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10 Key Concepts for Mentor Training: Sequoia High School Academy Programs
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10 Key Concepts for Mentor Training: Sequoia High School Academy Programs



This training was delivered to mentors at Sequoia High School Academy Programs on October 24, 2013.

This training was delivered to mentors at Sequoia High School Academy Programs on October 24, 2013.



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    10 Key Concepts for Mentor Training: Sequoia High School Academy Programs 10 Key Concepts for Mentor Training: Sequoia High School Academy Programs Presentation Transcript

    • Transforming lives through the power of mentoring 10 Key Concepts to Know and Do as a Mentor Sarah Kremer, ATR-BC Program Director, Mentoring Institute © 2013 Friends for Youth
    • Introductions •  Name •  Career •  Previous mentoring experience
    • Who Mentored You?
    • 1. Listen more than you talk
    • Talk while doing other things and remember to share reciprocally Keep it going and keep it light if necessary Be prepared for unexpected answers Listening is most important; timing is pretty important, too Mentoring Partnership of Minnesota
    • BARRIERS BUILDERS •  Assuming •  Checking •  Rescuing/ Explaining •  Exploring •  Directing •  Expecting Too Much Too Soon •  Adultisms •  Encouraging/ Inviting •  Celebrating •  Respecting Maine Support Network
    • Activity: Pair Share •  Find someone you don’t know very well •  Assign Crabs and Whales •  Crabs and Whales take turns with sharing stories focused on certain topics •  When one person talks, the other actively listens – no verbal feedback •  2 minutes each topic
    • 2. Stay in your lane
    • A Mentor Is… •  •  •  •  •  •  Trusted friend Listener Coach Caring Guide Supporter Helper (when asked)
    • A Mentor Is Not… •  •  •  •  •  •  Savior Parent Fixer Cool Peer Tutor Cash machine
    • At the of positive mentoring effects is the development of a strong relationship between mentor and youth. Grossman and Johnson, 1999
    • The relationship is the intervention. Johnston, 2005
    • 3. Be there and follow through
    • Ineffective Mentoring “Mentor practices that lead to a disappointing relationship can have an adverse effect, eroding a youth’s self-esteem and trust in adults.” Grossman and Rhodes, 1999
    • Ineffective Mentoring 1 0 -1 Competence Attendance Prosocial Abstinence -2 -3 -4 -5 < 6 mos. 6-12 mos. > 12 mos. Grossman & Rhodes, 2001
    • Stages of Relationship : introduction, first impressions, seeking connections : bonding, looking for the positive : testing, disillusionment, questioning first impressions : “real” relationship, plateau of trust, comfort, mutual understanding : closure, looking forward, reflection
    • 4. Provide resiliency & strengthsbased support
    • Resiliency Approach
    • Positive Mentor Characteristics •  Emotionally balanced •  Non-judgmental •  Capable of unconditional positive regard •  Able to share life stories •  Sensitive and responsive to individual issues •  Flexible •  Strengths-based •  Able to maintain boundaries •  Youth-focused DuBois et al; Grossman & Johnson; Grossman & Rhodes; Spencer
    • Positive Mentor Attitude •  •  •  •  •  •  •  •  Understand relationship is intervention Take responsibility for relationship Will follow through on commitment Respect youth viewpoint Have desire to help youth through issues Realize cannot solve all issues Maintain realistic expectations Negotiate family relationships but focus on youth •  Rely on program for support DuBois et al; Grossman & Johnson; Grossman & Rhodes; Spencer
    • 5. Be open and respectful of cultural differences
    • Impact of Culture •  Three big cultural areas –  Generational –  Family Systems –  Socioeconomic/Class •  Learn about and appreciate BOTH similarities and differences •  Examine own prejudices and stereotypes
    • Cultural Awareness •  •  •  •  •  Be open, curious, respectful Don’t make assumptions Be mindful of your language Don’t try to be something you are not Acknowledge systems of oppression and discrimination in our society •  Don’t reinforce stereotypes •  Integrate sharing opportunities
    • Youth Development •  Prepares young people to meet challenges of adolescence and adulthood through coordinated, progressive series of activities and experiences which help them to become socially, morally, emotionally, physically, and cognitively competent •  Broader developmental needs of youth vs. focusing on problems •  Strengths-based vs. deficit-based •  Youth are resources, not problems
    • 41 Developmental Assets •  40 common sense, positive experiences and qualities that help influence choices young people make and help them become caring, responsible, successful adults •  Basis in youth development, resiliency, and prevention research •  Framework has become one of most widely used approach to positive youth development http://www.search-institute.org/developmental-assets
    • Mentoring as Asset Intervention •  Not only reducing risky behavior but supporting strengths •  Assist in providing assets where possible and appropriate, not providing all of them or solving all problems •  Assets grounded in relationships
