Having a Marriage of Influence - Impacting Your Spouse 10.9.2010
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Having a Marriage of Influence - Impacting Your Spouse 10.9.2010

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Impacting Your Spouse message by Shane and Andrea Fell and the 'Having a Marriage of Influence' young couples event at Elmbrook Church 10.9.2010.

Impacting Your Spouse message by Shane and Andrea Fell and the 'Having a Marriage of Influence' young couples event at Elmbrook Church 10.9.2010.

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Having a Marriage of Influence - Impacting Your Spouse 10.9.2010 Having a Marriage of Influence - Impacting Your Spouse 10.9.2010 Presentation Transcript

  • HAVING A MARRIAGE OF INFLUENCE Week 2: Impacting Your Spouse Guest Speakers Shane & Andrea Fell October 9, 2010 LivingMarriage elmbrook church young couples fellowship LivingMarriage elmbrook church young couples fellowship
  • MATTHEW 5:13-16
  • MATTHEW 5:13-16 You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
  • HAVING A MARRIAGE OF INFLUENCE Impacting Your Spouse
  • “Marriage is a divine conspiracy, arranged by God for your transformation.” ~ John & Stasi Eldredge
  • HEBREWS 10:24
  • HEBREWS 10:24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding 2. Encouraging 3. Interceding
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding • Understanding your Situation 2. Encouraging • Understanding your Spouse 3. Interceding • Understanding your Savior
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SITUATION
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SITUATION 1. Marriage is not easy 2. Our attitude is important 3. Beware of the enemy
  • JAMES 3:2 We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.
  • JAMES 3:2 We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check. ROMANS 3:23 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
  • YOUR ATTITUDE MATTERS
  • YOUR ATTITUDE MATTERS What’s your heart attitude toward your spouse? Is it positive or negative? How do you speak about your spouse when you are not in their presence?
  • EPHESIANS 4:29
  • EPHESIANS 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
  • “Happiness in marriage waits upon the shift from changing you to changing me” ~ John & Stasi Eldredge
  • MATTHEW 7:3-5
  • MATTHEW 7:3-5 Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
  • BEWARE THE ENEMY
  • BEWARE THE ENEMY We have any enemy who does not want to see us succeed in becoming more Christ-like in our marriage. The “father of lies” (John 8:44).
  • Relativity - M.C. Escher
  • JAMES 4:7
  • JAMES 4:7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SPOUSE
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Know your spouse’s story 2. Champion your spouse’s gifts 3. Understand your spouse’s needs
  • QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER
  • QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER Are you a student of your spouse? Do you know their story?
  • I PETER 4:10
  • I PETER 4:10 Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. *For more information on spiritual gifts, see Romans 12, I Corinthians 12, and Ephesians 4.
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E.
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E. S piritual Gifts
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E. S piritual Gifts H eart
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E. S piritual Gifts H eart Abilities
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E. S piritual Gifts H eart Abilities P ersonality
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR S.H.A.P.E. S piritual Gifts H eart Abilities P ersonality E xperiences
  • JAMES 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
  • JAMES 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance EPHESIANS must finish its work so that you may be mature and 2:10 complete, not lacking For we are God's anything. workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
  • QUESTION TO CONSIDER Are you a champion of your spouse using their spiritual gifts, or a stumbling block?
  • HOW DO YOU RECHARGE?
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SAVIOR
  • UNDERSTANDING YOUR SAVIOR • You have a Savior (and it’s not your spouse) • Your spouse has a Savior (and it’s not you)
  • PSALM 62:1 My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.
  • PSALM 62:1 My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. MATTHEW 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
  • “The greatest gift you can give to your marriage is for you to develop a real relationship with Jesus Christ.” ~ John & Stasi Eldredge
  • QUESTION TO CONSIDER
  • QUESTION TO CONSIDER Are you more concerned with your spouse pleasing God than you are with your spouse pleasing you?
  • QUESTION TO ASK YOUR SPOUSE
  • QUESTION TO ASK YOUR SPOUSE How can I help cheer you on in your relationship with God?
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding 2. Encouraging 3. Interceding
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding 2. Encouraging • Encourage by word 3. Interceding • Encourage by deed • Share how God is at work
  • GALATIANS 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
  • GALATIANS 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. JAMES 2:17-18 Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
  • •Share what God is doing in your life, and ask your spouse what God is doing in their life. •Prayerfully encourage your spouse to grow in their walk with Christ and to serve (individually and as a couple).
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding 2. Encouraging 3. Interceding
  • IMPACTING YOUR SPOUSE 1. Understanding 2. Encouraging 3. Interceding • Pray for your spouse • Pray with your spouse
  • JAMES 5:16
  • JAMES 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
  • INTERCEDING FOR YOUR SPOUSE
  • INTERCEDING FOR YOUR SPOUSE •Pray for your spouse, specifically, every day. •Pray with your spouse, specifically, every day.
  • CLOSING THOUGHTS
  • CLOSING THOUGHTS HEBREWS 10:24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.
  • APPLICATION
  • APPLICATION • Become a student of your spouse.
  • APPLICATION • Become a student of your spouse. • Become the champion of your spouse’s gifts. Take joy in their growth and celebrate.
  • APPLICATION • Become a student of your spouse. • Become the champion of your spouse’s gifts. Take joy in their growth and celebrate. • Consider where might you need to sacrifice to help your spouse grow.
  • APPLICATION • Become a student of your spouse. • Become the champion of your spouse’s gifts. Take joy in their growth and celebrate. • Consider where might you need to sacrifice to help your spouse grow. • Openly share what God is doing in your life.
  • APPLICATION • Become a student of your spouse. • Become the champion of your spouse’s gifts. Take joy in their growth and celebrate. • Consider where might you need to sacrifice to help your spouse grow. • Openly share what God is doing in your life. • Pray for and with each other every day.
  • SMALL GROUP DISCUSSION
  • SMALL GROUP DISCUSSION • Share something that you appreciate about your spouse, or give an example of something your spouse has done recently that demonstrated serving love. • How do you “recharge” individually or as a couple? • How might you and your spouse use your gifts, abilities, and experiences to serve Christ?
  • CONNECT WITH LIVING MARRIAGE ONLINE
  • CONNECT WITH LIVING MARRIAGE ONLINE Blog - livingmarriage.wordpress.com Follow us on Twitter @livingmarriage
  • Looking Ahead ... HAVING A MARRIAGE OF INFLUENCE Week 3: Impacting Others Guest Speakers Dick & Cindy Greenup October 16, 2010 LivingMarriage elmbrook church young couples fellowship LivingMarriage elmbrook church young couples fellowship