SchoolDude University 2009 NB All NB All material in this session is presented for educational purposes under the provisions of “Fair Use” in The Copyright Act (17 U.S.C. § 107) Presented by SchoolDude.com in association with Sales Training, Inc.

LEARNING OBJECTIVES How you can develop/increase your attractiveness and charisma – so that people will want to communicate with you Ways of learning and practicing the “sciences” of influence and persuasion How to handle difficult people SchoolDude University 2009

LEARNING OBJECTIVES

How you can develop/increase your attractiveness and charisma – so that people will want to communicate with you

Ways of learning and practicing the “sciences” of influence and persuasion

How to handle difficult people

SchoolDude University 2009 Presenter: Jim Joyce [email_address] Over 25 years of success in Sales/Management/Recruiting/Training Experienced in: * Professional Selling Skills® * Account Development Strategies® * Solution Selling® * Strategic Selling® * Phone Power® * 13 Basic Closes® * Selling to VITO® * DISC® * Interpersonal Management Skills® * Highlands Program * A Study of Values® Driving Ability Quiz ® * Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator® Trained and coached hundreds to be successful Can help make you successful

Presenter: Jim Joyce [email_address]

Over 25 years of success in Sales/Management/Recruiting/Training

Experienced in:

* Professional Selling Skills® * Account Development Strategies®

* Solution Selling® * Strategic Selling®

* Phone Power® * 13 Basic Closes®

* Selling to VITO® * DISC®

* Interpersonal Management Skills® * Highlands Program * A Study of Values® Driving Ability Quiz ® * Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator®

Trained and coached hundreds to be successful

Can help make you successful

SchoolDude University 2009 TOPICS for DISCUSSION WHY are “PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS” IMPORTANT? - Definition and Rationale TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “ CHARISMA ” The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

TOPICS for DISCUSSION

WHY are “PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS” IMPORTANT?

- Definition and Rationale

TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS

PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES

DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “ CHARISMA ”

The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION

HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

USEFUL QUOTES “ A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.” - - Wilson Mizner SchoolDude University 2009 “ Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood.” - - Stephen R. Covey (7 Habits of Highly Effective People) “ Once a human being has arrived on this earth, communication is the largest single factor determining what kinds of relationships he makes with others and what happens to him in the world about him.” - - Virginia Satir (Peoplemaking)

SchoolDude University 2009 WHY are PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS IMPORTANT? First, a Definition : “P ersonal Communication is the process of sending and receiving information between two or more people. ” - - Wikipedia Rationale: “Improving the way we communicate with our spouses, children, colleagues, customers and suppliers may often lead to better results, an empowering sense of cooperation, and a general good atmosphere.” - - Amir Elion (EzineArticles.com)

SchoolDude University 2009 TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS One way - - > Most mainstream media, this class?  Two way < - - > IM, telephone, this class?  Then: Oral Written Nonverbal But “usually applied to spoken communication that takes place between two or more individuals on a personal, face-to-face level.” - - Answers.com Bryant Pond, ME October 11, 1983!

TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS

One way - - > Most mainstream media, this class? 

Two way < - - > IM, telephone, this class? 

Then:

Oral

Written

Nonverbal

But “usually applied to spoken communication that takes place between two or more individuals on a personal, face-to-face level.” - - Answers.com

SchoolDude University 2009 PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES Generally, one-way or two-way Then 1 : Controlling – one-way, directing, not looking for feedback Egalitarian – two-way, stimulate sharing of information Structuring – one-way, imposing (ex. schedules, policies) Dynamic – two-way, inspiring, motivational Relinquishing – two-way, consensus Withdrawal – one-way, avoidance Examples? 1 Sources: Answers.com + Bateman, Thomas S., and Carl P. Zeithaml ( Management: Function and Strategy. Irwin, 1990.)

PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES

Generally, one-way or two-way

Then 1 :

Controlling – one-way, directing, not looking for feedback

Egalitarian – two-way, stimulate sharing of information

Structuring – one-way, imposing (ex. schedules, policies)

Dynamic – two-way, inspiring, motivational

Relinquishing – two-way, consensus

Withdrawal – one-way, avoidance

Examples?

1 Sources: Answers.com + Bateman, Thomas S., and Carl P. Zeithaml ( Management: Function and Strategy. Irwin, 1990.)

DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “CHARISMA” First, a definition: “ … an uncanny ability to lead, charm, persuade, inspire, and/or influence people …” - - Wikipedia Importance: “… in some successful companies, you'd be hard pressed to find a person in any influential position who doesn't have some measure of charisma.” - - David G. Jensen, Search Masters International SchoolDude University 2009 www.influencerising.com

DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “CHARISMA”

First, a definition: “ … an uncanny ability to lead, charm, persuade, inspire, and/or influence people …” - - Wikipedia

Importance:

“… in some successful companies, you'd be hard pressed to find a person in any

influential position who doesn't have some measure of charisma.” - - David G. Jensen,

