Sex a for men and women

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  • 1. Let‘s face it, guys are pretty spoilt for ways to woo us. From BBM-ing sweet nothings to texting usraunchy pics, there‘s a bizillioninventive tricks to leave us loved-up and breathless. But nowa newsurvey has revealed exactly what guys and gals really want in bed – and guess what? There‘snot a pair of crotchless pants in sight. PHEW. Here we reveal the results, ensuring you‘re both raringto go, Cosmo-style:SEE CELEBRITY PDAs AT THE BALL GAME!Talk dirtyAccording to the survey, nearly half of all adults have engaged in a little ‗dirty talk‘ over the phone. Ifyou haven‘t, why the heck not? Get dialing ladies, but make er, sure you call his mobile not his deskphone. And always check he hasn‘t put you on speakerphone first...But not too dirtyShare this among your male buddies – use the L-word boys! 42% of women said that being told ‗Ilove you‘ gets them hotter than being told they were ‗hot‘. To cover all bases, why not try them both?Just sayin‘.Vino + meal = sex O’clockSometimes simple really is best. Both sexes unanimously agreed that sharing a romantic meal with anice bottle of wine makes for the perfect pre-passion night of fun. So ditch the elaborate day atMonkey World, followed by the hot balloon ride and sparklers in the horse and carriage ride andgosimple. Less pressure guarantees more fun. And we all want fun in bed, right?HAVE AN ORGASM - ITS GOOD FOR YOUGet sextingYounger men and women ‗fessed up to getting stuck in to sexting – with 22% saying they‘re likely toget turned on by a raunchy text message. Start small and if he‘s got an iPhone, leavethe really explicit stuff till the end of the message – you‘ve seen the first few lines of a text flash upon your mates‘ screens before, right? We‘re thinking of your future blushes here!Add some lengthOoer. 65% of women said they were satisfied by the length of their sex-sessions but 55% of menhoped for a bit longer between the sheets. Fancy being kind? Treat him to an extra few minutes (wethink watching Made in Chelsea in bed counts, don‘t worry).SEE KSTEW AND RPATTZS LOVED UP MOMENTSLet him be your fantasy38% of couples say they fantasize about their significant other but 19% say they‘ve had lustfulthoughts over a colleague. Recurring dreams about David Hasselhoff? Don‘t panic. 38% of couples
  • 2. fantasize about getting it on with a celeb so it‘s borderline acceptable. Almost. Had a sexy dream?Tell him about it – who knows, maybe he‘ll dress up as R-Patz for you (imagine the LOLs).How to Attract Younger WomenThere‘s a character called Mike on the hilarious American sitcom, My Boys – a commitment-challenged man who is always trying to hit on younger women but is never successful.You‘re out with friends and you see these hot and young twenty year olds or women in their thirtiesand immediately you want to go over and talk to them. But you feel that she will reject you because ofyour age. ‗I‘m too old for her,‘ you might think, which is a fair call if you‘re thinking of hitting on a25-year old when you need adult incontinence diapers to keep you from embarrassing yourself. Butotherwise, you‘re wrong. Attracting younger women is not as hard as you think. Men, just likewomen, want to feel they have it in them to attract people of all ages at any given point in their life. Itis a HUGE ego booster. There is no special formula to attract younger women. It just calls for a mildalteration in your approach. Read on:WhereWell, just like you head to a museum or a library to meet intelligent women, you got to head tohappening clubs, music concerts, coffee shops and other such places that is frequented by youngfolks to meet young women.Then?Once you spot the girl you like, approach her like you‘d approach any other woman – be confidentand be yourself. When talking to her, be respectful and act your age. You do not have to memorizecheesy pick up lines, just be forthright and direct. The key here is to not make her feel like a silly littlegirl. Treat her like an adult. Don‘t act like her babysitter. Don‘t be condescending or pedantic, butkeep the conversation fun and interesting.UseUse your maturity to your advantage. Bring in that sophistication. She must be tired of being hit onby immature, arrogant fools who think just saying, Hey good looking, is enough for her to put out.However young a woman is, she still wants to be wooed and be treated like a lady. Here‘s where youstep in.TimingJust because she smiled at you and shared a few jokes, don‘t jump the gun and ask her out in yourfirst meeting. That might turn her off and she might put you in the same category of desperate menwho are just looking to score. Wait it out a bit. If she‘s a waitress at a coffee shop, visit the shop once
  • 3. or twice. Be friendly, be funny during those interactions. Once you‘re sure she demonstrates somesort of liking for you, go for it. The idea is to ask her out in such a way that she will say yes andnothing else. ―You missed this great Metallica concert last night. I would have invited you but I didn‘thave your number‖– something to this effect. ―I‘m going for this stand up gig tonight. You game?‖Act confident and sure of yourself. That automatically raises your attraction quotient.MaintainFine, you got a date. Now it‘s time for the real thing. Till now, your interactions with her werelimited. She has formed this image in her head of a man who is fun, charming, and sophisticated.Now it‘s up to you to maintain that image. You have to display the same characteristics you displayedthe first time you met her. Also, remember to not be too hasty when making your move, but alsodon‘t leave it for too late either.So, it‘s not really that difficult to attract younger women. You just need to alter your approach mildlyand find out things to talk about and do, which would keep her interested in you. It‘s simple: withintelligent, mature women, you would probably discuss the world‘s future, but with a much youngerwoman, you should pick things that are more current, like movies (The Avengers), music (BrunoMars), travel (Spain) etc. There‘s no reason why you can‘t be dating a younger woman. With somepractise, you should be able to score a date with a beautiful young woman.How to Kiss PassionatelyIt really doesn‘t matter if you are player or just getting started, the bottom-line is you need to be amore-than-good kisser to present yourself as lovable and passionate.If you have been struggling to get the action mastered, consider the following set of tips.Getting PreparedTo get started, you need to ensure there are no distractions. Get rid of all the apprehensions in yourmind and leave your worries behind for some other day. Be confident of yourself. Better circulationof blood means that your face will feel warmer, more welcoming and supple — something that isoften ignored whenkissing passionately is discussed - so, think naughty thoughts.Getting Expressive With Your LipsIt really doesn‘t matter whether you bump your nose or your teeth collide. These things really don‘tmatter as long as you are ready to get creative with your lips. For starters, a passionate kiss canseldom be a light one. You need to press your lips with your partners. Don‘t fret about what justright. Just remember that your lips should be smudged without worrying about the rhythm. If youare slightly more experienced in this niche, try to start with a full-on kiss and alternate it with lighter
  • 4. ones. The lighter mode includes moving away from her lips for a second, gathering your breath andthen diving deeper with more momentum.Getting Creative With Your Lips & TongueThe French take the honors for inventing a rather passionate way of kissing. However, FrenchKissing isnt the only type of kiss that expresses passion. Forget about every rule in the book ofkissing you have ever read or heard about. Keep it simple and try out as many variations as you. Thebest way to be a passionate kisser is to be spontaneous. This means doing everything possible withyour tongue too. For instance, you can be sloppy with your tongue. This means smearing yourpartners lips with a bit more of wetness and then repeatedly wiping it off with your lips. Suck yourpartners lower lip into your mouth by shaping your lips like a big pout. When his/her lips are insideyour mouth, tease and nibble them with your tongue and teeth.Getting Aggressive Without Being FastPerhaps, one the most overlooked aspects of kissing passionately is the pace. There are no ruleswhen you are trying to be spontaneous and expressive. However, it is recommended not to be tooquick about it. Every variation of a kiss that you try should be slow in the execution. Whether it ispleasing him/her in bed or kissing passionately, being quick isnt the wisest approach sense it makesyour sense rush through the motions, reducing the overall impact, not allowing your mind to processevery bit of exhilaration it feels.When Trying to Kiss Passionately Use Your Body TooThis passionate kissing tip is applicable to all those who are under the impression that your mouthneeds to do all the work when kissing. The reality is that the manner in which your embrace yourpartner, preferably a tight hug, makes a major difference. The closer your bodies are pressed againsteach other, the better access you will have to your partners mouth. More bodily contact also suggeststhat you are more passionate about him/her and arent just testing or trying-out kissing. Slowly pullyour partner closer when kissing, it will create a better impact.Explore Beyond the LipsOpinions differ on this aspect, but still most kissing experts suggest not limiting yourself to yourpartners mouth. Use your lips like an explorer on the move. Kiss, lick and taste every bit of his/herface, including the chin, neck, cheeks and eyes. Nibble on her/his face, especially the ears.Sex Secrets Of The Kama Sutra & Other EasternPleasuresKayla Ricci has compiled a suitably decadent guide to the sexual teachings of the East - they reallyare a saucy bunch of know-it-alls, and this book divulges some of the secrets of their sexual history.
  • 5. Taking positions from the classic Kama Sutra through to sex tips from India, Arabia, China andJapan.Discover how to turn your bedroom into a seductive chamber of love, turn your partner on throughtantric erotic massage and indulge the submissive in you by playing at being his geisha.Packed with erotic yet useful photographs to help you recreate the positions, seduction techniquesand sex tips every couple should know - from prolonging foreplay to finding his G-spot, this book isour new bottom drawer must-have read.Sex Secrets of the Kama Sutra, Kayla Ricci, DK, £14.99, www.dk.com.Love’s tailor and other explosive sex movesThe way in which you and your lover move during sex can yield some sizzling sensations for both ofyou. Your moves can also change the mood of lovemaking from sensual to feverish in an instant. InThe Perfumed Garden, Sheikh Nefzawi recommends a variety of movements, described below, tohelp you get maximum pleasure.Love’s tailor To set the mood for rampant sex, he should try this teasing opener. He inserts the tipof his penis inside her and makes tiny back and forth rubbing movements. The friction will feelfantastic on the acutely sensitive area just inside her vagina. Then, just when she is relaxing intothese blissful sensations, he gives her an erotic jolt by suddenly sliding all the way in.Bucket in the well Embrace each other closely in a face-to-face sex position and then take turns tomove alternately: he thrusts in and out, then she thrusts, and so on. Increase the pace as you go anddo not worry if, by the moment of climax, sex is so wild that you have abandoned the carefuldiscipline of taking turns.
  • 6. The mutual shock This is a move that will make you gasp as your bodies slam together on eachstroke. After penetration, pull yourselves apart so that just the tip of the penis remains inside. Pausefor a tantalizing moment and then push forward quickly so your bodies collide and the penis entersdeeply once more. Now repeat this technique, but make sure you are extremely well lubricated.Love’s bond She lies still while he penetrates her deeply and then grinds with his pelvis withoutremoving even the smallest portion of his penis from her vagina. The Perfumed Garden is passionateabout the benefits of this simple movement: women love it because it gives both deep vaginal andclitoral stimulation. Sheikh Nefzawi says it ―procures them the greatest pleasure‖. A man benefitsfrom being deeply and snugly enclosed, and the unusual plane of movement means that he can lastlonger.Stimulating his G-spot with your fingers can give him an immediate sexual high, leading to a morethrilling orgasm – and a new sensation to the one he usually experiences directly through his penis.The Chinese way of accessing the G-spot is via a special place on the perineum called Hui Yin, whichmeans ―the gate of life and death‖.His pleasure point The male G-spot, also known as the ―P-spot‖, is actually the prostate gland – asmall gland that lies inside the body just underneath a man‘s bladder, which is sensitive to sexualstimulation. Although you cannot touch the prostate directly, there are two indirect ways ofstimulating it: through the perineum or via the anus. Exploring his G-spot is easier if you usemassage oil or another type of sex lubricant.Pressing Hui Yin This is the most accessible route to giving him G-spot ecstasy. She should slideher fingers up and down his perineum – the area between his testicles and his anus – caressing himwhile she locates the pleasure point. Once she has found a spot that feels like a slight indentationhalfway between his scrotum and anus, she should gently apply pressure to it with the pad of her
  • 7. fingertip (or the second knuckle of her middle finger if she has long nails). This is his Hui Yin spot –also known by the Chinese as the ―million dollar spot‖. Try applying deep static or pulsating pressureand ask him which he enjoys most. Don‘t be afraid of pressing quite deeply – the area you arestimulating lies inside his body rather than just under his skin. Now take the erotic tension tobreaking point by adding some passionate oral sex.Lasting longer Men can use the Hui Yin point to delay ejaculation. They simply press it when theyfeel themselves getting too excited during sex. Rather than sustaining the pressure, they just press itbriefly until they feel back in control. This technique is sometimes called the Chinese squeeze.Give him peak pleasure Once you have familiarized yourself with your lover‘s G-spot, make himconvulse with pleasure by stimulating all his hotspots at once: his penis, his testicles, his Hui Yinspot, and his anus. T his might sound like a lot of areas to attend to all at once, but you can enlist hishelp: nestle your face between his legs and invite him to masturbate as you press your finger firmlyagainst his Hui Yin point. As he begins to get more aroused, gently flick the tip of your tongue againsthis testicles and perineum. Now give him maximum pleasure, by using the lubricated tip of yourindex finger (on your other hand) to stroke, caress, repeatedly tap, or press his anus.Japanese geishas and courtesans are renowned for their graceful methods of seduction. Rather thanjumping straight into bed, they take a sensual and leisurely approach to lovemaking – the aim is tobuild arousal bit by bit until both lovers are trembling with desire to have each other.Decadent bath Start the evening by sharing a traditional Japanese bath. Once you have filled thetub, pour in two glasses of sake (this alcoholic drink is said to draw out toxins and make your skinsmooth and beautiful). Immerse yourselves and inhale the distinctive fragrance that lifts off with thesteam. Stroke and fondle each other, but don‘t get too carried away … not just yet.
  • 8. Soap massage Stand up in the bath and drizzle each other‘s bodies with liquid soap. Embrace in astanding position and slide your hands all over each other‘s curves and crevices, working up a frothylather (let your hands linger on each other‘s hotspots). If you enjoy this soapy massage, you canemulate the Japanese ancient tradition and continue the slippery foreplay in the bedroom: lie downon a waterproof sheet or mattress and slide, glide, and writhe against each other in foreplay that isgloriously soapy.Make an entrance Women: after your bath, request that your lover waits for you in bed. Make atrue geisha-style entrance – glide into the room looking stunning in a kimono and red lipstick (andnothing else). Carry a plate of bite-sized treats: cherries, grapes, small pieces of rich, dark chocolate,or sushi. Kneel beside your lover (with your kimono artfully arranged to reveal a thigh, shoulder, orbreast) and feed each other. Gaze into each other‘s eyes as you eat. Now slide into bed together andslowly get more intimate. Caress and stroke each other‘s bodies and slowly work down to thegenitals. And when you do, try this geisha technique: dip a paintbrush in lubricant and using slow,delicate brushstrokes, paint the length of his penis. It is guaranteed to send a ripple of pleasurethrough him.Naughty foot massage Women can try a classic technique used by Japanese courtesans during theEdo period. Make sure your feet are looking gorgeous (try an at-home pedicure and paint yourtoenails with crimson nail varnish), then sit between his legs and trap his erect penis between thesoles of your feet. Drizzle lots of oil over his glans so it runs down his shaft. Now drive him wild byrubbing your feet up and down on his penis. Vary the strokes, pressure, and speed (and trysupporting his shaft on the top of one foot while you move the other in firm circles). Use your big toeto tease the tip of his penis, slide it down to his frenulum, and then back up again. Revel in the eyecontact as you do so.5 places you have to have sexDo you want to know the best places to have sex? Look no further – here is your funand frisky guide to the best locations for having sex outside of the bedroom.The best sex locationsWhen you ask most sex experts to rank the five places you really ought to have sex they all inevitablysay somewhere you can get caught; yawn. We‘ve heard it all before.To get really turned on you have to have sex somewhere where you can get caught by a lot of people,which is why a wedding is the perfect place to up the ante. Not only are there at least 100 or sopeople, you‘ll know a lot of them, which pretty much maxes out the risk factor and will give you ahuge shot of adrenalin.If you‘re still not convinced about the erotic benefits of having sex at a wedding, remember everyone
  • 9. will be looking their best and there will be lots of pretty girls and gorgeous guys to choose from. Plusa wedding is full of secret little hideaways and plush furnishings so you and your date can get it on instyle and, fingers crossed, without actually getting caught.Sex beneath the starsIt sounds cheesy, but having sex beneath the stars makes for out-of-this-world sex. Sometimes it canbe easy to get caught up in the kinky side to sex and it can be good to occasionally cut the act andmake it all about you and your girl or guy.The best place to have sex when going for a starlit backdrop is outside; preferably in your garden oron a private balcony. Remember to pack a blanket and some cushions though or you could end upwith a bruised behind. If you don‘t go in for the whole Mother Nature scene then stay indoors.You could always have sex beneath a skylight or even (cringe) on the backseat of a car. Althoughthese aren‘t the most romantic of options hopefully the cosmos will strike some of the starry-eyedwonder back into you both. To take the romance up a level, look into one another‘s eyes for a minuteor so; it will help you both appreciate who you are having sex with and why.Sex on a washing machineWho says washing machines are just for getting things clean? Make full use of your utensil by using itto get filthy with your partner.A washing machine is one of the greatest and most innocent looking sex toys around, which can be awhole lot of fun for both the ladies and the gents. Firstly, switch your machine on. The spin cycleworks best.The girl can either perch on the machine, using it as a chair, whilst the guy does his thing, or the girlcan bend over the appliance, with her stomach laying flat on the machine top, whilst she is takenfrom behind.The latter is probably the best option if you want to please both parties, as the vibrations will rockthrough you both, bringing blood to those all important areas and making them much moresensitive.Sex on a deskBe honest – you must have thought about having steamy sex on your desk. Doing it at a work stationfulfils most people‘s sexy secretary fantasy and there are reasons why it made it onto the five placesyou have to have sex list.Firstly, when at work most of us adopt a new persona. We become harder and sharper. Thereforewhen you hitch up your skirt or shimmy out of your work suit and get it on over your desk, these newdominant personality traits should emerge; making the sex that little bit wilder. Not only is sex on adesk great for bringing forth your more dominant self, it‘s also great ergonomically.
  • 10. You can try out several decent positions safely on a desk and achieve some great, pleasure-inducingangles comfortably.Sex on a Swiss ballSex swings are great for the fanatic, but for the average guy or girl they‘re intimidating, expensiveand difficult to disguise from your neighbours. However, an innocent looking Swiss ball can easily bepassed off as a piece of fitness equipment and it‘s just as good for your sex life as installing a sexswing.You can use the Swiss ball for lots of different positions. The guy can sit down on the ball as if it‘s achair, whilst the girl rides him in a reverse cowgirl position. Or you can position the ball against awall, whilst the girl lays with her back on the ball and the guy goes on top.Feel free to get creative with the Swiss ball as there are lots of different things you can try out athome. A handy tip when using a Swiss ball for sex is to deflate it slightly, so that the ball is notcompletely full of air. Having a softer ball will make it easier to manipulate and manoeuvre and you‘llbe less likely to have a not-so-sexy Swiss ball accident.Top 10 health benefits of sexSo if you were asked to come up with advantages of having sex, what would you say? It helps to keepthe human race going and it‘s fun, right? Turns out there are many more advantages to having sex,health benefits at that! Remember though, the best sex is always consensual and should be safe.Top 10 health benefits of sex1. Sex burns calories30 minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. There‘s a reason for you to make your lovemaking lastlonger and do it more regularly. You‘ll not only feel great, you would‘ve burnt off some unwantedcalories as well!Sex is better when it’s safe. Read the top 10 safe sex tips.2. Helps to reduce stressSexual intercourse helps to reduce blood pressure and this further leads to a reduction in stresslevels.Simple ways to reduce stress.3. Increases hormonesRegular sex leads to an increase in testosterone in men, which helps fortify bones and muscle. Inwomen, regular sex leads to a rise in the hormone oestrogen, which is one of the most importantsafeguards against heart disease.
  • 11. 4. Boosts immunityStudies have found that people who have sex once or twice a week have 30 per cent higher levels ofthe antibody immunoglobulin A, which boosts the immune system and helps fight infections likecolds and the flu.Check out these tips to boost immunity5. Helps you live longerA study conducted at Queens University in Belfast, Ireland tracked one thousand middle-aged menover 10 years. The findings revealed that those who had had orgasms frequently lived longer thanthose who were not quite so active.6. Sex improves heart healthContrary to misconceptions held by those with heart disease, sex is actually safe for most heartpatients. Experts say that if you can walk up two flights of stairs without going out of breath, you cansafely have sex.That‘s not all! Those who regularly have sex have lower blood pressure and cholesterol and anincreased circulation.Video: Watch as Dr Devi Shetty talks about prevention of heart disease7. Strengthens Pelvic Floor MusclesWhen women have sex, they‘re unconsciously doing Kegel exercises which are good for many thingsincluding improved bladder control.What are Kegel exercises? Find out.8. Boosts self-esteemA good sexual experience has many mental benefits as well, including making you feel good aboutyourself. Some studies have shown that it even makes a woman feel younger. Now who doesn‘t wantthat!9. Improves intimacyBesides the obvious closeness and intimacy that comes with sex, having an orgasm increases levels ofa hormone called oxytocin. This is also called the love hormone as it helps humans bond and buildtrust.Trouble in your marriage?10. Sex for better sleepThe increase in oxytocin as a result of sex helps you sleep better. Maybe that‘s why couples like tocuddle and sleep after an invigorating roll in the hay!
