How to undo “I can't ...”
Andy Hunt
Practical Wellbeing

© Andy Hunt, Practical Wellbeing 2013
If you think you can,
or you think you can't,
you're right!
Henry Ford
What is “I can't” ?

Image courtesy of seyed mustafa zamani
I can't ...
●

speak in public
I can't ...
●

speak in public

●

fall in love
I can't ...
●

speak in public

●

fall in love

●

say that to my mother
I can't ...
●

speak in public

●

fall in love

●

say that to my mother

●

leave this job
I can't ...
●

speak in public

●

fall in love

●

say that to my mother

●

leave this job

●

get out of this relations...
How can we challenge the “can'ts”?
How can we challenge the “can'ts”?

Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
How can we challenge the “can'ts”?
Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
The Meta-Model
How can we challenge the “can'ts”?
Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
The Meta-Model
Modal Operators Of Possibility
Unpacking “I can't”
The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to
help you unpack “I can't”.
Unpacking “I can't”
The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to
help you unpack “I can't”.
But, before I tell you wha...
Unpacking “I can't”
The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to
help you unpack “I can't”.
But, before I tell you wha...
st

1 Question
I can't …
st

1 Question
I can't …

What stops you?
st

1 Question
Two Sorts of Answers
●

Emotional blocks to moving forward
–

Memories of times when you learned this

–

O...
st

1 Question
Two Sorts of Answers
●

Emotional blocks to moving forward
–
–

Other beliefs

–
●

Memories of times when ...
nd

2 Question
I can't …

What would happen if you did?
nd

2 Question
Answer
●

Undesired consequence(s) of stepping beyond
that limitation.
A Question Of Time
What would happen
if you did?

What stops you?

PAST

Now

FUTURE
Tapping On Can'ts
Tapping On Can'ts
1. Unpacking the stoppers
Tapping On Can'ts
1. Unpacking the stoppers
2. Unpacking the what-ifs?
Tapping On Can'ts
1. Unpacking the stoppers
2. Unpacking the what-ifs?
3. Rehearsing a better future
Unpacking The Stoppers
Standard setup
Even though I can't …
I accept myself and how I feel x 3
Unpacking The Stoppers
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't ...
Unpacking The Stoppers
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What stops me?
Unpacking The Stoppers
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What stops me?

●

UE: I can't ...
Unpacking The Stoppers
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What stops me?

●

UE: I can't …

●

UN: What stops m...
Unpacking The Stoppers
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What stops me?

●

UE: I can't …

●

UN: What stops m...
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What would happen if I did?
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What would happen if I did?

●

UE: I can't …
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What would happen if I did?

●

UE: I can't …

●

UN:...
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What would happen if I did?

●

UE: I can't …

●

UN:...
Unpacking The What-Ifs
Alternate statements
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: What would happen if I did?

●

UE: I can't …

●

UN:...
Rehearsing A Better Future
Imagining that you could …
●

EB: I can't …
Rehearsing A Better Future
Imagining that you could …
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: and what if I could … ?
Rehearsing A Better Future
Imagining that you could …
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: and what if I could … ?

●

UE: I can't …
Rehearsing A Better Future
Imagining that you could …
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: and what if I could … ?

●

UE: I can't …

...
Rehearsing A Better Future
Imagining that you could …
●

EB: I can't …

●

SE: and what if I could … ?

●

UE: I can't …

...
Advantages Of This Process
●

Simplicity – just 3 questions
Advantages Of This Process
●
●

Simplicity – just 3 questions
Exploratory – user unpacks their own
experience
Advantages Of This Process
●
●

●

Simplicity – just 3 questions
Exploratory – user unpacks their own
experience
Respectfu...
Advantages Of This Process
●
●

●

●

Simplicity – just 3 questions
Exploratory – user unpacks their own
experience
Respec...
Practice Suggestions
●

Make a note of every time you think or say “I
can't … “, then process those can'ts
Practice Suggestions
●

●

Make a note of every time you think or say “I
can't … “, then process those can'ts
When someone...
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How To Undo I Can't - Webinar Slides

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Short webinar on using a combination of NLP questioning techniques and EFT tapping to free you from the limiting beliefs that start with the words "I can't ..."

The webinar describes a simple, three step process for undoing these limiting beliefs.