Search Masters International

The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION “ Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” - - Thomas Kempis Best resource is still “How to Win Friends and Influence People” - - Dale Carnegie – 1936 Major sections and points: (Source – Wikipedia) 1.1 Fundamental Techniques in Handling People 1.2 Six Ways to Make People Like You 1.3 Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking 1.4 Be a Leader: How to Change People without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment 1.5 Letters That Produce Miraculous Results 1.6 Seven Rules For Making Your Home Life Happier SchoolDude University 2009

The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION

“ Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” - - Thomas Kempis

Best resource is still “How to Win Friends and Influence People”

- - Dale Carnegie – 1936

Major sections and points: (Source – Wikipedia)

1.1 Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1.2 Six Ways to Make People Like You

1.3 Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1.4 Be a Leader: How to Change People without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

1.5 Letters That Produce Miraculous Results

1.6 Seven Rules For Making Your Home Life Happier

… INFLUENCE and PERSUASION (cont’d) Fundamental Techniques in Handling People: - - Dale Carnegie “How to Win Friends and Influence People” – 1936 Don't criticize, condemn or complain. Give honest and sincere appreciation. Arouse in the other person an eager want. SchoolDude University 2009 www.edbatista.com

… INFLUENCE and PERSUASION (cont’d)

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People:

- - Dale Carnegie “How to Win Friends

and Influence People” – 1936

Don't criticize, condemn or complain.

Give honest and sincere appreciation.

Arouse in the other person an eager want.

… INFLUENCE and PERSUASION (cont’d) Six Ways to Make People Like You: Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk in the terms of the other man's interest. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely - - Dale Carnegie “How to Win Friends and Influence People” - 1936 SchoolDude University 2009

… INFLUENCE and PERSUASION (cont’d)

Six Ways to Make People Like You:

Become genuinely interested in other people.

Smile.

Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

Talk in the terms of the other man's interest.

Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely

- - Dale Carnegie “How to Win Friends and Influence People” - 1936

HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE &quot;THE SUCCESS OF ANY EVENT IS DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL TO THE TIMELY PREPARATION.&quot; - - L. Ron Hubbard Follow these seven steps to prepare yourself for dealing with the difficult people in your life. 1. Make the decision to face up to the person directly and by yourself. 2. Write down the exact problem you need to handle and your goal for the confrontation. 3. Write down a Plan/List of Points You Need to Make to Support Your Goal 4. Write down objections, reactions or disagreements the other person may have. 5. Organize your notes and gather supportive documents. 6. Arrange the meeting where you will not be disturbed, preferably in a space you control. 7. Start the meeting. Source: http://www.tipsforsuccess.org/difficult-people.htm SchoolDude University 2009

HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

&quot;THE SUCCESS OF ANY EVENT IS DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL TO THE TIMELY PREPARATION.&quot; - - L. Ron Hubbard

Follow these seven steps to prepare yourself for dealing with the difficult people in your life.

1. Make the decision to face up to the person directly and by yourself.

2. Write down the exact problem you need to handle and your goal for the confrontation.

3. Write down a Plan/List of Points You Need to Make to Support Your Goal

4. Write down objections, reactions or disagreements the other person may have.

5. Organize your notes and gather supportive documents.

6. Arrange the meeting where you will not be disturbed, preferably in a space you control.

7. Start the meeting. Source: http://www.tipsforsuccess.org/difficult-people.htm

SchoolDude University 2009 On a piece of paper , each team take about 5-7 minutes to agree on ONE common “Concern” about incorporating Personal Communications Skills into your work and the “Cause” of that concern. Your spokesperson will then take 1-2 minutes to describe the team’s concern to the rest of us and we’ll suggest “Cures.” CONCERN (PROBLEM/DIFFICULTY) CAUSE (SOURCE) CURE (SOLUTION)

SchoolDude University 2009 TOPICS for DISCUSSION WHY are “PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS” IMPORTANT? - Definition and Rationale TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “CHARISMA” The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

TOPICS for DISCUSSION

WHY are “PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS” IMPORTANT?

- Definition and Rationale

TYPES of PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS

PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS STYLES

DEFINITON and IMPORTANCE of “CHARISMA”

The “SCIENCES” of INFLUENCE and PERSUASION

HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

LEARNING OBJECTIVES How you can develop/increase your attractiveness and charisma Ways of learning and practicing the “sciences” of influence and persuasion How to Handle difficult people SchoolDude University 2009

LEARNING OBJECTIVES

How you can develop/increase your attractiveness and charisma

Ways of learning and practicing the “sciences” of influence and persuasion

How to Handle difficult people

“ It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.” – Yogi Berra And “GOOD COMMUNICATING!! SchoolDude University 2009 (It’s Over!!) For a virtual copy of this and my other presentations at this year’s SDU, please e-mail me or see: http://docs.google.com then: id = jpjoyce@salestraininginc.com pw = salestraining

For a virtual copy of this and my other presentations at this year’s SDU, please e-mail me or see: http://docs.google.com then: id = jpjoyce@salestraininginc.com pw = salestraining