  • 12. An introduction to safe sexUse a condom!What is safe sex?If you‘re considering having sex, making sure you and your partner are safe should be the top-mostpriority. The practice of safe sex involves protecting yourself and your partner from sexuallytransmitted diseases (STDs) or infections (STIs) and also pregnancy, if undesired. Some commonSTDs include syphilis, gonorrhoea, chlamydia, genital herpes, genital warts, hepatitis B, hepatitis Cand HIV (that causes AIDS).Safe sex thus means being responsible. This also involves getting tested for STDs or STIs each timeyou have sex with a new partner. If you discover you have an STD or STI, it‘s important to availtreatment and also let your partner know about it, so that he or she can get tested and treated, andalso decide if he/she wants to have sex with you at all.How can you protect yourself?Take precautions against any part of your body, especially mouth, vagina or anus coming in contactwith your partner‘s body fluids. Using a latex or polyurethane condom when you have vaginal, analor oral sex to protect yourself from STDs is, therefore, a must.Condoms can go a long way in preventing STDs, as they provide protection from bacteria and virusespresent in the semen, vaginal fluids and blood from coming in contact with the other‘s body.Make sure you use a condom correctly. Don‘t use the same condom twice, and use just one condomevery time. An extra condom doesn‘t translate into extra protection, it can in fact be detrimental.STDs can spread from people who are unaware that they have one, so make sure you use protectionevery time you have sex.And if you‘re in a relationship, delay having sex until you are physically and emotionally ready for it.Also, it‘s best for both to get tested for STDs before having sex.What about birth control pills?Birth control pills and injections only offer protection against pregnancy and not STDs. While this isan important aspect of safe sex when you‘re not planning a baby, it alone won‘t suffice. STDs can bedangerous, and it‘s very important to protect yourself and your partner from it, so condomis irreplaceable in that sense.When you know you‘re safe, yours and your partners mind will be it at ease and you can enjoy sexbetter. So use protection and put your mind at ease.Also read: Contraceptives: myth busters
  • 13. Negotiating safe sex: Some must ask questions before having sex with someone for the first time. How many people have you had sex with? Have you had more than one sex partner at a time? Have you had sex without a condom? Have you had oral sex without protection? Do you inject illegal drugs, or have you had someone who does? Have you ever has unprotected sex with a prostitute? Have you gotten tested for STDs? If so, what were the results? If you ever had an STD, has it been treated and cured? Have you gotten tested for HIV? If you‘re having difficulty in asking these questions, then having sex, at this point, may not be the best thing for you. And, if you find that your partner is reluctant in answering these questions and is belittling its importance you may want to reconsider your decision to have sex with him/her. Make note, a partner who is disrespecting of you for taking responsibility for your own health and well- being may not be the right person for you to be with. Top 10 sexual fantasies The ex Maybe we love thinking of our ex because it‘s so wrong, or so out of reach; either way, it‘s a turn on and we all love it. Getting this fantasy right is all about anchoring it in reality. You need to visualize places where you and your ex used to hang out, or things you used to do to one another. This way, your fantasy will feel like it could be a reality, which is hot, hot, hot. Lights, camera, action Most people who don‘t like being centre stage in their day-to-day life love lots of attention in their dream world and this is why being filmed during sex is such a popular fantasy. To make this fantasy good think about how you would like to be filmed, what you‘d be doing and who you‘d be doing it with. Is anyone watching, or is this going to be a private tape for those lonely nights in? The cop Who doesn‘t love a uniform? Combine that smart costume with a dominatrix-like attitude and bingo, you have one saucy daydream. Handcuffs, batons and even a police chase can feature within your dream. To keep the cop idea fresh, you should sometimes switch roles and think about being the cop, or being the captured criminal.
  • 14. The clubIt‘s dark, there are lots of young hotties dancing around and then a stunning person walks up to youand... Well, you know the rest. Getting it on in a club had to make it onto the top sexual fantasy listbecause pretty much everyone has wanted to do it or, at the very least, everyone‘s thought aboutwhat it would be like.The strangerMany people would love to try no-strings-attached sex with a complete stranger, but most are tooscared or would feel way to guilty to give it a go. For that reason, this is perfect fantasy material.Choosing a gorgeous stranger who you‘ve spotted during the day is a great way to kick off thisraunchy dream.The food fightFood and sex have always gone hand in hand, so it‘s no wonder that a food fight is one of the topseven fantasies. If you love your food, then you can think about different types, like sweet andsavoury. Plus picture different settings: picking fruit in Spain, in a sauna-like kitchen or even in acafeteria. As always, variety is the key for this food fight fancy.The swimming poolThe swimming pool fantasy often features in big, Hollywood films and why wouldn‘t it? The thoughtof diving into a big, blue pool and finding your all time, number one guy or girl wearing very littleand looking very good is always going to be a huge turn on. This little fantasy will always hold someallure for people, which is why it‘s on our top 10 sexual fantasies list.The teacherWhen you were at school, you hated it, but now you‘ve left, teachers keep popping into your dirtiestthoughts. People may love the teacher fantasy so much because of Britney and her Baby One MoreTime video, but we have a feeling that people love this because of the authoritative role the otherperson can adopt.
  • 15. The threesomeIn reality, threesomes can be awkward incidents that are best forgotten, but in your dream worldthey can be a whole lot of fun. This is such a staple sexual fantasy because it is so easilyinterchangeable. You can have two guys, two girls or one of both sexes. There‘s also endless kinkytricks you can try out in an orgy that would never work with a two-person team.The peep showNot many people would actually like to fantasise about a peep show, but peeping at others who arehaving sex actually excites lots of people. You could think about watching people on screen, or peoplegetting it on outside, like at the beach or in a park. It‘s exciting because there‘s a chance you mightget caught.Girls, boost your sex driveYour guide to getting moreWhen you hear the phrase ―night-time exertion‖, do you think of a vigorous facial and agood, hard floss? If so, then listen up ladies. It‘s time you gave your libido a little bit of TLC.With just a few tricks and changes to your diet you can unleash your inner desire and havesome wild night‘s under-the-covers:Befriend the babiesCrying children and smelly nappies may not sound like the best way to get in the mood for love, but researchers havefound that visiting your friends who have recently become mums is one of the strongest natural aphrodisiacs. Withinthe study those women who smelt pads from breastfeeding women reported a dramatic increase in sexual desire andsexual fantasies. Best book a visit to the maternity award ladies!Indulge in chocolateWe all know that sucking on a piece of melting chocolate is fabulous. What we might not know is that chocolatecontains phenethylamine, a nutrient that we produce when we fall in love. Fantastically, this nutrient also increasesyour libido and makes eating chocolate a guilt-free pleasure. The higher the cocoa content the better; so choose abar that is made from at least 60-70 per cent cocoa solid chocolate. Get munching girls.De-stressYour boss has been nagging you, the plumbing is broken and your in-laws are coming for the weekend; do you wantsex? The answer is always going to be no. When your rational brain is in overdrive the stress hormone, cortisol, isreleased. Cortisol suppresses your oestrogen secretion and this lowers your libido. Counteract stress with massages,a hot bath or a visit to a steam room. Also try to make sex one of your priorities and you‘ll soon see the benefits.
  • 16. Pump itTo get some more action you need to get pumping. Performing pelvic floor exercises will make you more aware ofthe muscles involved in sexual pleasure. To strengthen these muscles, sit comfortably and squeeze as if you aretrying to stop the flow of urine. Repeat this 10-15 times in a row, without holding your breath, or your stomach, buttand thigh muscles. Once you have built some strength into these muscles you will notice that you are more sensitiveduring sex.Have a cuddleSometimes you just can‘t beat a good hug. Although a hug can seem harmless enough, it has the potential to lead tosomething a little more intimate; sex. Researcher, Dr Michel Odent, explains that we all need oxytocin to get sexuallyaroused. We receive increased levels of oxytocin when we have skin-to-skin contact with our partners. Next time youand your man are watching a film, remember to snuggle up to him, who knows where it could lead.Put down that wine glassA few cheeky glasses of wine on a date may seem like the perfect way to get into the boy‘s pants, but think again.Alcohol diminishes sexual arousal and although studies have shown that women are more likely to have sex afterdrinking, according to their findings, those women who do have sex when drunk enjoy it less. To reduce the amountyou drink why not try having a glass of water between each drink, or rather than go to a pub, meet at a café.Get sniffingIt may sound disgusting, it may be your worst nightmare, but bear with us when we say that sniffing your man‘ssweaty gym kit may turn you on. According to scientists at the University of California, Berkeley, smelling male sweatcan increase sexual arousal. If you can‘t face taking a whiff of his smelly underarms, why not work out with him?You‘ll still pick up his scent and you‘ll be getting fitter.7 sex experiences you must try
  • 17. 7 ways you need to do itHere are seven sex experiences you must try. From make-up sex to using householdappliances, here are seven ways you need to do it. Take out that red pen of yours and addthese hot and saucy moments to your 50 things to try before I die list:Make-up sexFor some reason make-up sex is amazing. You‘re angry, you‘re fired up and you‘re passionate – then it‘s all forgottenand you‘re jumping under the covers. Make-up sex is great because when you fight your testosterone levels rise,which makes the sex much more aggressive and intense. To make the most of this post-argument loving pull at eachother‘s hair and breathe heavily. Ladies, if you‘ve got nails run them down your guy‘s backs. Guys, you can gentlybite your girl‘s necks. Make sure you do these things softly first and build the aggression up though.The stare gameEye-locked lovers may make you want to barf, but bear with us guys – staring into each other‘s eyes during sex canmake your orgasms more powerful. Try to hold each other‘s gaze for at least a minute, especially during the height ofsex. This will make your orgasms more intense and you‘ll feel intensely close to the other person. If you prefer rearentry positions then you can always put a mirror in the room and stare into one other‘s eyes using the reflection.Ideally though, try to stick with face-to-face contact at least some of the time.
  • 18. Food sexIf you‘re a neat freak you may find food sex hard work. Your sheets will get messy, you‘ll have food in your hair andyou may be finding evidence of your night of passion for a few weeks after. The point is though that you loosen upand have fun. Food is very sensuous and it is often described using sexual words. Get creative with your choices –use foods with different textures, different shapes and different smells. Cream works particularly well, but you mayend up throwing out your bed linen because the smell is hard to disguise.Closet sexHaving sex in a tight space is novel, kinky and can be very, very hot. If you can handle the slightly claustrophobicenvironment and focus on the new angles you are forced to twist and curl into, then you‘ll soon be turned on in atotally new way. The lack of space in a closet will mean that you have to try out new positions and the darkness andnovelty of the situation will get you both really excited. Just remove anything of any value beforehand as it‘s not aneasy space to maneuver around in and accidents may happen.Morning sexWant to get your day started in the best possible way? Then have sex before breakfast. Although mornings may notbe your favourite time to get foxy, those love-struck couples who have sex first thing feel more upbeat and benefitfrom a stronger immune system. Also your sex will be better. Most guys feel more turned on in the morningsbecause their testosterone levels are at their highest at night. You will also be well rested and will therefore have sexfor longer and try out some more energetic positions.Machine sexWe all know that a vibrator is a girl‘s best friend, but vibrations are good for guys too. To turn the heat up in your lovelife pay a visit to your washing machine or tumble dryer. To begin, turn the machine on. Then the girl should bendover at a right angle over the machine, with her stomach and upper body lying flat over the top of the appliance. Theguy then takes her from behind and kneels into the machine. The vibrations will rock through you both, bringing bloodto those all important areas and making them much more sensitive.Alfresco sexThere is a reason that whilst you read this 84,000 people are having sex outside; it‘s incredible. You feel bad and soyour adrenaline levels rise, which makes the sex frantic, frisky and fun. Remember though that although goingalfresco can be spontaneous, it often isn‘t as easy as it seems in the movies. Prepare a little and pack some usefulprops: a blanket, some tissues and a brush. Be careful too, you can get in trouble if you get caught so maybe opt fora safer option and get it on in your garden or balcony.5 shocking sex facts5 sex facts that surpriseSex facts are always brilliant. The problem is we all talk about sex so much that there‘s verylittle that shocks or surprises us anymore. Did you know that there‘s seven calories in onetablespoon of sperm (yawn)? Yet, sometimes you can find a crazy sex gem that bogglesyour mind. Here are five shocking sex facts that will surprise you:
  • 19. Sex can help you give a great speechBefore you get carried away, we are not suggesting you hop into bed with your boss or sleep with the entireaudience. However, having sex can help ease those all too familiar and very dreaded pre-speech nerves. This theorywas developed by the psychologist Stuart Brody, who asked 22 women and 22 men to keep sex diaries about theirbedroom antics. The group of men and women then had to undertake stressful tasks, like public speaking and mentalarithmetic tests. Brody found that the couples who had had penetrative sex were less stressed and their bloodpressure levels returned to normal at more speed that the others. Sadly though, those who ―did it‖ alone did not reapthe calming benefits, so buddy up before your next big speech.The Victorians were filthyIt turns out that the Victorians weren‘t the tight-lipped prudes we once imagined. In fact it would seem that the Brits ofthe nineteenth century were a rather fruity bunch. Not only was this the age that heralded the vibrator as a cure forhysteria, but it also saw a rise in kinky behaviour and tools, such as nipple piercings, pubic wigs and some rathergruesome looking sex chairs. The sauciness doesn‘t end there though. Although it is still disputed, it‘s thought thatthe term blow job also derives from this ―prudish‖ period where people would speak about a ‗below job‘ and referredto prostitutes as ‗blowsys‘.We kiss to inoculateResearchers at the University of Leeds believe that humans kiss to inoculate. Women who catch cytomegalovirustypically cannot carry a baby to term. However, if women are exposed to the virus in small doses then they becomeinoculated. And how can you inoculate against the virus? Why, through swapping saliva of course. Therefore, thebrain boxes at the University of Leeds have concluded that we don‘t jump into bed with each other straightawaybecause if we did we might infect women. Therefore we kiss to protect women from catching cytomegalovirus. Sopucker up and stay healthy by smooching.Giving oral is as good as the gymSadly girls, giving oral will only benefit you if you‘re the giver not the taker. A study has found that pleasuring a guyand swallowing can lower women‘s blood pressure and reduce their risk of getting pre-eclampsia. However, if you
  • 20. don‘t have the stomach to tackle your man‘s area in this way there are other ways you can lower your blood pressure.Another study found that having regular sex with a partner you lived with could lower your diastolic blood pressure,whilst another study found a link between cuddling and reduced blood pressure. So, although you shouldn‘t give upon the gym altogether, ladies, it might be worth swapping your sports kit for something a little slinkier once in a while.Sperm is a great face creamAlthough it‘s not a great idea to bottle your man stuff and give it to your girl as a present, it turns out that spermcontains protein, which if applied to the face has the same anti-wrinkle benefits as moisturising creams. Apparentlythe white stuff can tighten skin and give you a little surgery-free facelift. Interestingly, this isn‘t the only benefit spermhas to offer. It also contains zinc, magnesium, calcium, potassium and fructose. Plus, if you‘re still not convinced thatsperm is super, a recent study in Albany found that women who had sex without condoms had fewer signs ofdepression than women who used condoms or did not have sex at all. Three cheers for semen.Top 10 worst sex injuries10 wince-worthy intercourse accidentsSex is a highly physical act, and like any physical activity it comes with its risks of injury.Here are 10 true stories of wince-worthy mishaps that will have you showing some extracaution the next time you get down to business.Cat attackCats are naturally inquisitive creatures, so how do you think they are going to react if they see you bouncing away onyour bed with no clothes on? Unlucky pet owners have suffered deep cuts and scratches on their backs, butts oreven worse places as a result of a mid-sex cat attack. Some believe this is a sign of cats trying to protect theirowners, whereas others think cats are just a sex-stopping nuisance – either way, be sure to check that your next lovemaking session is feline free.Eye popping orgasmsDo you go into sex wanting a blinding moment of pleasure? Be careful what you wish for. During particularly intenseorgasms, the extreme increase in blood flow can actually lead to ruptured blood vessels in the eyes, causingtemporarily reduced vision. Doctors have reported cases of men and women complaining of reddened eyes anddamaged eyesight, with seemingly no clear causes until they ‗fess up about the particularly exuberant sex they‘d hadrecently.
  • 21. Incorrect lubricationIf anything will make you more careful over what you use as lubricant then it‘s this story. A young man and hisgirlfriend were staying at his grandmother‘s, and when she left the house they decided to have some fun. Aftersearching for lubricant, they found her nitroglycerin paste and decided it would do the job. How wrong they were. Thepaste caused their blood pressures to plummet, and the grandmother returned to find them unconscious and naked inher basement. Probably not the most treasured memory she has of her precious little grandson.Perks of the jobOne unlucky woman in Australia was having sex in a hotel room when her bed-rocking antics caused the glass lightfitting to fall from the ceiling onto her head, injuring her face and mouth. Rather than complaining to the hotelmanagement, the woman instead sued her employers. Why? She was on a business trip, and she claimed they hadcaused her both physical and psychological damage because the intercourse-related incident took place during workrequired travel. Her employers rejected the claim, pointing out that the injury was due to what they tactfully describedas ―a frolic of her own‖.Contraception consumptionWe all know it‘s wise to take precautions, but sometimes safe sex isn‘t as safe as you might think. While performingoral sex, women have been known to accidentally swallow the condoms that their partners were wearing. Because ofthe material condoms are made of they are certainly not designed for human digestion, and can lead to severecoughing and breathing difficulties. They might come in tasty flavours, but swallowing them is definitely not advised.10 wince-worthy intercourse accidentsBeware of glassesWhen the alcohol is flowing one thing can often lead to another, so it won‘t be surprising to hear that beer and wineglasses are one of the items broken most often during sex, second only to bed frames. If you want to avoid painful
  • 22. cuts and sharp objects stuck in places you don‘t want them to be, then be sure to clear away any broken glass beforeyou accidentally roll through it in the throes of passion – it happens more often than you would think.Heart stopping intercourseAlthough it might not seem like it because of the amount of fun you‘re having, remember that sex is still a form ofexercise, with particularly steamy sessions burning over 300 calories in an hour. Research by the Journal of theAmerican Medical Association has found that the increased physical exertion during sexual activity can actually tripleyour risk of a heart attack in the hours shortly after it.Sex and sports don‟t mixSports stars earn millions, are well known celebrities, and are generally in great shape, so it‘s easy to see why theyfind themselves having plenty of sex. However, this high level of sexual activity can actually be detrimental to theircareers because of the strain it piles on their joints and muscles on top of their already demanding training schedules.Footballer Kevin-Prince Boateng found this out when he pulled a muscle in his thigh because of his supermodelgirlfriend, who apparently demanded sex from him seven to 10 times a week. Poor guy.Paralysing hickeyHickeys are the love trophies of teenagers the world over, but they could actually be more dangerous than meets theeye. During sex, a New Zealand woman was given a hickey by her partner, and soon found her left arm partiallyparalysed. Doctors found that her hoover-mouthed husband‘s hickey was so strong that it had caused a blood clot inan artery in her neck, causing her to have a minor stroke.Bumps, breaks and sprainsNot all sex injuries are over the top or extreme – a UK study found that one third of people admitted to suffering minorinjuries resulting from intercourse, including bruises, carpet burns, and sprained wrists and fingers. Five per cent ofthose surveyed even said they‘ve had to miss work because of a sex-related injury, which must be a fun phone call tomake to the boss.What your favourite sex position says about youSex and your personalitySex is personal and it says something about who you are and what you are about. Have aflick through these sex positions and find out what your favourite sex move says about you:The Position: the sandwichHow to do it: girls, you lay flat, face down on the bed, whilst the man in your life lies on top, also facedown. The guymay need to use his arms for support too – getting squashed is not sexy.What this says about you: you love traditional relationships and are completely comfortable with intimacy. This is avery loving position as the girl is exposing her spine, a vulnerable area of her body. The guy is being protective andcaring. You are loyal, fair and open.The Position: doggy styleHow to do it: the girl goes on all fours whilst the guy goes on his knees and positions himself behind her.What this says about you: you are a logical thinker who does not romanticise life. Pleasure is your priority and in agroup you are the fun-loving person who can always be relied on for a good time. You are confident, outspoken anddominant.
