PRE-RECOMMENDATIONS INTRO
FOR BETTERMEANS.COM
Meet the Conversion Sequence
• Developed by MarketingExperiments
• Breaks down the key elements for
crafting copy on the w...
Big Opportunity: Refining the
BetterMeans Value Proposition
A WELL-FORMED VALUE PROPOSITION:
1. Highlights the benefits or...
Sample Strong Value Props
COMPANY/BRAND VALUE PROP TAGLINE
Fresh, quality, great-tasting
fast food made with real
ingredie...
COPY ASSESSMENT FOR
BETTERMEANS.COM
SUMMARY
• Biggest opportunities are on home page
• Navigation copy challenges  too simple?
• “Why” feels like an unnecess...
Overview: Home
• Copy is very sparse
• Copy does not sufficiently explain in text:
– What this product is
– Whom this prod...
Overview: Why
Play button
gets lost on
grey video
Why bettermeans… what?
What is this solution?
GRAMMAR:
Cut comma
in this...
Overview: How
• Fantastic long-form page that clearly breaks
out what’s great about the bettermeans
approach to decision-m...
Overview: What
• Another great page
– Strong headline for the page
– Great headlines to describe the screenshot
– Great bu...
Overview: Pricing
• The 3 reasons to believe at the top (i.e., setup
in 60, no credit card, free trial) get lost in text
•...
Overview: Navigation
• Short words are great
• Unclear what the difference is between “why”,
“how” and “what”
– Little ind...
ASSESSMENT: Your Value Prop
• Too many large words
– Pretend your site visitors are in grade 6, even if they’re PhDs;
simp...
ASSESSMENT: Your Value Prop
• Need to simplify
– From what I can surmise, bettermeans is a project
management tool that le...
COPY RECOMMENDATIONS FOR
BETTERMEANS.COM
Summary
• Add more social proof (e.g., companies using
this product, testimonials, media reviews)
• Let headlines work har...
RECOMMENDATIONS: General
• List the kinds of companies this solution is ideal for
– List the companies who are already usi...
RECOMMENDATIONS: General
• Where possible, use bullet lists
• Avoid paragraphs that are longer than 3 lines
• Let headline...
RECOMMENDATIONS: Your Value Prop
SAMPLE VALUE PROPS FOR BETTERMEANS:
Vote up the best project ideas –
and make every team ...
RECOMMENDATIONS: Nav
• Delete the “why” page entirely
– Other pages cover this content better
• Rename “how” something cle...
OPPORTUNITY: HOME PAGE
RECOMMENDED COPY
Current Home Page
Recommended Copy on Home Page
APPENDIX & MISCELLANEOUS
DESIRE
EXCLUSIVITY
Rank 0 1 2
0
1
2
Value Proposition Assessment Matrix
Desire
0 – No interest
1 – Possible interest
2 – H...
Faster, better decision-making
Smarter project management &
prioritization
Promotes openness
Emphasizes efficiency
Works d...
RECOMMENDATIONS: Messages
• CHANGE THE WORLD: This message, though
nice, feels too lofty and overwhelming for the
average ...
RECOMMENDATIONS: Messages
• REINVENT HOW WE WORK TOGETHER: This
message is brilliant, succinct, and reflective of
what man...
Upcoming SlideShare
Loading in …5
×

Recommendations for bettermeans

20,708 views
20,561 views

Published on

copy recommendation for bettermeans

2 Comments
47 Likes
Statistics
Notes
No Downloads
Views
Total views
20,708
On SlideShare
0
From Embeds
0
Number of Embeds
650
Actions
Shares
0
Downloads
0
Comments
2
Likes
47
Embeds 0
No embeds

