T action, he simply elimi-
you. nates anything and
APRIL 2. NO ONE BREATHE. AIR
RAJINIKANTH’S everything that can
leaves messages FOOLS
NEXT FILM IS HIDES IN HIS RAJINIKANTH provide the reaction.
before the beep. RAJINIKANTH ● Rajinikanth is a
● Rajinikanth calls CALLED TWITTER LUNGS FOR CAN ANSWER A weapon created by god
Voldemort by his name.
— HE PLAYS 140 PROTECTION MISSED CALL to use on doomsday to
● Rajinikanth is so fast, end the world.
he can run around the world CHARACTERS ● Aliens do indeed exist.
and punch himself in the They just know better than
back of the head. to visit a planet that
● Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a Rajinikanth is on.
watch. He decides what time RAJINIKANTH ● Rajinikanth does not style
it is. ● Rajinikanth once ate an his hair. It lays perfectly in
● In an average living room KNOWS WORDS LIKE entire bottle of sleeping place out of sheer terror.
there are 1,242 objects AWESOMENESS, pills. They made him ● When Rajinikanth plays
Rajinikanth could use to kill VICTORIA’S ● Rajinikanth will
BRILLIANCE, blink. Monopoly it affects the world
you, including the room itself. attain separate state- ● Rajinikanth does economy .
● When Rajinikanth is asked SECRET hood in 2013. LEGENDARY ETC WERE not get frostbite. ● Rajinikanth is the only
to kill someone he doesn’t ● Rajinikanth did, in ADDED TO THE Rajinikanth bites man to ever defeat a brick
know, he shoots the bullet and fact, build Rome in a frost. wall in a game of tennis.
directs it the day he finds out. day. DICTIONARY IN THE ● Rajinikanth got his ● Rajinikanth’s house has no
● Rajinikanth has counted to ● Rajinikanth can YEAR 1949. THAT WAS drivers licence at the doors, only walls that he
, in McDonald’s, and got it. play the violin with a age of 16 seconds. walks through.
● There are no weapons of ● Rajinikanth can win at piano. THE YEAR ● The statement
mass destruction in Iraq. Solitaire with only 18 cards. ● Rajinikanth kills RAJINIKANTH “nobody can cheat death”,
Rajinikanth lives in Chennai. ● The Bermuda Triangle Harry Potter in the eighth WAS BORN is a personal insult to
● Water boils faster when used to be the Bermuda book. Rajinikanth. He cheats and Add to this list.
Rajinikanth stares at it. Square, until Rajinikanth ● Rajinikanth gave the Joker fools death everyday. Tell firstname.lastname@example.org