  • 23. The Position: twistedHow to do it: Start off as if you are spooning, with the girl in front and the buy behind. The front spoon then slidestheir leg forward and the back spoon tucks their leg in between the front spoons.What this says about you: some say you‘re efficient, others may say you are lazy. This position allows for deeppenetration, which is always a bonus, but it requires very little effort. Maybe you have a hectic life or a partner wholikes sex when you‘re at your sleepiest.The Position: bumper carsHow to do it: you both face in opposite directions, laying facedown. The man hooks his legs over the woman, soyour buttocks are touching and enters from behind.What this says about you: you are highly creative and love to experiment with things others wouldn‘t try. You like tostand out in a crowd and have a very strong sense of who you are. You live for yourself and have been described byothers as a thrill-seeker.The Position: bookendsHow to do it: You and your partner face one another on your knees – it‘s like a vertical missionary position.What this says about you: You are highly diplomatic and consider everyone to be equal. This position sacrificesgood penetration for intimacy, which is a sacrifice you are happy to make. For you sex is about being close with yourbedroom buddy.7 ways to boost your confidence in bedHow to improve your sexual confidenceSex can be pretty daunting. If you‘re not scared about getting your kit off, then there‘s thesmall matter of your moves to consider, or the positions you like. Although sex can be
  • 24. scary, there are certain sex tips that will give your bedroom confidence a boost. Checkthese out:LaughBedroom bloopers happen to everyone. Whether you hit your head, bite your tongue or make a weird noise, the bestthing to do is not to ignore it, but to laugh about it. Sex is not always sexy and you should expect something, at somepoint, to go wrong. Treating it in this light-hearted way will show that you are confident and mature. Even if somethingdoesn‘t go wrong, throwing your partner the odd smile is reassuring and makes you both feel close.Conquer a fearIf you want to be confident under the covers, you need to feel confident in yourself. Overcoming a fear is one of theeasiest ways to boost your self-esteem. Choose something achievable and then work out a feasible way to reachyour goal. Make sure you get people involved in your plan as this will make you stick to it. Ideally, the person you‘resleeping with is the best person you can choose to get involved in your challenge.
  • 25. Stop having sexIf you stop making sex the main goal you might start to think about your naked body differently. Try to do more thingsnaked, so that you and, if you have a guy or girl in your life, they will get used to seeing your naked body. Normalisingnakedness will make you feel comfortable when you strip off. You could shower together, have a naked massage oreven eat your dinners naked. Just remember to shut those curtains!PropsProps make sex fun and if you choose the right ones they can make you feel great in the bedroom. A naughtycostume, some devious make-up or a blindfold can add a spice of sauciness to your love life and it will also give youa new persona. If you go in as Fireman Sam or Police Officer Polly, think of them as a confident, sex god/goddess.Use the act once or twice then switch back to being yourself - remember that you were that person all along.Sharing is caringMen and women feel insecure and at some point it‘s likely that both you and your partner have felt uneasy when thelights go out. Bring up what has been troubling you when you are both alone, in a private place. Let each other speak.If your partner doesn‘t seem to know what to say, don‘t take this as a sign they don‘t care, ask them what they thinkor feel about the situation. Try to come up with a solution or a plan together – something you both feel comfortablewith.Do the mathsWe‘re all insecure about some part of our body and most of the biggest hang-ups are to do with guy‘s penises andwomen‘s chests. Remember, though, the average size of a flaccid penis is between 2.5 inches and 5.5 inches, whilstthe average bra size for women is between a C and a D cup. If you‘re still not happy, for guys trim your hairdownstairs; it will make you seem bigger. Girls, do chest exercises to improve the firmness, lift and shape of yourbreasts.Switch focusIf you start to get nervous, or if you can‘t stop thinking about how big your tummy must look from this angle, switchthe focus. If you‘re just kissing, don‘t think about what will come next. Just concentrate on the thing you‘re doing andtry to enjoy it. If you‘re having sex and the insecurities or nerves arise, don‘t panic. Look your partner in the eye andconcentrate on how good everything feels. Also think: if you‘ve got to this stage then they must fancy you.Girls, 5 ways to make him want youHow to get his attentionHow can you make him want you? Does strutting around in red shoes and some killerlipstick really get his attention? This is your guide to getting noticed by the guy you want –follow these tips and he won‘t be able to resist your charms:Get a lifeNo one likes someone who is too available. The key to making that cute guy want you is to get your own life outsideof work or your other responsibilities. You should take up an extra class, start a project or volunteer; anything thatmakes your life fuller. This way, you‘ll stop spending so much time thinking about that man-shaped hole in your life.
  • 26. Plus you‘ll have lots of interesting things to talk about and you‘ll be happier – and happiness is the best beautyproduct.Don‟t play gamesAlthough you don‘t want to show that you are blatantly, head-over-heels, madly and truly in love with the guy you like,don‘t play too many games. He needs to know that you like him so give him some handy signs. Touch himunexpectedly – not in a creepy, stationary cupboard grope, but when you talk to him, touch his arm lightly. Eyecontact is also hugely important when it comes to sending him the right message. Make sure you meet his eyes whentalking to him and catch his gaze on the odd occasion, smiling seductively as you do so.Who are you?The harsh truth is this: if you don‘t love yourself, why should anyone else? Although lots of people will love you evenif you don‘t, your relationships will be much healthier and far more stable if you do. Try to work out what is stoppingyou from being confident, and then try to overcome these issues. If you have low body confidence taking up a sport isa good idea because it will make you think about your body differently. If you feel too shy, then push your boundariesby doing something new or something independently. Giving yourself some TLC is one of the best ways to get a guyand it will improve ever other area of your life too.Makeover your faceIf you want to be noticed by the man you‘ve been daydreaming about then take a look in the mirror. According toresearch, the structure of your face will indicate to guys how fertile and therefore how attractive you are. They citethat big eyes are a big bonus. If you‘re looking in the mirror now and think your eyes are microscopic, don‘t panic.What mother-nature has not given us, beauty products have. You can make your eyes stand out by wearing amoisturising eye cream, curling your eyelashes and wearing white eye shadow or an eye brightener product.
  • 27. Is honesty the best policy?According to Stephen Emlen, a researcher from Cornell University, honesty may not be the best policy if you‘vecheated on your past man. Emlen conducted a study that asked people to rate attributes in terms of how desirablethey found each trait. Apparently fidelity, along with good parenting and devotion, came out on top. So if you havecheated in the past, maybe it would be best to conceal the fact for a little while. Or if you have never cheated, dropinto the conversation how much you value fidelity.How to survive Valentine‘s Day when you‘re singleThe single person‘s guide to Valentine‘s DayEven for the happiest of singletons Valentine‘s Day can be a nightmare, with reminders oflove and romance hard to avoid. However, Valentine‘s Day needn‘t be just for couples. Tocelebrate your singledom and make the most of the day, check out these tips for enjoyingValentine‘s Day as a single guy or girl.Remember it‟s not the end of the worldWhile many of us dream of being swept off our feet and lavished with attention (and gifts) from an adoring partner, inreality it‘s important to retain some perspective and remember that it‘s not the end of the world if Valentine‘s Day is abit of a letdown on the romance front. OK, you may not have plans this Valentine‘s Day, but it is just another day onthe calendar after all, and there will be many more to come in which to score the perfect date.Treat yourselfIf you don‘t have anybody to spoil this Valentine‘s Day, why not take it as an opportunity to spoil yourself? Treatyourself to a bit of pampering, cook yourself a nice meal or have a relaxing bath with candles and a glass ofchampagne. With no one else‘s feelings to consider, you‘re free to spend the day doing whatever you want and tomake it a special day just for you.
  • 28. Don‟t get in touch with your exWith romance in the air and seemingly everyone coupled up, it is perfectly natural for your mind to drift to past loveson Valentine‘s Day, particularly if you are only recently single. However, although the temptation may be strong to getin touch with an ex, remember that setting yourself up for rejection and heartache is not going to improve your day.Give a friend a call and spend your valuable time and conversation on someone who will appreciate it instead.Take off the rose-tinted glassesIt‘s easy to feel jealous of those who are loved up on Valentine‘s Day. However, it‘s important to maintain someperspective and remember that no relationship is perfect and that the romance you see on Valentine‘s Day is notrepresentative of a day-to-day relationship. Rather than being envious of the relationships around you, remindyourself of all the things you don‘t miss about being in a relationship, and all the perks of being single you get toexperience now.Stop torturing yourselfSobbing into a bucket of popcorn as the credits roll on another romantic movie, wailing along to ‗All by myself‘ at thetop of your voice, or going over and over all the reasons your ex was definitely ‗the one‘ to your poor best friend…Does any of this sound familiar? And if so, is this really how you want to spend your Valentine‘s Day? Make a thresolution not to torture yourself this February 14 by listening to love songs, watching romantic movies or sittingabout reflecting on your failed relationships. Instead, get out there and do something fun!Spend time with othersJust because you are single on Valentine‘s Day that doesn‘t mean you have to spend it alone. Rather than moping athome, make plans to spend time with your family or friends doing something you enjoy. You could get the girls roundto watch DVDs, visit a family member you rarely get to see, or head out for cocktails with friends. After all, Valentine‘sDay is a day for spending time with those you love, whoever they may be.Kick-start a new romanceIf there‘s someone you‘ve got your eye on and you think they may be interested too, why not take Valentine‘s Day asan opportunity to express your interest? Send an old-fashioned anonymous card or just a flirty email and set thewheels in motion. Alternatively, sign up for online dating or look into other ways to find love, and let the thought of apotential new romance brighten up your day.Top 10 sexual fantasies10 of the naughtiest fantasiesHere are the 10 top sexual fantasies. We all do it, in fact 95 per cent of us fantasise everyday. So, to keep your naughty thoughts fresh check out this handy guide to raunchyfantasies:The exMaybe we love thinking of our ex because it‘s so wrong, or so out of reach; either way, it‘s a turn on and we all love it.Getting this fantasy right is all about anchoring it in reality. You need to visualize places where you and your ex usedto hang out, or things you used to do to one another. This way, your fantasy will feel like it could be a reality, which ishot, hot, hot.
  • 29. Lights, camera, actionMost people who don‘t like being centre stage in their day-to-day life love lots of attention in their dream world andthis is why being filmed during sex is such a popular fantasy. To make this fantasy good think about how you wouldlike to be filmed, what you‘d be doing and who you‘d be doing it with. Is anyone watching, or is this going to be aprivate tape for those lonely nights in?The copWho doesn‘t love a uniform? Combine that smart costume with a dominatrix-like attitude and bingo, you have onesaucy daydream. Handcuffs, batons and even a police chase can feature within your dream. To keep the cop ideafresh, you should sometimes switch roles and think about being the cop, or being the captured criminal.The clubIt‘s dark, there are lots of young hotties dancing around and then a stunning person walks up to you and... Well, youknow the rest. Getting it on in a club had to make it onto the top sexual fantasy list because pretty much everyonehas wanted to do it or, at the very least, everyone‘s thought about what it would be like.The strangerMany people would love to try no-strings-attached sex with a complete stranger, but most are too scared or wouldfeel way to guilty to give it a go. For that reason, this is perfect fantasy material. Choosing a gorgeous stranger whoyou‘ve spotted during the day is a great way to kick off this raunchy dream.The food fightFood and sex have always gone hand in hand, so it‘s no wonder that a food fight is one of the top seven fantasies. Ifyou love your food, then you can think about different types, like sweet and savoury. Plus picture different settings:picking fruit in Spain, in a sauna-like kitchen or even in a cafeteria. As always, variety is the key for this food fightfancy.
  • 30. The swimming poolThe swimming pool fantasy often features in big, Hollywood films and why wouldn‘t it? The thought of diving into abig, blue pool and finding your all time, number one guy or girl wearing very little and looking very good is alwaysgoing to be a huge turn on. This little fantasy will always hold some allure for people, which is why it‘s on our top 10sexual fantasies list.The teacherWhen you were at school, you hated it, but now you‘ve left, teachers keep popping into your dirtiest thoughts. Peoplemay love the teacher fantasy so much because of Britney and her Baby One More Time video, but we have a feelingthat people love this because of the authoritative role the other person can adopt.The threesomeIn reality, threesomes can be awkward incidents that are best forgotten, but in your dream world they can be a wholelot of fun. This is such a staple sexual fantasy because it is so easily interchangeable. You can have two guys, twogirls or one of both sexes. There‘s also endless kinky tricks you can try out in an orgy that would never work with atwo-person team.The peep showNot many people would actually like to fantasise about a peep show, but peeping at others who are having sexactually excites lots of people. You could think about watching people on screen, or people getting it on outside, likeat the beach or in a park. It‘s exciting because there‘s a chance you might get caught.5 foods that will turn you onYour guide to aphrodisiacsCan food turn you on? If you believe the legend that Casanova ate 50 raw oysters forbreakfast, it would seem that aphrodisiacs do work. So here‘s a guide to five of the bestlibido-lifting boudoir foods:CeleryCelery may not be exciting, it may not be appetising, but it is great for getting you excited. If you‘re throwing a party ortreating your date to a homemade dinner, serve them celery sticks with a sour cream or humus dip. This is the perfectpre-date snack because celery contains androsterone, an odourless hormone, which turns guys on. In turn, menrelease pheromones, which makes women feel more attracted to the celery chomping man. If you don‘t fancy celeryand dips, you could pop some celery into a salad or make a celery soup.Steak with a pine nut saladIf you are on a date, serve steak with a pine nut salad. Firstly most meat-eaters love steak, so even if your date isfussy they will still tuck into what you serve. Secondly, high-protein foods like steak increase alertness andassertiveness. This will mean that after the meal your date won‘t feel drowsy and will feel more confident aboutgetting what they want – you. Make sure you combine your steak with a pine nut salad though. Pine nuts, an ancientaphrodisiac, are high in zinc, which enables guys to make more sperm.
  • 31. CurryAnother great dinner to pick when on a date is curry. A UK study has shown that just thinking of your favourite spicydish is enough to increase both your heart and your blood pressure to a level similar to one reached during sexualarousal. For the guys, make sure you order a curry that uses the herb Fenugreek. According to a study, male libidoincreased by 28% when men ate Fenugreek. This is because the seeds are thought to increase the production ofhormones, such as testosterone.AniseedAniseed has been used as an aphrodisiac for years. The Romans and Greeks both believed it to be a powerfulconcoction. It is thought that just sucking on the seeds can make you feel aroused. Adding aniseed to a sauce forchicken or pasta is a great way to make use of the seeds. Aniseed is not to everyone‘s taste though. If you still wantto use aniseed as an aphrodisiac you can add the seeds to ice-cream or drink aniseed based cocktails. There areaniseed teas, aniseed sweets and aniseed liquors.StrawberriesDid you know that the Romans associated the seductive strawberry with Venus the goddess of love? Strawberriesare particular good for your sex life because they help out the adrenal gland, which produces hormones that stimulateorgasm. Stock up on these red fruits and you‘ll feel more stimulated in bed. You could pack a picnic and take
  • 32. strawberries, or if a picnic isn‘t for you, eat some vanilla ice-cream with fresh strawberries. The calcium content in atypical bowl (200 milligrams) can also make orgasms more powerful and intense.Dealing with ImpotenceWhat is impotence?In men, impotency is usually associated with erectile dysfunction (ED). It refers to the inability of a man to achieve ormaintain an erection sufficient for sexual intercourse. It includes the failure to achieve an erection when sexuallystimulated, as well as losing an erection prior to ejaculation.A difficult condition for the man to deal with, the root of this condition can be physical, psychological, lifestyle-basedor a combination of all three. However, a person suffering from ED might take comfort from the fact that it confrontsmen from all over the world and is seen in almost 50% of the male population in the age group of 40-60 years.Erectile Dysfunction is a curable condition and does not always imply total loss of sexual activity or desire. It doesn‘tnegate normal desire and often a person suffering from it may obtain an erection but is simply unable to maintain itfor the expected period of time.Causes of Erectile Dysfunction (ED)Contrary to popular belief, in 80 – 90% of the cases the cause is physiological and not psychological. Often, it is aphysical condition that could have been brought upon by an unhealthy lifestyle that might involve smoking, excessivedrinking, poor eating habits, medication and so on. Impotence could be caused due to insufficient flow of bloodthrough the penile arteries (arteriogenic), blood leakage from veins in the penis (venogenic), improperneurotransmission in the penis (neurogenic), hormonal imbalance or psychogenic (disorders resulting frommental/emotional turmoil) reasons.Diagnosing EDA diagnosis of ED or impotency is carried out by studying the patient‘s medical history, all the while scanning forpotential causes. This is followed by a physical examination and tests for diabetes, hormonal regulation andcardiovascular disease. There are also a variety of tests specifically to check whether the cause of the dysfunction isphysiological or psychological. For instance, a nocturnal penile tumescence checks to see if the patient is able tohave normal erections at night. If yes, then it‘s most likely that the cause is psychological.Treatment of EDCertain conditions (diabetes, hypertension, depression among others) and the drugs prescribed for their treatmentcan cause ED. Treatment of impotence varies from natural remedies and drugs like Viagra, Cialis or Levitra to sexualcounselling and psychotherapy to external vacuum devices, penile injections, hormonal replacement therapy andeven implants and microsurgery as advised by the physician.The most advised and natural way to avoid the condition is to live a healthier life. Exercising, weight control,wholesome diet, general body fitness and a healthy and active sexual life can prevent impotency as well as treat it.Kegel exercises, which are exercises focussed on the pelvic region, are known to help improve sexual health andtreat erectile dysfunction.―Not tonight honey‖ – The facts on female impotence
  • 33. What is female impotence?Female impotence deals with difficulties women face with sex. It is also referred to as sexual dysfunction. As againstmen, for whom impotence means an inability to get an erection or maintain it for the desired period of time, impotencein women includes low sexual desire, low arousal, difficulty or inability to reach orgasm and problems with lubrication.More than 40% of adult women encounter sexual dysfunction at some point in their life. These dysfunctions could bein the form of: Lack of sexual desire (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder or HSDD) Inability to progress through the normal phases of sexual arousal (Female Sexual Arousal Disorder or FSAD) Discomfort during intercourse and inability to achieve an orgasm (Female Orgasmic Disorder or FOD).Causes of female impotenceThere are usually two conditions leading to aversion to sex on the basis of physical pain or discomfort: dyspareuniarefers to extreme discomfort or pain in the genital area, particularly the vagina. This may be experienced before,during or after sexual intercourse. The other is called vaginismus; an involuntary contraction of the muscles aroundthe vagina that makes penetration during sex difficult.In general however, the causes for sexual dysfunction in women are widespread and proper treatment can only beprescribed after a detailed medical diagnosis. A lot of women sometimes face major pelvic surgeries, which may laterlead to some form of sexual dysfunction. Sometimes the hormonal changes brought about by the menstrual cyclesand menopause can cause impotency. Conditions like diabetes and hypertension have also been known to influencea woman‘s sexual health.Often, female impotence is caused by some traumatic experience or psychological reason that has created anaversion to sex. At times, social and religious pressures and personal relationships and marital problems create anon-sexual frame of mind that turns into a mental road block leading to sexual dysfunction. Unhealthy bloodcirculation and poor neurotransmission to a woman‘s vagina may be another cause of her sexual problems.Excessive smoking and drinking and conditions like hypertension, high cholesterol, poor arterial health, and weightproblems interfere with the natural behavior of the body and are potential factors for sexual problems.Treatment of female impotenceThere are a variety of treatments depending on the problem. Various natural remedies, holistic approaches andpsychotherapy have been applied with a measure of success. Additionally, oral medication, hormonal therapy andsurgical procedures are also used to treat impotency. All in all, one of the simplest and most effective steps that canbe taken towards avoiding such condition and even recovering from sexual dysfunction is to live a healthy life.Measures like maintaining a balanced diet, exercising, weight control andstress management help not just in curingimpotency, but also avoiding it.Do you fancy him?It‘s very possible you could be falling for someone right now and not even realise it. We‘ve all hadthat ‗D‘oh‘ moment when we realise we‘ve been trailing around after someone for months, withoutreally considering that they could be a potential love interest.Here are five signs that you‘re chasing him without knowing it – do any of them ring a bell?
