Name: Yolande Remy
Directions: The following are examples adapted from Joshua Freedman's At the Heart of
Leadership: How to Get Results with Emotional Intelligence. He argues that we often experience
emotions in a pattern. For example, similar situations will trigger a type of response. It will help
us, he argues, if we learn to recognize the pattern and to dig deeper to explore the reasons why
we feel the way we do. Then, we should look for the wisdom in the situation and response; in
other words, we should look for a lesson to learn to improve ourselves.
Using the following "typical" college student examples, reflect on your emotional reaction to
these types of situations and what you think the wisdom, or lesson, is in each.
1. EMOTION: DISCOMFORT
TYPICAL SITUATION: You walk into a class for the first time and the professor seems
uninterested to teach or uninteresting in general. You suddenly get worried that you will
not enjoy this class—and you have to have it for your degree.
YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THIS SITUATION: I haven’t reached that type of class yet.
If I did though, I would definitely talk to an advisor to switch to another class.
THE LESSON TO BE LEARNED: The lesson I would learn is to rate my professor
before going to that class or ask previous students about him.
2. EMOTION: ANXIETY/FEAR
TYPICAL SITUATION: You walk into class where the professor explains everything that you
are going to do this semester. He talks about a 15-page research paper, field studies, and
weekly journals. You don't even have access to a computer.
YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THIS SITUATION: I had to stay after class until I was completely
done with research paper. I was hungry and tired of looking at the computer.
THE LESSON TO BE LEARNED: I couldn’t revise the paper or edit it because I don’t
have internet access at home. I sometimes turn the assignment as is. My grades for
the assignments were not intriguing.
Tapping into Emotions
3. EMOTION: EXCITEMENT
TYPICAL SITUATION: You find out that you won a scholarship that will pay for
books, tuition, and fees when you transfer to a four-year university next semester.
You can't wait to share the good news with your family because they were
having a hard time helping support you while you were in college.
YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THIS SITUATION: My mom was so happy because
now she can finally move back to her country and be happy. But after
we discussed the circumstances of my baby, we concluded that I
couldn’t go because I’m not going to be able to take care of her on
THE LESSON TO BE LEARNED: I lost my opportunity to actually live the
4. EMOTION: JOY
TYPICAL SITUATION: You have taken your last final exam and will be graduating
next week in front of your family, friends, and co-workers—and a few people
who thought you wouldn't make it. You have a job ready and waiting for you in
your field of study. While the pay may not be high, it offers great opportunities for
advancement. Your two children are proud to tell everyone that their mom has
a college degree, and you know that they will be more likely to attend college
because you did.
YOUR EXPERIENCE IN THIS SITUATION: my family and I were overwhelmed and
couldn’t wait for the big day to prove everyone that doubted me wrong.
THE LESSON TO BE LEARNED: I In life you have to make mistakes, so you can
learn from them. Those who don’t learn from their own mistakes make it
harder for themselves.