Promoting a
Marriage Culture
© 2002 International Educational Foundation
IEF is responsible for the content of this presen...
Marriage & Family
Besieged

© IEF 2
Rise In
Divorce
 Up over 200%
in U.S. 19601998
Annual number of
divorces
per 1000 unwed
females
over age 15

 Up 130% in...
Children of Divorced
or Single Parents at
Risk
 Emotional problems
 Delinquency
 Dropping out of school
 Abuse of sex ...
Marriage Rates
Declining
 Down by 40% in
U.S. since 1960
Annual number of
marriages
per 1000 unwed females
over
age 15

...
Births Outside
Marriage
 Sweden —
50%
 France —
35%
 U.S.
30%

—
© IEF 6
Rise in
Cohabitation in America
900% increase
5

4.2 Million Couples

4
3
2
1

0.5 Million Couples

1960
1998
Source: U.S....
Reasons for
Cohabitation
 Fear of divorce
 Less commitment
 “Test-drive”
relationship
 Government
incentives
© IEF 8
Cohabitation Is No
Panacea
 Increased conflict and
poorer communication
Source: David G. Meyers,
The Pursuit of Happiness...
Natural Family
Order
Facilitates Love
 Guides family
harmony

© IEF 10
Positions in the Family
Grandparen
ts &
Parents

Tru
e
Husban
Lov
d
Elder e

Younge
r
Sibling
Wife

Siblin
g
Children &
Gr...
The Four Spheres of
Love
 Child’s
Sphere
 Sibling’s
Sphere
 Spouse’s
Sphere
 Parent’s

© IEF 12
Parents —
Primary Moral
Teachers
Schools can
support
parents in this
role

© IEF 13
Passes On a
Legacy

Conserves and transforms
 Grandparents — Represent
the Past
 Parents — Represent the
Present

© IEF ...
Family as Royalty of
Love
 Father and Grandfather
— Kings
 Mother and
Grandmother
— Queens
 Child
— Prince and Princess...
Strong Families Have
Focus Higher than
Self
 Altruistic
purpose
 Service to
community

© IEF 16
Uniqueness of Marriage
Joins two lives





Families
Possessions
Destiny
Bodies

Sex — Exclusive
to the spouse
© IEF 1...
Profound Significance
of Marriage
Highest
expressio
n of yang.
One half
of
humanity.

Highest
expressi
on of
yin.
One half...
Conjugal
Relationship
Emotional
and
psychologica
l bonding
© IEF 19
Conjugal
Relationship
Produces
physical and
spiritual force
to create a
new being
© IEF 20
Conjugal
Relationship

Continu
es
lineage

© IEF 21
With Freedom
Comes
Responsibility
Conscien
ce

© IEF 22
With Freedom
Comes
Responsibility
Conscien
ce
Spous
e
© IEF 23
With Freedom
Comes
Responsibility
Conscien
ce
Spous
e
Child

© IEF 24
“Sex is most joyful and fulfilling –
most emotionally safe as well as
physically safe – within a loving,
total and binding...
Sexual Desire & Self–
Control
Sexual Desires

Sexual Activity

Normal & healthy

Controlling it is
normal & healthy

© IEF...
Human Sexuality
Involves Freedom

 Physical  Social
&
 Moral
Instinctu
al

 Physical &
Instinctual
© IEF 27
Mutual Ownership
of
Physical Sexuality
One‘s sexual expression
for spouse alone
 Fulfills its function
completely
 Based...
Inspirational Family
Gathering
 Reading wisdom
literature
 Sharing stories of
virtue

© IEF 29
Promote Healthy
Living Among Youth
 Self
respect
 Sobriety
 Sexual
purity
© IEF 30
Fulfilled Couples —
Source of Strength
 Better parents
 Mentors to other couples
 Pillars of the community

© IEF 31
Strengthen
Marriages
 Rededication
ceremonies
 Mentoring young
couples

© IEF 32
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TIMD-IEF Part 8

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  • Rise in Divorce
    Rates Since 1960
    France Ð Up 300%
    United States Ð Up 230%
    Sweden Ð Up 230%
    Japan Ð Up 150%
    Source:US Department of Education, 1992
  • Youth In Crisis
    Sexual promiscuity
    Drug and alcohol abuse
    AIDS & STDs
    Crime and violence
    Declining academic performance
  • Rogers Introduces
    Therapy-Based School Reform
    Adult therapeutic methods applied to child education
    Carl Rogers, Founder of Client-Centered Therapy
  • Explosion of Destructive
    Youth Behavior Since 1940s
    1940s School Problems
    1.Talking out of turn
    2.Chewing gum
    3.Making noise
    4.Running indoors
    5.Getting out of line
    6.Improper clothing
    7.Littering
    1990s School Problems
    1.Drug abuse
    2.Alcohol abuse
    3.Pregnancy
    4.Suicide
    5.Rape
    6.Robbery
    7.Assault
    Source:William J. Bennett et al., Index of Leading Cultural indicators, Empower America, Mar. 1993
  • Characteristics of
    ÒNon-DirectiveÓ Education
    4.Rejects the authority of traditional moral teaching
    5. Undermines the parentsÕ role in education
  • Best of the 20th Century
  • Strongest
    Influences on Students
    1950
    1.Home
    2.School
    3.Church
    4.Peers
    5.TV
    1990
    1.Peers
    2.TV
    3.Home
    4.School
    5.Church
    Source:Michigan State University study, 1990
  • Education for Mastery
    1.Academic education
    2.Technical education
    3.Physical education
  • Education in
    Ethical Standards
    1.Understanding the standards for good relationships
    2.Fulfilling family roles & responsibilities
    3.Training in behavior, attitudes and manners
    ¥Creating harmony
  • 1.Joins two lives¥ Shared possessions¥ Merged families¥ Common destiny¥ Physical union2.Conjugal intimacy is not shared with anyone else
  • Bonds two people together
  • Can create a new person
  • S-46Can continue a lineage
  • S-59Second responsibility of conjugal loveDevotion & service sustains marriage
  • “Sex is most joyful and fulfilling - most emotionally safe as well as physically safe - when it occurs within a loving, total and binding commitment...[as in] marriage... the union of two person’s lives.”
    Source: Thomas Lickona, American Educator, Educating for Character
  • S-531.Expresses the joy of conjugal love2.Place where oneness is attained3.Starting point of parenthood4.Allows the fulfillment of the life goal of family
  • TIMD-IEF Part 8