  • 34. 1. You hang out with him constantly, on his termsIt‘s totally normal for girls to hang out with guys without being secretly in love with them. After all,lots of girls have their guy mates – gay or straight – who they love to spend time with, partly becausethey bring something different to the conversation and the social dynamic. But, don‘t confuse thatwith being surgically attached to a particular guy ‗mate‘, who you might have a crush on.If you find yourself volunteering to stand at the sidelines of his Sunday five-a-side match and handout oranges, or catch yourself thinking ‗Sure, I wouldn‘t mind seeing the latest Vin Diesel flick withhim‘ then you might just have a secret crush. Don‘t get us wrong – there‘s nothing wrong with thateither! Just don‘t let it go on ages before you take action. Too long and it‘s likely he‘ll have noticed;then the question becomes, why didn‘t he reciprocate?2. You bad mouth any woman he looks at/goes out withIs there one guy you know who never seems to go out with a woman who‘s good enough for him? Doyou find yourself telling your friends how he‘s such a great catch, and he seems to be hopeless atfinding a good woman? Or maybe you‘ve noticed him looking a woman in a bar and you can‘t resisttelling your friend what awful hair and make-up she has?Yes? Then maybe, just maybe, you should ask yourself why you‘re so protective over this friend. Ofcourse we‘ve all thought at some point that our friends could do better in the romance department,but not constantly. Consider whether you wish you were that woman he was looking at in the bar.3. You get annoyed when he doesn’t reply......to your text message, missed call, Facebook message and/or email. Ask yourself, if it was adifferent friend who‘d not replied to your text message, how would you feel? Would you get annoyedor would you just think ‗Oh well, she‘s probably busy‘? If you care that much about this blokereplying to your text, then you should wonder how deep your feelings run for him.4. You blow off a date to see himRain-checking a hot date because a bloke friend asked you over to watch The Apprentice final is apretty big ‗you‘re chasing him and you don‘t even know it!‘ sign. In fact, they don‘t get much clearerthan preferring to spend time in with him rather than out with another bloke.5. Talking about him all the timeThere comes a point when you like someone so much that you manage to squeeze them into everysentence you utter. ‗It‘s funny you say that because Dave had a pet hamster too...‘ or ‗Well, that‘snothing, Joe holds the world record for the biggest collection of bottle tops...‘ Similarly, this
  • 35. phenomenon also happens to people in the first flush of a relationship (when everything about theother person is fascinating) and after a break up (when they still want to believe the other person ispart of their life). If you‘re not sure whether this is you, count how many times you mention ‗him‘during the course of an evening with friends. It‘s also worth seeing how many times your friendseither roll their eyes or exchange ‗looks‘. If either number goes above two, you might need toconfront your feelings.Want to move in together? Read this before youtake the diveBefore you make the BIG move to live-in together. Here are a few things you must look into.Are we ready?So, you have been together for a while… and now, want to move in together. Go through our must-have conversations‘ list, before you take that step.Are you both on the same page?Why do you want to move in together? This is the first question you need to ask yourselves. Makesure you‘re both in it for similar reasons. If he‘s thinking it will help save rent money and for theother it is a step before you say ―I do‖, then there is bound to be trouble going forward. So, both ofyou put down your reasons for wanting to live together and see what comes out of it.Get a reality check!The initial few weeks are likely to be blissful. Waking up beside your sweetheart every morning, whoneeds anything more? But in reality, there‘s more to it than just that. Like everything else in life, yourrelationship too changes constantly. When you‘re living together, you‘re more likely to bear witnessto the ugly sides of each other — which you may or may not have been aware of.There are practical problems such as Who should use the bathroom first? Who makes the tea in themorning? So take all this into consideration before making that BIG MOVE. Both of you must have aserious chat about the possible changes, and whether you‘re ready for them.Work out the finances!Money can be one big SPOILER, which makes it a very important part of the decision makingprocess. This can be a big dampener, especially if one makes or spends more than the other. Check tosee where you guys stand with respect to finances. Do you want to merge your finances or keep itseparate? Be open and share your fears and anxieties about money.
  • 36. What might help is preparing a monthly budget and deciding who will put down how much eachmonth. See if you‘ll like to share expenses equitably or if you want to divide it as per individualearnings and expenditures. This could also be done in the form of a cohabitation agreement similarto a pre-nuptial agreement, where you decide how you‘ll share your expenses and who will pay forwhat.Make sure you work all of this out before you take the dive.Designate choresHe is your boyfriend not just your roommate, so you don‘t need to talk about who will do the dishesand laundry, right? WRONG! You might initially enjoy doing all the chores to please the otherpartner, but it is bound to get to you in a while.To avoid that — from the start –designate responsibilities. Make sure you‘re both aware of theresponsibilities and can meet them.Can you cope with small irritants?When you‘re sharing a living space, there will be many small irritants. Little things like a wet towelon the bed, or her leaving the water running while brushing her teeth – can be irksome, leading toconflict. Check with yourselves to see if you can cope with such conflicts. And also whether you‘rewilling to make changes to accommodate the other‘s point of view and needs.Future prospects.Well, you‘re moving in together now. So does this mean marriage is the next step? If so, in how muchtime. If marriage isn‘t on the cards, are both partners O.K. with it. These are some importantquestions you need consensus on before you move in together. Otherwise, it‘s likely to leave one orboth of you hurt and heartbroken in the end.Plan an exit strategy.Some might call this pessimistic, but it is wise to chalk out a plan in case one of you does not want tocontinue with the arrangement. It‘s important to acknowledge this possibility. Make sure you haveyour own savings account.This is also where a cohabitation or living-together agreement can be of most help. A cohabitationagreement not only helps organise day-to-day finances of living together, it is also helpful in case youwere to split. This agreement can help you do it as fairly as possible.
  • 37. No sex please, were married!SAYING no to your spouse’s request for sex could land you in far more trouble thanimaginable. The willful denial of sex, including on the first night after marriage byeither spouse, amounts to cruelty and can be a ground for dissolution of the marriage,declares a recent ruling by the Delhi High Court.Justice Kailash Gambhir pronounced this verdict while upholding the lower court’sdecree of divorce to man in a “sex-starved marriage” because his wife had refused tohave intercourse with him on the wedding night and made him long for what hewanted for five subsequent months. “Sex is the foundation of marriage and marriagewithout sex is anathema,” ruled Justice Gambhir.Anathema aside, the reality is that young couples these days simply aren’t willing tostay in relationships that lack sexual chemistry. “ The number of couples seekingdivorce based on sexual strife has nearly doubled in the last two decades. Sexualproblems existed then too, but people lived with them,” says divorce lawyer GurmeetNarula of Narula Associates.The doors of divorce lawyers aren’t the only ones that people with sexual complaintsknock. “ Sexual problems are as common as a common cold today and counselhundreds of couples whose married lives have hit rock bottom because of their poorsex lives,” says Dr Prakash Kothari, the country’s best-known sexologist and founder-adviser to the World Association for Sexual Health. “Hardly two or three people cameto the OPD in the 1980s when the Department of Sexual Health was started at the KEMHospital [Mumbai]. Today, we get at least 100 people, including young and middle-aged couples.” Rather than the women, it’s the guys who seem to be in trouble.Premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction are common problems, and womendrag their husbands to the sexologist as a last resort. “Women are walking out ofmarriages citing impotent husbands as a reason. Men also complain about their wives,saying that they are too preoccupied with their careers to find time for sex,” says DrKothari.Experts attribute sexual disharmony among urban couples to various factors. “Peoplehave put sex on the back burner. Couples come home late, one sleeps before the other,there is no interaction and sex becomes perfunctory. High stress levels, preoccupationwith careers, latenight partying, alcohol and smoking wreak havoc on the sex lives ofcouples,” says Dr Kothari.The intrusion of TV, Internet, mobile phones and the social media makes mattersworse.It’s not just young couples whose bedroom lives are lacklustre.
  • 38. The 2011 India Today-Nielsen Sex Survey reflects the sexual ennui that seems to begripping the entire nation. Sexual satisfaction, it found, has dipped to 27 per cent forthe first time in eight years of the India Today Sex Survey series. Making excuses toavoid sex is not just female prerogative though half the wives say, “ Not tonight, honey.I have a headache.” One third of husbands also fake a headache to avoid sex.BOREDOM with marital sex is a common complaint for both men and women. Over 48per cent husbands confess that their ideal bed mate is not their wife, and about 33 percent of the wives say that sex becomes unimportant after a few years of marriage.Seeking pleasure outside marriage is common.“There is a rise in extra-marital affairs because people don’t devote time and attentionto their marriages,” explains Dr Kothari. “They are too preoccupied with their careers,and finding a sexual partner at the workplace doesn’t seem like a bad idea for many.”Female emancipation has also affected bedroom politics. Women are more sociallyand economically independent, and aren’t easily deterred from walking out ofmarriages. “ Women aren’t willing to be viewed as sex objects any longer,” says DrPulkit Sharma, Clinical Psychologist, VIMHANS, Delhi. “They have their own sexualpreferences and want to express them.Sometimes they don’t want sex when their husbands do and they need to be respectedfor the choices they make,” Dr Sharma adds. But the men aren’t too happy about thissharing of power. “ Unlike earlier, when women would just hit the bed whenever aman wanted them to, now the ladies have a say,” says Delhi- based sexologist andrelationship counsellor Col. (Retd) V. K. Wadia. “ They say no when they don’t feel likesex and men cannot take it.”Some experts believe that the High Court ruling may encourage more couples withailing sex lives to take matters to court. But this may not be in their best interests, sayexperts. “ This kind of ruling can be misused,” says Dr Sharma of VIMHANS. “ Sexbetween two partners is a private affair and using a spouse’s refusal to have sex as aweapon in court isn’t a solution to the problem. A partner may not want sex due togenuine reasons like a medical problem, a history of abuse, sex phobia or even anxiety,which needs time to be dealt with. In such situations, a blanket ruling just wouldn’twork,” he adds.SEX must be viewed in the context of the social, economic and emotional relationshipbetween two people, say counsellors. If the relationship isn’t great in other areas,sexual satisfaction may be low. The amount of sex each couple needs also varies.“There can be no clear-cut rule that quantifies how much sex is essential for amarriage to survive. This is up to the partners to decide,” says Dr Sunil Mittal,Director, Delhi Psychiatry Centre. Rather than heading to the divorce court, solutionsmay be found from therapists. “ Couples shouldn’t shy away from seeking professional
  • 39. help,” says Dr Kothari.“Most sexual problems can be treated.” People need to remember this before rushingto get a divorce on the grounds of sexual compatibility.REFUSAL ON THE FIRST NIGHT IS QUITE COMMONSONAM and Arun have been married for the last five years. Both are MBAs who bringhome big cheques. But their problems started right from their wedding night, whenSonam refused to have sex with Arun.Theirs was an arranged marriage and the idea of getting physically intimate with Arunwithout knowing him properly made Sonam uncomfortable.Her refusal, however, became an issue in Arun’s head from the beginning.Eventually, Arun wanted sex every alternate day, but Sonam didn’t. They had a busywork life and barely spent time together. Sex took a backseat, resulting in numerousfights. Arun threatened to walk out of the marriage, which led them to seekingprofessional help. Commenting on the case, Dr Pulkit Sharma, Clinical Psychologist,VIMHANSDelhi, says: “Sex on the first night is not a great idea in an arrangedmarriage as a couple hardly know each other. Performance anxiety is always a part offirst time sex, so the wedding night may not be the right moment for this.”Guys, boost your sex driveYour guide to getting moreSex, sex, sex; it‘s all we think about, right? Although lots of people think us guys want sexconstantly, it‘s just not always true. However, although guys don‘t always want it, if you‘venot felt that urge in a while, or if your idea of a hot night is eating a fiery madras with mates,then maybe it‘s time you gave your libido a kick. With just a few tricks and changes to yourdiet you can turn yourself into a real-life Casanova and have a few more wild nights in underthe covers:Get some sunSunbathing isn‘t just for girls; if you want to increase your libido it‘s time you lathered on the sun screen and gotoutdoors. Recent research has shown that soaking up the sun‘s rays increases male testosterone levels. Accordingto studies, as doses of vitamin D increase, which is gained from sunshine, men‘s testosterone levels rise. Just onehour in the sun can significantly boost the male sex hormone.Get a takeawayIt always seems that everything that tastes fantastic is terrible for our health; it‘s either high in fat, high in salt or it hasa high GI level. However, although a pizza, some doughnuts or some popcorn may not be the healthiest of snacks,
  • 40. there are certainly some perks to indulging in some of these treats. A research team from Chicago found that thesmells from these foods in increased men‘s penile blood flow.Take a spinA Bugatti Veyron Super Sport, a Hennessey Venom GT and a McLaren F1; do these names get your heart racing?According to research, they should. Getting behind the wheel of a fast car gives you such a thrill that it makes thebody produce more testosterone. However, it‘s bad news for those guys who drive a banger. Driving an old car canactually lower your levels of the sex hormone. Perhaps that iconic, mid-life crisis sports car no longer seems like astupid buy.Have a kick aboutFed up of getting nagged because you play too much football? Well, here‘s a fail-proof excuse you can use next timeyou‘re getting hassled: football increases your libido. The beautiful game is said to boost testosterone and levels ofthe hormone is found to be highest if you are playing at home. Why not ask your girl to come and watch you play atyour next home match, then take her on a romantic date; you won‘t be able to keep your hands off her.Ice cream: the food of the sex GodsAlthough a bowl of ice cream may seem a little infantile, all men should grab a bowl every now and again. Vanilla icecream is a perfect concoction of sex fuel. The vanilla scent is a natural libido booster, which calms men and reducesinhibitions. The calcium content in a typical bowl (200 milligrams) can also make orgasms more powerful and intense.Next time you‘re out on a date, don‘t skip the deserts guys.Put down the bottleChatting up women can be terrifying, granted. But if you‘re looking to reignite your sexual desire, cut down on theamount of alcohol you consume, especially on those nights when you could potentially get laid. More than two unitsa day will lower your libido. A normal bottle of lager (330ml) contains 1 unit, whilst an average pint of cider (568ml)contains 2.8 units. Even a week of not drinking can increase your desire.RelaxYour mate got promoted over you, your team is facing relegation and your in-laws are coming to visit. Life is alwaysgoing to be stressful, but too much stress increases the hormone cortisol, which causes testosterone to dropdramatically. To combat additional stress visit a steam room. This will relax you and boost your blood flow; both inturn will increase your sex drive. In addition to this, eat foods containing tryptophan, like turkey.Valentine‘s Day dos and don‘ts10 things you should and shouldn‘t do this Valentine‘s DayWhether you‘re single or coupled up come February 14th, there are certain things youshould bear in mind to help the day go more smoothly. Check out these 10 dos and don‘tsfor Valentine‘s Day.Don‟t assume your partner shares your feelings about Valentine‟s DayIt‘s no secret that some people love Valentine‘s Day while others view it simply as a day designed to con us out of ourhard-earned cash. If this is your first Valentine‘s Day with your partner, it is important to find out which side they fallon. Different things are important to different people and, while your partner not being overly excited about this
  • 41. occasion is no indication of their feelings towards you, it may be helpful to discuss your hopes and plans forValentine‘s Day in advance so as to avoid disappointment and, if necessary, reach a happy compromise.Don‟t forget the date!No matter whether Valentine‘s Day scores high on your list of favourite dates or not, if it is important to the personyou care about then you should do your best not to forget it. Not only will forgetting about Valentine‘s Day potentially thupset and hurt your partner, but you may find that they bring it up every February 14 for years to come! To stay inyour partner‘s good books, set yourself a reminder of the day and make sure to keep the evening free.Don‟t get too swept up in the romanceOn arguably the most romantic day of the year it is easy to get swept up in the romance and say or do things younormally wouldn‘t. Shopping for a pair of earrings can easily turn into a spontaneous engagement ring purchase, or aromantic dinner could lead to an impromptu declaration of love. However, it‘s important to make sure you are reallysure before you change the dynamics of your relationship and that you haven‘t just got carried away with theromance.Don‟t get in contact with your exRomance is in the air, everybody is seemingly coupled up, so, for all you single guys and girls, it is perfectlyunderstandable that your mind may drift to love. However, although the temptation may be strong to get in touch withyour ex (or that guy you‘ve been unrequitedly lusting after), don‘t do it! No matter how lonely you are this Valentine‘sDay, we can guarantee that setting yourself up for rejection and heartache will not make your experience moreenjoyable. Instead, spend your valuable time and conversation on someone who will appreciate it, such as a familymember or friend.
  • 42. Don‟t overanalyse his giftUnlike men, women have a tendency to analyse every word, gift and gesture from their partner to decipher hiddenmeanings. However, it is important that, although it may be disappointing, you don‘t take a rubbish gift on Valentine‘sDay to heart. Just because he gives you a cheap and generic present it doesn‘t mean he is making a statement aboutyour relationship; in fact it may say more about his bank balance or feelings towards Valentine‘s Day than it doesabout you.Do shop with cautionAll the above said, guys, it‘s still important to try to put a little thought into your gifts to try to keep Valentine‘s Dayconflict-free. As a rough guide, avoid buying anything overly practical (Valentine‘s Day is not the time to buy her anew iron, no matter how much you think she wants it), and definitely avoid exercise equipment unless you want topotentially cause serious offence. Unless you‘re proposing marriage, anything that comes in an engagement ringshaped box is also out! Also, if you plan on buying some underwear or clothing, do make sure you know her dresssize.Do make it last all dayWhile most of us have work and responsibilities to attend to on Valentine‘s Day, it is possible to maintain the romancethroughout the day with minimal money and effort. To really make the most of the day, try not to keep celebrationsjust for the evening. Instead, get up a bit early and start the day with breakfast in bed, then send a quick text duringthe day (or slip a note in with their lunch) to let them know that you are thinking of them and looking forward to yourplans later.Do make reservations well in advanceValentine‘s Day is one of the busiest days of the year for most restaurants and DVD rental stores, so if you plan onheading out for a meal or renting a movie make sure you get in there early. Reserving a table a month in advance isperfectly acceptable – and often necessary – for Valentine‘s Day. Also, unless you are genuinely hard up, don‘t try to thget away with booking a table for February 15 to try save some money as this will probably not make the bestimpression on your partner.Do be creativeTo really avoid the crowds on Valentine‘s Day, it can help to think outside the box and plan something a little morecreative. A bunch of flowers and reservations for the best restaurant in town may have always been met withappreciation before, but to really surprise your partner try planning something a little less generic like a homemadegift or a picnic (you could even have this indoors if the weather is bad). Also, avoid using a tried-and-tested formulayou have used on other partners – make your other half feel unique and special with a date planned just for them.Do remember it‟s just one dayMany of us dream of having the perfect Valentine‘s Day where we‘re swept off our feet and lavished with attentionfrom an adoring partner. However, as lovely as this may be, in reality it may be best to keep things in perspective. Ifyou‘re single on Valentine‘s Day it is important to remember that it is not the end of the world if you haven‘t got plans– there will be many other days in the future to score the perfect date. If you are coupled up, it is equally important notto stress if things don‘t live up to expectations; bear in mind that your relationship is more important than just one day.Top 10 sex tips for Valentine‘s Day
  • 43. Treat your Valentine with these top tipsSpice up your Valentine‘s Day and drive the love of your life wild with these hot, sumptuoustips – you‘ll never be alone on the 14th of February again:Start your day with a messageAlthough cute, the Valentine card is somewhat old fashioned these days. A raunchy text, however, is not. Send yourcrush a kinky message in the morning. It can be something like ‗I really want you tonight.‘, or something more risquéand detailed; do what you feel comfortable with. Letting them know you‘re thinking about them in a sexual way is abig turn on, and they won‘t be able to stop thinking about you all day.Touch them somewhere newIf you want great sex the best way to impress your partner is to do things that no-one else has done for them. For thegirls, run your fingers down the side of your man‘s torso or down the joint between your man‘s legs and his groin.Grab his hair when kissing him and use your nails. For the guys, rub your girl‘s stomach, just above the pubic bone.The base of her spine and her feet are also highly sensitive areas that don‘t often get much attention.Dress upBondage, latex, frills and panties; there‘s a lot of kinky kit on offer. Lingerie can be expensive though so keep itsimple with some stilettos. If you can‘t walk very well in heels, don‘t worry. Just wearing them in bed is enough. Youcan turn up the heat by adding some sexy stockings or socks. Other simple yet effective props include wearingnothing but a simple leather belt, a necklace or a soaking wet t-shirt.Clean up your actSadly, much to our disappointment, Valentine‘s Day is not a public holiday. So, when you get home from work there‘sa chance that you both will be stressed and tired. To make sure your late-night bed fun does not get sidelined, take asteamy hot shower together. The heat will relax you both, plus it‘s hard not to get intimate when you‘re standing soclose together. You can also light a scented candle, use an invigorating shower gel or bring out the massage oil.Kiss their neckThe neck is very sensitive, but it is often overlooked during foreplay. If you want to get your Valentine in the mood askthem to lie on their front. Start by kissing their neck with gentle pecks. If you hear their breathing quicken then youcan kiss more intensely, mixing up the speed and pressure. If they seem to be enjoying this attention, then you cantake this a step further by whispering something naughty in their ear or kissing their earlobe.Get a wigIf you‘ve been with your man for a while, or if you lack confidence in bed, then a wig may be the perfect Valentine‘sgift for you. Try on different styles and see which one you like. Try to choose something that is different to yournatural hair. So if you have long blonde hair, pick a wig that is short and dark. Taking on a new identity can make sexmore exciting for both of you – especially if you keep it a secret and surprise your man with it.Get out the apronThe promise of good food has always been an easy way into another‘s heart; and an easy way into their bed. Somefoods that will get them in the mood include: peaches, bananas, pine nuts, mussels, eels, horseradish, asparagus,cucumbers, and onions. For dessert choose truffles, strawberries or chocolate. Don‘t fancy cooking? Take your datefor a curry. The heat will increase their heart rate to a level similar to one reached during sexual arousal.
