Purposeful Influence: Keynote at Connecticut Leadership Institute, ...

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Keynote by Peter Bromberg
Connecticut Library Leadership Institute
West Hartford, CT August 9, 2013
Purposeful Influence
h...

I Believe that…
We all exert influence
We can make conscious choices
that will increase our influence
We can learn to make...

“Between stimulus and response there is
a space.
In that space is our power to choose our
response.
In our response lies o...

Why Are We Here Today?

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Today

World population: 7,200,000,000
Ever Lived: 108,000,000,000
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nationallibrarynz_commons/3326203...

Why Are We Here Today?

Change
the absolutely crazy
historically unprecedented
accelerating pace of
or…
Why your ability and willingness to
influe...

Exponential Pace of Change
1.5 mill yrs lever, wedge
500,000 yrs control of fire
50,000 yrs bow & arrow
5,000 years wheel ...

The pace of change is accelerating and the
progression is exponential. We are actually
doubling the power of these technol...

Change & Expectations
“Everything’s amazing and nobody’s happy”
-Louis CK

Exponential Pace of Change
1.5 mill yrs lever, wedge
500,000 yrs control of fire
50,000 yrs bow & arrow
5,000 years wheel ...

Unfreeze/Change/Refreeze
www.flickr.com/photos/circulating/3251962169 Kurt Lewin

It feels like this…

It feels like this

And it sounds… like this

“And you know
something is
happening here
but you don’t know
what it is…
Do you,
Mr. Jones?”
And it sounds… like this

And it sounds… like this
Ballad of a Thin Man
Recorded 8/2/65
Morley Safer sends
1st Vietnam report
indicating we are
losi...

The beginning
of the end
of
NORMAL

Permanent Whitewater
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nukeit1/244167779/

Permanent Whitewater
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nukeit1/244167779/
That‟s great…
So what do we do
about it?

Photo cc license 2.0 courtesy flickr user Chrissy Eliza
http://www.flickr.com/photos/chrissyeliza/4142314898/sizes/l/in/ph...

Flatter Organizations

http://newcdn.flamehaus.com/Valve_Handbook_LowRes.pd f
Flatter Organizations

Flatter Organizations

A Strong Shared Vision
Image source: http://www.thetransactiontax.org/2012/01/16/i-have-a-dream/

-
- Have no formal authority
- Are passionate & engaged
- Motivate others
- Initiate new ideas
- Seek others’ opinions
(Em...

Connected Influence
- Mark Goulston and John Ullment

“You cannot antagonize
and influence at the same
time.”
- J.S. Knox

Your Here
http://justinmaier.com/2006/05/09/amazing-3d-art-by-julian-bever/

http://justinmaier.com/2006/05/09/amazing-3d-art-by-julian-bever/
Their There

Three Traps that Disconnect
1. Fight or Flight
2. Habit Handicap
3. Error Blindness
- Adapted from “Real Influence” by Mar...

CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 http://www.flickr.com/photos/wespeck/4960579336/sizes/l/in/photostream
“I think about what both sides want...

A Few Steps to Connected Influence
Adapted from Goulston and Ullmen
CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 http://www.flickr.com/photos/wespeck/4...

Influence or Leadership?
“A piece of spaghetti or a
military unit can only be led
from the front end.”
- General George Pa...

Influence or Leadership?

Followership

Followership

Courageous Followership
1. The courage to assume responsibility
2. The courage to serve and support others
3. The courage ...

Courageous Followership
“Followers don‟t serve leaders. Both
followers and leaders serve a common
purpose, serve a vision....

Leadership is…
The alignment of our energy and the
energies of others towards the
manifestation of a
mutually enriching fu...

Warren Bennis‟
Four Competencies of Leadership
Attention
Meaning
Trust
Self
(Hey… that sounds an awful lot like…)

Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
Definition of EQ from Daniel Goleman

Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
• Self-awareness
• Self-regulation
• Social skill
• Empathy
• Self-Motivation
Definition of EQ...