No notes for slide

Recommendations for bettermeans

  1. 1. PRE-RECOMMENDATIONS INTRO FOR BETTERMEANS.COM
  2. 2. Meet the Conversion Sequence • Developed by MarketingExperiments • Breaks down the key elements for crafting copy on the web • All my feedback will be based largely on this sequence C = Conversion M = Motivation People come to your site with a particular motivation in mind. The motivation to visit BetterMeans may be to learn about a cool new tech company or (preferably) to find a great new project management solution. You cannot influence motivation on your site; you can only reflect your users’ motivations in your copy. V = Value proposition A value proposition is, potentially, the most important copy on your website (especially for new users). It should be placed early on in the funnel on your site – at least on your home page and on your key landing pages (e.g., PPC landing pages). NOTE: Value props are not necessarily taglines, though they can be. I = Incentive An incentive – like a promo – is too often used by new companies to get people in… but it should really be a last resort (i.e., if value prop, motivation, and anxiety-busters aren’t working). F = Friction Fiction is simply how difficult it is for users to make sense of your messages and/or use your site. It’s usability. A = Anxiety Visitors may come to your site with anxiety visitors have about choosing your solution (e.g., anxious about switching from current project management solution; anxious about signing up for new product). Down the road, you may want to speak to users in greater detail about their anxieties so you can overcome them at key points on your site.
  3. 3. Big Opportunity: Refining the BetterMeans Value Proposition A WELL-FORMED VALUE PROPOSITION: 1. Highlights the benefits or values of the BetterMeans offering that are MOST DESIRABLE to customers 2. Is stated in a single, succinct, meaningful and clear statement 3. Applies only to your brand/offering (i.e., EXCLUSIVE to you; your competitors can’t claim the same) 4. Survives the test of time (is unchanging) Your current value proposition
  4. 4. Sample Strong Value Props COMPANY/BRAND VALUE PROP TAGLINE Fresh, quality, great-tasting fast food made with real ingredients. Where’s the beef? Quality Is Our Recipe The milk chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hands. The milk chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hands. The world’s leading diamond company with unrivalled expertise in the exploration, mining and marketing of diamonds. A diamond is forever Compare hundreds of travel sites at once to find the deal that’s right for you. Search One and Done
  5. 5. COPY ASSESSMENT FOR BETTERMEANS.COM
  6. 6. SUMMARY • Biggest opportunities are on home page • Navigation copy challenges  too simple? • “Why” feels like an unnecessary page • No clear calls to action on any pages • Heavy paragraphs on some pages
  7. 7. Overview: Home • Copy is very sparse • Copy does not sufficiently explain in text: – What this product is – Whom this product is ideal for – What pain you will solve for me & my team – Why I should click to learn more • Value proposition is complex, difficult to grasp • Video does all the talking… but it’s 3+ minutes long (so it’s not ‘scannable’) • No social proof (i.e., anxiety-reducers): – Which company that I trust is using this product already? – What do existing users have to say about this product? – What newspapers, bloggers, etc are writing about this product? • See APPENDIX for more about your key messages here
  8. 8. Overview: Why Play button gets lost on grey video Why bettermeans… what? What is this solution? GRAMMAR: Cut comma in this line The Einstein quote to the side explains all of the copy I’m now covering. Although this copy is good, it’s “warmup” text that may lose the reader.Break up paragraphs of text with bullets, links and headlines. No call to action in this important area It’s not clear what the value of this page is. The “how” page seems to do what this page does, but better.
  9. 9. Overview: How • Fantastic long-form page that clearly breaks out what’s great about the bettermeans approach to decision-making, prioritization, and project management • The section “Order Derived from…” is a bit too overwhelming/intimidating to read with its multiline copy blocks. • The FAQs at the bottom of the page seem to be strong enough to warrant their own page.
  10. 10. Overview: What • Another great page – Strong headline for the page – Great headlines to describe the screenshot – Great bullet lists of what you can do • The ‘blue cloud’ areas between sections on the longer pages create a false bottom – several times, I stopped scrolling, thinking I was at the bottom of the page, only to look at my scrollbar and see that there’s more to go
  11. 11. Overview: Pricing • The 3 reasons to believe at the top (i.e., setup in 60, no credit card, free trial) get lost in text • The pricing FAQs are good here… but they might also be great with the other FAQs • The tone for the copy on this page is the best tone of any page on the site
  12. 12. Overview: Navigation • Short words are great • Unclear what the difference is between “why”, “how” and “what” – Little indication as to what a user will find inside each page… so no reason to click • Could just as easily name them 1, 2, 3 or A, B, C