  • 44. Ride himOften the guys go on top, so make your sex hotter than ever this Valentine‘s Day by riding him instead. To makethings even kinkier wear a skirt or dress during sex. Then, when you‘re on top you can flash him. He‘ll love not beingable to have you completely and you‘ll love seeing him getting turned on. When your girl is on top, make sure you tryto hold eye contact with her for long periods of time. This prolonged eye contact will give you both intense orgasms.Photo shootWe all know that guys love to look at naked girls, but it turns out women like a cheeky photo too. To make thisValentine‘s memorable, visit a professional photographer and get them to take some seductive snap shots of you.Make sure they are credible first. If you‘d prefer you can go with your partner and have pictures taken of you both. Ifyou choose to go alone, once the photos have been developed you can hide the pictures in places that only yourcrush will find.Go shoppingShopping may not sound like the best way to turn each other on, but lingerie shopping will get you both off. Chooseshops you are comfortable going into and don‘t take it too seriously. If you‘re feeling nervous just imagine what theitems will look like on. To make this shopping trip a little raunchier take your guy into the changing room with you.Obviously check with the shop assistants first. He‘ll love seeing you dress up somewhere new.4 Things to Eat Daily for a Better Sex LifeYou might be the most acknowledged alpha male in your circle of friends but thisdoesn‘t mean that you will never suffer from periods of lowered libido.Given our hectic schedules and the increasing industrial/environmental pollution we arebeing subjected to, our sexual health is bound to suffer at some time. Thus, it makessense to read about foods that can be eaten regularly to ensure that you continue to rulethe bedroom.1. Wal(nuts)—The Pun Is Not Intended, The Nourishment Is!You might have read through reviews that insist upon a daily dose of nuts to keep youhealthy. Well, walnuts take the cake when it comes to taking care of your sexual health.Walnuts are fortified with high amounts of arginine—this particular compound ensuresthat your erection is sustained longer and the penile tissues remain nourished. Whenyou are aroused, neurotransmitters of the brain send a signal to the inner linings of thegenital tissues, causing expansion of the blood vessels. This expansion is caused byrelease of Nitric Oxide from the blood vessels. Thus, you need nitric oxide in copious
  • 45. amounts to be rock hard and rock your woman and arginine is the main amino acidrequired for synthesizing Nitric Oxide.2. Tastiest Antioxidants On Our Planet: Dark Grapes & DarkChocolatesAll the body cells, including those present in the sexual organs, are damaged by theaction of free radicals that attack our immunity with every passing minute. To neutralizetheir harmful action, we need compounds to prevent the oxidation caused by them. Thisfunction is best performed by antioxidant-rich colored fruits and veggies. However,Dark Chocolates and Dark Grapes are perhaps the tastiest, most easily available sourcesof antioxidants. Enriched with flavonoids, these foods prevent thickening of blood also,ensuring better circulation in the genitals.3. Heard of Sex Minerals? Yes, They Exist In Some Common FoodsRobust sexual health requires many minerals and vitamins but none can compete withZinc in terms of its pronounced effect. Zinc affects nearly every aspect of your sexualand reproductive health, including potency, fertility and libido. It can be the difference-maker between being sexually active and a sexual powerhouse. Zinc is found in highproportions in bodybuilding supplements since more testosterone is needed for gainingmuscle. Your ejaculation volume and sexual stamina too is defined by your zinc intake.Good sources of zinc include lean meats, cashews, peanuts and sesame seed oil (oil ofTil).4. Foods For Better Prostate Health: Soy & CabbageIt is an established fact that prostate infections and inflammations can severely affectthe ability of men to have and sustain erections apart from dampening their ejaculation.Prostate problems are very hard to diagnose for the first few years and most men realizeit when they have progressed to the stage of using steroidal medications or surgery.Thus, it is better to take care of your prostate health by eating whole grain foods such aswhole grain rotis and bread, particularly those that contain rye flour, i.e. ragi ka atta.These food items contain plant biochemicals that prevent swelling and infection ofprostate. A small amount of soy and cabbage if eaten regularly can prevent the harmfuleffects of dihydrotestosterone—a metabolite of testosterone that is linked
  • 46. 7 Awesome Ways to ProposeYou‘ve met the girl of your dreams, you are truly, madly, deeply in love with her and youcannot wait to pop the question.But what is stopping you is the fact that you have no idea HOW to propose to her.If the above is the situation you find yourself in, then this article is written just for you.After much deliberation I have come up with a list of the 7 Most Amazing Ways in whichyou can Propose to your girl. I hope you find one that you can recreate and get your girlto say yes!1. Design a web pageThis one is an out-of-the-box method quite in sync with today‘s technology drivenworld. Get a web designer to design a web page for you which consists of your photostogether, maybe a poem you‘ve dedicated to her, the imagery of a place you want to orhave gone together to and the works. Create an online memoir which will remind her ofall the wonderful things you‘ll have done together and why you are THE ONE for her.Send her the link to the page once it‘s ready and await her positive reply.2. A one-day picnicGo away for a one day picnic. Start with a romantic early morning drive to eventually goto a fun / adventurous theme park or a romantic resort – whichever setting she‘d prefer.
  • 47. Spend quality time with her away from the mad rush of the city and be extra kind, lovingand generous to her. Today is the day you got to let the love flow freely and let her knowjust how much you love her. On the drive back halt the car at a random location andcompletely out of nowhere flash the ring. She will be surprised to say the least and willbe too delighted to say anything but a yes!3. Gather family / friends for dinnerOne way to seal the deal is to do it in the presence of loved ones. Show your ‗homelygood boy‘ side by organising and hosting a dinner for family and friends. You don‘t haveto necessarily tell them the reason behind this get together. When you are sure that noone is in on your plan, and you find everyone immersed in conversation & having a galatime, grab their attention and pop the question. Surprise them, surprise her and whatwill follow is a flurry of emotions, hugs, tears and congratulations!4. A ‘proposal’ huntGet creative and adventurous by planning a ‗proposal‘ hunt. Plan your clues in advanceand let one clue led to another till the last one finally leads to you standing there with aring in one hand and a rose in the other. Once the preparations are in order, drop thefirst clue on her like a bomb and keep at it till she reaches her destination - YOU! Don‘tmake the hunt too long or complicated, as she might lose interest. Keep it simple andpatiently wait for her to accept the ring and fall in your arms.5. Do a Chandler!All F.R.I.E.N.D.S. aficionados will know how Chandler wanted to propose to Monica.Lead her to believe that you don‘t want to get married anytime soon, that in fact you arebeginning to question the institution itself and that you probably would never want toget married. Lead her astray so that she is saddened by your confessions but notcompletely disheartened. Play along for a day or two, and then the following nightdecorate her room with candles, balloons and keep champagne at ready. Once she walksin, get down on one knee and propose. She will be surprised, shocked, teary eyed andvery very happy all at once.
  • 48. 6. Dinner / Romance / WineThough done time and again, this one never goes out of fashion. Plan a romanticeveningwith her. Book a table at an expensive restaurant, order the best wine, andarrange for live romantic music to be played. Ask her for a dance before the main coursearrives and pop the question. The ambiance thus created should be such that she simplycannot refuse.7. Heartfelt wordsIf you have decent writing skills then write poems for her. Send her one poem and abouquet of flowers each day of the week and with each passing day let the romancebuild. On the 7th day, meet her in person and hand her a bouquet. Then talk freely &express your true emotions for her. Tell her how happy she would make you by agreeingto your proposal and how ‗she completes you‘. Use words as your weapon of choice andslay her with your wit, charm and honesty. She simply won‘t be able to refuse.Hope these suggestions have eased your dilemma. Use one of these ideas and ask yourgirl out and she will surely yes!7 things that make you terrible in bed
  • 49. How to make your sex betterNeed some tips on being better in bed? Then look no further than this lesson in love. Avoidthese seven things that make you terrible in bed and you‘ll soon be a sex champ:Tear jerker moviesWhat do you do for date night? If you tend to ditch the action movies and the raunchy flicks for soppy, tear jerkers likeThe Lion King, maybe you‘ve found the root to your sexual problems. Sad or violent films can turn people off becausethey make you stressed, anxious and less aroused. Watching something hot and erotic will do the opposite and getyou in the mood. Next date night, rent movies like The Secretary or American Pie.Your bossEver wondered why men have more wet dreams on the weekend? Okay, so in part it‘s because of that extra long liein, but it‘s also because everyone‘s stress levels tend to decrease when they are away from the office. Stress is thenumber one, all-time nemesis to good, passionate sex. So next time you think you‘re underperforming in the boudoirconsider booking some time off from the nine to five slog.
  • 50. Skipping the gymSwapping your lycra for your lounge pants may sound like a great plan, but skipping your date with the cross-trainercould be making you terrible in bed. If you skip regular exercise your sex drive is lower, your self-confidence may beaffected, plus you miss out on that great mood enhancer you get after being active. Researchers found that men whoexercise for one hour three times a week have improved sexual function, more sex and better sexual satisfaction.SmokingSmoking makes you stink. That much is obvious. What you might not have known though is that smoking alsohinders the body‘s blood flow, and therefore makes you less sensitive. For the guys who smoke, be warned, yourerections won‘t be as good. For the ladies, you may find it more difficult to have that blinding orgasm and you mayeven want sex less. Extinguish the cigarette, not your love life.
  • 51. Your petThought your dog was your best friend? Think again. That pooch might be the reason you can‘t satisfy your guy orgirl. According to Dr. Herbenick a dog can change people‘s sleep cycle, which can affect their sex life. Also, havingyour dog or cat watching you in bed can be a big turn off. A surprisingly high number of people state that their petsregularly put them off getting intimate and ruin the mood for them and their partners.CoffeeYou may need a pick-me-up in the morning, but if you want to impress in the bedroom guys you should skip yourcoffee fix and opt for a less pungent energy boost. Coffee is one of the things that make your semen taste bad. Otherthings to avoid are: garlic, onions and red meat. However, for the girls coffee may not be such a bad thing. Accordingto a US study coffee could help boost women‘s sex drive.Your phoneShockingly, one third of respondents in a TeleNav study said they would give up sex for a week rather than theirphones. If you‘re one of these techno geeks then just take a minute to consider how your phone habits affect yourlove life. As soon as you get a new message through you‘ll be tempted to read it. As soon as that email arrives, youwon‘t be able to relax. Make sure you silence your phone before it silences your night of passion.7 things that are stopping you from getting enough sexTop 7 turn-offsWhat‘s stopping you from getting enough sex? Is it your diet, your attitude or the length ofyour finger? Take a look at these tips and before long you‘ll be out of your love rut andsurrounded by potential bed buddies:PartyingWe all like a drink after a long, hard day, but did you ever consider that your evening beverage is affecting that otherlong, hard thing in your life? Drinking too much reduces your sex drive, so if you want more loving it‘s time to putdown your glass. For the guys, you shouldn‘t be having more than three to four units a day. That‘s the equivalent oftwo pints of 4% lager. For the girls, you should have no more than two to three units in a day. That‘s the equivalent oftwo small 125ml glasses of wine.Checking their messagesA little green-eyed jealousy lives within us all and sometimes it can be quite flattering to hear we are the cause ofanother person‘s envy; but beware. Jealousy is the all time, number one turn-off for both men and women. Beingpossessive isn‘t hot, it‘s just weird. If jealousy is affecting your love life you should address some of your trust issuesand try to build your self-esteem. Before asking about your crushes exes, or rifling through their messages, pauseand think: what do I expect to find? Is this rational?
  • 52. RoutineLike everything else in life, if you do something too much it becomes boring. If your sex life has become moremonotonous than a Monday morning commute, it‘s time to experiment. If the kinky and saucy intimidates you, don‘tworry. Sex doesn‘t have to be sordid to be exciting. Try simple things, like a sex treasure hunt. Wait until your partnercomes home and place clues around the house. The clues should help them find you naked and in bed. When theydo finally find their prize (you) the anticipation will be so high you‘ll both want to dive into bed for some fun.Short fingerHow long is your ring finger? How long is your index finger? Although your hands seem an odd place to look whentrying to work out why you aren‘t getting enough sex, some scientists believe that the length of your ring fingerindicates certain information about your sex drive. The higher the level of testosterone you are exposed to in thewomb determines how long your fourth finger is. This is why men tend to have longer ring fingers than women.However, if you or your partner has unusually short ring fingers then this could indicate a low libido and could be whyyou are not getting enough.SmokingSmoking could be the reason why you aren‘t getting enough sex. In a survey three quarters of 18-24 year olds saidthey wouldn‘t even kiss someone who had just smoked. An even more shocking stat is that 1,700 people surveyed bythe Department of Health said they would be hesitant to start a relationship with someone who smoked. Clearly,smoking carries a huge stigma and it‘s no longer sexy to spark up. To get more action, you need to stub out thatcigarette.Relationship crisisAlthough make-up sex can be great, if you and your guy or girl are constantly fighting or live together in frostysilences then the chances are, your sex life sucks. A relationship crisis is one of the most common reasons why
  • 53. people have a loss of sexual desire. The best way to tackle any relationship issues you share is to talk to oneanother. Why are you both so unhappy? You need to work together to bring about a resolution and if you can‘t, thenmaybe it‘s time to move on.JunkIf you love gorging on junk food, you may only need to make a few small changes to your diet to make massivedifferences to your sex life. For those guys who would like to be a little firmer in the trouser department you should tryto eat foods rich in L-Arginine. You could have some granola for breakfast or snack on cashews and walnuts duringthe day. For the ladies, try and get more soy into your diet. It will make you more sensitive and lubricated, plus itcombats certain symptoms of the menopause.5 of the biggest sex iconsThe hottest women of all timeHere is a list of the five biggest female sex icons of all time. These women aren‘t just hot orpretty or busty. They have something else; oodles of raw sex appeal. Take a browse andread about the women who have shaped our fantasies and our views on sex and attraction:Sex icon 1: Marilyn MonroeHow could the woman who fronted the first ever issue of Playboy and told interviewers that ―sex is nature‖ not end upon our big sex icons list? Marilyn Monroe was sexy, funny and charismatic – yet more importantly, she made it allseem effortless. Yet despite being openly sexual and posing naked in shoots, she actually had problems reachingorgasm. After some sexual therapy, however, Marilyn was cured and told her doctor: ―Bless you doctor. Think of alight switch with a rheostat control (dimmer). As you begin to turn it on, the bulb begins to get bright, then brighter,and brighter and finally in a blinding flash is fully lit. It is so good... Doctor, I worship you."Sex icon 2: Pamela AndersonPamela Anderson has been a sex icon and dominated the blonde bombshell look for nearly two decades now –having a much lengthier shelf life than most in the business. Due to the length of Pamela‘s career she holds therecord for most appearances on Playboy‘s cover and has graced the screens of many popular TV shows and films;from Baywatch and Home Improvement to Borat and Days of Our Lives. Although Pamela still models she alsocampaigns for charities and recently bought Vivienne Westwood a rather unusual birthday gift – 70 acres of theAmazon rainforest. It would seem that this first-class pin-up girl has a great heart as well as a great body.
  • 54. Sex icon 3: Bettie PageFor a girl born in 1923, Bettie Page was quite the trendsetter. With her trademark black hairdo (a style that Beyoncemimicked in her ‗Telephone‘ video with Lady Gaga) Bettie Page became one of the first fetish models, using whipsand spiked heels to give her shoots a sexy edge. Bettie appeared in many men‘s magazines and got her break whenshe became the centerfold model for Playboy. This appearance in the January issue opened many doors for Bettie.She was crowned ―Miss Pin-Up girl of the World‖ and gained the nickname Girl with the Perfect Figure. Yet, despitebeing the star of many men‘s fantasies, Bettie Page still believed that sex was about love and romance, stating: "Sexis a part of love. You shouldnt go around doing it unless you are in love".Sex icon 4: Jennifer AnistonIt‘s true to say that, in this list, Jennifer Aniston does look a little out of place. She seems more like the girl next doorthan the girl on the centerfold pages. Yet Jennifer does ooze sex appeal. Despite the fact that she maintains asqueaky clean persona and rarely flashes her body, she has achieved a sophisticated and yet seemingly attainablesex status. Men ogle her and women admire her, even though her clothes remain on and filthy sex tape scandalshave never blemished her career. So why is she so hot? It may be, in part, to do with Jennifer‘s personality. Althoughshe‘s had her fair share of bland roles, Aniston is funny, down-to-earth and, although good looking, it‘s Jennifer‘spersonality that wins all of our hearts and makes her one of the sexiest women in the world.Sex icon 5: Dita Von TeeseDita Von Teese is the modern day pin-up queen who has fronted the revitalization of burlesque. Since she was ateenager, Dita Von Teese was fascinated by the raunchy world of burlesque and collected vintage lingerie. Thisfascination led her to become a stripper aged 19, and since then she‘s been leading audiences through a sexualshow of fantasy and discovery. Dita‘s most well-known act is a strip-tease dance followed by her bathing in aSwarvoski encrusted martini glass; an act developed for her role as the global ambassador for Cointreau. Thesedays, Dita can earn up to $50,000 for a single performance and there‘s a reason – she has captured ourimaginations. Dita Von Teese has earned her place on this list for her skills in seduction and her creative approach tothe world of sex, glamour and sexuality.5 innocent items that will spice up your sex life
  • 55. Items that will improve sexDoes the idea of going into an adult store make you blush? If you could never bear to buysome of the kinkier products that have hit the sex market in recent years, but do want tospice up your sex life, then this list is perfect for you. Each item will make sex better for youand your guy or girl, yet no-one will ever know their true, sexy purpose:A tent will improve your sex lifeWe all know that vacation sex is incredible, but sadly not all of us can afford to jet across to our favourite destinationevery weekend just so we can enjoy some under the sheets fun. However, most of us can afford a tent. Although atent doesn‘t sound like the most romantic place to get it on, once inside you‘re in a totally new environment. Thisshould kick you and your partner out of any love rut that you‘ve stumbled into. Plus, once you start getting intimatewith one another you‘ll be amazed how steamy it becomes inside. As the tent heats up you and your partner willbecome slick and slippery, which is perfect for a hot, fiery sex session. And if you‘re not a camping kind of person,why not just stick up the tent in your living room?A camera will improve your sex lifeAlthough you may never openly admit it in polite company, everyone likes to send the odd naughty picture. However,most of us tend to use our phones to send them. To put some of the romance and surprise back into kinky snaps, buya camera. When you use a camera there‘s more chance that you‘ll actually print off the pictures. Then once you‘vegot your picture you can surprise your partner by popping it in an unexpected spot, like the person‘s purse or on theirmirror. The element of surprise will catch your guy or girl off guard and will turn them on so much more. When theynext see you they‘ll be desperate to get your clothes off. A camera is also good because they have lots of settingsthat will help you take a flattering shot.
  • 56. A motorbike will improve your sex lifeObviously, you‘ll need to have the appropriate license before you jump onto a Harley, but a motorbike is a great itemto consider if you want to really shake up your love life. Every man who rides a motorbike gets that macho, JohnWayne feeling; whilst every woman loves the thrills and vibrations she receives from the bike. A motorbike will alsogive you both an incredible adrenaline rush. When your adrenaline levels rise your body becomes super sensitiveand increases your ability to be aroused. This means that you‘ll be more likely to have sex and when you do get it onyour body will be much more responsive. If a motorbike isn‘t for you, you can raise your adrenaline levels by riding arollercoaster or exercising.