    • Activity: Seeing with Strengths For each description of behavior on the left, think of an alternate strength-based description Bossy Domineering Fearful Loud Mean Nosey Quiet Rigid Sneaky Stubborn Leader Charismatic Careful Expressive Power Seeker High Curiosity Thoughtful High Sense of Order Inventive Persistent
    • 6. Encourage growth in your mentee
    • Mindset Dweck, 2006
    • D “ABILITY” “EFFORT” Dweck, 2006
    • Role Play
    • 7. Be who you are
    • Relational Intervention: Authenticity “So I was like… not telling her anything. … I was telling her some stuff, yeah. But then we started seeing each other, so I’d tell her more stuff, like about me, and what I do and stuff like that.” Shadow, a mentee “He had to be real with me, you know. I can’t get close to nobody without them being real with me, you know. And without you being real with me, you can’t be close with me. He brought it to me real, so I was like, okay.” Demetrious, mentee Spencer, 2006
    • 8. Have fun and enjoy your mentee
    • Relational Intervention: Companionship “He’s my best, best, best friend.” Maurice, a mentee “Until I have to go buy him adult diapers for an old folks home.” Shaggy, a mentee “I just really like him and I enjoy spending time with him… and now five hours goes by like nothing… it’s become very easy.” Frank, a mentor “The best part is being together and being with Frank.” T.K. Williams, Frank’s mentee Spencer, 2006
    • What Works Best? How mentors approach mentoring relationship How mentors and mentees decide what to do together What happens during meetings Success of mentoring relationship Karcher & Nakkula, 2010
    • 2. Mentoring Activities Goal-directed: explicit outcomes are priority Relational: building and sustaining relationship is priority
    • Activity: Relational or Goal-Directed Identify the relational and the goal-directed activity in each pair
    • 3. Relational Intervention: Collaboration “He supports me in like, he asks me… what I’ve been doing in like, science since I like science a lot. And what I’ve been doing in math and it supports me… to do more work in science and math and other subjects.” JaShawn, a mentee “I’d talk to him on Monday and he’d say oh, I can’t wait for Saturday. He just really hated school.” Wolfgang, a mentor Spencer, 2006
    • 9. Be flexible in your approach and expectations
    • Raise your hand if you EXPECT: 1.  2.  3.  4.  My mentee and I will immediately connect with each other. My mentee and I will always get along. My mentee will thank me when I check in on him/her. My mentee and I will get along well because we share a similar cultural background or have had similar experiences growing up. 5.  My mentee will thank me for my commitment to him/her. 6.  This experience will be a lot of fun and little effort. 7.  This experience will look good on my résumé.
    • 10. Rely on program for support
    • • Agree to timeframe and monthly commitment Mentor • Be reliable and flexible • Adhere to policies and procedures • Communicate regularly with mentee • Be on time for meetings or call • Attend required trainings and activities • Communicate regularly with staff • Report anything causing harm
    • Crisis Response •  If emergency response needed, contact 911 •  Contact mentee’s parents/guardians immediately •  Contact Director and Instructor staff immediately –  Provide necessary intervention and/or referrals
    • Reporting Child Abuse •  Includes physical, emotional, sexual abuse and neglect •  Always believe youth – they are telling adult for reason •  Immediately report any suspicion of abuse to program staff •  Program staff are mandated reporters and must contact appropriate services within 72 hours •  May or may not know of resulting actions
    • Keeping Confidentiality These examples do not fall under what is considered confidential and must be reported by mentors immediately: ü  When mentee or another child is at risk of harm to themselves or others ü  When mentee or another child is being abused, neglected, or exploited ü  When mentee reveals clear intent to commit crime that reasonably is expected to result in injury of person
    • Healthy Closure •  •  •  Imperative to hold Closure meeting All involved come to common understandings and expectations Many mentees’ experiences with endings are poor –  –  –  Promises made are often not kept They may never know what caused ending They often will believe it was their fault Confront reality of situation Acknowledge learning Reflect on positives Express thoughts and feelings
    • Activity: Build Ideal Mentor Think about representing characteristic or quality of an ideal mentor in visual form •  Example: ears for being a good listener Add visual element to outline of mentor Everyone contributes Creativity is encouraged! No wrong way to participate - unless you don’t participate
    • Closing
    • “Positive relationships are seen as the primary way that mentoring leads to improved outcomes for youth who are mentored.” Nation, Keener, Wandersman, & DuBois, 2005
    • Homework Highly recommended: Paul Tough (2012) How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character
    • Thank you!
    • www.mentoringinstitute.org 650-559-0200 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Friends-for-Youth/ 105093182858863 http://twitter.com/friendsforyouth http://www.friendsforyouth.blogspot.com/ http://www.youtube.com/user/FriendsforYouthOrg