  13. 13. ASSESSMENT: Your Value Prop • Too many large words – Pretend your site visitors are in grade 6, even if they’re PhDs; simple, clear language is easier to read for everyone in stimulating computer environments • I have no idea what it means – Needs to be clear… which means the average visitor to your site should be able to ‘get it’ the first time they read it • Tries to cram in everything – Your value prop needs to focus on what’s important for customers about your offering Your current value proposition
  14. 14. ASSESSMENT: Your Value Prop • Need to simplify – From what I can surmise, bettermeans is a project management tool that lets you vote on what you want to work on • Yes, there’s much more to it than that… but you have to choose a small number of important points and state them clearly… or users won’t get it • Says nothing about your target market – It doesn’t have to say anything about your ideal customer… but that could really help
  15. 15. COPY RECOMMENDATIONS FOR BETTERMEANS.COM
  16. 16. Summary • Add more social proof (e.g., companies using this product, testimonials, media reviews) • Let headlines work harder • Use more ‘scannable’ text (e.g., bullets, button calls-to-action) • KEY: Refine value proposition
  17. 17. RECOMMENDATIONS: General • List the kinds of companies this solution is ideal for – List the companies who are already using it – In your FAQs section, you list the types of organization this solution is best for… but I’d recommend you get more specific; “knowledge-based collaboration” could mean “tech startups”, couldn’t it? Use clearer keywords that users are looking for… and don’t be afraid to show an actual bullet list of org types that this solution’s made for. • Reconsider interruptive ‘blue clouds’; link in more traditional ways, or make the clouds look like buttons you can click • Consider putting top reasons to believe (e.g., setup in 60) into graphical form so they get noticed
  18. 18. RECOMMENDATIONS: General • Where possible, use bullet lists • Avoid paragraphs that are longer than 3 lines • Let headlines work harder: – Elevate great statements like “Be 10x as productive as traditional companies” to headlines – Example changes: • “New Team Structure” becomes “Goodbye, Boss Man” • “Full Transparency” becomes “No More Secrets” • “Distributed Leadership. Not Management” becomes “Let Great Leaders Rise to the Top” • Include more obvious calls to action – Currently lacking traditional buttons and text links, which, although ‘traditional’, really help people make decisions
  19. 19. RECOMMENDATIONS: Your Value Prop SAMPLE VALUE PROPS FOR BETTERMEANS: Vote up the best project ideas – and make every team member a key contributor The innovative project management solution for innovative small businesses The smart, affordable – and democratic – way to tackle complex problems in your org Rethink command & control in your organization
  20. 20. RECOMMENDATIONS: Nav • Delete the “why” page entirely – Other pages cover this content better • Rename “how” something clear (e.g., How It Works, How It’s Different, Work Smarter, Get Details, Open Philosophy) • Rename “what” something clear (e.g., Tour, Features) • Turn FAQs sections into FAQs page in nav how it’s better features faqs Current Proposed
  21. 21. OPPORTUNITY: HOME PAGE RECOMMENDED COPY
  22. 22. Current Home Page
  23. 23. Recommended Copy on Home Page
  24. 24. APPENDIX & MISCELLANEOUS
  25. 25. DESIRE EXCLUSIVITY Rank 0 1 2 0 1 2 Value Proposition Assessment Matrix Desire 0 – No interest 1 – Possible interest 2 – High interest Exclusivity 0 – Anywhere else 1 – Somewhere else 2 – Nowhere else Steps: 1. Rank the ideal customer’s desire level for the value proposition. 2. Rank the exclusivity of the value prop. 3. Multiply the two integers. 4. If the total is less than 2, re-craft your value prop. Value Proposition < insert proposed value prop here > Copy page & complete for each VP
  26. 26. Faster, better decision-making Smarter project management & prioritization Promotes openness Emphasizes efficiency Works democratically WHAT CAN YOU DO WITH BM HOW DOES BM CHANGE THINGS? WHY YOU SHOULD USE BM 1. No command & control – everyone’s equal, everyone’s voice is heard 2. New, faster, more efficient ways of making decisions (especially about what your team will work on – great for prioritizing) 3. Smart teams that move quickly: Choose what you want to work on… so ideas that don’t have group support don’t happen (voting)  work environment becomes driven by profit + exciting projects that get voted up (= team engagement) 4. Transparent activity stream – both internal and to public groups (if you want) 5. Promote compensation for contributions 6. Standard collab tools like wikis, discussion boards, document storage Social entrepreneurs WHO SHOULD USE BM Rethink Command & Control
  27. 27. RECOMMENDATIONS: Messages • CHANGE THE WORLD: This message, though nice, feels too lofty and overwhelming for the average person. – We all want to change the world, but we need to have that change broken down for us – like “recycle every Tuesday” or “use green cleaning products”. – From a messaging perspective, I would recommend subordinating the “change our world” message.
  28. 28. RECOMMENDATIONS: Messages • REINVENT HOW WE WORK TOGETHER: This message is brilliant, succinct, and reflective of what many social entrepreneurs already think they’re doing: reinventing something. – Speaks well to your audience of ‘inventors’ (i.e., innovators). – Possibility to push this message further to remind users that innovative people wouldn’t consider doing something the old way… so why should their project management & decision-making processes be old? – From a messaging perspective, I would recommend keeping this message high in the messaging hierarchy.

×