  • 57. Some salmon and dark chocolate will improve your sex lifeNext time you‘re shopping for food make sure you stack up on salmon and dark chocolate. In the world of foodsalmon is a sexual powerhouse and can do wonders for your sex drive. Not only is this tasty fish full of mood boostingOmega 3 oils, but the vitamins in salmon boost your libido. As well as bulking up your sex drive salmon can alsoincrease the blood flow to your genitals, which makes them more sensitive. The next item that should go into yourshopping bag is dark chocolate. This tasty treat contains the stimulant phenylethylamine – the love drug.Phenylethylamine quickens your heart and fools you into thinking you‘re falling in love. Like salmon it also makes youmore sensitive.Heels will improve your sex lifeIf buying a lacy corset and a push-up bra is not your thing, but you still want to dress up a little to spice up your sexlife, buy a pair of high heels. Wearing heels makes you feel more confident and this boost will make you feel moreopen in bed. You may even want to try some new positions. Not only do heels make you feel sexier, they make youlook sexier too. High heeled shoes make your legs instantly look long and slender. To make the most of your newfound legs, make sure you moisturise beforehand. You could even add some shimmer dust to give them an attractivesheen. Also buy a pair that flatters your skin tone.Seven things you should never say to your partnerThe worst things you can say to your other halfSometimes our secret thoughts just slip out in a clumsy splutter of word vomit, and boom –we‘re in the doghouse again. We present you with seven things you should never say toyour partner. Ignore this at your peril.What not to say, rule 1: “My ex used to do that too!”Whether you‘re complimenting your partner, or highlighting a less than favourable flaw, comparing your currentpartner to an ex is not, under any circumstances, a good idea. Telling your other half how a former flame used to giveexcellent foot massages, or even a catty comment about their awful dress sense, will not go down well with yourlady/gentleman friend and is a recipe for disaster as your other half wonders why this ex is on your mind in the firstplace. Next time you experience boyfriend or girlfriend déjà vu, do yourself a favour and keep it on the down-low.
  • 58. What not to say, rule 2: “Don‟t you think [insert relevant name] is pretty/handsome?”This question is just plain annoying and sets your partner up in a lose/lose situation, which is a recipe for disaster.There are plenty of conversation starters out there that can be used without having to resort to this, so avoidquestions based on other people‘s looks. The first trap you set up for your partner with this question is if theydisagree with you. We‘ve all done it; they disagree and you brand them as a liar and say you wouldn‘t have minded ifthey agreed with you in the first place (Pfft, of course they can say that someone else is attractive – you‘re not thatinsecure!). The second major pitfall that your partner runs a high risk of falling into is agreeing with you. ‗Yes‘ theysay, ‗she/he is gorgeous‘, and boom – they‘ve been figured out. You knew they fancied this person all along. Mindgames aren‘t a good recipe for a successful relationship, so avoid them at all costs.What not to say, rule 3: Don‟t drool over the opposite sexSome people don‘t struggle with an answer when asked if they think someone else is attractive. If you do findsomeone of the opposite sex good-looking take a moment to gather your thoughts before you start panting inagreement with your partner‘s passing comment. When asked if you think a member of the opposite sex is attractive,it‘s often a plea for attention or reassurance neatly disguised as an innocent question. Yep, this is an invitation for youto gush to your lover about how much hotter he/she is, so be tactful with your reply. Try something along the lines of―She/he is alright, but they‘ve got nothing on you‖. Oh you little charmer!What not to say, rule 4: “Can we wrap this sex session up? [Insert favourite TV show] is on infive”This one is self-explanatory. Having their sexual performances ranked below a TV programme can lead to severefeelings of inadequacy for your other half. Even if you have been desperately waiting to find out what happens in thenext instalment of your favourite programme, just beware of the trouble this could cause if you express your thoughtsout loud. Cutting off a sex session is a big time deal breaker.What not to say, rule 5: “I‟m fine”, when really you‟re notThe classic passive-aggressive comment ―I‘m fine‖, when you‘re clearly annoyed that your other half has justswitched channels without asking your permission first, creates all sorts of trouble for ten minutes time. As you sitthere wallowing in your own little bubble of anger, you feel the tension building in the air and you‘re both just sat there
  • 59. waiting for the other person to talk to break the stressful atmosphere. By the time you get around to actually solvingthe first problem, you‘ve created a whole string of others by being in such a mood in the first place. You‘ve both saidthings you didn‘t mean and now you‘re just in a tangled web of problems that could easily have been avoided. Whenasked if you‘re okay, use this is an opportunity to outline what‘s bothering you, not a chance to feel sorry for yourselfand create a drama.What not to say, rule 6: “Do you think it‟s wise to eat that?”Asking your lover if they really think it‘s wise to be eating the chocolate smothered doughnut that is about todisappear into their mouth is a bad move by anyone‘s standards, particularly if your partner is female. It‘s basically asugar-coated version of the phrase, ―You‘ve put on weight, stop eating junk‖. If you have uttered either of thesephrases, duck now. Leave the house. Don‘t ever return.What not to say, rule 7: “What are you thinking riiight... NOW?”It‘s a question that some of us like to hurl at our partners when they‘re least expecting it. We say it so fast that ourother half doesn‘t have the chance to make up a false reply or even to think straight, which leads him/her to stutter,and then we accuse them of thinking of their ex or having rude thoughts about someone else. The chances are, theywere just pondering what they‘re having for tea or how to tackle a difficult situation at work, but when put on the spotthey can‘t really remember what they were thinking, let alone put it into a coherent sentence. Even if they did happento be thinking of having sex with a porn star or getting back with an ex, the last thing they‘ll do is admit it so this willnever really be a constructive question unless they answer ―thinking of you‖, but then we‘d probably tell them they‘relying anyway. Our partners simply can‘t win.5 qualities that men look for in womenThe ladies‘ guide to impressing modern menOh, how relationships have changed since the romance of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet.Here are the most popular qualities that modern men look for in women:Female quality 1: She has a life of her ownSay ‗cheerio‘ to the helpless heroine from classic literature, and ‗well, hello!‘ to the contemporary independentwoman. It‘s important to show that you‘re self-sufficient when you‘re trying to impress a man, and it‘s equally asimportant to maintain this when you‘re in a relationship. The average modern man doesn‘t want a lady to be clingingonto him all the time – it makes him feel suffocated. Rather than ditching your friends and family to spend time with anew love interest, make sure you keep separate plans in your diary at all times. Never feel as though you wouldn‘thave a life if this person wasn‘t in it; get out there and show that you have a vibrant lifestyle aside from him. Arelationship should enhance your life, not rule it.Female quality 2: She is honest and loyalBe honest with your love interest. If you tell them that a) you‘re married and going through a particularly difficultdivorce; b) you have a strange obsession with feet; or c) anything else that could potentially make them run for thehills, then you‘ve done the right thing. Okay, maybe hold back on option b for now, but you see what we‘re getting at.Anything that they may find out further down the line and could put them off should be made clear from the outset, oryou risk wasting the time of you both. Don‘t sugar-coat anything – if this man likes you enough, he will want to helpyou through difficult situations rather than leaving you to it. If either you or your love interest can‘t accept the truthabout one another‘s past or present lives, you shouldn‘t think about getting together because you won‘t be able tolook to the future.
  • 60. Female quality 3: She looks after herselfThis is one thing that hasn‘t changed since the days of our most distant ancestors; men like a woman who takes apride in her appearance and vice versa. We‘re not talking about being a tall, slim supermodel – it‘s not all about looks– but a little primping and preening here and there goes a long way. There‘s no need to dress up in a ball gown andtiara for a date, but do wear something that accentuates your fantastic figure. Wear makeup to highlight your naturalfeatures; style your hair to compliment your face; and spritz on your favourite scent to boost your confidence – hellogorgeous! Styling yourself to make you feel your best leads to a more confident you and that‘s another trait that menlook for in women.Female quality 4: She is self-confidentGone are the days when the timid damsel in distress attracted the handsome, strong man; nowadays, being needyattracts little more than a few raised eyebrows. Despite coming across as confident, rarely do the celebrities you seein the media feel as bold and confident as they look. It‘s all about faking it. Instead of zoning in on your weaknesses,develop and maximise your strengths to put you in the right frame of mind. Make sure you use your body language toyour advantage, as this can help you to fake confidence when really you might prefer it if the ground were to swallowyou up. Stand tall, make eye contact, and smile, for an instantly more confident you.Female quality 5: She is mature and well-spokenBaby talk can be cute but don‘t use it too often, sugar bunny. Your average modern man likes his woman to be ableto hold down an intellectual conversation as well as having a good sense of humour, and cutie-overload could put himoff. Talk about interesting topics and be sure to listen to him as well as inputting your own thoughts and ideas into theconversation. Hold back on slang words for your first few dates and avoid swear words too, as they come across asuncouth.It is a truth universally acknowledged that a modern man looks for different qualities in a woman than he may havedone in the 1800s and – whilst no man is ever the same and may look for different qualities in a woman – it‘s a goodidea to take these tips on board to boost your dating potential.7 things women do that drive men mad
  • 61. Irritating female habits that annoy menWomen complain about us a lot. Whether we‘re caught adjusting our bits or we‘re making amess, one thing we seem to be good at is doing things wrong. As much as we love themthough, they annoy us too. Get ready for an uncensored whinge about women:Annoying female habit 1: Making an anniversary out of everythingWhat is it with women turning the nice little things in life into a grand gift-exchanging, champagne-popping ceremony?We return home from a normal day at work to be met with a candle-lit dinner and an expensive looking gift but, quitefrankly, it makes our heart stop. Have you done something wrong? Is it your birthday? My birthday? Oh silly me, it‘sthe anniversary of the first time we looked at each other. Please refrain from doing this, ladies. We have a hardenough time getting event dates right without being shouted at for not buying the dog a card to celebrate theanniversary of his first vaccination.Annoying female habit 2: Piling the bed with cushionsOne would be mistaken for thinking that a bed is for sleeping in. We go to get our head down for the night, only to findthe bed piled sky-high with strategically placed cushions that leave no room for us. What‘s more, only a couple ofthese cushions actually have a purpose. We don‘t need the tiny heart-shaped one or the big fluffy one that makes ussneeze – just a normal pillow to rest our head on will suffice. We don‘t adorn the bed with DIY tools and model cars,so please tame your OCD (Obsessive Cushion Disorder) and stop making an elaborate display out of our bed so wecan get down to the important stuff.Annoying female habit 3: Asking us what we‟re thinkingIt‘s a classic example of how women like to test us, and possibly trick us into making the cardinal sin of admitting thatwe weren‘t thinking about her at that particular moment. One minute we‘re enjoying a cuddle, the next they‘re hurlingthat question at us when we‘re least expecting it. They say it so fast that we don‘t have chance to make up a false
  • 62. reply or even to think straight, which leads us to stutter and then be accused of thinking of our ex. Asking what we‘rethinking is basically a nice way of saying ‗you aren‘t allowed to have private thoughts, unless they‘re about me‘.Annoying female habit 4: Saying „I‟m fine‟, when you‟re not happySo she stood in front of the television while the football was on, we got a bit iffy and snapped, and now all sorts ofissues have been bought up. Then she says it – that passive-aggressive statement that marks the start of thedreaded silent treatment: ―I‘m fine‖. Erm, are you really fine because you‘ve just screamed at us until you‘ve gone redin the face, and now you‘re laying face down on the bed crying. If you‘re unhappy just outline the problem and thenwe can sort it out and carry on as normal. Or – even better – don‘t outline the problem and let us watch the football inpeace.Annoying female habit 5: Using sex as a weaponOne of the most annoying things that a woman can do is deny her man of sexual privileges. Some women seem totake great pleasure in using our weakness to their own advantage through the classic ‗if you don‘t do this, we‘re nothaving sex‘ scenario. If you‘re going to stop us from doing one thing, please don‘t let it be sex. We don‘t stop youfrom eating and drinking, so please don‘t mess with our basic human needs either.Annoying female habit 6: Being over-emotionalYou cry at funerals, you cry at weddings, you cry at happy films, you cry at sad films. This makes us feel awkwardbecause we just don‘t know what to say or do when you‘re sat sobbing all over our freshly ironed shirt. Where do allthese tears come from? We think women should just have an annual crying day where they get together and cry fortwenty four hours, before coming home and being normal for the other 364 days of the year. It would solve a lot of ourproblems.Annoying female habit 7: Incessant talkingWe‘ve heard that women are estimated to say around 20, 000 words a day – which is an awful lot compared to thepaltry 7, 000 estimated for men – so we understand that she needs to get her daily nattering fix, but why is it alwaysat the most inappropriate times? She was quiet all the way through the family dinner when we needed her to breakthe awkward silence, but as soon as we start getting to the competitive part of a multi-player game with our friends,she just won‘t shut up about how cute the neighbour‘s cat looks when it sits next to the rose bush. To make it evenmore annoying, the actual part of the story she was getting at whilst rambling on about the neighbour‘s cat, was thatthe cat‘s owner now works at the grocery store down the road. Ladies, if you‘re going to talk, pick the right momentand please, just get to the point.How to tease your guy5 sexy ways to tease your manWant to tease your guy? If you want to put back some urgency into your bedroom anticsread these five tops tips – they‘ll help you seductively torture your man and make himscream out, begging for you:Tease your man by flipping him overIf you want to tease your man in bed, you need to surprise him. All too often girls do the same old tricks on guys andwe all know it‘s not hot to please your guy in the same way his last girl did. To make sure you stand out in bed,surprise your guy by hitting the spots everyone else normally neglects. One way to do this is to flip him over. Mentypically stay on their backs or are on top during sex. To mix things up you should lay your man on his front. This way
  • 63. his neck is open. Try to kiss his neck and whisper the odd naughty fantasy or line into his ear. At the same time runyour hands down his back – feel free to use your nails too girls.Tease your man by getting icyWhen we say get icy we‘re not suggesting you crank up some Vanilla Ice to turn your man on. Instead, you shouldintroduce some of the cold stuff into your foreplay. You can use ice in a number of ways to please and tease, so dowhatever you feel comfortable with. To start with, you could blindfold your guy using a satin scarf. Then, with your guyblindfolded pop some ice into your mouth and start to slowly kiss him. It can get messy, but go with it as the icechanges the way you kiss completely. It also makes kissing exciting and novel. Next, place the ice on your man‘specs; sliding the cubes down towards his groin. Slide the cubes down slowly though. This will make it excruciatinglypleasurable for your man. It‘s always a good idea to have some fresh towels to hand once ice-time is over.
  • 64. Tease your man by using the hands off approachOne of the simplest ways to tease your man is one of the sexiest. Tell your man that he is not allowed to touch you atall. At some point most of you will have either read about this or tried it. So to make the hands off approach moreinteresting, try doing it in two stages. The first stage is to tell your guy that he is not allowed to touch you at all. Youmay want to handcuff him, whilst you tease his body in other ways. The second stage is to untie your guy and let himpleasure you. However, he is not allowed to touch you with his hands or mouth. You should select a few items he canuse – like a feather – and make sure he sticks to the rules. After five or 10 minutes of this teasing he won‘t be able tostop himself from pouncing on you.
  • 65. Tease your man by being casualSometimes when you try too hard to be seductive it can end up being a bit of a turn off. Keep it simple and tone thelevels of seduction down by being casually suggestive to turn your man on instead. For example, when you and yourman are alone in your house, walk by an open door naked. If you don‘t feel comfortable being completely naked, popon some sexy underwear instead. Other ways you can tease your guy is to wear a white t-shirt without a bra. Thenadd some water to your chest area until the top is slightly see-through. Go into the room where your man is and startto do something, like making a drink or reading a magazine. Your guy will eventually clock the way you look. The factthat you are being so casual will heighten his arousal and you‘ll be sure to have some explosive bedroom fun.Tease your man by strip teasingAlthough you may not want to start pole dancing or wearing some studded stilettos, strip teasing is a great way totease your man. As with most things, a decent strip tease is all about the mindset. You need to figure out what kind ofpersona you want to give when doing the strip tease; do you want to be smouldering and fierce or timid and sweet?The next step is to make yourself feel comfortable and confident. Find something to wear that you look and feel goodin and find some music that you can move to easily. It can be worth practising your moves a few times in front of themirror or even attending a burlesque night. Once you‘ve stripped right down, be sure to leave one item on when youfinally let him have you – being unable to see everything is part of the fun.5 easy ways to make your relationship strongerHow to make your relationship betterThese five quick tips will make any relationship stronger. If you‘re fed up of fighting, tired oftrust issues or just plain bored, read these five tips to make your relationship better:Make your relationship better by addressing old issuesFights, jealousy and previous misdemeanours upset our little bubble of romance and can make relationships a trickyminefield. If you find yourself constantly arguing over the same issues, or blowing up in anger over the smallest oftriggers, it may be because you and your partner have not addressed some old issues. Next time this happens, try tostay calm and work out why you have reacted in this way. If you recognise that you are angry about something thathas happened in the past it is time to be brave and sit down with your partner to discuss it. Try not to accuse them.Instead talk through the problem, being as clear as possible about the way you feel. Try to look them in the eyes, asthis helps build trust and intimacy. Once you‘ve talked through your feelings attempt to work out a solution together.Although it may take a long time to heal this unresolved issue, if you feel you cannot forgive the person, it may betime to walk away. These issues will only continue to repeat themselves.Make your relationship better by taking time outBetween going to work, keeping fit and doing chores, it can be difficult to find the time to spend some decent timewith your partner. In the UK alone, a typical childless couple only spends an average of two and a half hours a daywith their partner, and of that time nearly an entire hour is spent watching TV. If that sounds familiar it‘s time to makesome changes. Firstly, have a TV ban and take your partner on some dates. If you‘re struggling for ideas, pretendthat you are going on your first few dates. Where would you take a guy or girl to impress them; a romantic hillsidespot for a picnic or a trendy bar to see a new band? Choose locations that allow you both to talk to one another andideally that are new to you both. Sharing new experiences will help reinvigorate your love life and will bring you bothcloser together. Remember, these dates are all about fun, so enjoy it.