You can watch the recording of the webinar here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHvIGr4YukY

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How To Undo I Can't - Webinar Slides

  1. 1. How to undo “I can't ...” Andy Hunt Practical Wellbeing © Andy Hunt, Practical Wellbeing 2013
  2. 2. If you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right! Henry Ford
  3. 3. What is “I can't” ? Image courtesy of seyed mustafa zamani
  4. 4. I can't ... ● speak in public
  5. 5. I can't ... ● speak in public ● fall in love
  6. 6. I can't ... ● speak in public ● fall in love ● say that to my mother
  7. 7. I can't ... ● speak in public ● fall in love ● say that to my mother ● leave this job
  8. 8. I can't ... ● speak in public ● fall in love ● say that to my mother ● leave this job ● get out of this relationship
  9. 9. How can we challenge the “can'ts”?
  10. 10. How can we challenge the “can'ts”? Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
  11. 11. How can we challenge the “can'ts”? Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) The Meta-Model
  12. 12. How can we challenge the “can'ts”? Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) The Meta-Model Modal Operators Of Possibility
  13. 13. Unpacking “I can't” The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to help you unpack “I can't”.
  14. 14. Unpacking “I can't” The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to help you unpack “I can't”. But, before I tell you what they are, think of an “I can't” that is operating in your life
  15. 15. Unpacking “I can't” The Meta Model gives us a couple of questions to help you unpack “I can't”. But, before I tell you what they are, think of an “I can't” that is operating in your life Got one?
  16. 16. st 1 Question I can't …
  17. 17. st 1 Question I can't … What stops you?
  18. 18. st 1 Question Two Sorts of Answers ● Emotional blocks to moving forward – Memories of times when you learned this – Other beliefs – Etc
  19. 19. st 1 Question Two Sorts of Answers ● Emotional blocks to moving forward – – Other beliefs – ● Memories of times when you learned this Etc Acknowledgement of ignorance – “I don't know how”
  20. 20. nd 2 Question I can't … What would happen if you did?
  21. 21. nd 2 Question Answer ● Undesired consequence(s) of stepping beyond that limitation.
  22. 22. A Question Of Time What would happen if you did? What stops you? PAST Now FUTURE
  23. 23. Tapping On Can'ts
  24. 24. Tapping On Can'ts 1. Unpacking the stoppers
  25. 25. Tapping On Can'ts 1. Unpacking the stoppers 2. Unpacking the what-ifs?
  26. 26. Tapping On Can'ts 1. Unpacking the stoppers 2. Unpacking the what-ifs? 3. Rehearsing a better future
  27. 27. Unpacking The Stoppers Standard setup Even though I can't … I accept myself and how I feel x 3
  28. 28. Unpacking The Stoppers Alternate statements ● EB: I can't ...
  29. 29. Unpacking The Stoppers Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What stops me?
  30. 30. Unpacking The Stoppers Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What stops me? ● UE: I can't ...
  31. 31. Unpacking The Stoppers Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What stops me? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: What stops me?
  32. 32. Unpacking The Stoppers Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What stops me? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: What stops me? ● … Process answers to the question
  33. 33. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't …
  34. 34. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What would happen if I did?
  35. 35. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What would happen if I did? ● UE: I can't …
  36. 36. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What would happen if I did? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: What would happen if I did?
  37. 37. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What would happen if I did? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: What would happen if I did? ● ...
  38. 38. Unpacking The What-Ifs Alternate statements ● EB: I can't … ● SE: What would happen if I did? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: What would happen if I did? ● … Process answers to the questions
  39. 39. Rehearsing A Better Future Imagining that you could … ● EB: I can't …
  40. 40. Rehearsing A Better Future Imagining that you could … ● EB: I can't … ● SE: and what if I could … ?
  41. 41. Rehearsing A Better Future Imagining that you could … ● EB: I can't … ● SE: and what if I could … ? ● UE: I can't …
  42. 42. Rehearsing A Better Future Imagining that you could … ● EB: I can't … ● SE: and what if I could … ? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: and what if I could … ?
  43. 43. Rehearsing A Better Future Imagining that you could … ● EB: I can't … ● SE: and what if I could … ? ● UE: I can't … ● UN: and what if I could … ? ● ...
  44. 44. Advantages Of This Process ● Simplicity – just 3 questions
  45. 45. Advantages Of This Process ● ● Simplicity – just 3 questions Exploratory – user unpacks their own experience
  46. 46. Advantages Of This Process ● ● ● Simplicity – just 3 questions Exploratory – user unpacks their own experience Respectful – you are not having to take on someone else's reframes or ideas.
  47. 47. Advantages Of This Process ● ● ● ● Simplicity – just 3 questions Exploratory – user unpacks their own experience Respectful – you are not having to take on someone else's reframes or ideas. Future oriented – mental rehearsal paves the way for doing things differently
  48. 48. Practice Suggestions ● Make a note of every time you think or say “I can't … “, then process those can'ts
  49. 49. Practice Suggestions ● ● Make a note of every time you think or say “I can't … “, then process those can'ts When someone else says “I can't ...” (and it's appropriate) ask them “What stops you?” or “What would happen if you did?”
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