    1. 1. Promoting a Marriage Culture © 2002 International Educational Foundation IEF is responsible for the content of this presentation only if it has not been altered from the original. © IEF 1
    2. 2. Marriage & Family Besieged © IEF 2
    3. 3. Rise In Divorce  Up over 200% in U.S. 19601998 Annual number of divorces per 1000 unwed females over age 15  Up 130% in China Sources: Statistical Abstract of the United States, 1998; 1985 – 1992 Statistics Bureau, Chinese Ministry of Civil Affairs © IEF 3
    4. 4. Children of Divorced or Single Parents at Risk  Emotional problems  Delinquency  Dropping out of school  Abuse of sex and drugs  Poverty © IEF 4
    5. 5. Marriage Rates Declining  Down by 40% in U.S. since 1960 Annual number of marriages per 1000 unwed females over age 15  56% of adults are married Source: National Center for Health statistics; US Bureau of the Census, 1998 © IEF 5
    6. 6. Births Outside Marriage  Sweden — 50%  France — 35%  U.S. 30% — © IEF 6
    7. 7. Rise in Cohabitation in America 900% increase 5 4.2 Million Couples 4 3 2 1 0.5 Million Couples 1960 1998 Source: U.S. Bureau of the Census, Current Population Reports, © IEF 7
    8. 8. Reasons for Cohabitation  Fear of divorce  Less commitment  “Test-drive” relationship  Government incentives © IEF 8
    9. 9. Cohabitation Is No Panacea  Increased conflict and poorer communication Source: David G. Meyers, The Pursuit of Happiness  Greater likelihood of divorce  7 times greater risk of violence to women Source: National Crime Victimization Survey, US Department of Justice, 1992 © IEF 9
    10. 10. Natural Family Order Facilitates Love  Guides family harmony © IEF 10
    11. 11. Positions in the Family Grandparen ts & Parents Tru e Husban Lov d Elder e Younge r Sibling Wife Siblin g Children & Grandchildre © IEF 11
    12. 12. The Four Spheres of Love  Child’s Sphere  Sibling’s Sphere  Spouse’s Sphere  Parent’s © IEF 12
    13. 13. Parents — Primary Moral Teachers Schools can support parents in this role © IEF 13
    14. 14. Passes On a Legacy Conserves and transforms  Grandparents — Represent the Past  Parents — Represent the Present © IEF 14 © IEF 14
    15. 15. Family as Royalty of Love  Father and Grandfather — Kings  Mother and Grandmother — Queens  Child — Prince and Princess © IEF 15
    16. 16. Strong Families Have Focus Higher than Self  Altruistic purpose  Service to community © IEF 16
    17. 17. Uniqueness of Marriage Joins two lives     Families Possessions Destiny Bodies Sex — Exclusive to the spouse © IEF 17
    18. 18. Profound Significance of Marriage Highest expressio n of yang. One half of humanity. Highest expressi on of yin. One half of humanit y. © IEF 18
    19. 19. Conjugal Relationship Emotional and psychologica l bonding © IEF 19
    20. 20. Conjugal Relationship Produces physical and spiritual force to create a new being © IEF 20
    21. 21. Conjugal Relationship Continu es lineage © IEF 21
    22. 22. With Freedom Comes Responsibility Conscien ce © IEF 22
    23. 23. With Freedom Comes Responsibility Conscien ce Spous e © IEF 23
    24. 24. With Freedom Comes Responsibility Conscien ce Spous e Child © IEF 24
    25. 25. “Sex is most joyful and fulfilling – most emotionally safe as well as physically safe – within a loving, total and binding commitment… [as in] marriage.” Source: Thomas Lickona, American Educator, Educating for Character © IEF 25
    26. 26. Sexual Desire & Self– Control Sexual Desires Sexual Activity Normal & healthy Controlling it is normal & healthy © IEF 26
    27. 27. Human Sexuality Involves Freedom  Physical  Social &  Moral Instinctu al  Physical & Instinctual © IEF 27
    28. 28. Mutual Ownership of Physical Sexuality One‘s sexual expression for spouse alone  Fulfills its function completely  Based on true love © IEF 28
    29. 29. Inspirational Family Gathering  Reading wisdom literature  Sharing stories of virtue © IEF 29
    30. 30. Promote Healthy Living Among Youth  Self respect  Sobriety  Sexual purity © IEF 30
    31. 31. Fulfilled Couples — Source of Strength  Better parents  Mentors to other couples  Pillars of the community © IEF 31
    32. 32. Strengthen Marriages  Rededication ceremonies  Mentoring young couples © IEF 32
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