  • 66. Make your relationship better by changing genderThe opposite sex can seem like a different species. Men and women have different habits, ideals and needs.Therefore it‘s no surprise that we often find it difficult to get along with each other. The key to a good relationship is tounderstand that we are not alike. We will not always share the same attitudes or perspectives. So, the next time yourguy tells you that you are overreacting, or your girl tells you that you don‘t care, listen to them. Instead of explodingwith rage at their idiocy, ask them why they think that and actually take what they say on board. You then need toexplain, clearly and calmly, why you think otherwise. This is not to say that you should use their gender as an excusewhen they treat you badly. However, trying to get into one another‘s mindset and understanding why your partneracts in a certain way may help you overcome many nasty obstacles and end a lot of fights.Make your relationship better by getting more sexSex can be a chore. After a long day at work do we really want someone getting hot and sweaty on us? We couldhave another 20 minutes in bed! Yet, the more we do it the more we want it. So at times, although it sounds veryunromantic, it can be best to just power through and do it a few times a week. Once you‘ve combated yourreluctance, you‘ll reap all of the benefits. Not only are there zillions of health perks to having regular sex, yourrelationship will also benefit. This is because when we have sex the love drug, oxytocin, is released, which makes usbuild up a strong bond with the guy or girl we‘re in bed with. It also promotes trust and makes us feel more generoustowards one another. The best way to get more sex is to make sure you and your partner consider it to be a priority.Also try to find a time that suits you. If you get too tired to have sex before bed, try to do it in the morning or when youfirst get home.Make your relationship better by spending time apartOkay, we know that we are at risk of contradicting ourselves, but relationships are all about balance. So although youneed to make sure you spend quality time together, it‘s also not healthy to live in a two person love nestconstantly. Not only will your partner‘s every move start to irritate you beyond belief, but boredom may begin to creepinto your relationship. Having your own interests, social scene and hobbies will help keep you stimulated, balancedand healthy, and these qualities will inevitably also pass on into your relationship too. The trick to spending time apartis to agree with your partner how much ―time off‖ you want to give each other. Once agreed, find something thatexcites you. This may be a holiday with friends, a charity challenge or training for a new event, like a 10k or
  • 67. marathon. Choose something that helps you develop as an individual as this will help you feel more independent andmore interesting within yourself and your relationship.Guide to aphrodisiacsCan aphrodisiacs really stimulate sexual desire?Named after Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love, aphrodisiacs are substances — usuallyfood, drinks or scents — that supposedly enhance sexual desire and energy. But doaphrodisiacs really work? Here, the team at realbuzz.com take a look at the facts and mythsbehind aphrodisiacs to decide whether they really do stimulate sexual desire.Giving aphrodisiacs a tryMost people will be aware of or even have tried some form of aphrodisiac in an attempt to improve their sex life —and no, we‘re not talking about Viagra here, which only affects your sexual ability rather than desire. There are lots ofproducts — both natural and artificial — that supposedly enhance sexual desire; however, if you wish to giveaphrodisiacs a try, then our advice is to use one of the natural aphrodisiacs which can often be found around thehouse, rather than forking out on products which may cost you a packet and fail to deliver.Some common aphrodisiacsCommon aphrodisiacs include peaches, bananas, pine nuts, mussels, eels, horseradish, asparagus,cucumbers, and onions — although we‘re not too sure your partner would be in the mood for much loving after araw onion or two! For a little self-indulgence you could also throw into this list truffles, caviar, strawberries,oysters and chocolate — but not necessarily all at the same time!Some people choose to quite literally spice things up with a little chilli, curry, or any other form of sweat-inducingspice, since they produce results much like sex would, including increasing your heart rate and causing us toperspire. Other potential aphrodisiacs include ginseng — which literally means „man root‟ — and scents such asvanilla, patchouli or musk, which are believed to awaken and provoke sexual energy.Why did people use aphrodisiacs originally?Aphrodisiacs have been used for many centuries and there is much debate about their effectiveness. Yet if it was allnonsense, why do people still turn to them to give them an increase in sexual desire?Some aphrodisiacs were chosen in the first place due to their shape and resemblance to male or female genitalia.For example, rhino horn has widely thought to have been a useful aphrodisiac and in some quarters this is where theword ‗horny‘ is thought to have come from! The Chinese have also traditionally used other animal-basedaphrodisiacs, which gained their reputation from the apparent virility or aggressiveness of the animal source — suchas tiger penis or even turtle eggs. However, many of us would be so appalled at the thought of an endangeredspecies such as a tiger or rhino being threatened just to enhance out sexual pleasure, that it would hardly put us inthe mood for love.The evidence that aphrodisiacs workAphrodisiacs are based more on cultural myths than any fact, but people still continue to experiment with them to pepup their sex lives. However, there is no scientific evidence which proves that aphrodisiacs can directly stimulatesexual desire.On the other hand, the power of suggestion can work wonders — so, if you believe something is an aphrodisiac, thenit may well have the desired effect. And of course, the brain can certainly be stimulated by food, scents and drinks to
  • 68. such a degree that it puts the body in a state where it is more ready or prepared for sexual activity — even thoughthey won‘t necessarily create desire.One of the most commonly-held views is that chocolate is an aphrodisiac. There is some debate as to whether achemical called phenylethylamine present in chocolate is an aphrodisiac, but this compound is thought to be quicklydegraded by enzymes so that significant concentrations do not reach the brain. Also, other substances such asalcohol only really help in that they reduce inhibition.So, do aphrodisiacs work?Strictly speaking, no. None of the substances that are considered to be aphrodisiacs work the way they are said to,and they don‘t directly affect your sexual organs or sexual desires to make you more aroused or desiring. However,the power of suggestion can be a powerful thing, and so using ‗aphrodisiac‘ food, drinks or scents as part of yourseduction technique can spice up things up in your relationship.Some substances obviously have an immediate effect on our moods. For example, a small amount of alcohol relaxesyou emotionally and physically and increases your confidence, as well as opening small blood vessels, making youfeel flushed and warm. Caffeine and sugar will give you a quick boost, too, making you feel energetic and ready foraction.On the whole, however, what you eat and drink long-term will have a greater effect on your general health and well-being — and thereby possibly help to increase your sexual desire. However, you might want to draw the line atsuggestions in the Kama Sutra which state that a ram‘s or goat‘s testicle boiled in sweetened milk could be the way tostimulate your sexual desire! Instead, sticking to a healthy diet should do the trick …Top 5 breakup foods5 breakup foods and their healthy alternativesFollowing a breakup, many of us naturally turn to high-calorie foods to help ease the painand make us feel better. However, a diet of junk food can have implications on your healthand appearance that will stick with you long after your ex has become a distant memory.Fortunately, there are many foods that will satisfy your cravings without compromising yourhealth. Here are 5 common breakup foods and their healthy alternatives, to help get youthrough your breakup feeling better than ever.Ice creamIce cream is one of the worlds most popular comfort foods. However, the frozen dessert is packed with calories,meaning that working your way through litres of the stuff will more likely leave you feeling guilty, bloated and sluggishthan comforted.Indulge your cravings without the guilt by replacing ice cream with a low fat tub offrozen yoghurt - or fruit sorbet, ifyou are feeling particularly saintly. With the many flavours of frozen yoghurt available today, switching your frozentreat does not have to mean compromising on taste. For an added health boost, try sprinkling some walnuts onyour dessert to up your intake of omega-3 fatty acids, which can help improve your mood.ChocolateChocolate is another food frequently in demand following a breakup. Unfortunately, chocolate - like many of ourfavourite treats - is high in fat and sugar. However, if you find yourself craving chocolate following a breakup, there isno need to completely deny yourself.
  • 69. Chocolate contains relaxing magnesium, soothing anandamide and mood-boosting phenylethylamine, makingchocolate a good mood food. To safeguard your health, try snacking on dark chocolate instead of milk, and limityour intake to a few squares a day. Alternatively, try switching your chocolate bar for somechocolate-coveredstrawberries or raisins to up the nutritional value of your snack.Crisps and chipsFamily-sized bags of potato or tortilla chips are all too tempting to tuck into in the face of a breakup. However, notonly are crisps packed with fat, calories and salt, but they have next to no nutritional value, so munching on them isunlikely to leave you feeling great.To satisfy cravings while improving your health and waistline, try swapping crisps for some lightly seasonedpopcorn; a healthy wholegrain snack that islower in fat than crisps, higher in fibre, and packed with antioxidantsand nutrients. Popcorn also contains B vitamins, which have great mood-boostingproperties.PizzaFew of us feel like cooking when we are down, so pizzas and takeaways might seem like a good meal optionfollowing a breakup. However, while the odd slice of pizza is unlikely to do you any harm, making pizza a regular partof your diet is likely to take its toll on your health, mood and appearance.Fortunately, pizza is a "junk food" that actually has many healthy elements when done right, so next time you aretempted by a pizza, try forcing yourself out in the kitchen to prepare a healthy version instead. To make a healthierpizza, try replacing the dough with some wholegrain ciabatta or pitta bread, and pile on the veg. While it is alsowise to go easy on the mozzarella, a bit of cheese could actually do you good due to its high levels of tryptophan ;an amino acid which boosts serotonin.Cakes and cookiesIf cakes and cookies are your weakness, it may be worth switching to some lower fat alternatives to help you stay inshape while braving your breakup. To replace the cookies, opt for some chocolate or caramel flavoured rice orcorn cakes, which are lower in fat, calories and cholesterol. Alternatively, try somedried fruit oatcakes, or a healthyfruit and seed bar.If you are craving something sweet but slightly more stodgy, try replacing cakes with hot-cross buns, maltloaf or sweet bagels, which are lower in fat than cake (so long as you go easy on the margarine!) and also have ahigher nutritional value. Alternatively, try some pure fruit spread on toast or crumpets for an easy, healthy andcomforting sweet snack.
  • 70. Love & dating A-ZA guide to dating terminologyConfused by dating lingo? Not sure how to define your relationship? Then check out our A-Z of love and dating for the words you need to know.A is for AttractionWhat is it: Attraction is the force that draws us to another person. This can be instant, based on appearance andsexual desire, or a longer process developing from a deeper bond. Although nobody knows for sure what attracts usto certain people, scientists have developed various theories about how we pick mates. For instance, it is believedthat symmetrical features, waist-to-hip ratio and smell can all make a difference to how attracted (and attractive) weare to others.B is for BromanceWhat is it: A bromance is a close, affectionate relationship and deep bond between two heterosexual males, or―bros‖. Often as close as a romantic relationship, men involved in this non-sexual relationship can start take oncouple-like qualities, sharing affectionate nicknames, enjoying weekends away and even going on ―man dates‖.C is for ChemistryWhat is it: Chemistry is one of the most integral components of dating, yet although it is spoken of often it is hard todefine what exactly it is or why we feel it. When people talk of feeling ―chemistry‖ with someone it generally involvesfeeling a connection with someone, enjoying their company and feeling attracted to them. While some people thinkchemistry needs to be instant in a relationship, others believe it can develop over time.D is for DatingWhat is it: Dating is when two people spend time together in a bid to get to know each other in a romantic context.While the definition of dating is often confusing, it is generally thought that at this stage of a relationship exclusivity is
  • 71. not essential. For some, a date is just a fun, one-off activity; however, dating is often a way of testing compatibilityand exploring the possibility of a relationship.E is for Exit strategyWhat is it: An exit strategy is a pre-determined plan for bailing on a bad date. This is often employed for first dates,particularly of the blind variety. Common exit strategies include a pre-arranged phone call from a friend to alert you toan ―emergency‖, feigning complete exhaustion or illness, or fabricating other important plans for later that evening.F is for Friends with benefitsWhat is it: Friends with benefits refers to a situation where two friends engage in a sexual relationship withoutcommitment or, in some cases, exclusivity. Although some view this as an ideal situation, the blurred boundaries andintimacy involved in this situation can cause confusion or hurt, with a US study showing that a quarter of friends withbenefits situations conclude with the relationship ending altogether – including the friendship.G is for Going DutchWhat is it: ―Going Dutch‖ refers to when a man and a woman go on a date and split the bill instead of the man paying,as is often expected. According to a survey by First Direct, while 58 per cent of women expect to go Dutch on a firstdate, only 26 per cent of men do, and 55 per cent of men expect pay the full bill on a first date.H is for HiberdatingWhat is it: There are two definitions of hiberdating. The first refers to the common situation where a couple ignore alltheir other friends once they start dating in order to spend all their time hanging out with, texting and writing Facebookstatuses about each other. The second refers to dating someone only during the winter months, often getting togetherin a bid to brighten up the gloomy winter months then splitting up come summer.I is for “I‟ll call you”What is it: The line often used at the end of a date. What does it mean? Well, who knows? For those familiar with thisline, you are probably aware that ―I‘ll call you‖ could mean a wide range of things including, but not limited to, thefollowing: ―I won‘t be calling you‖, ―I‘ll call you, if I don‘t get a better offer‖, ―I may call you – I haven‘t quite decidedyet‖. Of course, for the lucky few ―I‘ll call you‖ may just mean the following: they‘ll call you.J is for JaguarWhat is it: You may be aware of the cougar phenomenon, referring to older women who date younger men. However,cougar is not the only wildcat nickname given to women seeking out younger men. While a cougar refers to a womanin her 40s, a puma is the name given to pre-cougar women in their late 20s or 30s, and a jaguar refers to those over50 who date younger men.K is for Kiss and tellWhat is it: A kiss and tell is the disclosure of personal details involving your sex life to others, especially incircumstances where one person would like the information to be kept secret. In recent years, celebrity kiss and tellshave become very common in the media, with people revealing details of their sexual liaisons with celebrities formoney.L is for LDRsWhat is it: In dating terms, LDR stands for long-distance relationship, where a couple carry on a relationship despitebeing geographically far apart. Since the advent and rise in popularity of the internet and mobile phones, the number
  • 72. of long-distance relationships has increased. According to statistics from the Center for the Study of Long-DistanceRelationships, one in 10 US marriages have included a period at long distance.M is for Missing in actionWhat is it: You‘ve met someone, you get along great, there‘s amazing chemistry... and then suddenly they disappearoff the face of the earth. No calls, no texts, no Facebook messages. Yep, your date has gone MIA. While the reasonspeople pull a disappearing act are often varied and complicated, more often than not it is simply a way of ending arelationship without drama and conflict (and who wants to date someone that gutless anyway?).N is for Niche datingWhat is it: Online dating has soared in popularity in recent years, with many people signing up to browse for theirperfect partner, and now the quest for love has gotten even easier with the launch of niche dating sites which allowpeople to hunt out those who share their particular passions. Some examples of niche dating sites include websitesfor those of different religious backgrounds, for those who love a man or woman in uniform, and for vegetarians oreco-friendly singletons.O is for Office romanceWhat is it: An office romance is, as the name suggests, a relationship or flirtation between two people employed bythe same company. Although office romances can have their downsides if handled badly, a surprising number ofpeople find love in the workplace. According to a study by Vault.com, 59 per cent of us have had an office romance,while separate research suggests that between 22 and 50 per cent of office romances lead to marriage.P is for Pseudo-relationshipWhat is it: A pseudo-relationship is when two people (most often a man and a woman) hang out together, shareprivate jokes together, spend special occasions together and go through all the motions of being a couple... withoutactually being in a relationship. Often there are no romantic feelings involved or, if there are, they are generally one-sided. This is also known as ―Just Friends‖ syndrome.Q is for Quiet night inWhat is it: Quiet nights in are something that you will probably experience a lot during your time of hiberdating (seeabove). For many couples, entering a relationship means leaving behind (or cutting down on) nights out with friendsin favour of quiet nights in with your partner. According to a study of 3,000 women, two in three women preferspending time with their husbands than with their friends.R is for ReboundWhat is it: A rebound relationship is one that occurs before you are fully over your last relationship or partner. Thedefinition of a rebound relationship is not based on the time that has passed since your breakup but rather on yourfeelings towards it. If you were not fully over your ex before meeting your partner or are using the new relationship asa form of revenge, to boost your self-esteem or to fill a void, it is likely you are in a rebound relationship.S is for Speed datingWhat is it: Speed dating is a matchmaking event in which men and women are rotated for a series of mini dates. Atthe end of the session participants can indicate which men or women they are interested in and, providing there is amatch, contact details will then be provided. While most speed dating events are simply organised by age, manyniche events exist such as gay and lesbian events, Christian speed dating and Comic Con speed dating for comicbook fans.
  • 73. T is for Three day ruleWhat is it: The three day rule is a rule often employed by men when making contact with a girl after getting hernumber or a first date. The idea is that by waiting three days to get in touch they will avoid appearing desperate.However, according to a YouGov survey commissioned by Match.com, couples are now waiting less time (just anaverage of 1.52 days) to get in touch. This is believed to be down to new technology such as mobile phones whichmake it easier to get in touch.U is for UmfriendWhat is it: Umfriend is a slang expression used to refer to someone who you are not yet sure of your relationshipstatus with or with whom you are trying to conceal a relationship from others. As the nature of this relationship isuncertain or undefined, the ―Um‖ depicts a level of hesitation, as in: ―This is Jane, my... um, friend.‖V is for Virtual relationshipWhat is it: A virtual relationship is a relationship that takes place over the internet; for instance through email,chatrooms and IMs. As it has become easier to communicate with others through new technology, the number ofonline relationships has risen, with some couples never actually meeting face to face. The text version of a virtualrelationship is a textationship, in which a relationship is conducted purely by text.W is for WingmanWhat is it: A wingman (or wingwoman) is a friend who you take along to a social event or bar to help you find andapproach members of the opposite sex. A wingman‘s duties may include keeping your potential partner‘s friendsoccupied while you make your move or going along with any fictitious stories you may use to impress your guy or girl.X is for XoxoWhat is it: Xoxo is often used on texts, emails or instant messages to indicate hugs and kisses (the o‘s stand for hugsand the x‘s for kisses). This is a term used to express affection when signing off a message and is often usedbetween good friends or those who are dating.Y is for YesWhat is it: These three little letters are perhaps the cheapest and easiest way to restore peace in your relationship.According to a study of 3000 adults, the average couple argues 312 times a year, so it is important to know when toback down from an argument and just agree with your partner (even if you don‘t fully mean it!). Next time your partnerasks if you will change the channel, wash up or take out the bins, try using this magic word to save yourself someconflict!Z is for ZelophobiaWhat is it: Many people experience jealousy at some point in a relationship, but for those with zelophobia jealousy isa cause of extreme fear. Many zelophobics are so afraid of the feeling of jealousy (perhaps due to their previousexperiences of it) that they refrain from all romantic involvement. Having therapy to talk through emotions and buildself-esteem can help with zelophobia.Top 5 breakup foods
  • 74. 5 breakup foods and their healthy alternativesFollowing a breakup, many of us naturally turn to high-calorie foods to help ease the painand make us feel better. However, a diet of junk food can have implications on your healthand appearance that will stick with you long after your ex has become a distant memory.Fortunately, there are many foods that will satisfy your cravings without compromising yourhealth. Here are 5 common breakup foods and their healthy alternatives, to help get youthrough your breakup feeling better than ever.Ice creamIce cream is one of the worlds most popular comfort foods. However, the frozen dessert is packed with calories,meaning that working your way through litres of the stuff will more likely leave you feeling guilty, bloated and sluggishthan comforted.Indulge your cravings without the guilt by replacing ice cream with a low fat tub offrozen yoghurt - or fruit sorbet, ifyou are feeling particularly saintly. With the many flavours of frozen yoghurt available today, switching your frozentreat does not have to mean compromising on taste. For an added health boost, try sprinkling some walnuts onyour dessert to up your intake of omega-3 fatty acids, which can help improve your mood.ChocolateChocolate is another food frequently in demand following a breakup. Unfortunately, chocolate - like many of ourfavourite treats - is high in fat and sugar. However, if you find yourself craving chocolate following a breakup, there isno need to completely deny yourself.Chocolate contains relaxing magnesium, soothing anandamide and mood-boosting phenylethylamine, makingchocolate a good mood food. To safeguard your health, try snacking on dark chocolate instead of milk, and limityour intake to a few squares a day. Alternatively, try switching your chocolate bar for somechocolate-coveredstrawberries or raisins to up the nutritional value of your snack.Crisps and chipsFamily-sized bags of potato or tortilla chips are all too tempting to tuck into in the face of a breakup. However, notonly are crisps packed with fat, calories and salt, but they have next to no nutritional value, so munching on them isunlikely to leave you feeling great.To satisfy cravings while improving your health and waistline, try swapping crisps for some lightly seasonedpopcorn; a healthy wholegrain snack that islower in fat than crisps, higher in fibre, and packed with antioxidantsand nutrients. Popcorn also contains B vitamins, which have great mood-boostingproperties.PizzaFew of us feel like cooking when we are down, so pizzas and takeaways might seem like a good meal optionfollowing a breakup. However, while the odd slice of pizza is unlikely to do you any harm, making pizza a regular partof your diet is likely to take its toll on your health, mood and appearance.Fortunately, pizza is a "junk food" that actually has many healthy elements when done right, so next time you aretempted by a pizza, try forcing yourself out in the kitchen to prepare a healthy version instead. To make a healthierpizza, try replacing the dough with some wholegrain ciabatta or pitta bread, and pile on the veg. While it is alsowise to go easy on the mozzarella, a bit of cheese could actually do you good due to its high levels of tryptophan ;an amino acid which boosts serotonin.
  • 75. Cakes and cookiesIf cakes and cookies are your weakness, it may be worth switching to some lower fat alternatives to help you stay inshape while braving your breakup. To replace the cookies, opt for some chocolate or caramel flavoured rice orcorn cakes, which are lower in fat, calories and cholesterol. Alternatively, try somedried fruit oatcakes, or a healthyfruit and seed bar.If you are craving something sweet but slightly more stodgy, try replacing cakes with hot-cross buns, maltloaf or sweet bagels, which are lower in fat than cake (so long as you go easy on the margarine!) and also have ahigher nutritional value. Alternatively, try some pure fruit spread on toast or crumpets for an easy, healthy andcomforting sweet snack.--Sexercises for menExercise your way to better sexExercise your way to better sex – you‘ll be shocked at how much your sex life improves withthese simple exercises:Hip LungesEvery man must learn how to thrust, and thrust well. Hip lunges work the hips and will give you the perfect powerforce you need to please your girl.Method: place one foot forward, so that your feet are about a metre apart and your knees are slightly bent. Push yourpelvis forward. Hold this position for 30 seconds making sure you feel a stretch.Interval runningIf the flesh around your pubic bone is padded with too much fat it will make your penis look smaller and make it moredifficult to penetrate your girl deeply.Method: find a hill and sprint up it, then walk back down for recovery. Beginners aim for 10 x 45 seconds uphillrunning whilst advanced runners should aim for 15 to 20 x 60 seconds uphill running.
  • 76. KegelsThought kegels were just for the girls? Think again boys. Kegels can make you last longer, be harder and they giveyou more control over your ejaculations.Method: imagine you are urinating and then try to stop the flow. Repeat this squeeze, hold, release cycle 10 times,trying to hold for 10 seconds per squeeze.Upper body workoutHas your girl ever complained that you‘re squashing her when you‘re in bed? If so, it‘s probably time you worked onyour upper body strength.Method: to build strength in your upper arms do several sets of different exercises. A good group to try is: 12 x tricepdips, 12 x box press-ups and 12 x pull-ups. Repeat this three times.Have a kick aboutLove the beautiful game? So does your libido. Football boosts testosterone levels, which in turn gives your sex drivea boost.Method: we don‘t need to tell you how to play football, but one tip we do have is to try and play at home. Researchhas found men‘s testosterone is higher for home games.Sexercises for womenExercise your way to better sexExercise your way to better sex – you‘ll be shocked at how much your sex life improves withthese simple exercises:
  • 77. SkippingIf you‘re stressed the last thing you want is sex. Doing cardio-based activities will pump you full of endorphins andimprove your mood though. In turn this will make you want it more and will give your sex drive a boost.Method: wear a sports bra, aim for about 70-80 skips a minute at first. To tone your abs do a running skip by bringingyour knees up in a high march as you jump, alternating each leg between skips.Upavistha KonasanaAre you satisfied in bed? Most women aren‘t. If you want to orgasm more then you should try and increase the bloodflow to the pelvis with this fab yoga move.Method: Sit on the floor with your legs wide. Keep your toes and knees pointing straight up. Lean your upper bodyforward as far as it goes comfortably. Hold for five to 10 deep breaths.