It‟s Not About Being Nice
Image: CC by 2.0 http://www.flickr.com/photos/dirigentens/4592361218/sizes/l/in/photostream

When we avoid
difficult conversations
we trade short term discomfort
for long term dysfunction
CC by 2.0 http://www.flickr...

Courageous Conversations
Concern
Trust
Respect
Appreciation
Affection
Hope
Nicholas Burbules, Dialogue in Teaching. Theory...

Effective Communication

Effective Communication
is Rooted in EQ
• Self-awareness
• Self-regulation
• Social skill
• Empathy
• Self-Motivation

Raise Your EQ: Make it a Habit

Know Thyself
Personality Styles
Courtesy Flickr user mayhem (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0) http://www.flickr.com/photos/81126501@N00/39...

Know Others
• DISC
• Myers Briggs
• Enneagram
• Strengths Finder
• True Colors

Platinum Rule
Treat others the way they
want to be treated

Human Beings: A Manual

Extreme Self-Care

Take Care of Your Brain
Courtesy of Flickr x-ray delta one (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0) http://www.flickr.com/photos/x-ray_delta_one/...

Take Care of Your Body
http://www.swiss-miss.com/2010/10/vintage-fitness-equipment.html

Exercise
Courtesy Flickr user kevin dooley(CC BY 2.0) http://www.flickr.com/photos/12836528@N00/2811161524/

Eat Well
(and often)
Courtesy of Flickr user Mike_tn (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0) http://www.flickr.com/photos/beginasyouare/29095322...

Sleep
Library of Congress. No known license:: http://www.flickr.com/photos/library_of_congress/2162949251 /

Take Breaks

Clean up Tolerations
Courtesy Flickr user wetsun (CC BY 2.0) http://www.flickr.com/photos/wetsun/72733049/sizes/z/in/photo...

Meditate
Screenshot from “Guru Meditation”

“Repeated studies have demonstrated that meditation
can rewire how the brain responds to stress. Boston
University researc...

Participating in an 8-week mindfulness meditation
program appears to make measurable changes in brain
regions associated w...

Better Mood
(FYI… Mood Matters)

Happiness Research
“When you are experiencing positive
emotions like joy, contentment, and love,
you will see more possibi...

Resourcefulness
http://www.flickr.com/photos/danisarda/4043404303/sizes/l/in/photostream/
(CC BY-NC-SA 2.0) Flickr user: ~...

Intro to Coaching
When we aren't getting what we
want, we basically have three options
available to us. We can change what...

COACHING
Increases
your state of
resourcefulness

ASSUMPTION:
You are…
Creative
Resourceful
and Whole

Provocative Questions
• What result do I want?
• Were is my attention focused?
• What else could this mean?
• What resourc...

Coaching  Awarness and Action
1. What do you want?
2. What have you tried?
3. What was the result?
4. What else can you d...

Coaching  Awarness and Action
1. What do you want?
2. What have you tried?
3. What was the result?
4. What else can you d...

Trust is the conduit
for influence; it‟s the medium
through which ideas travel.
If they don’t trust you, your ideas are ju...

The Power of Reframing

It‟s not what they
call you,
it‟s what you
answer to.
-W.C. Fields

…one’s own small flame to the
central flames of life and the world.
We cannot predict the exact details of the future, but...

“Choosing to act on „what matters’ is the
choice to live a
passionate existence…
Acting on what matters is a stance
whereb...

“My job is to
awaken possibility
in other people”
-Benjamin Zander
http://www.flickr.com/photos/radiorover/2787677403/

“My job is to
awaken possibility
in other people”
-Benjamin Zander
http://www.flickr.com/photos/radiorover/2787677403/

Peter Bromberg | peterbromberg@gmail.com
Image CC BY-ND 2.0 http://www.flickr.com/photos/iain/4101881178/sizes/l/in/photos...

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