  • 78. The plankIs this another exotic position? Nope. Fact is most women hate crazy positions because for most of us our bodiesjiggle and wiggle involuntarily. The plank, though, helps tone up these wobbly areas and makes you more confidenttrying new things in bed.Method: lie face down, push up and hold your body off the ground using your toes and forearms for support. Keepyour back straight. Hold for 30-60 seconds and do daily.Pelvic floor musclesThey don‘t sound pretty, but pelvic floor exercises are worth doing. Doing pelvic floor exercises regularly will makeyou more sensitive and they can give you stronger orgasms. Plus you can do them anywhere – at your desk, on thebus, in the shower.Method: imagine you are urinating and then try to stop the flow. Repeat this hold, squeeze, and release cycle 10times. Try to hold each for 10 seconds.Bow bendWe‘ve all seen that insanely good yoga whizz and we‘ve all probably had the same thought: I bet they‘re great in bed.Getting more flexible will enable you to do more positions and allow for deeper penetration, which will make sexbetter for both you and your guy.Method: lie on your stomach and take your heels as close to your butt as you can, then take your hands behind andhold your ankles. Keep your knees hip width apart.5 qualities that women look for in menHow to attract a womanWhen it comes to attracting the fairer sex, sometimes you‘re hit with the sudden realisationthat women really are from planet Venus, and bear no resemblance to the ill-informedspecies that inhabits planet Mars. How the planet earth are you to catch her eye? Here‘sthe confused guy‘s guide to attracting women:Male quality 1: He is honest and loyalProve to your love interest that you are kind, honest, and loyal – a genuinely charming fellow, some may say. Termssuch as ‗love rat‘ and ‗dirt bag‘ weren‘t made up just for a laugh you know. Many women have had the unfortunateexperience of dating these time-wasters-in-disguise-as-princes on numerous occasions, and rarely does it have ahappy ending. In fact, once a woman has dated one of these scheming snakes, boy does she remember it; it takes along time to rebuild the trust that she once built up only to have it come crashing down, so being honest and loyal willgo a long way in impressing her. If you‘ve been a scheming little scoundrel in the past, it may be best to keep it quietnow as you have (please say you have) changed. In such circumstances, don‘t talk about how you cheated on yourex and broke her heart. This will almost definitely put your potential new flame off for good. In short, be a charmingchap and you can‘t go far wrong.
  • 79. Male quality 2: He possesses a good sense of humourNow, as we‘ve got the serious stuff out of the way, let‘s move onto the exciting part – humour. Who doesn‘t love agood rib-clutching bit of humour that makes us gag for oxygen every now and again? Studies have shown that manywomen favour humour over looks in a potential partner, so there‘s still hope for many of us yet. Just a quick flickthrough the lonely hearts ads shows that, indeed, a ―GSOH‖ must be one of the most favourable traits in a man. Agood sense of humour acts as a natural aphrodisiac and will turn your love interest‘s thoughts about you from ―okay‖to ―hey hey!‖ in less than thirty seconds.Male quality 3: He has ambitionMen with drive, men with goals, men with a burning desire to get somewhere in life – this ambitious type of gentlemanattracts women. We‘re not suggesting that you should be climbing the career ladder at break-neck speeds to bedeemed as ambitious, but you‘ll have a much easier time winning over a woman if you can demonstrate some form ofpassion, objective, or ambition in life. No woman wants a man who sits around being content doing nothing, so if thisis you, things need to change. Fill your life with interests and hobbies – things to talk about when she asks you whatyou enjoy. Identify where you want to be in life and make it happen. Women will be falling at your feet in no time.Male quality 4: He practices good hygieneThis is a no-brainer. Whilst your rock star charm may have made the girls drool in school, slicked-back greasy hair,dirt under your nails, and tingeing the air with your body odour won‘t get you in the ladies‘ good books now chaps (wehope you enjoyed it while it lasted). You don‘t have to rival your love interest‘s beauty routine to take a pride in yourappearance – just put the basic hygiene rules into practice and you‘ve mastered the basics. Have a shower, trim yournails, get your hair trimmed, and wear decent clothes. Sloppy is not sexy so scrub up!Male quality 5: He is dominant and protectiveAs much as women love to show their independence, scientific studies have suggested that they are subconsciouslyattracted to dominant, assertive men. This isn‘t to say that you should make her feel intimidated and uncomfortable.No woman wants to be slowly backing into a corner as an overzealous man tries to express his affection in the formof a passionate embrace. If a difficult situation arises though, take charge and be protective over her and – as muchas you may shudder with panic when you have to remove a spider from the bathroom – try your best to be fearless.
  • 80. Girls: 5 worst things to do in bed5 things that turn guys offHere‘s your guide on what not to do in bed. If you want to end your bedroom blunders, andrediscover your inner sex goddess, read these top five worst things to do in bed. You‘llnever turn him off again:Worst thing to do in bed 1: CryIf there was an awards ceremony for the worst thing to do in bed, crying would win. Not only will blubbering into yourman‘s chest tell him that he is a seriously bad lay, it will also make you seem a tad neurotic. Plus there‘s scientificevidence that confirms crying is a big sex faux pas. Researchers found that those men who smelt women‘s tear dropsbecame less sexually aroused than when they sniffed the placebo liquid. So listen up girls, when you next hop intobed make sure you avoid Bambi, Titanic and The Notebook. Tearjerker films are strictly off the menu for you.Worst thing to do in bed 2: LaughWe all know that women can get a bit hung up about stripping down and getting it on, but it seems guys are just asinsecure. Did you know that 83 per cent of men believe their performance could be improved? Or that in one of thelargest studies on penis size 45 per cent of the men surveyed wished they had a larger penis? So, when your guy isgiving you his best moves you must never laugh. Even if you are not laughing at his manhood or his moves, it willseriously offend and at worst deflate your guy if you snigger during sex. If you‘re one of those people who laugh whenyou get nervous, try to focus on something serious or, even better, try to focus on the job at hand.
  • 81. Worst thing to do in bed 3: Fake itWhen that pillow-biting, pleasure-hitting orgasm is just not happening it can be easy to fake it. Although screaming―O-O-O...yes, that‘s it darlin‘‖ seems like a great option at the time, your faking ways will make you both suffer in thelong-term. First off, he‘ll never know how to please you properly. Also guys are pretty good at picking up when youare faking it – imagine he found out? It would crush him. Lastly, your guy might expect you to come again next timeyou get frisky, which will put lots of unwanted pressure on you both. So, next time the orgasm fairy is on strike, simplytell him the truth and say ‗I really want you to come now‘. He‘ll love it.Worst thing to do in bed 4: Get shyOne of the biggest turn-offs for guys is when girls get shy after they‘ve talked about doing loads of kinky stuff. If youbig-up yourself and your moves telling your guy that you‘ll give him a lap-dance before riding him like a cowgirl, thenhe‘ll expect it. So if you‘re naturally shy in the bedroom don‘t get too carried away with the dirty talk and don‘t promisehim things you don‘t want to deliver on. Instead focus on building your self confidence in the boudoir. You can do
  • 82. simple things like buying a sexy new outfit that you feel comfortable in. Or you could take a pole-dancing class or tryto read some erotic books together. The key here is to remember you can turn up the heat as a shy girl, but don‘t doanything you‘re not comfortable with or promise him that you will.Worst thing to do in bed 5: Go blankGuys love a girl who knows what she wants. At times, men can feel under pressure to take control and perform. So,when he asks you how you want it, don‘t say ‗I don‘t know, whatever you want‘. This may be a sign that he‘d like alittle guidance. Instead tell him how you like it or what feels good. Even if it‘s just simple instructions like, ‗touch here‘or ‗go harder‘. If you draw a blank in bed regularly and you feel a little lost when he asks you how you want it, maybeit‘s time to discover what you like. Get to know your body and find out what gets you going. This way the next time thequestion arises you‘ll know just how to answer.Sex A-ZThe alphabet just got sexyThis sex A-Z is a lesson in love that will top up your lover lingo in just 26 words:A is for abstinenceWhat is it: voluntarily not engaging in sexual activityKicking off a sex A-Z with the least sexy word going may seem dumb, but according to a study 79 per cent of USparents want teens to be taught that they should not engage in sexual activity until they are married or at least in anadult relationship leading to marriage.B is for booty callWhat is it: a summons for casual and typically late-night sexAlthough booty calls certainly happened in the past, texting has helped make late-night sex requests moreachievable. A study at the University of Iowa also states that a significant percentage of current relationships beganwith nonromantic sex.C is for cyber sexWhat is it: chatting to someone about sex onlineCyber sex is a fun, non-committed way to get a bit of a thrill without risking too much. You may think that men wouldbe more interested in cyber sex, but according to a study about married and single people it turns out women aremore likely to send sexy pics than blokes.D is for doggy styleWhat is it: a sex position where the man takes the woman from behindDoggy style is perhaps the most unromantically named sex position, but it does have its perks. This position is perfectfor women who are looking to reach orgasm because it lets men hit women‘s three hot spots at the same time.E is for edible underwearWhat is it: underwear that men and women wear that can be eaten
  • 83. Turning yourself into an edible treat can be a lot of fun for you and your partner and it will also satisfy your sweettooth. According to sex shop owners the most popular flavoured edible underwear is cherry and the least popular ischocolate.F is for foreplayWhat is it: sexual activity that typically leads to sexual intercourseCan you have too much foreplay? Although your first reaction may be no, it would seem that for some women toomuch attention to her ―special spot‖ can cause numbness or discomfort. To avoid this foreplay nightmare don‘t juststimulate the clitoris in one way – mix it up.G is for G spotWhat is it: a small bean-shaped area within the vaginaNamed after the gynaecologist who discovered it, Ernst Grafenberg, the G Spot has been a highly controversial andsomewhat mysterious bit of biology. Researchers still dispute the G Spots existence and there are even claims thatsome women have them, whilst others do not.H is for hiberdatingWhat is it: when someone ditches their friends when they are datingWe all know a hiberdater; that annoying friend who falls for someone and completely ditches everyone theyknow. Don‘t worry though everyone, apparently after two years, six months and 25 days the romance officially diesand your friend will probably come crawling back.I is for it‟s complicatedWhat is it: a status describing a state between friends and a relationshipIt‘s complicated – the status that is as awkward as a fifteen year old shopping with their mother. Facebook havekindly allowed you to broadcast this most uneasy of relationship statuses with their ―It‘s Complicated‖ status, and forthat we would like to thank them.
  • 84. J is for jackhammerWhat is it: a sex positionFor this sex acrobatic trick the man needs to stand up or kneel and lift the woman‘s legs, holding them around hershins so that her feet are behind him. The woman supports herself with her arms and she is titled up towards him.This move makes for some very intense sex.K is for kinkyWhat is it: participating in deviant sexual actsThe word kinky covers all manners of sins. To some, the word conjures images of hardcore latex and chains. Toothers, kinky could just mean wearing a pair of tight, fluffy pink knickers. The word used to describe a non-kinky guyor girl is vanilla.The alphabet just got sexyL is for love eggsWhat is it: vibrating sex toys that are usually used by women for sexual pleasureA lot of women would never admit to owning love eggs or a sex toy, but US researchers have found that one in everytwo women owns a kinky toy or two. Even when financial times are bad, sales of sex toys continues to rise.M is for massageWhat is it: rubbing and kneading another‘s musclesMassage is an easy way to make your partner feel great. At first, you could ask them to take a hot shower to relaxthem. Light a relaxing, scented calendar and use some aromatherapy oil too. Then rub, knead and touch your partnerand remember to ask them what they like.N is for nipple suckerWhat is it: a sex toy attached to the nipples to create a sucking sensationSomething that clamps around your nipple sounds intimidating, but they simply create a vacuum over the nipple andmake the area more sensitive. Be warned though, if you use a nipple clamp the size of your nipple can bepermanently increased.O is for online datingWhat is it: a system that allows you to find and communicate to a date onlineGone are the days when online dating was for the cursed and socially awkward. Everyone‘s doing it these days. Infact in just one month Hitwise said that online dating sites had 593 million hits in the United States alone.P is for pillow lustWhat is it: when people become so tired that going to bed seems almost sexually excitingBetween work, exercising, shopping and mates it can be hard to find the energy for sex. A survey reveals that morethan half of all men are so tired after work that they would rather have an extra hours sleep than have sex.
  • 85. Q is for quickieWhat is it: a hard and fast sex session that does not last very longThree minute wonders are rarely romantic or meaningful, but they can be very enjoyable and also practical. Thestand and deliver sex position is ideal for a quickie. The man stands up and the woman hooks her legs over theman‘s waist. Be warned, this position is not for the weak armed.R is for rampant rabbitWhat is it: a sex toy that vibrates and rotates and is shaped like a rabbitDo you know why it is shaped like a rabbit? In Japan, where the rampant rabbit was created, it was illegal to make asex toy shaped like a penis. So the ingenious creators opted to mimic the shape of the notoriously horny animal – therabbit.S is for spankingWhat is it: smacking someone‘s behind with your hand or a paddleThis saucy taboo turns people on in lots of different ways. Firstly, because it is just that: a taboo. Secondly, itincreases blood flow to the sensitive parts of your body and so it also heightens sexual arousal.T is for Tweet-ditchedWhat is it: someone finishing with you on TwitterThings have moved on since Sex and the City when Carrie got dumped on a post-it. These days the pain has beenmagnified and made public with the Tweet-ditch. Example: ―@boyfriend you are dumped #letsstillbefriends.‖ Ouch!U is for ursusagalmatophiliaWhat is it: the name given to the fetish for teddy bearsLock up Mr Panda and Mrs Snuffles, the teddy bears are not safe. It would seem that a small percentage of thehuman race have a thing for teddies. Ursuagalmatophiles seem to get turned on by the innocence of the teddy.V is for VenusWhat is it: the mythological goddess of love and beautyVenus was a saucy minx. She had lots of lovers including Mars, Adonis and Vulcan. Venus also was the mother tothat infamous love baby: Cupid. Did you also know that Venus and Aphrodite refer to the same goddess? Venus wasRoman, whilst Aphrodite was the Greek goddess.W is for wet dreamWhat is it: a nocturnal emission; or ejaculating when asleepAlthough wet dreams are typically associated with teenagers, men may still have them during their 20‘s and30‘s. Here are some fun facts for you: the average teenager has four erections every night and wet dreams happenmore at the weekend.X is for Xena the Princess WarriorWhat is it: a fantasy involving the hot Princess Warrior called Xena
  • 86. Xena the Princess Warrior is a bad-ass, sci-fi chick who can sort out the bad boys with a swish of her short leatherskirt. If Xena turns you on, then there are loads of Xena the Princess Warrior costumes for sale so the sexual fantasycan become a reality.Y is for yuriWhat is it: lesbian sexual relationships in animeIf you can‘t picture what yuri is like, imagine that the Power Puff Girls and Pokemon have just turned erotic. Somepopular yuri anime films include: Strawberry Panic, Maria-Sama Ga Miteru, Shin Koihime Musou.Z is for zelophiliaWhat is it: a condition when people become sexually aroused from jealousyEveryone gets jealous from time to time, but it‘s not so common to hear about people getting aroused by envy.Sufferers can seek treatment in various ways including psychoanalysis, hypnosis, behaviour therapy and cognitivetherapy.Top 10 sex facts from historyThe history facts you never knewOur ancestors were kinky, their books were raunchy and at times their behavior was justplain odd. Here are the bits from history that your teachers kept from you:Have you got a receipt for your wife, sir?In 953 Princess Olga of Russia introduced a law whereby men could ask to, essentially, return their wives if theyfound out they were not virgins. The husbands could ask for monetary or material compensation if they discoveredthat their wives were more experienced than they had hoped.Sex is the best medicineIf you were feeling sick in the 19th century then it was quite possible that your doctor may have prescribed you adose of alone time with a sex toy, ladies. The Museum of Sex explains that vibrator-induced orgasms helped doctorsidentify ―hysteria‖ and its symptoms.Love and marriageIn the 12th century a book was written called The Art of Courtly Love. Within it there were 31 rules that told the Britishupper-class how to love and who they could love. It told the rich that ―True love can have no place between husbandand wife‖ and that marriage should be thought of as a business arrangement.Size matteredIf you thought that men‘s issue with the size of their manhood was a 21st century thing then think again guys andgirls. In the Middle Ages it was highly fashionable for British men to wear a codpiece. A codpiece was a flap or pouchthat men wore over their trousers to exaggerate the size of their crotch.
  • 87. Playing away from homeWe all know the WWII poster that urged men and women to ―Keep calm and carry on‖ but have you heard about theother, naughtier slogan that was printed in government brochures? The slogan went: "Dont forget – Put it on beforeyou put it in." It was no surprise that many men returned from WWII with sexually transmitted diseases.BurlesqueBurlesque may seem like a modern day phenomena, but the truth is Burlesque, in one form or another, has beenaround for centuries. The queen of burlesque, Dita Von Tease, points to Aristophanes as being the ―founder‖ of thestriptease. Aristophanes wrote a cheeky, titillating play back in the 5th century BC.The G SpotThe G spot was unidentified until 1950 when Dr. Ernest Gräfenberg underwent a few experiments and found thatattention to this area could trigger powerful O moments in women. Dr. Ernest Gräfenberg is in fact the G spot‘snamesake and was also the first to claim that this spot could cause female ejaculation.The first pornographyIt turns out that pornography has always been taboo. In 1524 the horny Marcantonio Raimondi published 16engravings of people throughout history getting it on. Unfortunately for Marcantonio the Pope at the time did notshare his open approach to sex and placed poor Raimondi in prison for a year.The changing shape of boobsThese days it would seem that most women want bigger boobs, but like our clothes boobs have always been subjectto changing fashions. In the Middle Ages people preferred small boobs and women wore corsets that flattened their
  • 88. chests. During the Renaissance it was popular in Spain to have cone shaped boobs – it seems Madonna was not thetrend setter we once thought.ContraceptionIt was only in the mid 1600s that condoms were used as a contraceptive. These early condoms were made fromlinen. It would seem that women were a little more proactive when it came to contraception than the guys. Womenused crocodile dung, honey, mercury, sneezing and jumping backwards as early as 1850 BC.10 surprising things that improve your sex lifeCrazy things that make sex betterLots of things can improve your sex life, but some of them can be strange, scary and verysurprising. Here are 10 shocking things that can make your sex life fantastic:Embracing your bootyYou may hate your big behind, but the chances are he secretly loves it. Although a lot of women want smaller butts,research has found that men are attracted to bigger rears because they signal a woman‘s fertility.CeleryThe time when a salad was a food for girls is gone fellers, and if you want to improve your sex life you better startchomping on the green stuff. Celery releases pheromones when you eat it that turn you on, and in turn makes youmore attractive to women.
  • 89. Sex bansDenying yourself for short periods will give you a great build up and when you do finally indulge, the sex will beamazing. If you can‘t manage a sex ban, instead use the no-touch rule, where you can‘t touch your bed buddy,unless you use a ―tool‖, like a scarf or a feather.The Swiss-ballIt turns out that the most fun piece of gym equipment around can also improve your sex life. Guys, you should doSwiss-ball press-ups, whilst girls you should use the Swiss ball to do kegels and ball squeezes. This will strengthenyour pelvic floor muscles.HuggingResearch suggests that the closer a couple feels to each other the more sex they have. Hugging increases youroxytocin levels – the hormone that makes us feel intimate with the person we‘re hugging. So if you want more loving,get cuddling.
  • 90. ScarsAlthough scars may make you think of pirates, apparently women love them. Men with mild facial scars were rankedas more attractive. For those guys who want a long-term girl though, scars are not the thing to go for. Women saidmen with scars were not marriage material.Having another birthdayIf you want better sex then it‘s time to have another birthday as researchers have found that older people have bettersex. They cite better body image, more confidence and a stronger relationship as being the key reasons older peoplehave better sex.Sucking toesFor many the thought of someone else‘s feet makes them queasy, but to a lot of people feet are a big, big turn on. Infact, feet are the most popular fetish, so even if you don‘t think you like your partner‘s toes maybe it‘s time you givethem a little attention – you may be surprised.ChocolateNot many people need an excuse to tuck into some chocolate, but if you are one of those people then remember thata few squares of dark chocolate can boost both your energy levels and your mood; in turn this will improve your sexlife.Long legsWe all know that men love long legs, but it seems women like their guys to have a giraffe-like pair of pins too. Peoplewhose legs are 5% longer than average are considered more attractive. So if you want more sex invest in some highheeled shoes.COMPILED AND PREPARED BY AAKASH SHAH…..HOPE ITS USEFUL TO YOU …….